Since the beginning, I was a coward.

The rain poured down, slowly leeching the warmth from Mother when she held my sister and me close. Anxious and worried, Mother watched the soldier coming home, battered and broken from the horrors of war.

Amid the despair, a glimmer of hope shoned when a soldier broke free from the ranks and ran toward the girl he loved. Separated families rejoiced as they tearfully embraced, their hearts overflowing with longing after years of separation. It was a beautiful scene, one that filled me with a sense of warmth.

In a moment of innocent curiosity, I turned to my mother, asking, "Mama, will I finally get to meet Papa soon?"

My mother's lips remained sealed as she desperately searched for any sign of my father among the passing soldiers. However, even after hundreds of soldiers had passed by, in the end, my mother and a few other women were left to swallow the bitter truth.

Their loved one didn't come home.

My mother's voice trembled, "No... Abbie... W-Why... you promised me..."

It was then that a man in a military uniform, his eyes hidden beneath a tight hat, approached my mother with a solemn expression.

"Lady Nyght," the man said slowly.

"Lord Avalon... Where is my husband?" Mama asked.

His mouth quivered as he quenched his hat. Finally, all he could do was offer my mother a brownish handkerchief.

"Lord Abbhiraka... He sacrificed himself to protect us from The Ultima Eden. The wall he erected around Hilfheim shielded us, allowing us all to return home safely... He died as a hero," the soldier spoke, his voice weighed down by sorrow.

The light on Mother's eyes disappeared in instant. She took the handkerchief, looking at Father's name she delicately embroidered. Then, tears started flowing from her eyes.

"I don't care about that! Please, just give my husband back!

My mother collapsed to her knees in the rain, her screams piercing the sky. "Why... What do we gain from this war? To fight for a single throne? EDEN, ANSWER ME!!"

At that moment, the strong mother we always admired crumbled. My hands tried to reach Mother, but doubt quickly overcome me. What good it would do? I was at lost. What I should do? A chld like me could never understand my mother's pain.

But no, it was just me trying to justify myself. I was just too scared to even try. In the end, I just stood there as Mother cried in pain.

But Big Sis quickly hug Mother and cried with her together. Looking for warm and company below the cold rain, Mother hug BIg Sis tightly. The pain was too great, and no amount of comfort could mend the broken pieces of her heart. Broken glass cannot be put back together. What is lost cannot be returned.

Taken from Royal Road, this narrative should be reported if found on Amazon.

I was taken aback at Mother's breakdown, wondering why did this happen? Why could happiness suddenly disappear?

"To fight over one throne!" With that exclamation suddenly, Ultima Eden, the Goddess of Order, the mightiest deity on Earth, had declared war against all other gods.

Within a matter of weeks, half of the Earth was transformed into a scorching hell, with Eden's conquering the domains of countless gods. She shattered a thousand years of peace and prosperity, leaving only horror and destruction in her wake.

In response, the elder gods joined forces, forming a coalition known as The Company. However, in a cruel twist of fate, they were mercilessly murdered by a nameless god who seized their domains for his wicked desires.

This god proclaimed himself as The Savage God, spreading his ideology of Mutual Assured Destruction throughout the world. He harnessed forbidden technology, unleashing deadly plagues that create monstrous creatures known as Anima, which devoured lives and left nothing but chaos and despair in their wake. He transformed his subjects into soulless puppets, bent on spreading chaos throughout the world.

In this selfish war, there could be no victor. But why did the mighty gods continue to fight? Why did they ignore the cries and pleas of their suffering subjects? Had Ultima Eden and the Savage God forsaken the world? Or were they simply bored with their unchanging realm?

"Chaos and Order... don't mess with me," Mama clenched her fist. "Never again. I will not let anyone take my family away from me."

She gazed at us with fiery determination in her eyes. "Cleo, Celli. As long we're together, we will survive, no matter what happens. Will you fight with Mama, together?"

Cleo, my sister nodded, "Yes, Mama. Cleo will do her best. Cleo will be so strong that Cleo can protect us!"

Yet despite their determination, I could only feel fear inside my chest. Become strong? Survive? What did they talk about?

"Why... must we fight?" I took a step back, trembling. Seeing how the war had caused pain and suffering, fear quickly ovecome me. "N-No, I don't wanna! I-I--"

The disappointment in their eyes stopped me. I knew they expected me to agree with them, but they were just delusional! We were just rural gods, trying our best to protect our few believers.

How can we hope to defeat the might of Ultima Eden and the Savage God?

Mama's hands trembled slightly as she reached out to hold mine. Her hand was cold when she looked deeply at my eyes.

"Celli," she began, "I understand that you're scared, but we can't give in to our fears. If we surrender to our fear, we'll lose everything."

I protested, "No, Mama don't understand!… Celli wants to be brave but Celli hates fighting and hurting someone! Celli just wants to live in peace with everyone."

"You're always been a kind child. Too kind," Mama sighed deeply, her gaze distant. She let go of my hand and said,

"But kindness isn't enough to protect what's important in your life. I had hoped that we could stand united as a family, but if you're not willing to fight, if you can't find the strength within you, then I don't understand how you could struggle in this life and find peace.

This world is cruel for the weak, Celli."

Her words pierced through my heart, and I felt a unbearable sense of guilt. Mother's disappointment at me crushed me.

"Mama... I..." Tears welled up in my eyes as I choked back my voice, barely managing to whisper, "I'm sorry, Mama. I'm so sorry…!"

Mama turned away and said, "We will move foward even without you."

I tried to reach her hand again, but suddenly guilt chained my hand down. As tears streamed down my face, I watched my mother walk away with Cleo.

I wiped away my tears and called out to them, "Wait! Mama, Cleo, please wait!"

But they didn't stop, leaving me alone. I look at my trembling hand and cried so hard, realizing the price of my cowardice.

That day I wasn't just lost, my father. That day, I lost my place in my family. The warmth i had always felt was gone, replaced by a cold, hollow emptiness.

I stood in the rain, realizing the ultimate price for my cowardice.