Me look at bridge from bridge. Me look at bridge from river. Me look at bridge from big-stick-place…
It still broken, no matter how me look.
Me still sad.
Me watch the finny-flappers in da water.
Dey go down da stream…
Dey go… on adventcha?
Me… go adventcha? Me find carved-sticks an’ me bring dem back?
Dat be how me fix bridge?
Me look… me no know where go. Den me see. Dere no-grass place, an’ it go to big-stick-place. Me feel… me follow.
Dis it. Me go on adventcha!
Me go in nice big-stick-place… me no know what find, but dat adventcha. It no be adventca if me know what me find?
Me go fast, go past nice big-sticks an’ rocks like river rocks only bigger… an’ some dark.
[ You have entered: Spirited Wood ]
Da thing in me noggin back. Me swipe at it. No fun. Me no want dat.
Me no know how long me go, but me feel urge to un-drink. Me find big, nice, smooth stone.
Dis perfect piss-rock. It call me. Dis good.
Me let stream go… but den the rock move!
[ Contesting territory… ]
[ Current Owner: Entombed Spirit ]
Big sticks, but smooth an’ slithery like slither-scaler stab into da perfect piss-rock. Me go back, an’ da rock go high, an’ me have to look up at it.
It look down… an’ me stream still go. It eyes go scary, an’ it let out big noise! Den rock hit me in stomach an’ me fall back onto no-grass-ground.
Me stream no stop… an’ me stream on meself. Rock come at me face! Me roll away!
Nimble troll!
Me get to me feet… me never fought rock before… only snappy-jaw an’ big-mouth. Food.
Dat mean… perfect-piss-rock-thing think me food? Me no food!
Me not meant it! Me no think perfect-piss-rock be slither-stick thing!
Wait… if it stick-thing… it be big-stick! It know how make carved-stick!?
A slithery-big-stick jumpy at me an’ hit me ribs, an’ dat make me stumble an’ me feet go weird. Me see it comin’ an’ den me move but it change an’ hit me again!
It hurt! Me shoulder hurty, an’ da blood come. It make me go bye-bye?
Me feel smacky-water feeling.
Stop! Me no want hurt!
It throw rock at me, dis one no stuck to slithery-big-stick. Me catch rock…
Oh! It want play!?
Me put rock behind, den’ me throw it over me an’ it go fast-fast!
Catch dat one!
It no catch it.
Throw-rock hit perfect-piss-rock an’ fall over. Beauty-discs fly on breezy-breath. Me go to it… but it no move.
Me… no hurt it? Me no hurt it?
Perfect-piss-rock broken… slithery-big-sticks fall to ground.
Dey’s no blood? Den it no go bye-bye? It jus’ go bye?
Why it throw rock if it no catch rock?
Silly perfect-piss-rock-thing. Me shrug.
[ Contested Territory is cede to Grug ]
[ Grug the Troll is now owner of 0.0007% of the Living Wood ]
NO! BE GONE! ME NO WANT IN NOGGIN!
…
…
Da big-sticks here be nice… da dark-big-sticks no nice as dis. Dey weird. Me put hand on big-stick. Dis feel… nice.
It calm.
It safe.
Me wish it were carved-stick…
Da calm go. Now it scary!
What me do wrong!?
Me no touch… an’ scary-feeling go. Me shrug. It str— me see nice stick on ground.
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Me look at it.
Me jus’ look at it.
It… perfect-stick!
Me hand touch it… an’ it fit perfect! Dis made for Grug! It made for me!
Me giggle… an’ me pick-up it. Me have biggest, greatest stick!
Me strongest troll! Me go fast, swing stick, hear it sing in da breezy-breath as it go!
Me on adventcha, me play, me on no-grass… dis good!
Me swing da stick. It no stick now… it… swingy-singy! Perfect-stick be swingy-singy!
Hehe. Me smartest troll.
Da big-sticks never knew what hit ’em, me hit dem a thousand times before dey’s even blink! Me whack all da big-sticks, an’ me count!
One big-sticks! Two big-sticks! One big-sticks! Two big-sticks. What dat…? What more den two?
