Aperio noted with mild annoyance how everyone seemed to stand just a little bit straighter as she drew closer; as if they somehow expected her to perform an inspection. Or is it because of the weapon? Holding it felt natural to her, making it easy to forget that she was currently grasping something out of the ordinary in the eyes of the mortals in front of her. But then, Laelia also has a weapon I made and that doesn't seem to influence them.
Though, it had to be noted that the bow she had given her Scion lacked the blue lines that flowed along the haft of her swordstaff. It had been the same when Inanis had wielded it, as though the weapon itself was not wanting to be used by anyone but Aperio. They only really work for me, don't they? Perhaps it would work for her Scion with enough time — the woman did carry a large amount of her mana, after all. But is it really still my mana?
The obvious answer was yes. Everything was technically hers, even if only in a very literal sense. She had made the universe, but Aperio wouldn't claim she was the creator of every piece of art or anything of the sort. To claim that the blessing given to Laelia still belonged to Aperio wasn't quite right either. Yes, she could control the mana she had given away, but that was true for every bit of magic that existed. Probably.
Even if she could wrest control of the mana away from the one who had used it before, Aperio no longer considered it hers. She did not receive information from it like she did with her aura, and neither did it call to her to be used like the mana residing in her well. For all intents and purposes it was not hers, something she was more than fine with. Not that I would ever need to draw mana from someone else. I have more than enough.
She pushed the thoughts away as she arrived in front of the small group, letting go of her weapon and returning it to the Void. "Is there a reason everyone present is so… tense?"
The first to respond was Laelia who, after adjusting the bow slung across her shoulder, took a step forward. "You disappeared for a week, and answered neither Caethya's prayers nor my own. We were worried, my Goddess."
Aperio turned her head to face Ferio at the words, sending her a mental query with perhaps a bit too much force. Laelia's choice of words had struck a chord of panic in Aperio's mind. Did she tell them?
Her daughter was quick to deny Aperio's rather accusatory question, telling her mother that she had not revealed Aperio's history. The answer caused Aperio's wings to twitch in irritation. If they are unaware of my previous disappearance, why, then, did they worry? Do they think I am weak?
As silly as the notion was, it still managed to cause a bit of anger to bubble up inside her. I am not weak. Nor would she let anyone else think she was. She was no longer a helpless slave.
The voice of her daughter echoed through her mind, urging her to remain calm. Without Ferio's prompting, Aperio would never have noticed how the wisps of mana floating around her had started to increase, or how tiny arcs of energy had started to jump between the feathers of her slightly flared wings.
Aperio took a deep breath, the slightly sour smell of the city air not doing a great job of helping her maintain a grip on her sense of calm. They had been worried for her, not because she was weak and could not look out for herself, but because they cared. It was what she had wanted — that someone cared — and here she was completely ignoring that. She could blame it on the fact that nobody had cared before, but that felt like a cheap excuse; something she did not want.
"Thank you," Aperio finally said, her voice a lot softer than usual. "But there was no reason to worry. Healing them merely took a bit of time."
The hand of her daughter gently slipping past her wings and resting on her back caused Aperio to turn her head. Ferio's eyes were cast slightly downwards, the smile that usually graced her features somehow looking sad.
"Don't always assume the worst, mother," Ferio said, her words barely audible. "You might not see it just yet, but there are people that care. About you, not just because you are the All-Mother and they want your favour."
Laelia nodded at Ferio's words, the motion so subtle that Aperio barely noticed it. She heard her? It shouldn't have been a surprise; with the power her Scion had, she should be able to hear a few more things than a regular mortal. Probably could've done so before, too.
"Perhaps," Aperio replied. Though what her daughter had said was likely true, she still had trouble fully accepting the idea of people caring about her person and not just wanting to use the favor of the All-Mother for their own gain. The only one she could fully trust at the moment was her daughter, which perhaps meant that Aperio should take the words to heart a little more. But why should they care?
"What do you intend to do now, my Goddess?" Caethya asked, her gaze shifting rapidly between Aperio and the floor. Did I scare her?
Given that her disciple seemed to have shrugged off the way her Goddess had disappeared for a week, Aperio was led to believe that it was her small outburst that had scared the young Elf. The question Caethya had asked did cause Aperio to think, however. She had told Ferio about the things she wanted to do, but most of them had been grander goals that would take a while to accomplish.
