My name is Tuminaro Yamasura. I'm thirty-three working as an accountant in Japan. "Yamasura, you get those papers in yet?" Keko asked stern. Keko was a by the books guy who worked hard.

"Um, yes I've got it all right here," I said.

"You two work way too hard around here," Tommy said poking over my cubicle. Tommy Jotiro was a guy with charm. He didn't always turn in reports on time, but he always talked his way out of it.

"It's called doing your job, and on time by the way," Keko said.

"Hey I do mine in my own time," Tommy said.

"Speaking of that, you got the Kenichi report, right?" Keko asked.

"Yeah you'll have it after lunch," he said.

"Speaking of lunch, who's hungry?" Komiko asked, popping up. Komiko was the energetic girl around the office. She was cute too.

"I think I'll just stay here. I got work to catch up on," I said, not moving my eyes from my computer.

"No way Yamasura boy, drinks are on me," Tommy said standing up.

"Jotiro, what have I said about drinking on lunch," Keko said rolling his eyes.

"It's fine I'm not going to drink too much, and don't call me that would yah," Tommy said.

"Come on Yamasura it will be fun," Komiko said smiling. I always said yes to something when Komiko smiled at me.

"Ok I'll go," I said, picking up my things.

"Looks like I'm tagging along to keep all of you out of trouble," Keko said.

"Yay, I'll grab my coat," Komiko said. As I stood up Tommy ran up next to me.

"Ok, dude you got to ask Komiko out soon."

"No, I think I'll just let her be."

"Naw dude F that, I see the smiles. She doesn't smile for me." I've never heard Tommy swear. I think it's a family thing.

"But you're a creep." I said with a plain face.

"I'll ignore that comment, just do me a favor and look happy." Even though he asked me it as a favor I could not comply. I just sat quietly as the others drank. I liked seeing everyone having fun even if I'm not having fun myself.

Six months ago:

"Kire can I come in," I asked. I heard no response. I knocked on the door again, but no answer. It's always the same. I get home and knock on the door but she won't talk to me. Did I do something wrong? Could my actions have changed the circumstances.

Present day:

I woke up ready to start another day. I got dressed looking bored as I brushed my teeth. I felt like someone was watching me. I turned before I spit but no one was there. I stopped at the 7/11 to grab a soup to heat up at work. I stood in front of the microwave at work as my cup spun around.

"Hey Yamasura," Tommy said, popping up out of nowhere.

"Hello Tommy good morning."

"Is that shrimp?"

"Yes."

"Can I have some?"

"You didn't eat breakfast again, now why is it always me you ask for food."

"Because you're the nice one."

"Despite that I'll decline. I planned on eating all of it myself this time." I pulled the hot soup from the microwave and pulled the top off. As I smelled the hot soup, I noticed something strange. A floating orb right next to Komiko's head. I observed as I pulled noodles to my mouth. The orb turned around and there was a face on it. The face had a long tongue sticking out with these wide eyes staring at me. I just stared back at it. Komiko gave me a look of what are you staring at. I nervously tried to give her a look of I wasn't staring at you when the orb grabbed her chest making a crazy face. I jumped a bit and spilled all my soup on my lap. I freaked out as hot soup burned me. Komiko ran over and started wiping my lap with napkins as the orb was laughing insanely.

"Are you ok?" Komiko asked worriedly.

"I'm fine thank you." She gave me this blushed nervous look. I looked down to see a bump in my pants.

"I'm sorry that shouldn't have happened," I said bowing in apologies. She just walked off fast. Oh god I'm such an idiot.

"Dude that was a nice move," Tommy said wheeling his chair over. I started cleaning my pants.

"That wasn't a move it was an accidental soup spill."

"Right, sure. Whatever you say man." I feel like I can't get anything right in this life I'm leading right now. I sat at my desk being busy.

"Hey man you busy?" Keko asked.

"Just looking over signatures I got time."

"How are you feeling?"

"Good you know. The workflow is good."

"No, not about work, in general how are you feeling?" Every time someone asked me this question, I had to think about it, you know, how I felt in that moment.

"I'm surviving."

"I'm here if you got something on your mind."

"Thanks, I'll take you up on that if something crosses my mind." I feel like everyone just feels sorry for me. I got a raise after it happened and everyone treats me with what feels like forced kindness.

"Hey did you get the numbers for last week?" Tommy asked. His voice boomed over the thin walls of his cubicle.

"Of course, I did," I said typing away.

