When Sparrow woke, he was shivering. Although he wasn't sure whether it was from the cold or from all the injuries he'd received. His lip was twice the size it used to be. His nose was broken at an awkward angle and his hands were bubbled and seared from the heat.
He climbed gingerly to his feet and slid on his robe over his aching shoulders and ribs. The clock sat there in his pocket, almost grinning at him. Sparrow gave a long sigh. He couldn't even grab the stupid thing to throw it away. His hands were too blistered. Carefully, he began to limp along the side of the mountain.
For the next two weeks, Sparrow had to use his teeth and feet as his hands. He dug for roots with his feet and then held them between his teeth as he walked along. When he needed to eat, he'd munch the roots raw.
His hands were far too painful and singed to start fires. He grew thinner and weaker. Along the way, he saw plenty of small mountain deer and goats, and even a type of mountain antelope as well as fish, turtles and rabbits, but all of them were beyond his abilities to catch.
He slept in caves or under trees, with his palms pressed into snow, or icy water. Eventually, one by one, the blisters began to pop. And he was able to use two fingers and then three fingers and then four fingers and then suddenly, both hands became able to be used and as soon as that happened Sparrow began abusing the alarm clock to his fullest extent. He'd grab rocks, smash them against its glass face over and over again. He'd crush it between boulders, throw it off the edge of a cliff, burn it with fire from his hands.
The stoic little alarm clock didn't seem to mind that much. Every time he threw it away or burnt it or left it behind. The alarm clock would reappear in his pocket, good as new. Eventually, as they made it through a massive pass and into mountain foothills lined by ash and yew and oak and pine he began to accept that the alarm clock was stuck with him.
Sparrow thought about how the cultivator had been crushing the alarm clock under his foot.
'How come he managed to get rid of you?' Sparrow asked the alarm clock. 'Why did I end up with the misfortune of owning you?'
But for once the alarm clock was silent.
Eventually, Sparrow began to settle into the little alarm clock’s routines of yelling 'AVALANCHE' five minutes after an avalanche had happened, or calling out DANGER to him in ways that generally put Sparrow in even more danger than he would have been. His brain began to block out the sound of the alarm clock until the alarm clock only slightly bothered him.
****
It was one day while Sparrow was travelling alongside a river in the leafy pine-covered foothills that he came across a group of three brothers walking in the opposite direction.
The two older brothers were obviously cultivators - they wore black robes and amulets around their necks. They also walked with a kind of swagger designed to let everyone know they were important.
The younger one wore normal clothes and didn’t work with the same swagger. His eyes were constantly staring around.
Sparrow nodded to the brothers and then tried to keep walking. He didn’t want to hang around the cultivators too long with the alarm clock in his pocket.
But the oldest brother stepped out in front of him.
‘My, my, what do we have here?’The older brother folded his arms, ‘A beggar or a swine herder?’
Sparrow swallowed, he ran his finger along the alarm clock in his pocket, ‘Just a traveller - one who’s keen to keep moving.’
‘Guys,’ the youngest brother said, ‘Why don’t we keep going, he clear-’
The oldest turned and glared at the youngest, ‘Not now Runt.’
Sparrow saw his chance and started to walk off, a hand grabbed his shoulder.
‘Hey,’ the second oldest said, ‘We’re not finished with you.’
Sparrow raised his hand, fire rose and twisted around him, ‘Well I’m finished with you.’
The two brothers backed away a step. They had grins on their faces.
‘That’s more like it.’ The oldest said, ‘Time to put our new abilities to the test, aye Sala-O?’
The second oldest nodded, ‘Let’s kick his ass.’
The pair spun, creating a ripple of air between them that twisted and turned and formed into the shape of an air dragon. The beast let out a mighty roar that filled the forest. The brothers were sweating heavily.
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As they prepared to strike their foreheads wrinkled.
‘Hey, where’s he gone?’
A stick caught the second oldest across the side of his head, he slumped to the ground unconscious and the dragon between them disappeared.
The older brother twisted, staring at the air around him, hands raised, ready for an attack.
‘THREE CULTIVATORS APPROACHING STRAIGHT AHEAD. TWO OF THEM ARE POWERFUL BUT ARE LACKING INTELLIGENCE. THE YOUNGEST HAS POTENTIAL TO BE HARMFUL, BUT LACKS THE TRAINING TO BE A THREAT.’
Sparrow laughed, ‘You know clock, I think you’re developing a sense of humor.’
‘I ONLY SPEAK THE TRUTH.’
The older brother had formed a giant shield of fire around him. It pulsed with heat.
‘Where are you - coward?’ the older brother screamed.
An alarm clock hit him on the side of the head, breaking his concentration, his giant fire shield disappeared.
Sparrow appeared beside the youngest brother, who was sitting on a log, watching his older brothers being destroyed with a pained expression on his face.