What Aperio wanted to do right this moment was something she was still unsure about. She wanted to visit Maria, but the continued silence of the girl was a sign to the Goddess that her youngest follower did not want to see her. But what if something happened?
"I wanted to visit Maria again," Aperio replied, having made up her mind. "She is much like you, Caethya."
"Like me?"
"She, too, had her soul touched by me," Aperio replied.
Caethya remained silent for a brief moment, her eyes fixed on her feet, before she spoke again. "Are there more?"
The winged Goddess lightly shook her head in reply. "Laelia carries a different blessing. Maria and you are the only ones whose soul I personally touched."
"May I join you?" Caethya asked. "I would very much like to meet the other one you have blessed."
"Of course you are free to join," Aperio said, a smile settling on her lips — a reaction far outside of her usual composed demeanour. "I would also like Laelia to join us. Introducing you three to one another is something I should have done sooner." Not that I could have done so before...
It was something her followers did not need to know, however. They could think of her as the somewhat mysterious All-Mother for a little while longer. That she had no idea what she was doing half the time was something she would not tell them until she actually did know what she was doing.
"Shouldn't you address the world, my Goddess? Or, at least, this city?" Laelia asked. "You removed two of the most prominent Gods. The people still have questions."
This book was originally published on Royal Road. Check it out there for the real experience.
Aperio remained silent for a moment, thinking of an answer. She had hoped that she would not have to address anyone, that her accidental week-long disappearance would have been long enough to allow people to forget, or at least move on. That was a silly belief, wasn't it?
"And what do you expect me to tell them? That I killed their Gods for transgressions they would not understand?" Aperio sighed and shook her head. "I do not like taking an overly active role in the happenings of the worlds. I want to be left alone and not need to run after rebellious deities that think the rules do not apply to them.
"So I think, unless it becomes absolutely necessary, that I will not address everyone. The people will figure out who it was that killed their Gods soon enough on their own, anyway." Who she was and what she could do was not exactly a secret in the city, it was simply a matter of the people not yet choosing to believe that she could do what the rumours said she could.
Laelia offered a hesitant nod in reply. "I understand… I think. You don't want to orchestrate a public crusade against the deities that… rebelled? I am not quite sure what they have done, just that you are supremely angry at their actions."
Aperio's eyes narrowed her Scion's words and she took a step closer, the stone cracking beneath her feet. "Do you think what Vigil did to your soul was in any way acceptable?” Laelia blinked, startled, which brought further words to the Goddess' reprimand. "Did you think he was alone in his actions? That he was the only one who could do it?"
After she received a rather hesitant shake of the head from Laelia, Aperio continued. "He etched runes into your very soul. Servitude, Obedience and the like. I do not tolerate slavery in any form, and it would seem that some members of the pantheon need reminding.
"That said, I have no interest in involving legions of mortals. Only a few of you would be strong enough to be of use, and it is not your fight to begin with." Nor do I know how I would even rally people to my cause… Or if I would want to do that in the first place.
Aperio was fine with having a grand total of three followers. She did not need them to gain power, nor did she want their undying loyalty because they thought she would give them something if they prayed hard enough. If I ever bless anyone again, it will be because I like them.
It was perhaps a luxury the other deities did not have, but Aperio truly had no need for a legion to fight her battles. At least, I don't think so. The excitement that swelled within her at the idea of fighting an entire army on her own, the self-surety of the certain victory to follow, only furthered her belief. And if I ever did need help, I can ask Ferio, or Laelia and Caethya.
Maria was too young for a battle of any form, but her other two followers were stronger than most anyone she herself had seen. Though, how can Laelia only be level 230 and feel more powerful than Caethya? ...Is the level part of the System also broken? Once the question had been so clearly formed in her mind, a part of her instantly knew for certain that the levels were, indeed, not working as they should. As by now expected, this newfound knowledge did not come with an ability to fix the problem.
"Oh mother," Ferio mumbled beside her, removing the hand that had rested on Aperio’s back the entire time. "When will you learn to accept help?"
"How exactly are they supposed to help me?" Aperio asked, the irritation apparent in her voice. "You yourself were unable to fight another God in their Dominion."
Her daughter rubbed the bridge of her nose at Aperio's words. "Yes, they can't help you with the fight, but that is not the only thing they could do. Take Laelia here. She is a capable fighter, yes, but she also knows firsthand about Vigil's church. How it functioned. What it expected. She would be the perfect choice to help those who lost their God. Let her tell them what he did.
