As we stepped out of the courthouse and into Galhim proper, we had to wade through the waters to head downtown. They turned Lang’s regal robes a grimy brown, but the wizardly gnome doing our revival spells opted out. He cast magic on himself to float over the water effortlessly.

To me, getting wet made a simple break from the heat. The cool waters felt good against my bare skin as the sun beat down. Storm clouds had been replaced by Galhim’s good old burning sky again.

We grabbed a kebab on the way, and I asked about Nordak. “So, where’s the big green at? I'm gonna guess he’s not working for you now that you’re the mayor and he’s not a slave.”

Lang paid for my meal as he chuckled, “No, no, there’s not much for him to do in terms of paperwork. He’s been participating some outside the walls in clearing the Rot, although he complains every time that I see him about it. Odrem’s order of clerics has grown considerably in just a week, I should say, and they do most of the important work now. The adventurers are quickly becoming mere bodyguards. We’ll see him soon, though.”

“With Bradley?” I asked.

Lang nodded and pointed to the great imperial palace growing closer. “He has, erm, shacked up in the house of the old blood.”

“I still can’t fucking believe it,” I said. Sure, I knew Bradley had a big last name, but I never would have guessed Lang could actually pull off getting him into power. Part of me wondered if the gnome had been planning it all along, somehow. But I knew even he wasn’t that smart.

“Bradley Athenstris is heir to the college of Tristerhone in Pelior, founded by a member of the imperial bloodline who went east some thousands of years ago. Amazingly, our boy is by right the purest candidate in the city for kingship. I know what you may be thinking, but personally, I gain very little from it. We go now to revive Bradley as an act of reconciliation for the old emperor’s assassination.”

“It’s not as if the damn humans couldn’t do it themselves,” our ancient wizard griped. “Certainly not as though I might have better things to do!”

“You do not. Besides, it is a symbol,” Lang said, “of our renewed brotherhood! That must take priority.” For me, he added more bluntly, “Gnomes and humans have not had such bad relations since the end of the Great War of Dwarven Extinction. No one trusts anyone anymore, and it’s such a tragedy.”

They trusted Lang at least, I thought. He betrayed his own people to defeat the cult. He had to be holding things together by sheer will at this point.

As I finished my kebab, stick and all, we came to the base of the palace hill, and the magic gates swung wide. The guards there ushered us in and gave us a royal welcome. They walked with us up the hill as landscapers worked everywhere.

“You should have taken the carriage,” the ancient gnome told Lang. “It’s unbefitting to be in this state for you as the mayor. You represent our people now, young Mirius. Though I shudder to say it.”

Lang used prestidigitation to clean up his robes and appear perfectly pristine again. He offered me the same, but I turned him down. Most gnomes didn’t pick up these kinds of adventurer’s tricks, and I could see the codger looking askance.

I dried off quickly enough in the sun, as I had barely just a pair of pants on. But nobody called a goblin unbefitting for something like that. Especially not a hero goblin known for very little restraint.

Nordak waved from the steps of the palace as we came into view around a great big, animal-shaped hedge. He had an expensive pair of armor on him. Now that he didn’t need to split his adventuring income with Lang, it seemed he had cash to spare. One of his tusks even had a damn gold cap.

No more five percent for me either, I thought. I could have my own godsdamn party if I wanted.

“Bogart!” Nordak cried. “You’re not dead anymore!”

“You bet your ass!” I called back. “I don’t remember much, and everything hurts, so that’s definitely me alive.”

We entered the foyer of the palace, and the guards led us into the private wing. Inside the master bedroom, we found Bradley lying down like he simply slept. The only thing to give him away as a corpse was his ghostly pale skin and his sunken eyes. His hair looked as fabulous as ever.

“May I please proceed now?” The ancient gnomish wizard asked.

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Lang nodded for him to go, and they started their incantation. Long and strange magical syllables strung together to make a hypnotizing sound. Bradley began to stir just barely, a twitch there, a jerk here. Life came to refill his corpse.

I looked at the sword beside him on the bed. Accord had been laid out, as expensively ornate as ever. One hand of Bradley’s rested on the hilt, clinging in death just as always.

Nordak whispered to me while we waited on the sidelines. “We have to go drinking after this. Many bars in town have been giving me free drinks. You’ll love it.”

I chuckled, and I remembered the promise I made to myself to go whoring around. Had to balance out my karma after doing so much good nonsense lately. Finally, it was just me and my money these days. No more big and important missions to do.

The ancient gnome grunted in anger as he worked. He began to repeat some of his magic words with more force. “Damn you,” he cut in.

“What’s wrong?” Lang asked.

“It’s fighting me,” the gnome quickly said, then went back to chanting. “Wretched thing.”

