BONUS CHAPTER
Part 1
1 Year Later
I couldn’t sleep. I mean, how could I? Saying tomorrow is a big day would be an understatement. There was too much on my mind for me to fall asleep, even with how tired I was.
To take my mind off things, I stepped outside and sat on the bench swing we have on our porch while watching the occasional few cars drive by my house.
After a while, I heard the front door open. I turned my attention to the door and saw Hailee, my little sister, standing by the door.
“What are you doing here? Go back inside.”
“What are you doing here?” she asked back at me.
“I just needed a little fresh air to take my mind off things. Now go inside!”
“Well, it just so happened that I need to take my mind off things too.” she said, walking over and taking a seat right next to me on the bench swing.
“Who said you could sit here?”
“Shut up, you don’t own the bench.”
“Fine, sit here all you want. Just don’t bother me.”
“Me bother you? If anything, you better not bother me.”
For some time, we both sat quietly next to each other, admiring the atmosphere. I just planned to step outside for one or two minutes and go back in, but since she’s here now I guess I’m forced to stay a bit longer than I originally planned. I wondered what was on her mind for her to come outside too.
“So what’s been on your mind?” I finally asked, breaking the silence.
“That doesn’t matter. More importantly, are you ready for your big game tomorrow?”
Playing my first season of college hockey, my team and I somehow miraculously made it to the finals. Tomorrow is the big day, and to be honest, I’ve never been more nervous for a hockey game in my life.
“Of course I’m ready. I’ll kill it tomorrow!” I said confidently.
“I’ll be watching with my friends. You better not embarrass me, okay?” she said jokingly.
“I’ll try not to embarrass you too hard.”
“I expect nothing less than 5 goals from you tomorrow.”
“5 goals??? You’re crazy.”
I’ve already come this far with my team, and I know I may never have an opportunity like this again. Because of that, I’ll have to try my best not only for Hailee, but for everyone else who’s supported me along the way too.
“Hockey isn’t the only thing on your mind, isn’t it?’ Hailee suddenly asked.
“What?”
“You know exactly what I’m talking about. Tomorrow marks exactly one year after she left.”
“Okay, and?”
“Don’t act like it’s not bothering you.”
She wasn’t wrong. It’s been bothering me this whole time and it hasn’t left my mind for a week. I know it’s stupid to care about one year anniversaries for shit like that, but I just can’t help it. Damn, when did she become so perceptive?
“That’s what you really came out here to think about, isn’t it?” she began again.
“Nooo idea what you’re talking about. Didn’t even know that was tomorrow,” I lied. “Who keeps track of stupid things like that anyway?”
“You seriously couldn’t be more obvious,” she sighed. “It’s been impacting you and I could tell. Not only this week, but ever since back then.”
“What do you mean?”
“I don’t know. For a long time last year, you just had this sort of… spark to you which I’ve never seen before from you. You looked a lot happier. When she left, it felt as if that part of you left too. Jeez, just what did this girl do to do you?”
“I don’t know.”
“Of course you don’t,” she sighed. “I thought you would’ve gotten over her after a whole year, but God you're pathetic.”
“Shut up, I am over her.”
“Are you?”
“This isn’t the first time something like this has happened to me. I’ve always just put it in the back of my mind and moved on. I don’t see how this time is any different. You’re making a big deal out of nothing. Don’t worry about me.”
“Am I not allowed to worry about my brother?”
“Aww, you care about me this much?” I teased.
“Shut up. Don’t let it get to your head,” she laughed.
Shortly after, we grew silent again while staring at the nearly full moon in the sky. Since we’re both so busy with our own lives now, it’s been a while since I’ve been able to properly talk to her like this. This past year it’s felt as if she was more of a roommate than my sister. I knew I was partially to blame for that as I was constantly busy. I guess in this one year she’s grown a lot more mature without me even knowing it.
