I stepped out of my apartment complex into a grey February sky. Small flakes of snow drifted down from the rooftops, occasionally swirling around in an aggressive fashion as they became trapped into the gusts of wind that shot between the buildings. A bite of cold nipped at my nose as I walked from my building to the awaiting car. As I approached, the door opened for me automatically as I stepped into the vehicle.
“Please give me your destination.” The car stated in a neutral robotic voice.
“Jerry’s Cafe, corner of 2nd and West Main Street downtown.”
“Very well sir, expected arrival will be 15 minutes with minimal traffic. Please let me know if you would like any music or news while you enjoy your ride.”
I sank back into my seat and buckled my seat belt, or at least I tried to. My hand was starting to shake, and I needed to guide it in with both hands before it would click in. Running my hands over my face, I drew in a deep long breath in an attempt to calm myself.
AI cars are safe. It’s the human drivers you need to worry about you idiot. Get a grip. While I have traveled by car dozens of times since my accident 6 years ago, I had left my apartment so rarely over the past 3, that the act of actually riding in a car was enough to make the hair stand up on the back of my neck. The best way I have ever been able to describe it was when my sister last came to visit me. I lived just outside the city back then, and she saw how on edge I was riding around with her in her vehicle. I told her it was the same feeling I used to have as a kid walking into the basement at our childhood home, the feeling that there is something there in the dark just… watching, waiting. But instead of being able to quickstep your way over the light switch, I’m just in a metal box without any escape. Back then she gave me some lip service about how she understood what I was saying, but it was clear she was just trying to be kind. Even though we were both involved in the same accident, she only suffered superficial physical injuries and she didn't share the same fears and stigmas after the fact. Though I would certainly never claim that she didn't still struggle with what happened, our experiences were just different, and in alot of ways, I'm glad I didn't have to go through what she did.
I struggled to push those thoughts from my mind as I watched the cityscape pass me by. The towers of downtown came closer and closer into view as the auto taxi brought me to my destination. It was hard to get used to just how large the city had become. While I didn’t grow up in Columbus, I did come to the city several times a year as a kid with my dad to watch the Blue Jackets play. It was always the one thing that we would do together, just the two of us. Between being a young boy falling in love with the sport of hockey, and now as an adult, the city's population has more than doubled due to it becoming the unofficial gaming capital of the United States. Just about every major video game producer and hardware company over the past 20 years has either founded or moved at least one of their US offices to Columbus. This of course also had the added effect of drawing in several other internet and technology-based start-ups, not to mention several production studios that specialized in producing made for streaming tv and movies. When the companies came in, the city grew tall and wide to match.
As the car approached the cafe, the skyline began to disappear, and I became swallowed by walls of concrete and glass on either side for several blocks. Traffic began to move slower, but still at a steady pass, courtesy of laws and regulations that came out in the past 5 years outlawing human drivers in major metropolitan areas. Further laws had been proposed to phase out human driving across the country, but Congress hadn’t been able to garner enough support to go that far, not after all the “radical” action that they needed to take over the past 10-15 years to help fight against the massive unemployment due to the world's steady march towards AI automation in the manufacturing, service, and driving industries. A basic Universal Healthcare and Income had been a hard pill for many to swallow across the country, though both programs quickly became popular across most social-economical lines. However, congress still struggled telling Average Joe’s and Jane’s that they were going to have to update or mothball their cars.
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“Maybe if they had just grown a pair and done what was right, everything could have been different,” I whispered to myself
“Playing ‘Grow a Pair’ by…”
“NO! Stop. No music. How much farther to my destination?”
“We will be two blocks away after the next street sir, 3 minutes total.”
“Just pull over after the next street. I’ll walk the rest of the way.”
The car expertly worked its way through two lanes of cars and pulled over onto the side of the road.
“Thank you for your patronage. Please have a wonderful day.”
The door to the car opened and I awkwardly pulled myself from the back seat on my good leg, and onto the street. With my cane in hand supporting my leg, I began to work my way the remaining two blocks south towards the restaurant. The site was quite beautiful. Low grey clouds and the city skyline with the Scioto River just across the street. It’s the type of sight that I rarely get to see anymore. A moment that would have once filled me with a sense of wonder or beauty… instead made me feel a bit sad. This wasn’t for me, not anymore. My life was a small apartment with a simple view of a nearly identical building outside a small window, not skyscrapers or bridges. Not rivers or ice rinks. I'd given up on seeing or doing anything different.
I took the next several minutes to pull my thoughts together as I walked the remaining two blocks. I cannot keep falling down the rabbit hole, not today. It’s bad enough that I haven’t actually seen Brian since he graduated college, but he had been back in town for two months before he actually told me. I expect the Debbie Downer persona I had adopted after my accident as the major reason why he had waited so long. It wasn’t that we didn’t stay in touch, or even that we didn’t take time to play games together from time to time. It’s just that I’m sure seeing me in person, knowing how different I actually am from when we were kids… I don’t know. He will have a lot of questions for me regardless, and I’m sure more than a few will be uncomfortable. Hell, if I had to bet money, I’d wager that my sister has been in contact with him since he’s been back, which means his questions WILL be uncomfortable.
Reaching the door to the cafe, I grew more and more unsure. Every voice in my head was telling me to just turn around, call a new car, and go home. I wanted to run, to will my leg into a miraculous recovery that would stun medical science, just so I could remove myself from the obviously awkward situation. But at the same time, I wanted to see my friend, my oldest and closest friend. I knew I couldn’t just hide from him. It was easy to brush over what I had been going through when talking to him over the phone or through a game on the internet, but I couldn’t just avoid him now that he was back home. I was going to have to face him sooner or later, and it wouldn’t get any easier if I picked later.
Slowly, I reached out and pushed open the door to the cafe. The place was surprisingly empty for it being near 12 in the afternoon, but that likely had more to do with the fact this was mostly a breakfast joint than anything else. Even considering the time of the day, the smell of coffee, baked goods, and breakfast foods still filled the air, causing my stomach to do a brief round of the rumblies, reminding me that I hadn’t eaten anything solid since yesterday. Scanning the interior, I quickly spotted Brian sitting by himself at a booth, reading over something on a tablet device. He seemed fairly invested in whatever he was looking at on the screen, as he didn’t notice me until I had almost reached him. Before I reached the booth itself, he looked up and we locked eyes in person for the first time in over 5 years. A big smile spread over his face as he quickly stood and wrapped me in a big hug. I returned the gesture as best as I could while balancing myself on my cane. After several long moments, he took a step back holding me by my shoulders.
“Wow man… you look like shit.”