The Chief kicked up a cloud of dust as it rumbled along the short gravel road to Kimmie’s house. The sun hung low in the sky, obscured by the rolling hills blocking Ollie’s view of the coast. Sunset was about fifteen minutes away, and already the temperature had dipped into the low fifties. Ollie’s jacket lay on the seat next to him. He wanted to enjoy the cool weather for a change. Living in New Orleans these last few years, he’d had his fill of hot, humid nights.

Ollie approached the house and veered to the side of the road, just short of the busy driveway. Three cars were parked next to the house, two of which he assumed must be her current boarders. He turned the truck off and grabbed his jacket.

“Wait here until I come and get you.”

“Yeah, yeah.”

Ollie climbed out and locked the door before shutting it. He walked around and opened the truck’s rear hatch, pulling a key ring out of his pocket. He kept his important stuff in the metal lockbox welded to the floor in the back. Weapons, tools, toys. As he flipped through the keys, Kimmie bounded out of her house, dressed in a sweatshirt, jogging pants and some running shoes. Even casual, she looked incredible. He realized he was staring at her as she approached.

“It’s time?” she asked.

He nodded. “It’s time.”

Ollie found the key to the lockbox. He leaned over and slid the key into the rusty old lock and wriggled it, searching for the right amount of pressure to get it to turn.

“You’re early.”

She wandered up alongside the Chief, running a finger against the side panels while making a face at the thick layer of dirt. Ollie glanced up at the front seat, making sure Grika was out of sight.

“I’m getting dinner ready for my boarders,” she said. “You should eat with us before we go.”

The lock clicked over, and Ollie yanked the key out. “Go where?”

“To hunt.” She bounced on the balls of her feet. “I’m ready to catch me a greenie.”

Ollie glanced over at her. “You’re not coming with me.”

Kimmie blinked at him. “Sure I am.”

Ollie shook his head. “This isn’t something you need to be around for.” He opened the lockbox. Sitting on top of a smattering of automotive tools was a green duffel bag, a little smaller than the one at the hotel. He lifted the bag out and dropped it on the bed of the Chief. “This kind of work is dark, dirty, and dangerous. That’s why I do it alone.”

He unzipped the bag part of the way and sifted through the items inside.

Kimmie watched him for a moment, then straightened her back. “Well, now you can do this with company.”

A quick laugh escaped his lips. “I don’t think so.”

“That’s the kinda the whole reason you’re here.”

Ollie straightened and stared at her for a long moment, expecting her to laugh, or some other indication that this was a joke. None came.

“I’m here to hunt a goblin. Not to babysit amateurs.” Her eyebrows shot up, and he realized he might have gone too far. “No offense, but I don’t take people hunting with me, especially people with no experience at it. Going out in the daylight is one thing, but it’s a different story at night.”

Kimmie crossed her arms. “Well, lucky for you, I don’t need a babysitter. I’m perfectly capable of handling dirty and dangerous work without a nanny.”

Ollie sighed. Why did his instincts about this woman have to be so on the money? He turned to face her.

“Have you ever hunted a goblin before?”

“No.”

“Have you ever fought a goblin before?”

“Clearly not.”

“Have you ever killed a goblin before?”

Now she just stood there, staring at him.

“Then sorry, but it’s not happening.” He resumed rifling through the items in his bag, moving a few tools over from the lockbox. “I know you mean well, and you’ve probably spent a whole afternoon reading up about what I do on that cool website of yours, but people get killed doing this. I have a very simple set of rules regarding my hunts, and rule number one is ‘Don’t take inexperienced amateurs or well-meaning clients into a goblin lair’. That’s how goblin mischief turns into dead bodies in a ravine. Taking you out there would be like taking a civilian into a warzone. Not smart for either of us.”

She put her hands on her hips. “Then show me how it’s done. Train me.”

Ollie shook his head. “Two hours from now, if everything goes well, you’ll never see me or a goblin ever again. So, there’s not a lot of incentive for either of us to train you in a skill you should never need after tonight.”

She gave him a quizzical look. “Are you being for real, right now? Is this some brooding,” she lowered her voice, “’I work alone’ thing you’re pulling on me?”

Ollie shut the lockbox and zipped up the bag. “This isn’t a game. Those things are real, and they’re dangerous. It’s no place for you.”

Kimmie pretended to wave a fan at her face. “Oh! How chivalrous of you, Mr. Lone Wolf with your cool jacket and big boots and obnoxious truck! Here to martyr yourself for all the little people. Well, guess what? I’m not some damsel-in-distress who needs you to run off and slay the dragon while I cower in the castle skimming through goblin websites on my laptop. I’m a grown woman who supports herself, pays her taxes, and survived a freaking goblin encounter last summer. I’m fully capable of making my own decisions regarding my safety and what I do with my time, and I have decided that I will be a part of this hunt. Or,” she hesitated, “there won’t be a hunt at all.”