“Do you think I’ll ever be able to see her again?” I asked. “Just asking out of curiosity, of course.”
“Well, did she ever say if she was ever gonna visit back or not?”
“Yeah, but that doesn’t mean I’m gonna see her even if she does come back.”
“I see what you mean. Well, I think if fate decides so, life will somehow bring you two together again.”
“Fate, huh?”
“But if you don’t see her ever again, then that just means there’s someone even better out there you’ve yet to meet or waiting for their turn. I’m sure a super hot supermodel is just waiting for you to meet her and marry you.”
“Supermodel? How shallow do you think I am? Looks aren’t the only thing that matters to me” I said jokingly.
“Oh really? That’s not the reason you like her?”
“W-what?? I didn’t even like her, stupid. We were just good friends!” I said as I felt my face start to slightly heat up.
“Just good friends? So she’s just a good friend that you just happen to can’t stop thinking about even after a whole year?” she smirked, clearly amused by the situation.
“Shut up! If one of my best friends just left like that, of course I’d be sad. Also, I already told you that I quit thinking about her long ago!”
“Keep lying to yourself all you want, Johnny,” she said, still smiling. “Seriously though, if you’re feeling too lonely without her, just know you have me and all your other friends here with you still.”
“You don’t have to worry about me, I’ll be fine,” I reassured.
“Alright, whatever you say. I’m going back inside now,” she said, getting up from her seat.
“Hey, Hailee!” I said right as she was entering the house. “Thanks.”
She turned around and smiled back at me. “No need to thank me. It’s the least I could do for you after helping me out before.”
That’s right. A few months ago, Hailee was going through a breakup with her boyfriend at the time and I had to spend countless hours trying to cheer her up.
“Turns out you’re not so bad of a sister sometimes after all,” I said quietly as she was walking back into the house.
“You wanna repeat that again louder?” she asked, clearly hearing what I said.
“Repeat what?”
Part 2
I fucked it up. Bad. In our biggest game of the year, I went and ruined it for everyone.
We miraculously made it to overtime after overcoming a two goal deficit. The momentum was all on our side. I was able to get past the defencemen for a one-on-one with the goalie. All I had to do was get it past him and we’d be national champions. He was leaving his glove side, the top left corner, clearly open and was practically giving me a free goal. I shot the puck, and of course it goes right over the crossbar. That eventually lead to a turnover and the other team brought it up and scored. That was it. Game over.
Just from one unlucky missed shot, I blew the whole game and let down my whole team. More than that, I let down my whole school and everyone supporting us.
All that hard work my team and I put in, only for that to happen. Of course that’s how it’d play out.
We were all sitting in the locker room thinking about what the hell just happened. None of us felt like talking and it was as silent as detention with the really strict teacher at school. None of us could talk. We were all too stunned to say anything. When you have that much momentum built up and are that close to winning it all, just to lose it all in a matter of seconds, was too much for any of us to swallow. We all just sat in silence, not even bothering to take off our gear.
“How fucking pathetic can we get?” our team captain, Austin finally stepped up, finally breaking the long silence. “We can’t just sit here dead silent, dwelling on the game that just happened. That’s in the past now and we can’t do anything about it anymore except learn from it. We all gotta pick ourselves back up and move on.”
If the loss was this hard on me, I could only imagine how bad it is for Austin. This was only my first year of playing and I’ve got a whole future ahead of me. Meanwhile, Austin’s a senior and may never get a chance to play ever again. As a leader, he’s trying to act strong and make everyone else feel better, but I could tell he’s just as mad as everyone else here.
When me and the other rookies, Chase and Wilson, first came he was the first one to welcome us and make us feel like part of the team. College hockey turned out to be a completely different beast than high school hockey. The players got more physical, were more skilled, and were just generally smarter about the game. I went from being a point-per-game player in high school to barely being able to get a point every other game in college. The first few games especially were really tough for me, as I hadn’t been able to get much done at all. Austin noticed this and helped me adapt to play against the older and harder opponents. Ever since then, I had been doing much better. I owe him my whole career, and in return, I ruined his chance to win it all. Fuck.
