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Glitch
The hardest question of all

The hardest question of all

       LOGGING IN            

       INITIALIZING            

       LOADING            

After getting through several loading screens I hear the cliched voice of the ‘goddess of the world’. A beautiful voice with almost enough variation and fluidity to be mistaken as a human welcomed me.

“Welcome to the world of Esteria”

Some stars appeared to fall from above me and with a shimmering light, the ‘goddess’ appeared. She was almost 6 feet tall with long, straight green hair, hazel eyes, a face that i think i saw on a fashion magazine last month, large breasts, milky skin, and (obviously) not a single blemish of any kind. She was wearing a long red dress, a gold tiara studded with sapphires and silver bracers.

I wondered why every single VR game feels the need to greet the player with either a beautiful, large breasted goddess or nothing but little blue boxes. Not that i’m complaining about the eye candy, it’s just that after you see it 50 times, you start wanting a little variety. Why not a pixie or a dragon or something. As i was getting side tracked with my useless musings, the goddess asked the most difficult question i have ever faced.

“Choose your name”

This part always kills me. Especially since i always try to think up an original name for each character. A few minutes later i finally think of a good one.

“Shredder”

“Name already chosen, please choose again”

I was afraid of that. Time to break out the back up names.

“Shin”

“Name already chosen, please choose again”

“Scrub Lord”

“Name already chosen, please choose again”

and before you ask, yes i plan to make all of my choices start with ‘S’ and no i don’t have a good reason.

“Sniper”

“Name already chosen, please cho-”

“Silhouette”

“Name already chose-”

“Smaug”

“Name already cho-”

“Shriner”

“Name already chosen-”

Alright, time for the joke name. If this doesn’t get through i don’t know what will.

“Silly Nibblets”

“Name already c-”

“SERIOUSLY!?!?!”

“Name already chosen, please choose again”

~sigh

This could take a while. I seriously underestimated how popular this game would be and waiting 3 days after the launch day seems to have been a mistake. One more try. One last try before i go running to a dictionary. I WILL get an S name without a stupid xx__xx or numbers at the end. I take a minute to calm down and think of an uncommon, yet not idiotic name.

Unauthorized tale usage: if you spot this story on Amazon, report the violation.

“Scarab”

“Confirm your name ”

“Scale- I MEAN YES”

Phew, that took a lot longer than it should have.

“Select your race”

In front of me three mirror images of me appear wearing a plain brown shirt, pants, and shoes. One normal, one slightly thinner with pointy ears, and one shorter with a large bushy beard. There are only human, dwarf, and elf unlocked right now, though they promise more will be unlocked later either by players or through updates.

I never liked playing as a dwarf. While i can hide my ‘chubbiness’ (NOT FAT) more easily, dwarves are always slated to be warriors or crafters. I mean, what’s the point in playing in a world with magic and not getting to use it?

I also don’t like playing as an elf since their body types are always so thin and the limits of body modification in capsule games character creation are usually limited to facial features and about 20% of everything else. They say it’s to prevent people from tripping over themselves, but i just think they don’t like people that want to truly look like a different person.

“Human”

“Customize your appearance”

I play around a bit with the sliders and see how far they go. i end up sliding all of them to the left to make everything smaller and changing my hair color to navy blue.

“Choose starting location”

hmm. I didn’t think they would give me an option since i heard they didn’t get a choice in the Beta. Hopefully this means other things will be better too.

A map of a continent that looked suspiciously like Australia with some huge lakes and large islands off the coast appeared in front of me. Half a second later 15 white dots of varying size appeared on the map followed by 10 of them fading to gray. i guess this means there are 5 start locations for each race. I poke at the largest dot

Human Capital RayearthYesNo

I figure that since the AI was supposed to be the selling point i should go to the place with the most of them. I hit yes and am met with a blinding light.

____________________________________________________________________________________________

Authors corner**************

HELLO FELLOW PENGUINS

this is my first FF and my first time making TABLES

any constructive feedback is welcome (i have no excuse since i'm a native english speaker and i know i have problems with capitalization)

... ALSO-this chapter is brought to you by severe procrastination

I was planning on writing a different FF, but i procrastinated by writing this instead