‘Remember kid,’ Sparrow said, taking a seat on the log, ‘Sometimes it’s not about what you’ve got. Sometimes it’s about what you do with it.’
The older brother spotted Sparrow and let out an enraged scream. He began to craft a second giant air dragon. Sparrow just twisted his hand and the ground underneath the older cultivator began to burn. The young man danced from foot to foot as he tried to escape the heat.
With his other hand, Sparrow gestured to a branch above the older cultivator. The branch burnt through where it was attached to the tree and fell onto the older brother’s head. Knocking him stone cold.
Sparrow pulled out the alarm clock, which had returned to his pocket.
‘You still haven’t said anything about their attacks,’ Sparrow said to the clock.
‘THAT’S BECAUSE I ONLY DETECT THREATS.’
Sparrow laughed, ‘Oh man… you are on fire today.’
‘NO ACTUALLY, YOU’VE ONLY THROWN ME OFF A CLIFF TODAY - YOU HAVEN’T SET ME ON FIRE YET.’
Sparrow shoved the alarm clock back in his pocket, and then looked at the youngest brother who was sitting next to him.
‘You must think I’m crazy,’ Sparrow said, ‘Talking to my alarm clock.’
‘No.’ The youngest brother said, ‘I think you’re brilliant - the way you demolished those two idiots over there.’
There was the sound of cursing and sticks cracking as the two brothers woke from their concussions.
The youngest rubbed his neck, ‘So… You’re young - and you’re such a powerful cultivator. I’m on the same path,’ the boy held his hand above the ground and created a mini-tornado of leaves beneath his hand, ‘I can do some things with air, but I’m really unsure of myself. Do you have any…’ the boy shrugged, ‘...any tips?
Sparrow stared at the boy and saw a younger version of himself - scared, but eager to learn, ‘Sure, I won’t stay long, but I’ll put you on the right path. What I’d do is…’
A branch cracked to Sparrow’s left and he turned. From a bush the two older brothers peered at him through slowly swelling eyes. When they saw him staring, they turned away, but their ears were still pointed towards him.
Sparrow reached into his pocket - ‘Actually I’ll give you the secret to my strength.’ He pulled out the alarm clock. ‘You see this? This device tells me when attacks are on their way. For example, I'll be walking through a valley lost in my own head, and all of a sudden, the alarm clock will ring out and say five spearmen, three bowmen and two swordsmen approaching from your right, they're heavily armed with…’
Out of the corner of his eyes, Sparrow watched the two older brothers lean further and further forward.
‘Basically, this beautiful little device here will stop you from ever being ambushed and allow you to plan against your opponents ahead of time.’
The two older brothers pushed through the bushes and swatted the youngest brother out of their way.
'How much?' The oldest one said.
'Yeah, how much?’ said the second oldest, ‘We'd give you a beating for it if you weren't such a cheating piece of scum, using an alarm clock.’
Sparrow just smiled, 'Two gold coins.' The brothers started to complain. And Sparrow’s grin grew even wider, 'Each!' he said, 'Two gold coins each.'
The brothers’ jaws dropped and he could see the little cogs behind their eyes beginning to turn. With groans, they opened up their purses and took out every single coin. There was this musical sound of gold, silver and bronze clinking and eventually, the two boys ended up just a silver coin short of four gold coins. Sparrow smiled at them. 'That'll do.' and he handed over the alarm clock. 'Before you own it. You have to say these words,' Sparrow said, ‘I claim ownership of the Automatic Warner 3000 X.'
The two boys repeated the line and then grinned madly, 'We're going to be unstoppable.' The oldest ones said.
'We'll take down masters,' said the second one. 'No...Gods,' said the oldest. 'I've been meaning to kill a god for a little while.' Sparrow laughed as the pair wandered off into the forest discussing their plans. Then he turned to the youngest brother and shook his head 'You don't want that clock kid. It's more trouble than it's worth. I’ll give you advice though.’
Sparrow jerked his thumb to where the two brothers had disappeared, ‘Ditch them as soon as you get a chance. The Emperor of Dragon River has opened schools up to anyone. Find yourself a good school, pretend to be from a wealthy family and I’m sure your cultivation future will go far.’
The kid nodded, ‘You think?
‘I know. I haven’t been around long, but I’ve had a couple of good teachers. I’m sure you’ll find some in your travels.’
The little kid grinned and gave a bow. 'Thank you, sir.'
‘No problems,’ Sparrow said. 'And seriously - ditch those idiots.'
The kid nodded and Sparrow hoisted his jacket back onto his shoulders and walked off.
It was only when he'd spent an hour completely free of the alarm clock's usual interjections such as SHARP ROCK APPROACHING or SLIPPERY ICE that Sparrow began to laugh a laugh of relief, the laugh of a man who's managed to rid himself of his greatest pain.