“How do you suppose we do that?” somebody else said after Austin’s short speech.
“We pick ourselves back up and work harder than ever to achieve our goal, whatever that is. But for now, we need to let loose a bit and have some fun. Tonight, we party!”
The whole room roared in excitement at the sound of that. We all rarely get to go to parties since we’re all always busy with our own things so I can see why everyone’s so excited. However, I am far from excited by his idea. I already tried something like this last year, and we all know how that ended… What I needed was to go home and relax a bit.
Small chitter-chatter between everyone started to emerge and the room seemed a lot more lively now.
“What time are you showing up?” Wilson asked me.
Coming into the team at first, I knew nobody except Chase and Wilson. We all came from the same high school and played on the same team, and coincidentally we were also the only three freshmen to join the team this year. Because of this, we all got closer than ever before.
This content has been unlawfully taken from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.
“You guys go ahead and have fun. I’m gonna pass on this one. Don’t really feel like going out today,” I told him.
“Why not? We’re on break now and the season’s over now. Let’s have a bit of fun,” Chase joined in.
“You guys go ahead. I’d really rather just go home and relax. Besides, I don’t feel like I should be partying, especially with that last shot-”
“You hear that Austin!” Wilson called out to Austin, interrupting me. “Johnny says he’s not coming to the party.”
“Snitch,” I said quietly to a smirking Wilson.
Austin then stopped talking to whoever he was talking to before and turned his attention to me. “Really? How come?”
“I don’t know. I’m not really in the mood for it,” I answered honestly.
“Don’t let that last play bring you down. You played well the whole game. Besides, I feel bad that I’ve been working you boys hard the whole season to the point where you’ve barely been able to have any fun at all. How many college parties have you already been to?”
“None.”
“Great, then tonight’ll be your first.”
“Parties aren’t really my thing, I think I should just sit this one out.”
“You’re really going to do that to me after everything? This is probably gonna be my last chance to see you before I graduate and you’re gonna just going to say you don’t want to see me ever again in your life, and you’re going to give up your last chance of seeing me just to get a few hours of alone time at home doing God knows what, and-”
“Okay, shut up! I’ll go, fine. Just shut up,” I agreed reluctantly.
Austin’s expression suddenly changed into a smile. “Great, I’ll text you the address and time later. Be there!”
I turned back to Wilson and Chase to see them smiling as well.
“I heard Will, Rebekah, and Alyssa will be there too, so that’s a plus,” Chase said.
“Don’t worry, it won’t be like last year’s party,” Wilson assured. “She’s not here anymore so you can start focusing on other girls too now.”
Part 3
Chase was right. As soon as I entered the door I was bombarded with questions by Will asking “what the hell is THE Johnny doing at a party?” and “am I dreaming? This needs to be a dream. Johnny at a party? HA.”
To be fair, I was just as surprised as he was. As soon as I left my car door, I instantly asked myself “What am I even doing here?'
Apparently, the party was hosted by some rich senior that’s graduating soon, so he feels like he could do whatever the fuck he wants now. Either way, the house was HUGE and I could probably get lost in it if I got too deep into the house.
It didn’t take me too long to find Wilson, Chase, Austin, and most of the other guys from the hockey team. They were all gathered together and hanging by the open area near the huge kitchen. It was quite obvious that most of them were already piss drunk.
“Heyyyyy Johnnyyyyy, you made it!” Wilson slurred loudly and obnoxiously, bringing everyone else’s attention over to me. They took the time to greet me drunkenly before going back to doing what they were doing before.
“Johnny!” Austin greeted me, who I could tell was slightly less drunk than everyone else. “Glad you came!! Ready to have some fun?!”