Somethin’ glowy… me look up, an’ dey’s a lump in da ground. It go high. On top of da lump dey’s a thingy… a glinty-shiny thingy… it like glowy-thingy on da roof-roof, but no so hurty.
It pretty. Me look at it… den me look away.
But… dey’s a spot in me eye. Me no see, only see da edges. Like dey’s a big hole in me eye. Me touch eye… dey’s no hole. What happen?
It go small, den’ small more. Den… it gone. Dat weird.
Oh well. Me look back at glinty-shiny… an’ den da weird hole back, but it little. Me look left… an’ it follow.
It like noggin-hurty-stuff. Me look at it… but it no stay. When me look, it go-go fast.
Den it gone again. Ok… no more looky at glinty-shiny, make hole in eye happen. Dat bad. But… me look at what under glinty-shiny.
It got… arms, like me. An’ legs, like me… but den it on top of somethin’ else with four legs… an’ dat no like me.
It got a long face… why da long face?
What dat be?
…
Wait… it got big swingy-singy… me look at me perfect-stick… it no so big. Dat no right! Me must be biggest swingy-singy stick troll! Me fix dis, like me fix bridge!
Me go up da lump—
[ You have entered: Noodleknob Village ]
[ Current Owner: Malachai Supremious ]
—me swat noggin-hurty-thing out of me eyes.
Me is gonna be da biggest swingy-singy stick troll!
But… me nose go smelly. It smell good. Lots… grass… but dry? But den… dey’s somethin’ else dat smell good-good lots. Me go, an’ it like cave… but da ground be dry-grass.
Somethin’ make bad-singy in it, an’ den me sees it. It small thing, like long-face-thing but no long face. It make lots bad-singy an’ it run an’ run in da little cave in da big cave.
Oh!
It fast food!
Me grab an’ me bite it, an’ den me leave da weird-dry-grass-cave. But… den… me get a little curious an’ me bite da dry-grass.
It no taste good.
Wat… me doin’?
Me look… an’ den me see da swingy-singy! Dat it!
Me go, an’ me touch. It… like rock. Dey’s a weird noise, like bad-singy but strange, an’ me turn. Dey’s a thingy. Me look at thingy on top of long-face-thingy.
It same thingy. Weird-thingy.
It turn an’ it go fast, down da lump, go big-bad-singy as it go. Me shrug. Weird-thingy. Like ugly troll. Dat it.
Me swingy, an’ me swingy, an’ me hear da breezy-breath. Dis rock-long-face-weird-thingy be like big-sticks! Be whacked!
Me whack it… an’ it no move. So me whack it again!
A crack! Me look at swingy-singy. Da perfect-stick… it… it broken!? Why it break!? It perfect stick!
Da rock-long-face-weird-thingy too strong?
Me no greatest troll?
No! Me smash rock, an’ den me hear weird thing an’ me look up. Da big-glinty-swingy-singy come at me, an’ it stabby me back an’ cut me back!
Dey’s blood, it fight back!
Me jump… but it no move. Da glinty-swingy-singy on da ground. Me jump! Me grab! An’ den me take it away!
Me look at rock-thingy. Me got biggest-swingy-singy now! Hehe
Me feet start tappin’, me hands start clappin’, me do a little dance! Dis new perfect-stick… but it no stick. It… river-hard-earth.
Me see dat in mud in river, but only little. Dis lots of it… it like carved-stick. Thick… an’ it heavy.
But it mine!
Me swing da swingy-singy, an’ den me smack it into da rock-long-face-thingy! It wobble, so me do it more! It tilt, it fall, den it go down da lump fast-fast!
It bump, it break, it swing, an’ den it crash into dry-grass-cave. Me biggest troll!
Me turn… me no even see… but dey’s a cave.
An’… it carved-sticks-cave! Me grab it… but it no like bridge, it no wet an’ smelly. Dis… new carved-stick? Den dis… carved-stick-grow-place!?
Me found it!
It shiny in da cave. Me drop swingy-singy… for now. Me go in da carved-stick cave… den me sees dem. Ripe carved-sticks, jus’ on da cave-ground.
Dey got… little legs? Why dey got legs?
It no matter.
