Sofiane was dying very, very quickly. Shrike had drawn into yet another round of slapping down far too many creatures for Sofiane to deal with. His only tactic was to draw out the length of his turns and to make small talk to get into his opponent’s head.

“Can’t say I’ve ever heard of you. You’re a forgotten Hero, right?”

“Hmm? I suppose so. I’ve heard the term,” Shrike said, tapping his chin as he considered between two cards. “I don’t worry too much about it though. Money and numbers aren’t the most important thing to me.”

“Sounds like sour grapes to me,” Sofiane replied.

Shrike shook his head. “Hmm? My apologies if it came across that way, but really, I’m most happy when I’m with my friends. Adventuring and fighting the Entropic Axis and so forth are just a way to do that.”

Sofiane chewed the inside of his cheek. Shrike’s shell was tough to crack, but everyone had a weak spot. He just had to find it.

“You said your team kicked you out though. Aren’t those your friends?”

Shrike’s face darkened. “They were.”

Sofiane pictured Daisy in his hand firing a finger gun at him and saying “bullseye!”

“Why’d they ditch you? Not pulling your weight? Or maybe they just all secretly thought you were annoying and decided they were done with you,” Sofiane said.

Shrike hung his head, hand of cards going limp on the table. Even better, it was on his turn, so Sofiane didn’t even have to run out his own timer.

“I-I don’t… I don’t know. I want to think— but I just… I loved them so much, my friends, and I-I thought…”

Cards crumpled in Shrike’s trembling fist as thick droplets of tears rolled down his cheeks. People at the tables around them were all tutting silently or glaring at Sofiane for his cruelty. He suppressed a smirk at how well his gambit was going until, still sobbing, Shrike laid down a card that gave +1 damage to all of the Ninja monsters he had on the board and attacked Sofiane for half his remaining health.

“Let’s finish this game. I want to go curl up in a ball in the dark and cry in grief,” Shrike blubbered.

“Uh… hey, w-why don’t you tell me what happened? It’ll do you good to talk it through,” Sofiane said in a desperate attempt to stall for more time.

Shrike hiccuped and rubbed his tears away. “W-Well… it was a couple months ago, and we had just taken part in the Summer Water Gun Fight Special Event in Al-Nuwba—” Sofiane hated that one. Very moist, more sand than you would expect, a lot of rashes. “—and I got to the final round in the Free-For-All. I was so excited, it was just me and five other Heroes in a one-shot-one-kill, winner-takes-all battle royale. But when the fight was about to begin, I turned around to where they were supposed to be cheering from the crowd, and they were gone.”

Sofiane gave a fake gasp. “No! They really picked a moment of triumph to dump you on your ass and break your heart? Pauv petit! Such cruelty!”

Shrike put his head in his hands. “I-I couldn’t believe it either… but I thought maybe it was a mistake, right? So after I went out in 3rd place, I left the event to go look for them, and they were nowhere to be found! It’s been months since then, and after realizing I was now abandoned and set adrift by those who I cared for most, I buried myself in learning to play cards, though it has failed to fill the hole in my heart.”

If the Yishang ever made a special event competition for melodramatic monologues, Sofiane thought, this guy and Pechorin would be up against each other in the finals.

Looking around, he still didn’t see Pechorin and the rest of them back with a coup de grace trump card. All he could do was continue prodding at Shrike, hoping he would do something illegal to disqualify him.