"You don't want to involve yourself too much, and I understand why, but someone has to be involved at this juncture. If not you, then someone that could at least ask you for clarification on issues they themselves can't answer."
Aperio's wings twitched slightly, a good part of her not liking that her daughter was giving her a lecture. She had no real reason to be angry of course, as what Ferio said was very much valid — good advice, even. It was just her inherent dislike of someone being better or knowing more than she did acting up again. Can't I just cut that part out?
"And what if something happens to her when she goes out and does something I told her to do? I am responsible for enough already, I do not want to be the one that sent someone on a trivial mission only for them to be killed by a vengeful lunatic."
"I doubt anyone in this city — besides your two followers themselves — could injure them, much less kill them. They might appear weak and fragile to you, but so does everything else," Ferio said with a sigh. "I know you don't want to depend on others, but haven't you done enough already? If you continue to do everything on your own, it will just play out like before."
A multitude of blue and silver arcs danced across Aperio's skin and wings as she turned to face her daughter. The world surrounding the two had darkened, Aperio's Void starting to leak into the mortal realm. "Nothing will be like before. I will not be a slave."
Ferio took a slight step back as the arcs of mana lashed out at their surroundings. "Calm, mother. I never meant to imply that. It’s just that you are starting to behave like you did before. You never let yourself be helped, would not even accept advice, even from me. I fear that if you do the same again, you will just turn three potential new Goddesses against you."
"If they are against me, they will not ascend," Aperio spat, her voice causing Ferio to wince slightly. "I will not be bound to anyone; to anything."
Ferio took another step back as the fury in her mother's eyes did not relent. "And I did not say that. Accepting help or delegating tasks does not bind you to them. I understand that the life you lived as a mortal was not pleasant, but that is finished. You are free now."
The winged Goddess remained unmoved, her eyes fixed on Ferio as the arcs of mana jumped between the feathers of her flared wings. The stone beneath her feet suddenly cracked as Aperio kicked off of it, rocketing into the sky.
As soon as she had pierced the dome of darkness, her Void retreated from the mortal realm. Aperio did not look down as she darted through the sky, only stopping when she was high above the city. She took a deep breath of the cold air, closing her eyes as she felt the world itself resonate with the rage that still flowed through her.
She did not know why, but the words of Laelia and Ferio had set something in motion, causing a looping chain of her most unpleasant memories to surface in her mind. How the nobles that had forced themselves on her had always told her how dependable she was, how they could not think of a world where they did not have such an obedient puppet.
She had left before she could do anything that she might regret. She couldn't help but recall the way she had felt her mana react to her emotional state, growing somehow sharper in the air. Recall how she could feel it spreading to Laelia, and to Caethya. They had told her before that they could feel her anger, but now that she had clearly witnessed it happening she could no longer shrug their concerns off. Why am I like this?
Why did she make the world depend on her? Everything connected to her, in one way or another. And yet, it still worked when I was gone? She shook her head, trying to free her mind from the train of thought that had started to form. It was not important right now. First she would need to calm herself.
Aperio flew upwards, soaring higher and farther until she reached the vast nothing beyond Verenier. Though she could have returned to her Void, and she sorely missed the calming effect it surely would have had, she did not want to become reliant on it. Running to her Dominion every time she got worked up about something didn't seem like a good idea. Not that this is much better.
She stopped beating her wings, simply spreading them out as she let herself drift through the nothing with a touch of magic. Her awareness of things other than herself opened up, and she noticed that the presence that had played with the wisps of her mana was back. This time it seemed more reserved, somehow managing to not approach her despite being woven into every bit of the inky black.
With a silent sigh Aperio closed her eyes again. While her body might have forgotten how to get tired, the same could not be said for her mind. Making sense of what her old instincts were telling her and what she actually remembered took quite a toll on her.
She had wanted to visit Maria, introduce the girl to the other two she had blessed so that they might be able to help one another should the need arise. But, instead, she had failed not only her daughter but the two followers she had.
Aperio did not like failure.
Despite the absence of sound, there was a silent whispering creeping up on the edges of her hearing. Immediately, Aperio opened her eyes and summoned her weapon. Against all logic, a formless shadow was taking shape in front of her. It was clearly the source of the whispering, as it grew louder as the entity coalesced.
It only took a little while longer before the countless voices called out as one, addressing the only person in the black nothing. "Welcome, Mistress."