The brakes of the Paulie's Pillows truck grinds as it slows to a stop at a red light. After it stops, there is a series of rapid bangs that get louder and harder with each passing second, causing the trailer to vibrate and the doors to bend. Hazard lights turn on in the truck’s lights, and the driver, an old rabbit with gray fur and heavy glasses, hurries to the trailer, and swears and stumbles back when the trailer’s door breaks open. Pillows fall out as Jayson stumbles out and falls on the road with numerous pillows following him. Jayson is clutching his cosmic wood sword, and he is covered in soot and blood.
“What the hell? Where did you come from?” says the driver irritably.
“The sky,” says Jayson.
The driver looks up at the cracked sky, and then at Jayson.
“No, you didn’t,” says the driver.
“Feel free not to believe me,” says Jayson as he throws the pillows back in the trailer. When the last of the pillows are back inside, he closes the bent doors, and then goes to a nearby tree, breaks off a branch and slides it between the door handles. After that, he walks away, leaving the driver confused.
“Uh... Thanks?” says the driver.
“No problem,” says Jayson, giving a short farewell wave without looking at him.
Jayson continues walking, and the truck drives away. As Jayson walks, he sees a two story, brick building with dirty windows and a faded mural of a muscular badger lifting two tons of weights. The sign says: BIG BODY BUDDY GYM. It also has a "For Sale" sign taped to the window. But the best part is that it is on his side, so he doesn’t have to worry about Lexia blowing him up with a rocket again.
Jayson inspects himself, noting the caked-on blood mixing with the grime of hobo life, and when he sniffs himself, he recoils with a wrinkled nose. He quickens his steps, leaving a trail of wretched smells of rot, sweat and broken dreams. He goes through the Big Body Buddy Gym door and looks around at the old wooden interior with failing lights. It has everything a gym needs: wrestling ring (in use), lines of weights (in use), yoga mats (in use), and tables, couches, and chairs (in use with gym members taking breathers). It doesn't take Jayson long to see Rolland (on a couch) with Dacre, Cyrus, and Shae at a table playing Uno. They don't notice him, and Jayson doesn't care.
He goes straight to the complimentary showers, turns on the hot water at full blast and steps inside, clothes and all. The water cascading off of him immediately turns into a sludge of brown, black, green, red, and orange. Gym goers stare at Jayson with a mix of curiosity and disgust, as bubbles from their soap and steam from their showers strategically cover their male reproductive organs. The ones closest to Jayson move away from him as the sludge spreads and dirty speckles fly from the impacts of the hot water.
Jayson uses his fingers to claw out the gunk in his hair and scrape out the filth in his fabric, and when he is done, he shuts off the water and turns on a giant air dryer built into the wall. The hot air blows off the excess water (leading to more discolored liquid to seep off him), and leaves his clothes crust on the outside and damp on the inside while his hair and fur are frazzled. But he exits feeling satisfied, despite the area he was in being an oasis of leftover filth.
When Jayson is in the gym lobby, he takes a deep breath, and starts heading towards the exit, but abruptly stops when he hears Rolland yelling out to him.
“Oi! What are you doing here, Hobo!?”
Jayson looks to the side and sees Rolland and his group glaring at him, their Uno cards still in hand.
“I had to take a shower. But don’t worry, I’m going home now,” says Jayson.
“Home? You ain’t got a burrow. You’re a hobo,” says Rolland.
“Home is where the heart is.”
“Says the heartless rabbit.”
“Rich coming from the guy who breaks hearts.”
Rolland slams his cards into a block and sets them on the table, glaring at Jayson.
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“You know this is our turf, right? And Mama Bear put a bounty on you,” says Rolland.
“Well, here I am. Come get your bounty,” says Jayson.
Rolland narrows his eyes while Jayson approaches the group. The group puts their cards down, and when Jayson is a few steps away, the thugs surround him, and Rolland glares at him while the others crack their knuckles or roll their necks.
“Are you going to go for it? Or are you going to give me twenty bucks?” says Jayson.
“How about we gun you down right here, right now?” says Rolland.
