After about twelve hours, Elvenheim decided to check in on Mindeham.

"What are you doing?" she asked him. He was sitting by his screen, and obviously hadn't moved for a while, as the lights had automatically turned off.

"I'm trying to debug this code," Mindeham said.

"Is this a new project?" Elvenheim asked.

"Not really."

"Wait," Elvenheim said, suspicious. "You and Case aren't up to something, are you?"

"No, nothing like that," Mindeham said, highlighting a line on his screen and then doing a search on it. "Preasi just mentioned that my code for the Lightning Drive works differently to the company's, and I wanted to figure out why."

"First of all, are you actually looking at their code? Isn't that proprietary? Second of all, is she actually paying you for this?"

"Yes, no, and no, she just mentioned it to me and I'm doing this for myself."

"You know that's her plan, right? She's trying to manipulate you into figuring out who got it wrong, or how it is different, so she can get that information out of you for free."

"But I want to know," Mindeham protested, "and I owe her my results if she told me about it, at least."

"That's--no! At least eat something!"

"Oh," Mindeham said, and took the cold casserole from Elvenheim's hands. "Sorry. Thanks."

"Ugh," Elvenheim said. She ruffled his hair, and left him to his own devices.

***

Being unable to do anything useful in a firefight was bad enough. Being stuck down firmly onto a seat in a reclining position made it even worse.

"What's happening now?" Mindeham asked, before gulping down nausea as the acceleration of the ship violently changed.

"We are attempting to evade fire from the Wyrei," the robot said.

"Yes, we know what," Lae interjected. "How successful are we being at it?"

"Bluebubble is doing his best," the robot said, non-judgmentally.

"I hate it when computers don't give you a direct answer," Lae muttered, as the ship suddenly changed direction again. "Ugh..."

Sensing their unhappiness with his answer, the robot decided to give them a lecture on Wyrei vs Bluebubble-only (as opposed to Bluebuble-Making Ones combined) evasive tactics. Apparently, one-on-one, Bluebubbles were usually fine, as only the very talented Wyrei fighter pilots reacted to things in three dimensions, while the Bluebubbles, being a floating species, instinctively did so.

"Of course, if there is more than one Wyrei ship to a Bluebubble ship, then this advantage doesn't hold, as the Wyrei fighters as a rule choose different planes to move in," the robot said blythely.

"How many ships are out there?" Lae asked.

"Oh... seven. No, ten," the robot said.

"You're this far into the fight and you don't know how many there are?!" Lae shouted.

"More of them are coming out of warp," the robot said.

"We're doomed," Mindeham moaned.

"No," the robot said, "the new Wyrei are shooting at the old Wyrei."

"We're saved!" Mindeham exclaimed.

"Oh, no," the robot said. "The enemy still far outnumbers us."

It was at this point something beeped loudly on the console.

"What was that?" Mindeham asked.

"That was the sound weapon, saying that it is done," the robot said.

"The what?"

"It's our new device. Maybe it will work."

"Oh, great!"

Diagnostics of the Wyrei ships assembled and downloaded into the sound weapon software, the Bluebubble ship ejected its torpedoes, targeting the enemy ships. Two got hit perfectly, two were missed altogether, and three were hit in suboptimal places. The last three had small holes blasted in their hulls. The first two suffered much greater damage. At first, nothing seemed to happen; then the ships seemed to ripple, and completely broke apart.

"Now there are much better odds," the robot informed them.

***

Having broken the back of the people they were fighting against was rather important, because as it turned out Bluebubbles--at least the group Bluebubble came from--did not feel comfortable asking for things when they were already indebted to someone. Whether taking this into account or not, the first words from the Wyrei that were fighting for them was to thank them for their help in 'bringing down this evil faction', which the robots, after they had a few minutes before explained why they might be in trouble with respect to map trading, assured the humans that meant everything was okay.

"It's good, Mindeham," Lae said. "We learnt something new."

"I don't need to have a heart attack to learn something new, thank you," Mindeham muttered.

The Wyrei, gratifyingly to the humans who had a privacy treaty with them, at first refused to give Bluebubble any maps to human space; then, when they learnt he had two lost humans on board, got quite excited and asked for their help in return for helping them contact humans.

"What do they want our help for?" Lae asked. After a bit of to-ing and fro-ing between the robots, Bluebubble, and the Wyrei, the robots eventually said,

"They have entered into negotiations with a human because they needed help and permission to take down the bad Wyrei," the robot said, after apologising for the imperfect translation. "But they fear they have trapped themselves into an agreement that they cannot afford."