“I’m driving back tonight so I’ll have to control myself. I’ll just stick with Will for now. I’m sure I’ll see you around later though,” I said, making an excuse to not ruin my night by trying to control a bunch of drunk idiots.
“Really? That’s a shame. Guess I’ll see you around later then,” he said before starting a conversation with some random girl.
“You’re really leaving me to take care of these idiots myself?” I heard Chase say behind me. I turned around to see Chase, completely sober and smiling.
“You’re not drinking tonight?”
“Designated driving,” he said, holding up his car keys.
“Oh…. I am sooo sorry. Seriously, I pray for you,” I told him, knowing just how wild some of them get when drunk.
“Thanks, I’m reallyyyy going to need it.” He then looks to my left and sees Will standing right next to me. “Oh, hey Will!”
“Chase,” he nodded slightly to greet him back.
“How’s Rebekah?”
“How’s Alyssa?”
Shit, I almost forgot. A little while after I introduced Chase to Alyssa and the rest of my friends, they somehow started dating. How this happened, I have no fucking clue. I tried asking about it to them a couple of times, but the only response I would get from either of them is “stuff happened.” It’s great to see them together, though. They’re both great people who deserve someone equally as good, and I believe that’s exactly what they have now. They both seem happy, so I’m not against it.
“I asked first,” Chase replied jokingly.
“Fine. She’s… a pain in the ass, honestly. But I still love her, so I guess I’m stuck with her for a little longer.”
“Yeah, I completely get what you mean. Last week, Alyssa-,” Chase started, before moving in closer to Will and whispering something to him, causing them both to laugh.
Will then proceeded to whisper something to Chase and they both started laughing again. For fuck’s sake, I didn’t know I was talking with middle school girls.
They continued this for a bit until they finally moved away from each other.
“Okay that’s enough for now,” Chase said. “I don’t want to make Johnny feel too bad about being single.”
“Shut up.”
“Kidding, don’t get angry.”
“Shut up, I’m not angry. By the way, Wilson said Alyssa was coming here tonight, right? Where is she anyway?”
“I don’t know. We saw each other earlier here but we decided to split up for a bit since I have to look over those idiots,” he said, looking at the lot of drunk dudes continuing to do stupid shit, “She’s probably hooking up with another guy. WAIT- DON’T TELL HER I SAID THAT.”
“I’m calling her right now,” I teased, pretending to grab my phone out of my pocket.
“Shut up, we all know you won’t do it,” Chase said. “Oh yeah, where’s Rebekah, Will? I heard she’s supposed to be here tonight too.”
“She said she was gonna catch up with a friend tonight and just wandered off somewhere.”
Out of nowhere, everyone started screaming and gathering in a circle, gaining the attention of everyone around. We got closer and saw that one of the drunk guys on the team picked up a super expensive vase and started lifting it up and down like an idiot, pretending it was the Stanley Cup or some shit.
“NO! DON’T TOUCH THAT!! PUT THAT DOWN RIGHT NOW!” Chase tried yelling at him, pushing his way into the circle. “Fuck, I gotta go back to babysitting now. I’ll talk to you guys later,” he directed back at us.
“Yeah, we’ll see you later. Have fun!”
Part 4
Thank God for Chase. If it weren’t for him, I’d be the one in his position right now, babysitting a whole drunk hockey team while my night is slowly being ruined. I’ll remember to thank him later.
Now that hanging with the team is out of the question, I guess my only option was to stick with Will and maybe meet some new people for the rest of the night until I went home. Maybe I’ll run into Alyssa or even Rebekah later after she’s done ‘catching up with a friend.’
“You’re not drinking tonight?” I asked Will.
“Nah, I’ve been trying to cut down recently. Besides, I’d feel bad for making you watch over me while I’m drunk.”
“Let loose, have a little fun! Our break won’t last forever.”
“You’re telling me this? The same person who refused to come to a single party with me the whole year because he wanted to ‘concentrate on other things’ or ‘was too busy’? What made you even come out to this one today anyway?”