“Wow. And you thought cards were the solution, huh? Sounds kinda pathetic to me.”

~~~

“How the hell do we find this guy’s stupid teammates? There’s a million friggin’ people in this city,” Natsuko said.

“Let’s not exaggerate, Natsuko, there’s not even a million people in the world even if you added up all of the Non-Heroes,” Shuixing said.

“Whatever! That doesn’t help us with— with this!” Natsuko said, flinging her arms out at the giant crowd of people swarming the plaza around the Heavenly Card Parlor. “We don’t even know his teammates’ names, or even who to ask for their names!”

“We know someone who would know,” Pechorin said.

“Who the—? No. Absolutely not. Screw that weird ass fox, we’re not asking him anything. I’d rather lose the card game,” Natsuko said.

Shuixing put her hand on her friend’s shoulder. “Natsu, we don’t have a lot of time and we really need to help Sofiane win. You don’t even have to talk to him, you can stand to the side while Pech and I talk with Zhidao.”

“Ugh! Don’t tell him anything he doesn’t need to know, okay? Not a peep about our little mission here,” Natsuko said.

Shuixing nodded.

Natsuko pointed at her. “I’m serious! I don’t trust him. Do not give an inch more than we have to.”

“I promise,” Shuixing said, knowing that agreeing was the only way she could get Natsuko to move past her weird phobia of the Pengwu fox. It was one of the many things about Natsu she’d given up being bothered by and now treated like a physical law.

“So… Where do we find Zhidao?” Pechorin asked.

“I know where to find that little shit,” Natsuko said.

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“No you don’t, you got lost last time,” Shuixing said with a sigh. “Let me ask around.”

Natsuko shook her head. “Won’t work. People in Tianzhou are tight-lipped, they don’t give out information for free. Believe me, I tried.”

Ignoring her, Shuixing tapped gently on the shoulder of a man pushing a cart full of steamed buns. “Pardon, sir, have you seen a Pengwu near here recently? He’s a fox with two halos and a peach coloration.”

“Oh, yeah, I did! He was floatin’ on his little cloud over to the harbor. Maybe he’s got business at the Cerulean Tower?” the vendor said as a joke. Shuixing wondered if it might be true. The Pengwu all seemed to have very wide circles of acquaintances.

“Much appreciated,” Shuixing said, putting a handful of Ying down on the man’s cart as payment.

“Xiexie,” he said with a nod.

“How the hell’d you do that!?” Natsuko said as Shui returned to her and Pechorin.

“It helps to not knock their merchandise over before asking,” Shuixing said.

Not knowing how much time they had left, they sprinted towards the harbor. Halfway down a narrow cobbled towards the seafront, a floating fox spirit met them coming up.

“Howdy friends! Fancy meeting you here,” Zhidao said, doing a little spin on his cloud.

Natsuko flared her nostrils and looked away.

“Still don’t like me, huh? You stinker!” Zhidao stuck his tongue out at her.

She flipped him off as she walked away. “Go fuck yourself. Fuckin’ spook.”

“Hey! That wasn’t very nice!” Zhidao pouted.

“Er, sorry Zhidao, Natsu’s not in a good mood,” Shuixing said.

“Is she ever?”

“Only on extraordinary occasions,” Pechorin said cryptically.

“Anyways, something I can help you guys with?”

“Yeah, actually,” Shuixing said. “Do you happen to know the teammates of a Hero named Shrike?”

“Sure I do! That would be Maitri, Benkei, and Felix, Use-Rankings #86, #89, and #94 in that order. How come you guys are looking for them?”

Shuixing gulped. “Ah, erm, we…”

“Are reuniting them,” Pechorin said. “Shrike lost his way and subsequently sunk into a deep depression which only reuniting with his old comrades can save him from.”

“How kind of you!” Zhidao said, wagging his tail. “I heard you guys entered the card tournament. How’s that going?”

“I-I’m sorry Zhidao, we don’t really have time. Do you know where we could find his teammates? Any chance they’re in Tianzhou?”

“As a matter of fact they are! I believe I saw them grinding out some fishing side-quests out on the dock. You’re looking for a big pole-arm user in monk’s robes, a shifty-looking redhead—besides the one you already have—in forest ranger gear, and a mage in yellow robes and veil.”

“Very helpful, thanks Zhidao!” Shuixing said.

“Don’t mention it!” Zhidao said, floating on towards the card parlor. A moment later he spun around on his cloud to face them. “Oh, and tell Natsuko to lay off the bottle.”

All three of them froze.

“You know.” Zhidao tilted an imaginary glass to his mouth with a paw. Shuixing chuckled awkwardly.

“Creepy fuck,” Natsuko muttered.

It wasn’t hard to find Shrike’s former teammates. In a sea of drab fisherman and guild merchant Non-Heroes, they were extravagantly-dressed highlighters of yellow, red, and green hunched over the end of the pier, rods dipped into the water. Five gallon buckets next to them overflowed with the common fish they were grinding through to find some special Tianzhou-only fish.

“Hey dorks! Hands off your poles, fishing time’s over,” Natsuko shouted, kicking over their bucket and sending fish all over the stone pier.

“What the hell is your problem!?” Benkei said, hopping to his feet. He had a foot or more on Natsuko and all of it was muscle. She smirked up at him.

Shuixing jogged to catch up. “Natsu stop!”

Natsuko put her hands on her hips. “You’re coming with us.”

“I’m sorry for my friend she—” Shui paused to catch her breath. “—makes poor choices.”

Benkei balled Natsuko’s kimono up in his fist and lifted her onto her toes. “Doesn’t she ever?”

This failed to wipe the smirk from Natsuko’s face which only made Benkei more frustrated.

“Does the name Shrike Biltmore mean anything to you all?” Pechorin asked.

“Uh… yeah? That’s our teammate who ran off,” Benkei said.

The mage in the yellow robes and veil, Maitri, folded her arms. “What about him?”

“You are called to his side.”

“We’re called? What? Would you all just explain what the hell you want?” said Felix.

Having finally gotten some air in her lungs, Suixing explained, “Shrike, your teammate, he’s playing in the card tournament.”

“He ditched us for cards!?” Benkei said, letting go of Natsuko.

“We thought you abandoned him,” Shuixing replied.

“No! We were watching him compete in that Summer Special Event with the water guns and after he lost, he left us behind,” Maitri said.

“That was months ago!” Felix said. “You’re saying he’s playing in that stupid card tournament now?”

Natsuko glanced at Shuixing. This wasn’t part of the plan. If they reunited Shrike with his teammates now, it would probably have the opposite effect and give him a morale boost. Both of them stammered trying to come up with a reason they shouldn’t go meet Shrike.

“You must come,” Pechorin said gravely. “Your friend needs you. I fear this has been a comedy of errors, and that a simple misunderstanding has sprouted into tragedy where the heart of a good man has been torn asunder, having been parted from those he holds dear.”

Natsuko slapped her forehead.

“Uh, yeah, we miss him too. Can you take us to him?” Benkei said.

They gathered up their weapons and joined Pechorin leading the way. Natsuko jogged up to his side.

“Way to go, dumbass. You screwed up the plan,” she whispered.

“Unfortunately, despite my callous and aloof exterior, some tragedies pierce me to the core. The cleaving of a man from his loved ones is one such example,” Pechorin replied.

It wasn’t long before they were back at the Heavenly Card Parlor. They found a bawling Captain Shrike Biltmore, head in his hands, sitting across a sneering Sofiane in front of a game that even Natsuko could tell Shrike was completely dominating.

“They don’t want you back, trust me. I know from experience. You have an eternity of loneliness ahead of you, kiddo. Best get used to it now,” Sofiane said.

“Shrike? What’s going on man? You okay?” Benkei said, jogging to his friend’s side.

“B-B-Benkei? Is that you? Felix? Maitri!? W-Why’d you all come here? I thought you hated me!”

“Of course not! We thought you ran off from us after the summer special event,” Maitri said.

Shrike knocked over his chair standing up and threw his arms around his teammates in a big teary-eyed hug.

Sofiane put his head in his hands. “We’re so fucked…”