The Fire Lord reborn eyed his enemy apprehensively, taking in the sharp point that skewered right through the middle of the flesh, and the deceivingly innocent pastel colours that hid the evil lurking beneath.

"You… why are you doing this?" Zuko asked pleadingly.

He shifted his limbs, making sure he kept his arms pinned at his sides in an attempt to stop himself from reaching out.

"I know your game," Zuko accused his foe. "It's so obvious even a child would see it."

Despite the trap that the Uchiha heir knew was there, it didn't stop him from sending a longing glance at the bait dangled so temptingly in front of his nose.

In his previous life, the prince had never understood Sokka's obsession with meat, or his Uncle Iroh's obsession with good tea. After spending far too long in their company, Zuko had come to scorn the near addiction they'd had for their respective fixations. The consequences of Sokka going a length of time without meat were downright frightening.

It had been six years after the end of the war; they had been in the Earth Kingdom tracking down rumours of a troublesome spirit and had gotten stuck in a cave that seemed to be barren of life. Even worse than the fact that they couldn't find the exit and Toph wasn't with them to help, was the fact that Sokka had eaten all the dried jerky.

They had suffered three horrifying days with Sokka going through a 'meat withdrawal', and by the last day, Sokka had been eyeing them speculatively. Zuko had honestly feared he may get desperate enough to try and eat them, so great was his desire for meat.

Therefore, it was understandable that Zuko was torn between disbelief and shame for discovering that in this life, he too had an addiction.

That's right. He, Fire Lord Zuko, the man who had helped end a hundred-year war had been defeated.

By dango.

Oh, if his Uncle or Sokka could see him now. After all the times he had mocked them for their unhealthy eating habits, he now found himself unable to resist those tiny, sweet, colourful dumplings.

Karma truly is a bitch. No one understands this better than Zuko.

The Uchiha eyed the green, white and pink dumplings on his plate, before unclenching his hands. Seemingly of their own accord, one arm shot forward and snatched up the wooden skewer, bring it to his mouth.

"Just one more," Zuko said determinedly, before biting off the first one and closing his eyes in ecstasy.

The texture was perfect for chewing and savouring without being overly sticky, and although he hadn't been a fan of sweet things before, in this body it seemed that they were his Achilles heel.

Before he knew it, the dumplings were gone, and Zuko mournfully placed the empty skewer in the growing pile to his side. His cousin sat opposite him in the teahouse and was staring in horrified wonder at the wooden skewer heap.

"By the gods!" The words tore themselves out of Shisui's mouth. "How in the world did you eat all of that sugar?"

Shisui counted the sticks swiftly, before facing him with utter shock on his features.

"Seventeen. Holy shit Itachi, you've eaten fifty-one dango! Why aren't you throwing up by now?"

Zuko set down his tea and tore his gaze away from the plate of dango on the neighbouring table.

"Throw up? Dango? How could you suggest such a thing?" The younger Uchiha was appalled.

"Um… Sir?" The waitress timidly approached their table and once again picked up the empty plate. "Would you like another?"

She too, eyed him like he was an alien masquerading as a child. Which come to think of it, he kind of was.

Zuko smiled politely at her, reluctantly shaking his head. "No, thank you, I believe I've had enough for today."

"Oh thank the Sage," Shisui muttered under his breath, pre-emptively weeping over his wallet.

"Itachi, I know I said I would treat you as a graduation gift, but did you really have to eat so much?" his cousin sulked as he placed bills on the table.

Zuko patted his mouth with a napkin and settled back into the wooden chair with satisfaction, comfortable with his full stomach and the pleasant atmosphere of the traditional tea house.

"Of course, what kind of ninja would I be if I didn't take advantage of such a situation?"

Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

Glinting on his forehead was the Konoha headband, proof that he was indeed now a ninja, Zuko having earned it just that day.

All good things come to an end, and Zuko should have known that his shadow clone would eventually be discovered, even if he had hoped otherwise. Thankfully the teachers had been more impressed than angry, and they had bumped him up to the graduating class instead of giving him detention.

If he'd known that would be their reaction, Zuko would have gotten caught sooner. No more six-year olds! The one week he had spent in the classroom in person was more than enough, and the faded memories of his clones only enforced that notion.

"Looking forward to missions?" Shisui asked as they left the dango shop and moved onto the bustling paved streets of the village.

Zuko shrugged languidly. "I suppose. It'll be nice to see what's outside of Konoha, and it'll definitely beat sitting in a classroom."

Shisui's mouth curved up into a wicked, wicked grin. "Oh, I'm sure it will," he said, his voice thick with suppressed amusement.

Zuko eyed his cousin warily, he knew that tone. More often than not he was the victim of his cousin's pranks and attempts to, 'lighten him up' since he sometimes acted, 'too much like an old geezer.' Wow. Zuko wondered why.