The two humans looked at each other.

"What is the human called?" Mindeham asked.

"The Wyrei call them 'The Legal Thief,'" the robot said.

"I think that's what they call Preasi," Lae said.

"I would expect so," Mindeham said, nodding. "Didn't you say she isn't allowed to talk to aliens anymore?"

"They don't send her out to make first contact," Lae said. "They can't really stop her once relations have been established and formalised."

"Still, that would annoy her tremendously," Mindeham said, then, turning to the robots: "if Bluebubble agrees, tell the Wyrei to offer her instead a chance to meet with a new species, with advanced software capabilities."

After some more back and forth between the ships, and Mindeham's (and to a less confident extent, Lae's) assurances that they could handle the Legal Thief and wouldn't be fleeced for all they had in order to get home, the Wyrei agreed to try the deal.

"We are grateful," they said, and half their fleet went into warp.

***

While Preasi was properly grateful to Elvenheim and Case for helping her, she was not grateful enough to allow them to foist the children onto her.

"You can keep them in my ship, sure," she said, "but you know I don't do deals with children."

"You don't have to do deals with them!" Elvenheim said. "You just have to look after them until we get them to someone trained to do so."

"Well, you look after them, then, you have a whole bunch of people you look after on a regular basis. You're used to it."

"I have a whole bunch of adults that I work with," Elvenheim corrected. "I do not take care of children."

They both turned to Case.

"What?"

"Didn't you babysit your niece for a whole three months once?" Preasi said.

"One niece, a thousand years ago, and I wasn't very good at it!"

"That's settled, then." Preasi read something on her screen, and closed it down. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have important things to do."

"She's up to something," Elvenheim said, when Preasi had left the room. "I'd better follow her. Please make sure they don't kill each other, all right?"

"Ugh," Case said. "Can't we find--" but Elvenheim was out the door.

Case looked at the children. The children looked at Case.

"It's time to tell the truth," Case told them. "You aren't going to a new job, we have actually rescued you. You are going to a space that people like us live in only, for the most part."

"But what will we do?" one of the ten year olds asked.

"Learn things," Case said, "Like human ways of talking, and things about the world around you and how it works. And when you are old enough, you can choose something to do that you like doing."

"What do you do?"

"I go around finding things out," Case said. "And when something bad happens, I tell people about it who can deal with it."

"I want to do that," one of them declared.

"You can when you are older and have learnt enough," Case said. "I'll let you into my organisation, no problem."

"I want to do that now," the child said. "You will probably be put in an egg hole long before I am old."

"Well, I will tell other people how good you'll be at that work if you'd like," Case said, "but actually, my death is highly unlikely."

***

"Really," Preasi said, "You don't have to follow me around."

"Really I think I do," Elvenheim said. "I know that look on your face. You're up to something, aren't you?"

"No," Preasi said, obviously lying.

"Look," Elvenheim said. "I am not the government of World. I am not going to judge you for not following regulations,"

"Yes you will," Preasi said. Elvenheim's eyes narrowed.

"Are you meeting a new species?"

"Technically no?"

"Technically?"

"Look," Preasi said, stopping and turning around. "They've met humans before. They actually have some humans with them. They know how human language works, because they've spoken to the humans who are with them. It's just that they haven't met them officially."

"Meeting you is not official," Elvenheim said sternly.

"Yeah, but what's one more human?" Preasi said, wheedling. Elvenheim sighed.

"You can meet them," Elvenheim said, "but I will be there to make sure you don't give us a bad name."

"Fine," Preasi said, sounding grumpy, and led Elvenheim to the docks.

***

"So what's our plan?" Lae asked. "Is Preasi going to try and do a deal with us to get us to human space?"

"I don't know," Mindeham said gloomily. "I don't know what any of them will be like after this long."

Unauthorized content usage: if you discover this narrative on Amazon, report the violation.

"Well, do you think that she'll be pleased to see you?"

"Probably not," Mindeham said. "I didn't see her last under the best of circumstances."

"Why? What did you do?"

"I saw them all last just after I technically killed them all with the Light of Immortality," Mindeham said.

"Oh," Lae said. looking pensive. "Maybe they'd be happy with you? Perhaps they like their immortality?"

"You think?" Mindeham said gloomily.

