Kristin sat in her usual spot on the couch in Sofia Kopf's office. She fidgeted with the hem of her T-shirt nervously, her eyes downcast trying not to look at her therapist. She had felt these nerves all week since that afternoon in the park, the term Darby had told her playing over and over in her mind. Dissociative Identity Disorder or DID for short. Kristin had talked to Darby about it for a while, and then when she got home had gone straight to the computer and looked it up on there. There had been so much contradictory information, and much of it she felt she couldn't trust, and so she had waited, thoughts churning all week, till her appointment with Sofia.
"What do you know of Dissociative Identity Disorder?" Sofia asked, snapping Kristin out of her thoughts.
"Um, it means that there's more than one person living in someone's head?" Kristin answered after a moment.
"It can certainly feel like that to someone with this condition. And do you know what causes it?" Sofia continued using her most calm tone of voice.
"I read that it comes from lots of trauma when you're a kid, but I don't remember anything like that," answered Kristin before continuing quieter, "I don't remember much of anything."
Sofia made some notes on her page as she continued to watch the nervous girl, this had been the first time she had admitted to her lack of childhood memory. Could this show some sign that she was beginning to realise that much more had happened in her life than what she was aware of?
The pair continued to discuss what Dissociative Identity Disorder meant and what kind of impacts it can have on a person. Kristin felt herself relaxing slightly as she came to understand what this condition entailed, only to have the anxiety come back as the next troubling thing was discussed. By the end of the appointment, she wasn't sure if this truly was what was going on with her, however, she did leave with more information than what she went in with.
As Kristin made her way home on the bus, she felt a presence sit next to her in her mind. She looked around to be sure there wasn't some physical reason for this feeling, only to realise the bus was mostly empty with only a couple of other passengers spread out through the seats. This presence didn't feel like the others she had experienced previously, it felt smaller as if she was in the presence of a child.
'The bus is fun,' said the presence from within Kristin's head.
'I guess it can be when there aren't heaps of people squashing you in,' Kristin responded finding it calming talking to this presence.
Kristin rode the bus the rest of the way like this, the small presence getting excited when they passed a cute animal or a picturesque location. For her part, Kristin would reply to the presence, which she had not gotten a name from, the same as she would with any child. She remembered Sofia saying that some of the identities that come with Dissociative Identity Disorder can be stuck as a child often due to them having experienced traumatic things, and she wondered if that was the case for this small presence.
The ride went on like this for some time until the bus stopped to pick up a new passenger. The passenger that got onto the bus was a tall, slightly overweight man, with shaggy dark hair that seemed to darken his face. He wore a long dark coloured coat and dark pants. Everything about this man, to Kristin, felt wrong, felt dark, and felt dangerous. She felt a feeling of panic rising from within her, the calming, childlike presence had fled and was replaced by something even smaller. This new presence felt like sheer terror, and as she felt herself slip back into the blackness all she could hear was someone screaming.
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Darby Hanson was sitting behind the counter at ShopMore, a variety retail store at the small shopping mall close by to the park she had met that curious girl at. The name badge pinned to her chest clearly noted her out to be an employee of the store, which was not readily apparent from the relaxed way she sat, feet propped up on the point of sale computer's tower. The day had been going slowly, although that was not really unusual. While the store might be called ShopMore, it was more or less the same people each day.
It had been some time since the last customer entered the store and so she pulled out her phone to relieve some of the boredom. Just as she was about to activate it the screen flashed with an incoming call. The name at the top of the screen was Kristin (Alex). They had exchanged phone numbers that afternoon last week when she had seen that curious girl again at the park. Darby had been wondering when she might get in contact, and so readily answered the phone.
"Took your sweet time calling me," she said trying to pull off a sarcastic annoyed tone.
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The voice that came through from the other side however was like neither of the two she had met so far. Where Alex's voice was slightly higher, it also had a strong quality to it. Darby could imagine Alex giving commands to people and expecting them to be completed. Kristin on the other hand had an ever so slightly lower voice, and it was softer as well like she was always making sure not to antagonise the person she was talking to. This voice however was like neither of those two, it was much smaller, quieter, and timider. It sounded like if it made much more noise it would fracture and crumble into dust.
"Umm, hello? Please don' be mad I call, Alex say you nice," said the voice in a speech pattern that resembled a small child.
Darby was unsure how to address this voice, clearly, it was an alter, or alternate state of consciousness, that was young and seemed scared. She had some experience with her friend's younger alters, however for the most part they had seemed like fairly happy kids.