"Can I see them?"

"No, the point of it, them being reviewed twice is that we both make reports on them. Not you copying my answers like in fourth grade."

You might be reading a stolen copy. Visit Royal Road for the authentic version.

"You make me work harder. That's not a good thing," he said going back to his computer. I stood by the water cooler and looked at the water in my cup. This water is only refillable if I refill it. Nothing is without effort. I noticed the water moving in my cup. As I looked down into the cup the water splashed into my face as a blue hand came out of it. The office laughed as water ran down my face.

"Man, Yamasura, your luck is just, always down," Tommy said, slowing down his speech as Keko was prompting him to stop talking. I just walked to the bathroom and wiped my face off with a hand towel while looking in the mirror.

Nine months ago:

"What did you say dock?" I asked the doctor. The doctor sighed.

"I'm sorry but she didn't make it."

Kire just sat there quietly. I've never heard silence from her. I've never seen the life drained out of her. The doctor tried to explain why this was happening to us. Kire wouldn't have it. I don't think I've heard her scream until now.

Present day:

Tommy did this funny walk over to me as I was grabbing my coat to leave work. "Bro, gaming tonight?"

"I'm not in the mood," I said.

"Dude you can't be like this forever."

"Like what?" I knew what he meant, but I wanted to hear somebody say it.

"All mopey, dude you have to have at least a little fun." Walking home I stopped at the 7/11 to grab dinner. As I picked through random food, I saw the cute cashier glancing at me. As I looked behind me, I saw a man with pale gray skin. I felt disgusted to believe this, but the man that I believe only I can see was watching the cashier and spanking his monkey. I tried to pay for my food quickly.

"So, I see you around here quite a bit. You live around here?" she asked.

"Yes, just up the street."

"Well I hope to see you in here again," she said as I walked out. As I walked by the window outside the pale man was humping a bag of dog food. Sometimes I wish my life was different. Why did I get the short straw of life? Everyone is proud of the work I do, but just cause I'm good at it does that mean that I want to do it forever.

I stood in front of a vending machine outside my apartment. life is just a series of choices. It all starts with the simple stuff. Cherry, or grape. I think I've finally made an honest decision in my life. I'm going with grape. I pulled a coin from my pocket and inserted it into the machine. I pressed the big button labeled grape. The sound of nothing happened. Maybe choices don't matter. What if everything is decided for you? I kicked the machine and jumped around in anger. The sound of aluminum hit my ears. As I turned over the can I pulled from the machine the words diet hit me like a brick being thrown by a snot nosed kid. I headed up my stairs. As I entered my apartment, I tossed the soda in the trash. Diet might as well be poison. I filled a cup with gross tap water, and ate some spicy chips rolled in fancy bread. Will my life ever be something different, and if it won't be I think I'm ok with that.

I got texts in the middle of the night showing videos of my co-workers partying. They think showing me their good times will make me see the fun I could be having. What is fun about going out to random clubs and partying every night. Getting so drunk you don't remember the night before. I like having my memory intact. What's wrong with a simple life. I used to play video games but they're just not fun for me anymore.

The next morning, I sat on my bed looking at the wall. My days off went kind of like this. I don't have much of a social life anymore. Kire had all the friends. None of them want to see me. I guess I wouldn't want to see them either. It would be strange, I guess. I have co-workers but I don't want to make personal relationships. Maybe I'll go to the zoo. I used to like that. Normally I just call work to see if they can use me. I pulled my laptop over to me. I was practicing coding. I thought making a video game would be fun. I had this idea of a skeleton as the main character of an RPG. That's a lot of work to be done with just one person though.

I stood in front of a window of a manga store about mid-day. I walk just about everywhere in town. I haven't read one of these in a while, maybe I'll get back into it. I bought a book with a kid with reddish orange hair on the cover. I walked through the 7/11 to get lunch and dinner. That cute cashier was there again.

"Hello," she said cheerfully.

"Hello," I said back.

"What's in the bag?"

"Oh, nothing just doing some shopping." Before I could notice she was in my bag pulling out my manga book. That was rude anyone else would tell her off. I'm not anyone else.

"Oh, I've read this one. It's great, it's so long though."

"Please give me my book back."

"Here you go. I'm sorry I'm a curious person, my friends say it's a problem."