“Really?” Ollie raised an eyebrow. “Are you saying I should leave?”

“I’m saying you should take me with you. If not,” she shoved her hands in her pockets, “I can find another hunter.”

She didn’t sound entirely convincing, but Ollie wasn’t prepared to call her bluff. Despite her stubbornness, he really wanted his fee.

“Let me get this straight. If I don’t take you with me, your plan is to get rid of me and my pesky ethics regarding client safety, and find some other hunter who has no problem letting you tag along into a dark forest in the middle of the night where deadly monsters might be roaming around, waiting to rip your arm from its socket?”

This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road. If you spot it on Amazon, please report it.

Kimmie’s mouth formed a thin line, frustration raging behind her serene expression. Ollie could sympathize.

“I hate to break this to you,” she said, “but since I’m pretty sure you don’t have any kind of official goblin hunting license in your pocket, and you’re certainly not part of a goblin hunters Local 101, then basically the only difference between you and me in terms of hunting is that you’ve done it more.”

Ollie slung the strap of his duffel bag over his shoulder and closed the rear hatch. “Okay. Answer a quick question for me. If the power goes out in your house, or a pipe breaks, is it suddenly really important for you to fix that yourself? Or do you call a plumber or an electrician? You know, someone who has some experience in that line of work. Because that’s what this is. I’m a glorified plumber, here to fix some pipes, and you’ve done all you need to do here just by hiring me.”

Kimmie rubbed her temples. “Oh my God, do I have to spell this out for you? I didn’t bring you here to hunt FOR me. I brought you here to hunt WITH me! That’s the job! That’s why I’m paying instead of your broker or whatever other arrangement you have going on. I’ve spent months watching this thing skulk around in those trees, just out of sight, or hiding in the shadows, and I haven’t been able to do anything about it. Until now! I have an actual hunter standing in front of me, who can show me what to do, how to do it, and you think this is the equivalent of a service call from my home warranty company? Are you really that dense?”

Ollie’s eyes widened at the hostility in Kimmie’s voice. He’d been yelled at by clients before, even people whose lives he’d saved, and he’d taken it in stride. But today, for some reason, he’d had enough of being belittled after everything he’d sacrificed. “You know, you’re right. Maybe you do need a new hunter. Because I don’t need this kind of aggravation from someone clearly looking for a thrill.”

He walked around to the driver’s side door and fished for his key. She stomped after him.

“What did you say?”

He turned, catching her off guard. “I know your type. You want to jump in feet first without any thought to how reckless it might be. You and all the other amateurs running around out here, trying to hunt bears with slingshots because none of you realize how dangerous what I do is. Did any of your research prepare you for the fact that while half of these things will steal your food, the other half will crush your skull? Is that a regular topic of conversation on your website? If it isn’t, it should be, because you don’t do the things I do just so you can get your kicks. Maybe you should write a blog post about that because God knows your website flunkies could use a little harsh reality.”

Ollie regretted the words as he was saying them, but someone had to be the bad guy.

Kimmie’s expression darkened.

“You think you know me? Fine. Two can play that game.” She held up a finger. “Item number one, let’s not forget, that is my backyard,” she pointed at the forest in the back of the house, “and I think the law states pretty clearly that you need my permission to hunt on it. And you’re not getting that permission if I don’t get to go with you.”

He smirked. “I doubt the state of California had goblins in mind when they made that law.”

She held up a second finger, ignoring him. “Item number two! You keep saying you work alone, but I’ve heard the rumors.” She leaned over and peered through the Chief’s darkened windows. “Are they true? Do you have a little pet in there that no one’s supposed to know about? Is he in the truck or did you leave him somewhere?”

The blood drained from Ollie’s face. “Excuse me?”

“Your little goblin. Yeah, I’ve definitely done my research, and not just on hunting. I’ve heard the same stories everyone else has about your family. You captured a goblin and you use it to help you hunt. Is that your secret? Is that why you’re supposedly the best?”

Ollie tried not to forcibly move her away from the vehicle. The doors were locked, he reminded himself. She couldn’t get in without him. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“That’s what the dogs were barking at earlier, isn’t it? You’ll take one of them with you, but not an actual human being?”

“Okay.” Ollie struggled to contain his anger. Not so much at her, as at the idiot blabbing on CoN about his family business. “I think we’re done here.” He stepped around her, back to the rear hatch. He wasn’t about to open the front door and give her the chance to peek inside.