"Granted, they weren't going to be tortured to death like I was, but I think it is generally considered human nature to want to be alive," Lae said. "Aren't you happy to be alive?"

"Sometimes," Mindeham said, and was silent for the rest of the trip.

***

In the end, Elvenheim nagged Preasi enough that she snapped.

"Fine, you go and take care of the alien and make sure they're settled in comfortably," she said. "I'll look after the humans."

It was actually a good strategy, learning as much as you could about the alien before meeting with it, but Preasi had honestly wanted the challenge, and so Elvenheim genuinely believed Preasi was making a grudging allowance to World decree and human sensibilities.

"Out of you, me, and Case, you have the purest motives here, so I guess you're the most moral choice to look after him," Preasi said.

"Thank you," Elvenheim said.

Bardlenni customs had set up a tent around the berth the alien was docking in, and Elvenheim went over with the scientists and the station mayor to deal with the alien. Preasi ushered the humans, two bewildered looking creatures with one of the alien's little ball-with-arms robots in tow, out to a separate meeting room, and tried to keep them comfortable while the customs officers swabbed them and found them clean.

One of the humans, the lady who said she was a postman and did all the talking, seemed very relieved to get back home. The other, the man with the tangled curls in his shoulder-length hair and the awkward way of wearing his clothes, seemed very withdrawn. Preasi's eyes kept on being drawn to his face. It seemed familiar somehow.

"I'm sorry," she said. "Have we met?"

He looked at her.

"Yeah," he said, and his voice gave her the final clues she needed to place him. Her eyes went wide.

"You're alive!" she squeaked, then jumped up and spoke urgently with the customs officials. One of them walked out, and Preasi came back, looking distracted.

"I've got them to get you a hairdresser," Preasi said. "Elvenheim's here, you can't meet her looking like that, she'd freak."

"We did the best we could with it," Lae said.

"And you did very well," Preasi said, "but it'll need to look professional to get past Elvenheim. Mindeham, where have you been?"

"I've been tortured on an alien ship this whole time," Mindeham said. Preasi shook her head.

"You can't just say it right out like that to Elvenheim," she said. "Say that you were captured or something first, sort of soften the blow a bit."

"All right," he said.

"Bluebubble wants to know if this means he should not tell Elvenheim your name until this hairdresser arrives," the robot said.

"Yes--uh, Mindeham?" Preasi asked.

"Yes, please," Mindeham said, after a moment.

"Case is here too. We could have a party," Preasi said. "If you want one."

"What for?"

"To welcome you home of course!"

"Oh," Mindeham said. "Okay."

To Lae's relief, he looked a lot less gloomy after that.

***

Elvenheim itched to ask the alien about their robots, but tried to make polite conversation instead. The robots followed them about, did their translations, and seemed to anticipate their needs.

"Are your robots sentient?" Elvenheim asked when she couldn't stand it anymore.

There was a pause.

"I don't think so," they said through a robot. "They have never as far as I can tell moved to do anything for themselves. I don't know though. I have only just been rescued, and they are more advanced than they were in my time. It is a worrying thought. If they are, we have just replaced one sentient species with another. And in my time at least, we were very concerned that that not happen."

"You were rescued?"

"Yes, from the Making Ones. The new human knew how to work the doors."

"Who are the Making Ones?" Elvenheim asked. Bluebubble described them enough that Elvenheim recognised the sun-devils.

"I was captured by them briefly just recently," Elvenheim said.

"My condolences. In Bardlenni space?"

"In human space. They were moving through it, attacking settlements."

"And they escaped?"

"Yes," Elvenheim said.

Bluebubble paused, and then the robot said, "you might see more of them, then, and more of my kind as well. They might just forget where they were, though. And you would not have to worry about my own kind--you are too spikey for anyone to want to swallow, I think."

Elvenheim was a little taken aback at this, but continued on with the conversation.

"How long were you captured?" she asked.

"The first human said that we were there for a thousand years," Bluebubble said. At first Elvenheim thought that was just hyperbole on the human's part, but Bluebubble apparently hadn't been around for significant technological and possibly moral changes in his society. It was possible...

"The human did not die for a thousand years?" Elvenheim asked.

"Is that not usual for your kind?"

"No. Is... do you know his name?"

"I apologise. I did not know you could identify him so easily. I did not want to cause distress. Preasi wanted to keep Mindeham's name from you until he looked a little better."