Me grabby dem… an’ me fill me under-arms with dem. Me no carry more. Dey’s a big-shiny thing in da cave, an’ it got a weird-thingy on it. It big… but it no biggest, so me no whack it… yet.
Me try go out cave, but da carved-sticks touch da cave-open-bit. Me try again… an’ it no work.
Me carry lots-lots sticks… carry only lots sticks?
No! Me try again! An’ den me try again, more! Dis time, me shoulder go clicky an’ it hurty a little but me go out of cave!
Me lose one… two… one… two… one carved sticks, but me shoulder clicks back an’ den me no lose more, an’ me out of carved-stick-cave! Dis best! Me smartest troll!
Me stomach rumble.
Oh no.
Me drop lots carved-sticks an’ me go back in cave! Me squat on feet-feel-good thing an’ me let rip. Oh… oh… it bad! It bad one! It always bad after me eat snappy-jaws! Me forget!
Dey good eaty!
[ You have attempted to contest Noodleknob Village… ]
[ Current Owner: Malachai Supremious ]
…
…
[ Contest failed… acquire more surrounding land to contest. ]
[ Malachai Supremious has been notified. ]
Me bum ripping! It hurty! Dey’s blood!
Den it over. Me turn… me inspect me work. Da nice feet-feel-good colour gone, now it like no-ground… brown.
Den me smack noggin!
Me forgot!
Snappy-jaw no bad eaty, jus’ no eaty da teeth!
Dat why it hurty!
Me silly troll. Hehe.
Me go out from cave, an’ den me pick up carved-sticks… but den dey’s a strange sound.
Dis time, dey a lot of weird-thingys. Dey like… little troll… but dey ugly. Dey hold long-sticks with river-hard-earth on top. Dey look nice.
Dey also like sticks? Dey be friends?
But den me see… hot-thingy. It flicker in da breezy-breath. It… flicker-hot!
Me no like it. Me pick up carved-sticks an’ den me walk, but da weird-thingys go in front of me.
Dey wave da flicker-hot thingy at me, an’ me tilt me head. Me confused?
Den… something hurty me on me back. It really, really hurty, more den ever before! Me swing, an’ me lose grip of me carved-sticks an’ dey go flying! Me feel thump!
One of da weird-thingys on da floor. How dat happen. Silly wierd-thingy. Da other weird-thingys make lots-big noise, an’ dey swing da flicker-hot around.
Den they lets it go, an’ it flies at me.
Oh! Dey want play catch like slither-root thingy! Me drop carved-sticks an’ me grab it!
ME RIP HAND AWAY… it hurt… but it no even touch me?
Flicker-hot land on me shoulder, an’ it hurty hurty! But… den it no go. It no stop hurty? Why it no stop? Me no liky dis, me no liky dis! Why it no fix?
Dey swing more, an’ me back away. Me make sure no catch flicker-hot, even if dey want me catch. Dey step all around me, an’ dey wave da flicker-hots.
Dey even got long-stick flicker-hot! One bites me in back! It hurt! It hurt it hurt it hurt!
Me no want touchy flicker-hot, but dey make it bitey me! Me press against carved-stick-cave. Me heart go bumpy… me feel smacky-water feeling!
Me break cave!
Me sorry, carved-sticks!
Me go in cave, an’ da carved-sticks stabby me… den me back in carved-stick cave. Me still smacky-water feeling, very, very smacky-water feeling. Me want break thing.
It glint. Dey be shiny-river-hard-earth thingy, an’ dey’s a weird-thingy on it. It no move… it like rock weird-thingy. Me grab, an’ me pick-up, an’ den me throw!
It hit smooth-big-stick, an’ den dey’s lots cracks… den da cave start to rumble like me tummy. Me go fast! Me jump out an’ me scoop up me carved-sticks and me go!
Me look back… da cave crumble like dry-ground. Me… no like breaky thing. But da weird-thingys follow, an’ dey wave da flicker-hot, an’ dat scary and hurty, so me go.
Maybe… me fix weird carved-stick cave later?
Me drop some carved-sticks… me shoulder hurty… me back hurty. Why? It no right. It never hurty long!?
What happen!?