“If you’re going to be completely intractable about this, then yeah, I think we are.”

“Intractable?” He stopped. “You’re putting this on me? You realize even if you fire me, I can come up here in the middle of the night, find the goblin on my own, destroy it, and you’d probably never even know.”

She shrugged. “Then I’ll call the police and have them keep an eye out for trespassers.”

He waved her off. “Don’t bother. I didn’t want to come to this stupid town anyway.” He opened the rear hatch and tossed the bag back inside. “It’s just a distraction from way more important business. Like taking a nap.”

He found his keys and struggled to re-open the lockbox. Just his luck he couldn’t fling the stupid thing open and storm off dramatically like he wanted. He’d told her the truth about this being a distraction. Maybe now he could get to his real reason for coming to California, and then go back to New Orleans, where he was appreciated. And paid.

“Wait.” Kimmie leaned against the back edge of the truck, her eyes downcast. “Just wait, please.”

He stopped. The tone of her voice was far less confrontational than before. Kimmie sighed heavily. “I’m sorry. That escalated quickly. I didn’t mean to get all worked up. I’m just… I’ve been really looking forward to this, and when you said no my stubborn streak kicked into overdrive. I’m not even sure why.”

Ollie suddenly remembered her aunt and uncle. This was personal for her. But it was personal for almost everyone he came across in this business. And he didn’t take them hunting, either. Well, not all of them. He did agree with her on one thing, though. This whole conversation had gotten way out of hand. Her determination and his bad mood had sparked a rager out of nowhere. That wasn’t usually like him.

Ollie shrugged. “Maybe it’s for the best. I know another hunter in town who isn’t a total idiot. I can have him come by and he can help you out. He’s more of a trapper than a hunter, so it might even be safer.”

“I don’t want another hunter. I picked you for a reason.”

“No. You picked my dad.”

She thought about that for a second. “True. But then I picked you.”

Ollie stared at her for a long time, long enough that it got awkward and they both looked away. He started to reach for the lockbox again.

“I’ll double your fee.”

Ollie cocked his head. “Sorry?”

“I’ll double it. But you have to take me with you.”

Ollie’s mouth snapped shut. She must have taken his silence as a negotiating tactic. Suddenly all of his die-hard rules became fluid as he considered the incredibly timely offer. With double the fee, he could take his time out here, look into the Arcata robbery, swing by Redding for a few uncomfortable hours, then take the long way back to New Orleans. Maybe even stay at some decent hotels. He blinked. Was he actually considering going through with this? He hadn’t done anything that dumb in a while, but something about her sucked away all of his common sense. Could he get her to triple the fee by keeping his mouth shut?

Before he could respond, the sound of a car rolling up the gravel road caught his attention. They both turned to see a Ferndale Police car approaching the house. He looked at Kimmie, bewildered.

“You already called them?”

She shook her head. “He’s a friend. He’s here for dinner.” She put her hand on his arm. “Act like we weren’t just yelling at each other like crazy people.”

The car rolled up behind Ollie’s Jeep and came to a stop. The engine and headlights turned off and a cop emerged from the driver’s side, somewhat young with an athletic build and blond hair. He had a crumpled brown grocery sack nestled in the crook of his arm.

“Kimmie?” he said.

“Andy! Hey! How are you?” She dropped her backpack at Ollie’s feet and walked over to give the cop a quick hug. Ollie bristled as he recognized the confused visage of Officer Allsome, who seemed to do the same for Ollie.

“I’m good. I brought some vegetables, courtesy of Aunt Ellie’s garden.” He gave Ollie a suspicious glare. “What’s going on?”

“Oh,” she turned to Ollie, biting her lip. “This is Oliver. He’s my new landscaper. We were discussing some changes to the ole’ back forty.”

Andy raised an eyebrow. “Landscaper?”

Ollie reached up and closed the rear hatch, suddenly very nervous about the items inside his truck.

“Yeah,” Kimmie said. “Hey! Dinner’s almost ready. Why don’t you come on in?”

Andy let his gaze linger on Ollie for a moment before flashing his winning smile at Kimmie. “I was hoping you would ask.”

She ushered Andy toward the door, then veered off to grab Ollie by the arm.

“You too, Oliver. There’s plenty of room at my dinner table.”

Ollie mentally debated making a run for it before deciding to check that impulse. He could wait out a stupid dinner. He let her drag him to the house, reminding himself that he didn’t usually make stupid decisions. Unless it was for money. Or a pretty girl. Just his luck he had both of them staring him in the face.