"And what is Preasi doing now?" Elvenheim asked, her tone of voice making the robots get between her and Bluebubble.

"She is arguing with a hairdresser," Bluebubble said.

"Please excuse me," Elvenheim said, and left Bluebubble and his robots alone.

***

Bluebubble's robots warned them just in time to look suitably innocent when Elvenheim walked in, but she didn't pay attention to anything much apart from Mindeham.

"Are you okay?" she asked.

"Yes," he said. "Lae and Bluebubble rescued me. How are you?"

"Oh, fine," Elvenheim said, catching his hands in her own. "You're going to stay around, aren't you?"

"I didn't mean to leave," Mindeham said. "My drive glitched, and I got lost."

Elvenheim was crying by now, and Preasi and Lae took this as a cue to quietly leave. The robot hesitated, then followed them.

"Are they sad?" the robot asked.

"Just emotional," Preasi reassured it. "Elvenheim has missed Mindeham, that's all."

"They are friends?"

"They are siblings--from the same parents," Preasi said.

"Same--they have two parents?"

While Preasi explained human biology to the robot (and therefore Bluebubble), Lae wandered over to the Bardlenni hairdresser.

"I think you can go now if you want," Lae said.

"Wouldn't miss it for the world," the hairdresser said cheerfully.

"What the hell--?" Case muttered, rereading the message Preasi had sent him:

MINDE BACK, ARRANGE PARTY.

"What's wrong?" one of the children asked anxiously.

"Yes," one agreed out loud, Case having taught them how to speak a few words.

"Nothing to worry about. I don't know if--holy hell, she means Mindeham!" Case said the last bit out loud.

"What? What?" the children asked, alarmed at the look on his face.

"Everything is fine," Case said, feeling dazed. "I just have to organise a party, is all."

"What's a party?"

Case looked upset for a minute. Of course, the children would have never experienced a party.

"It's a set period of time when everyone comes together to have fun."

"Fun?" one of the children asked. Evidently, they weren't taught that one, either.

"Tell you what," Case said. "You can help me prepare for it."

***

Eventually Mindeham, Lae, and Bluebubble were given the all-clear by customs, and taken out to the rooms Preasi was hiring.

"I guess we can all fit into my ship," Preasi was saying, "though it will be a squeeze. If possible, I'd like us to leave tomorrow morning, as--argh!"

Children in glittery costumes pulled party poppers at them as they went through the door, spraying them with confetti.

"Case, why are the children here?" Preasi asked, walking into her office-turned-partyroom and spotting Case in the corner, helping a four-year-old make some kind of punch.

"Oh," Case said. "They've never seen a party before, so I invited them. I figured we'd have a massive party at Paradrei's when we get back, so it wouldn't matter too much if this one is more kid-friendly. Mindeham! Good to see you."

"Hello," Mineham said, feeling a little overwhelmed. "Er, this is Lae, and Bluebubble, and Bluebubble's robots."

"Very good to meet you all," Case said. While he was distracted, the four-year-old almost fell off the table; Bluebubble's robots hurried in to stabilise it. "Thanks, Bluebubble's robots."

"They know how to care for large humans, are small humans similar?" Bluebubble asked via the robot nearest Case.

"Yes, but it's harder to get feedback from them. They cry if they're upset, though, so you can tell in that case."

"And are these a subspecies, or a younger version?"

"They are young," Case said. "Er, we count how old we are by our native planet's orbital period, Lae here, you would be...?"

"Twenty seven," Lae said.

"Thanks, and this one is two, and this one ten," Case said, pointing out children.

One of the children ran straight at Bluebubble, and bounced off.

"Er... sorry," Case said.

"That is okay," Bluebubble said, but floated up near the ceiling where he was less in reach.

"So what are your plans for this party, Case?" Elvenheim asked.

"Well, I was thinking first we play pass the parcel--"

"No," Preasi said, and headed for the punch.

***

After all the party games were finished and the children had gone to bed, the adults sat around and talked.

"So you are known for exploring now," Mindeham said, nodding at Elvenheim, "and you, Preasi, are known for extra-diplomatic trade deals, and you, Case, have a spy network that spans all of human space."

"Well, people think I have a spy network that spans all of human space. I'm not sure if that's correct, though. For one thing, I am not sure all the outer colonies are covered. For another thing, it isn't really a spy network, just an alternative information dissemination pathway."

"Seems legitimate," Mindeham said, a little dubiously. "So what are the others doing?"