"Uhh no worries kid, I'm not mad at all. What's wrong?" she asked hoping she could draw some more information from the alter.
"I scared and I dunno where I is," the alter replied with a quiver in their voice.
Darby realised that the quiver in the alter's voice must have meant they had been crying recently and given the increase in the quiver was about to cry again.
"That's okay," Darby replied while trying to retain a calming tone, "can you describe to me what's around you?"
"There trees, and I hear water, and I in a big tower," said the voice.
The only place that was like that nearby that Darby knew was the park. She couldn't put her finger on it but she felt compelled to help this alter, at least this would cure some of the boredom she had been feeling.
"Okay, I'm going to try to come and find you and then we can work this out. Okay, kid?" Darby said as she rose from her seat trying to see where her manager had gone.
Darby found her manager in the back office doing some paperwork and gave her the excuse that her mum was sick and needed her over right away. She hurried back to the counter pulled off her name pin, stashing it in the register, picked up her bag, and hurried out of the store.
She made good time getting to the park and set about locating the body that currently housed a tiny little voice. She hurried over to the play equipment that was styled like a castle. The castle itself, all the way to its upper walls, was about five or six meters tall. It had 3 layers of which the top was open to the sky and the bottom containing a dirt floor. Each layer was split up into several rooms and so Darby began to search them one by one.
As she neared one of the back rooms on the middle layer she could hear some quiet sobbing. Darby had to bend to fit on this floor, and so when she entered the room the girl she saw in the corner pulled herself into a tighter ball as if trying to meld into the shadows. Darby changed position and came in on her hands and knees, trying to make her appearance seem smaller and less threatening.
"Hi there," she said in her softest tone, "it's ok, I'm not going to hurt you."
The girl peeked over her knees as she lifted her head slightly at the sound of Darby's voice.
"You the nice lady Alex say?" said the girl, although Darby swore she heard in the voice an attempt to sound masculine.
"That's me, my name is Darby. What's yours?" she asked sitting down on the other side of the small room.
"I'm Ethan," said the girl, although Darby guessed currently she could assume this alter to be a boy.
"Well Ethan, it's very nice to meet you. What brought you in here?" Darby asked hoping she might be able to figure out how to help this small alter.
"There was scary and I run and I don' know where I am and found here and I hid and I just want to go home," Ethan said in a run-on sentence Darby thought would never end.
"I know where this park is, so if I know where your home is, I could help you find the way there," Darby said hoping Ethan would trust her enough for this, "would I be able to see the phone you called me on?"
Ethan handed her the phone and also helped her unlock it. Flipping through the apps on Kristin's phone, Darby quickly found the contacts app. Opening that up she found what she was looking for. Kristin had saved all her information into her contact card and so Darby now knew where to take Ethan home. She then pulled up the maps app and entered the address into it showing Ethan along the way.
"This way you will know we are going in the right direction and I'm not leading you off somewhere," Darby said hoping to forestall any issues along the way.
Darby then led him out of the small room and down to the ground floor. She held out her hand like she would any other small child however Ethan shied away from her seemingly afraid.
'Ok noted, this alter doesn't like physical touch,' she thought, making sure to keep some distance from Ethan as they walked.
Darby kept up a mostly one-sided conversation, making sure to keep all topics light. As Darby finished her latest joke, which involved some choice descriptions and a small amount of toilet humour, a small smile crept onto Ethan's face. Darby guessed it made sense and seemed to confirm her idea that Ethan was a boy.
As they rounded the last corner and entered the street Kristin lived on, Darby took in the houses in this area. Many were small one or two-story houses that seemed to stretch deep into their lots. Small gardens dotted the front of many houses, a couple wild and overgrown. As they passed each house Ethan's mood started to pick up as if he finally recognised where he was and was feeling more at home.
Eventually, they came to a stop outside a two-story house that looked like someone had thrown old-fashioned stone style and modern architectural practices into a blender and made a house out of the pieces that were left. There was a small garden at the front, primarily some grass and a small bed of flowers. The flower bed had obviously seen better days as Darby could notice weeds poking through that would soon start starving out the desired plants. She also noticed there was a medium-sized, blue sedan parked in the small driveway next to the house, indicating that someone must be home. Darby wondered who this girl, or rather currently boy, lived with.
She walked down the small path across the grass and headed for the heavy-looking blue door at the front of the house. Taking one last look at the boy next to her who seemed excited while also trying to be as small as possible, she took a breath and pressed the doorbell.