“Wait, Accord?” I spoke. “Didn’t ya hear, Accord? Bradley’s gonna be emperor. I figured you’d want a piece of that action, dumbass. Your stolen soul there is only gonna get more and more powerful, so stop fighting the old guy!”

The sword did not reply, but the exertion of the wizard became even more severe. I started to worry. Whatever reason Accord had to hold on now, he didn’t change his mind. The demon inside wanted Bradley’s soul to stay put.

I wondered why it hadn’t been this hard to get me back. But then again, Bradley was the main wielder and Accord never cared much about my soul anyway. Less than worthless, he’d called it.

I heard something then. It started just barely audible as a whisper, but it grew louder until it echoed down the palace halls. “This soul is mine, and it shall remain in my domain!” Accord bellowed. “My power is eternal! My might is unshakable!”

Well, that ain’t good, I thought.

Lang raised a hand and began to chant alongside his gnomish ally. The two of them together strengthened the spell. Servants at the edge of the room ran off in a panic, calling for more help from the court mages. All hell broke loose.

The bed began to shake, and the windows exploded into the trimmed hedges beyond as the curtains flew on the wind. Accord started to chant in some infernal language I did not speak, his voice filling the room to overpower the rest.

Before the other mages could arrive though, it all went silent in a gasp. Bradley sat bolt upright in bed and sucked for air. His eyes went wide.

“You’re back!” Nordak said.

“There ya go,” I called.

Bradley threw Accord off the sheets and scurried away from the blade in fear. The man took hold of the half-orc and hugged himself close like a scared toddler. I’d never seen him like this before, and it gave me the willies.

“There, there,” Lang comforted, trying to calm him down. “You’re back now, my boy. Your life is returned to you. Take stock of your surroundings and calm yourself.”

“No. No. No more!” Bradley repeated. “Not again!”

Nordak pried the man off and tried to tuck him back in by force. The spellsword looked at his own hands like he’d never seen them before, and he took in our faces slowly. First the half-orc and then Lang; he regarded them quickly, but his eyes locked on me. “D-did you see it?” he stuttered.

I shook my head no. “Is there something I should know, big bad Brad?”

His eyes began to water, but he fought the tears back. I tried not to cringe at the awkwardness, and as he saw me grimacing, Bradley steeled himself. He took in a big, wet sniff. “It’s Accord, Bogart. He’s… he’s growing his strength so that he can eventually become a god. His domain is utterly worse than I imagined, with so much torture. It’s why he was bound with a Cryptum so long ago. He's not lawful evil like the other demon lords. Fucking gods save me. He’s chaotic. The bastard is chaotic evil!”

The man barely had control of himself. The court wizards arrived at last and came to hover over the bed, detecting magic and casting healing, just in case. They preened over him like a doting old woman.

“What in bloody hells is this?!” Bradley asked, suddenly aware of where we were. He fought off the helpers and sprung back from his bed and onto the floor.

“They’re gonna make you emperor,” I told him. This guy didn’t know how good he had it yet, and he couldn't slow down enough to realize it. “You’re royal enough to fit the crown, Bradley. Not Uldar, but close enough. Isn't that great news, human? Hello?”

The spellsword shook his head like he didn’t believe it. “No. No, where am I? This doesn't make any sense. It's another one of Accord's tricks. The Athenstris bloodline is mortal enemies with the Uldar!”

Some of the servants knew it, and they tried to hide their scowls. The court magus tending to the new emperor just told him plainly, “The child emperor was the end of the line, sire. You’re all that we have left of the old blood now. For better or worse…”

“But I don’t even have the gift of magic,” Bradley spoke. “It's just... impossible.”

“Jeez, Brad, did you lose your brains while you were dead?” I gestured widely to the gold-lined palace around us. “They wanna give you all this shit!”

Bradley covered his face, and I heard the trembling in his words. “All I want now is my soul back. I’ve made a terrible mistake.” He stared me down, “We both have, Bogart. You too, Nordak. We made a horrible, horrible mistake."

"It was necessary at the time, alright," I said. "Just, calm your tits. We'll figure something out."

The half-orc shrugged. “I like being big. Besides, I can’t be killed, so I'm not worrying.”

Everyone stared at him the same way. I mean, we knew he was dumb, but he'd just passed into a whole new level.

“…What?” I asked.

“Yeah," Nordak said. "I figure, if I could be killed, I would have been killed by now. I don’t need my soul if I don’t ever die. So, I’m safe.”

“That’s… not how that works, big guy. You’re still gonna get fucking old.”

“Prove it,” Nordak challenged. "I've survived being stabbed in the heart. In the brain. Old age can't defeat me now."

Instead of fighting him, I just sighed. We had a lot to figure out.