"Oh," Elvenheim said, "Well, Aphelka is on Wor--I mean, Earth."

"Still a politician?"

"Advises politicians. Xysphael runs a charity, as you'd expect, and Trem has this massive scavenger... sub-society? Paradrei tends to just party or keep to himself--he doesn't do stunts any more. I actually haven't seen Wendolina for a while--"

"That's dangerous," Mindeham commented.

"--but I think she's still on her original station. You'll never guess what Byque is doing."

"Did he join a cult?" Mindeham asked after a moment's thought.

"No, he's in education. He designs and records the education tapes for a large part of human space. It's very odd, because now half the galaxy has his accent."

"You all have a weird dialect, now," Mindeham said. "I could barely figure out what Lae was saying when we first met."

"I'm sorry it's been so long," Elvenheim said, gripping Mindeham's hand. "If I had had any idea where you were, I'd have found you."

"Have we told you how Lae rescued us yet?" Mindeham asked. "I had no idea how their circuits worked, and she did. Sometimes you just don't know things. It's frustrating, and can get you into real trouble, but it's not your fault." He paused for a moment. "I'd probably be mad if I had been locked up in a cupboard in your house somewhere though, but it still wouldn't have been your fault."

"We should plan your big party," Case said. "We can play pin the tail on the donkey--"

"No," Preasi said. "We'll have the finest Bardenni wines--"

"No," Elvenheim objected. "You know I don't like that psychoactive stuff. We'll have music, and dancing--"

"Why don't we just have all of that?" Lae suggested. "Have a party that everyone can enjoy?"

"I like your thinking," Case said. "We'll get Paradrei to host, it'll be swell."

"I think I understand parties now," Bluebubble said suddenly. "They are like when we all used to get together and spin ourselves by bouncing against poles. It is being good in your mind."

"Yes, like that," Elvenheim said doubtfully. She guessed there were limited options for having fun when you were a perfect sphere. "We will probably head off to bed soon, what place can we get you?"

"I will be fine here," Bluebubble said.

"All right," Elvenheim said. When they all did eventually go to bed, Elvenheim looked back. Bluebubble was on the ground in a corner, surrounded by robots and still covered in confetti. He looked like a large abandoned beach ball.

"It's fine," Elvenheim muttered to herself, and went to bed.

***

Mindeham woke up the next morning to the arm of one of Bluebubble's robots next to his face.

"Er, hello," he said.

"Do you mind me following you?" Bluebubble asked through the robot. "I can go back if you'd like now you are with your mother-father sibling."

Bluebubble still couldn't quite wrap his head around the idea that all humans had two parents, but then Mindeham was sure the human biologists would be puzzled at the evolutionary state of a species that didn't mix its genes.

"I don't mind. Do you mind our atmospheres?"

"No, the air is fine. The downforce is better for bouncing than flying, but you have small spaces so that is fine."

"You don't find it upsetting? Being in small spaces all the time?"

"When you are my age all spaces are small," Bluebubble said. "I do not mind."

"Do you have to eat particular things? Does your food need to be alive, for example?"

"We make our food in vats at home. At least we did in my day."

"Then you are welcome to stay with me," Mindeham declared.

"I am happy to hear you say it. I might go back some time. I am worried about the robots. But I do not know for sure if I am worried for nothing."

"Why are you worried?" Mindeham asked, sitting up and looking at the robot.

"They all seemed to like 'pass-the-parcel'."

The implications of this took a while to hit home.

"You think they are sentient? Do you know who you are, robot?"

There was a pause.

"I don't know if they don't speak because they are prevented, or because they don't know how to answer. They answer other questions," Bluebubble said after the robot didn't speak for itself.

"Well, give it some time," Mindeham said. "I'm sure we'll figure it out."

After all the humans were washed, fed, and dressed, the Immortals decided where they were going to go.

"I reckon Paradrei's house would be best to go to first," Preasi said. "We can leave him setting up the party while we find everyone else. Plus, he tends to have lots of staff--some of them can look after the children."

"Seems good to me," Case said.

"You're our ride, so I'll go wherever you think is best," Elvenheim shrugged.

Elvenheim wanted Mindeham in their ship, so Lae and Case decided to keep Bluebubble company on his.

"Give us a ten minute head start so we can work out the docking procedure for your ship," Preasi said.

"Will do," Lae said. They said their temporary goodbyes, and left the Bardlenni station.