There was something coming for him, some unmentionable misfortune. He didn't know what, or when, but it was going to be messy, humiliating and bring Shisui vast amounts of enjoyment at his expense.

He was really not looking forward to it.

----------------------------------------

To Zuko's complete lack of surprise, great misfortune did indeed befall him before too long. What was surprising was that it wasn't Shisui's promised misery, but rather it was his own actions that caused the situation.

That last fact was not at all unexpected, as there seems to be a law that in every life Zuko will be the main cause of his own suffering.

It had started with the noblest of intentions and innocent curiosity.

The Uchiha heir had recently learned of a C-rank wind jutsu and was anxious to test it out, hoping that it would accelerate his wind elemental chakra training if he knew what using a regular jutsu was like.

He had mastered the Gale Palms pretty quickly, and for the first time in his life Zuko had gotten a sense of what it was like to use wind. It was pretty amazing, but the jutsu was a simple expulsion of air, just a taste of what was to come and nothing like the complex manipulations Aang had been capable of.

Still, it had been fun to play around with, and that was when the idle thought of combination jutsu came into his mind. It was common knowledge that fire and wind jutsu used together multiplied the power and force, and Zuko was pretty keen to see it himself. He was curious as to whether he could fire bend with chi and cast a technique with chakra at the same time.

In a simple word – yes. He could. Although now that he knew it was possible, the question changed from could he, to should he.

And Zuko was leaning towards no for the answer to that because holycrap he was so lucky that he'd been at a training ground near the Uchiha compound, close to the walls of the village and not nearer the centre of Konoha.

What had resulted was nothing like normal fire bending or regular fire jutsu.

Zuko had started sensibly. The C-rank wind jutsu and a small breath of fire had caused a decently sized fire blast, the fire and wind had indeed combined to make the jutsu more akin to a B-rank technique instead. This was the point where his excitement had overtaken him and his already tenuous hold on common sense had slipped.

He had then tried the combination again, but this time he wanted to see what he could create if he was really trying.

Pouring chakra into the technique, he had focused hard and breathed out white-hot flames, hotter than even Azula's had ever gotten.

(Was it petty that he felt satisfaction at that fact? Probably. Did Zuko care? Nope.)

The resulting explosion had been a veritable storm of flames, the heat so intense the air sizzled and dried, the white fire scorching the trees, causing the water inside them to evaporate so quickly that the trunks burst and splintered, those wooden splinters then turning to ash.

The wave of fire spread out swiftly, carried by the howling winds, chi and chakra combining to create an unholy tide of destruction before proceeding to decimate everything in sight. And when he said everything in sight, he meant everything.

The heat rippled forward, through the entire training field and beyond, until it crashed into the tall Konoha stone walls that wrapped around the entire village, the flames curling upwards now that it couldn't go onwards, white pillar pushing up into the sky.

Zuko panicked at the unexpected intensity and cut the wind and fire instantly, the roar dying down and the burning white light fading so he could once again see without squinting. When his vision recovered, he could do nothing more than stare, transfixed in horrified fascination as the flames dissipated and he took in the blackened walls where once there was pale stone. The entire section where the fire had struck was completely black, covered with soot and smoking. But even worse than that was the training field in front of him.

Every single tree was gone, vanished like they had never existed at all. And at his feet, the dirt had disappeared, replaced by charcoal and ash, the once green field entirely grey. The only spots of colour to be seen were the red-hot glowing rocks dotted about, some of them melting even as he gaped.

Shit

The thought rose unbidden and as soon as it occurred, Zuko thought it was not nearly emphatic enough for such a huge disaster.

The first people to arrive – unsurprisingly – were the Uchiha that were currently in the compound.

"Itachi –!" was all that came out of the mouth of one of his clansmen until he cut himself off to join Zuko as they gawked, mesmerized, at the desolation in front of them.

Shit

The next to appear were the nearby jounin who materialised in a flurry of leaves, all of them bristling and on guard. They took in the scenery – or what was left of it – as well as the group of Uchiha, the smallest of whom was covered in soot and had a smoking shirt, the edges having caught fire from the radiated heat of the technique.

"Shit." This one slipped out, mumbled so quietly as Zuko's mouth came back online.

But before the Konoha jounin could do more than take in the destruction, there was a loud crack! A sonic boom sounded as the Hokage arrived and the air parting belatedly for him. Close on his heels were his ANBU guards, crouched and menacing, radiating killing intent.

"Shit."

This one was louder, and all eyes turned to him, their heavy gazes demanding answers as Zuko awkwardly patted down his still burning shirt and smoking hair.

"Um," he gulped. "It was an accident?"