Five months ago:

I was in the hospital for a whole month. Kire was in there for 3 months. The time we spent apart was definitely a factor. The time spent apart made us realize who we both were. I was a person who didn't need much to survive and she needed everything. People say, in tragic moments is when they show their true colors, but I have never met anyone of these people. They could be right, or maybe I was always like this. Was Kire always like how she is now. I don't know how she is now. I hope she's living the life she wants.

Present day:

I read the first couple pages of the book. Art style was nice. The story was kind of rushed though. The person in this book can see ghosts. He fights them to protect people. That sounds like a lot of work. What if an evil spirit attacked me? What would I do? I laid back in bed reading until I fell asleep. I woke up. I can't believe I took a nap in the middle of the day. What am I an infant? The sounds of the outside world came in through my window. My window faces a place I can't get out of my mind. Memories of stuff that don't bother me, but are still there. The sun reminded me of where the day was going.

A year ago:

"Hey I see you're awake," the doctor said.

"What happened? Where is Kire?" I asked.

"You won't be able to see her for a while, don't worry she's fine," the doctor said.

"Why am I here?" I asked.

"Yamasura you and Kire were in a car crash."

Present day:

The next morning, I awoke to nothing. Silence filled my one room apartment as I got ready for work. The TV just sat there taking up space. I haven't turned that thing on in so long. At work it was casual day. I was wearing a suit. Tommy walked up wearing shorts and a Hawaiian shirt.

"Dude you didn't get the memo," he said.

"No, I got it. Things like this they're not for me."

"Well look, I saw this coming. I brought an extra shirt." The shirt he pulled out was all colorful, bright, and red. I'm not the type to participate in these things.

"You're in a suit, Yamasura, you're such a dork," Komiko said walking by and laughing. Komiko was wearing a shirt with a young boy with messy hair and an old balding man on it, with shorts. Why does it feel like I fail without trying?

"Hey you two, I need those reports today, so don't slack off," Keko said. Keko was wearing a simple attire, but still formal. He looked like an American teacher.

"You don't have faith?" Tommy asked.

"Not in you, and you drag Yamasura down," Keko said. He was right if my cubicle wasn't by Tommy's I could be employee of the month or something. Everyone at work was laughing and having a good time. I wondered what would happen if I joined in. I stood up. Everyone looked at me. I pulled off my jacket and threw it at Tommy.

"Dude what the F," he said.

"Give me the shirt." He pulled out the shirt and threw it to me. I didn't feel any different pulling it on. Maybe if I walked over to the water cooler. I filled a cup with water and stood there. People just walked by. Maybe my efforts were for nothing.

"Hey Yamasura cute shirt," Komiko said walking by. I just nodded.

"Hey I'm wearing the same thing, hell I gave him the shirt!" Tommy yelled watching me. I don't feel the power of casual day, but blending in helps me not feel out of place. I should get one of these shirts. Back at my desk I sat doing work.

"Ok you guys got the reports, right?" Keko asked.

"Yep yep right here," Tommy said waving his forms.

"Here you go," I said handing in mine.

"Good job Jotiro, you managed to turn one in on time," Keko said smiling.

"Hey you're not my father get it, stop calling me that or HR is going to hear from me," Tommy said. I gave Tommy back his shirt and walked home after work. I stopped at the 7/11 just like every night. I stopped right before the door as sounds caused me to listen.

"Just give me all the shit bitch I ain't playing," said a man holding the cashier at gunpoint. She loaded the bag quickly and he made a break for it. As he ran out the door it seems I had one foot out too far and the robber tripped on it. "Are you fucking crazy you want to get shot you son off a bitch," he said pointing the gun at me from the ground. It was at that point I realized a very important thing about myself.

Four months ago:

Kire wouldn't leave the room. Even if I asked really nicely. Nothing. I don't know what to do. As I stepped into the kitchen, I noticed a paper on the ground. It was a list of names. The name Yoriko was circled. The day she left the room was the day I never saw her again.

Three months ago:

"Do you know why you're here?" the doctor asked.

"No," I said.

"What is the last thing you remember?" he asked.

"I don't know."

"Don't be alarmed when I tell you this," the doctor said. He took a pause. "Yamasura, you tried to kill yourself." he took another pause. "If your landlord wasn't around collecting rent, well I don't think you'd be alive."

Present day:

It was at that point I realized a very important thing about myself. I'm not afraid anymore. I pulled his hand towards me. The look in this man's face was pure fear. What was he scared of? Taking a life maybe. Going to jail, or just simply failure. He dropped the gun and ran down the street. As he turned a corner he got tackled by cops.