Jayson rubs his wooden sword’s hilt. “Well, for starters, blood on the floor is not good. It is a pain in the ass to clean. You might as well replace the flooring. And a non-natural death can lower your property value anywhere from 10 to 25%, not including the difficulty you would get selling the place due to the stigma that comes with murder properties. Then there's your afternoon being ruined where you have to transport my body to an appropriate area, dig a hole at least six feet deep, and then drop my body in said hole. Then cover the hole in such a way that the area looks undisturbed. On top of that, you need to make sure your witnesses are on the same page, and then it gets really tedious because you have to keep an eye on them and then one or more of your friends might snitch on you if they get pissed off enough. Giving me twenty bucks will be easier for all of us.”
“I got a better idea. How about we take you to Ramsey and have him slit your throat and then put your body in a vat of acid and bury you somewhere in the desert?” says Rolland.
Jayson arches a brow. “Who's Ramsey?”
“None of your business.”
“Oh, well, fine then. I'll just leave then.”
Jayson turns to leave, but Cyrus and Shae block him, and Rolland wags his finger at the Hobo.
“You’re not going anywhere. You gotta pay for the other night, and all the other nights. You've been a pain in the ass ever since you came from God knows where, and we're going to take care of this right now!”
Dacre raises his suppressed pistol. In a flash, the world dims. Jayson disarms Dacre and slams him into the table, shattering it. Then Cyrus and Shae rush Jayson, and he draws his cosmic wood sword at blinding speed. He is surrounded in the faint aura and with time slowing down, he proceeds to disarm and viciously beat down Cyrus and Shae with intense speed. During the chaos, Cyrus is thrown into the floor and Shae is kicked into the wall. When Dacre gets up and attempts to shoot Jayson again, he is whacked out the window with a sonic boom that rattles the gym.
People scream and scatter, their bodies mere silhouettes in the darkness, and the Specter watches from the scene unfold as Jayson turns to Rolland. His narrowed eyes focus on the thug, and as he marches forward, Rolland draws his pistol, but Jayson snatches a water bottle from a table and throws it at him, striking him in the face and causing him to miss his shot.
Jayson then charges and with a loud yell, he whacks Rolland across the gym, creating a dust and debris cloud when he hits the wall.
The dust settles several seconds later, revealing Rolland to be stuck in the wall. The world brightens immediately after, and Jayson smiles and walks away with his cosmic wood sword resting against his shoulder, and Rolland glares at Jayson from the wall, bloodied and bruised and eyes pulsing with pure rage.
“One day I'll get you, Hobo… One day,” says Rolland.
Meanwhile, outside in the pleasant sunshine and warm breeze, Jayson walks past Dacre’s unconscious and bloodied form and disappears into the alley. Several seconds later, Mortimer rounds the corner, wearing his raccoon mask, and he sees Dacre on the sidewalk, surrounded by glass and splintered wood.
“You gotta be kidding me,” grumbles Mortimer.
He enters the gym and sees the others knocked out and Rolland stuck in the wall. Mortimer runs up to Rolland and pulls him out. With his body now free, Rolland staggers and uses the fox for support as he winces and clutches his gut.
“Alright, spill it. What happened here?” says Mortimer.
“The Hobo came by to take a shower and beat us all up for no reason,” says Rolland. Then he realizes Mortimer is wearing a raccoon mask, and his brows scrunch. “Okay, what’s with the mask?”
“I need it. Can you walk?” replies Mortimer.
“If you inject me with something or let me snort something, then yeah.”
“Good. Wake up your gang. We're going after the Hobo Warrior Bunny.”
“How? He's practically demonic.”
“Simple. We overwhelm him, then kill him. Then we'll do the same for Bazooka Bunny.”
Rolland rolls his eyes. “Oh wow. Such a brilliant, glorious plan. How could we have never thought of such a wonderful, flawless plan? You must have the IQ of a god!”
Mortimer grabs Rolland by the neck and slams him into the wall, making the rabbit wince again.
“Rolland, don't start with me,” snarls Mortimer, pointing at his nose with his claw. “Get your group, have them get their friends, and meet me... Where's a good place to meet?”
“The Toxic War monument on Sixth Street,” says Rolland.
“Good. Meet me there in four hours. That should be more than enough time to get everyone. Then we're going to get the Hobo Warrior Bunny.”
“How? Do you have specifics besides mob him?”
Mortimer releases Rolland and smiles proudly behind his mask while clasping the flaps of his jacket, all while Rolland rubs his neck and glares at the fox.
“Ah, allow me to explain my plan in great detail,” says Mortimer. “You see, the first thing we do is-”