“Austin was all like ‘oh this is my last chance to see you and you’re just gonna stay at home?” and ‘I’m never gonna see you ever again so you better come out to this party.’”
“So much for that. He’s probably too drunk to remember tonight two days from now anyway,” he said, getting a laugh out of both of us.
“I also wanted to get some stuff off my mind. That’s another reason why I decided to come tonight. I thought this would be a better way to do it than to stay at home and play video games or watch shows.”
“Ahh, that last shot right?”
“You were at the game?”
“Of course I was at the game. Our school made it to the Div 1 Championship and it was on home ice! Besides, I had to cheer on my good pal Johnny.”
“I feel bad now. You came all the way to see me play and I let you down. I’ll have to repay you somehow,” I said jokingly.
“Don’t worry about it. I’m sure you’ll have plenty of other opportunities in the future. You’ll repay me when you actually win it all,” he said, slapping my back.
“Hate to break it to you, but probably not gonna happen. The opportunity we got this year was once-in-a-lifetime. This is as far as we’re gonna get.”
“Don’t be such a negative Nancy! You have 3 whole years ahead of you. I doubt you won’t make it back here again considering your talent.”
“Thanks, but I think you’re overrating me a bit too much. This is college players we’re talking about. Some of these guys go into the NHL.”
Just as I finished my sentence, my eyes were met with two girls’ about 20 feet away. I easily identified the one on the right as Rebekah.
Holy shit! The other girl. It was Xela.
No, that’s impossible. She should be in Toronto right now. If she was visiting, news would’ve gotten out that she’s back. How come I’ve heard nothing about this? This has to be a crazy similar look-alike. Xela’s doppelganger.
The more I look at her though, the more I doubt that possibility. Every feature looks identical to her. She looks exactly the same as she did a year ago. That’s her.
I look to my side and see Will smiling. “Things are starting to get interesting now,” he said.
Don’t tell me he knew all along.
As they started getting closer, I could feel my heart beat faster and feel myself getting increasingly nervous. Why the fuck am I so nervous?
They kept walking forward until they closed the distance to around 5 feet. For the first time in a year, Xela and I were seeing each other eye-to-eye.
For a few seconds at first, we all just stood in silence with Xela and I looking at each other and the other two looking at us.
“Hi,” I finally managed to let out.
“Hi.”
“It’s been a while.”
“Yeah, around a year now I think,” she replied. I could tell she was just as nervous as I was.
To our sides I could hear Will and Rebekah silently arguing, trying their best for us not to hear them. However, that wasn’t working too well for them.
“Come on, let’s give them their privacy. Let’s go,” Rebekah told Will.
“But this is too funny. I need to stay for this.”
“Shut up. We’re leaving. Now.”
“Fine,” he reluctantly agreed.
They whispered a bit more stuff to each other quietly, before Rebekah started to talk normally again. “Wow, I’m really thirsty. Let’s go get some juice from the kitchen, Will,” Rebekah said, making her voice loud enough so Xela and I could hear. She then started walking away, dragging Will along with him to the kitchen.
“Those two seem to be doing well,” Xela said with a smile as we watched them walk away together.
“Yeah, they’re really good for each other.”
“Looks like we accomplished our goal then.”
“Yeah, we did,” I said. “All of our hard work really paid off it looks like. That fake love calculator, the movie date set-up, the Valentine’s Day plan, all the hours we spent at Filip’s Cafe trying to find the best way to get them together. It all paid off in the end.”
“I guess it did. In the end, all of it was worth it if it meant us getting to see them happy together like this. A lot of other good things came out from it too.”
“For one, we met.”
“Now is that necessarily a good thing to come out of it?” she joked.
“Of course. The best thing that’s ever happened to your life.”
“Ehh, debatable. There have been some pretty good things that have happened in my life.”
“Nothing that comes even close though.”
“Don’t get so full of yourself,” she laughed.
Just like that, Xela and I were back to talking like normal, as if no time had passed between us. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss this.
Suddenly, the music completely stopped and everyone went silent. We all turned our heads to the DJ who was adjusting the microphone connected to his set-up.
“Alright guys, I wanna see everyone dancing for this song. I’m going full blast, so it’s about to get wild in here,” the DJ said, to which everyone cheered.
We were then hit by full blast SICKO MODE and a bunch of yelling coming from all different directions. Around us, everyone was going batshit crazy and borderline destroying the house. Mosh pits were forming, people were climbing on top of one another, and I think I even saw some girl strip completely naked.
With the full blast SICKO MODE and all the screaming combined, I could already tell my ears wouldn’t stop ringing for a very long time after this was over.
“FUCK, IT’S LOUD,” I tried yelling to get Xela to hear me.
“WHAT?? I CAN’T HEAR YOU,” she tried yelling back.
“NEVER MIND.”
“OKAY.”
She then yelled something I couldn’t hear because of the volume. Jesus Christ, how much longer is this song?
“WHAT???” I yelled, asking her to repeat herself.
“I KNOW A QUIETER PLACE WE CAN GO.”
“QUIETER PLACE? OKAY, LEAD THE WAY.”
She then proceeded to grab my hand and lead me through all the hoards of people everywhere. She guided me up the stairs and through a pair of doors that led to a surprisingly unoccupied little balcony area.
We quickly let go of each other’s hands and shut the door behind us. Xela and I both rested our arms on the railing and looked into the distance. There wasn’t much to look at, but the sky was undeniably pretty tonight. It happened to be a full moon with plenty of stars in the sky too.
For a long time, we kept standing next to each other in silence, looking at the sky, with the muffled sound of music from the party playing the in the back. Neither one of us said a word and instead waited for the other person to say something first or think of something to say to break the awkward tension. I honestly didn’t mind though. Looking at the stars with her next to me was good enough for me.
“I saw your game today,” she said, breaking the silence.
“You were there?”
“Of course I was there. A big hockey game was happening in my hometown, obviously I’d be there.”
“Did you see the shot?”
“Yeah, I saw the shot.”
“I did it again. Last year, when my team needed me the most, I failed to deliver. This year, my one mistake was the whole reason we lost.”
“Stop being such a drama queen, that one shot wasn’t the whole reason you lost. Don’t let that one shot dictate your whole performance that game. Other than that shot, you played really well. Your defence became much better, you got much smarter with the puck, your skating got a lot better, and of course, your hands and passing were as good as ever. Honestly, I was pretty impressed,” she said. By the look on her face, I could tell she was being completely serious and wasn’t just saying that to make me feel better. “You could still work on your shot a little bit though.”
“Shut up.”
Xela was quite the player herself. She played on the girls’ team from middle school through eleventh grade and was consistently one of the best players every year. She decided to quit in twelfth grade though, as she wanted to focus more on school.
“Oh well, you still have 3 more years to not fuck up as bad as you did this year,” she said, directing her attention back to the night sky.
I did the same and looked back into the sky.
“I don’t know about that. I was thinking of quitting after this year.”
“What? Why?”
“I don’t know, it’s way too much to handle on top of school. School’s already pretty hectic as it is, and hockey’s been taking up even more of my time. My future isn’t gonna revolve around hockey, anyway. It’s always been something I’ve just done for fun. I guess I gotta focus more on my future now.”
“Hmm,” she muttered, giving a look of disagreement.
“You can’t give me shit about it, you did the same thing.”
“I know, I know. If that’s really what you want, I can’t stop you. Just know you probably won’t ever get a chance to play any competitive hockey ever again.”
“I’ve already thought about that. That’s fine with me.”
“If you say so,” she said. That was the end of that conversation. Shortly after, we went back to what we were doing before, looking blankly at the sky.