"Sir! Sir!"
Jayln groaned as the knocking woke her. She shifted and the back of her head pushed Matius's chin. He sat up. "What-huh?"
"Sir!" Another rap. Jayln detangled her legs from Matius's as he stumbled to the door. He opened it revealing the white robed apprentice. "Sir, he's moved. I think he's awake."
Matius thanked the girl and shut the door, straightening his robes. Jayln ran a finger through her hair, her mouth was dry and she went to the small kitchen to down a cup of water quickly. Matius snapped his fingers and two apples popped into existence above him. He caught them, tossing her one. "Alright, let's go."
The apprentice was waiting by Fenrin's cell, bouncing nervously. "He started making weird noises," she whispered and Jayln opened the door quickly.
Fenrin was where they had left him, laid out on the bed. His eyes were open and he was breathing heavily. At the sound of the door he growled, "Finally here. Whatever you do to me, I'll give back tenfold. These chains won't hold me forever."
Jayln looked to Matius. "I thought you removed the spell when we put him in here?"
"I did," Matius said waving a hand before frowning. "There's nothing binding him."
Fenrin laughed. "Then why can't I move?"
Matius stepped closer to the bars peering at Fenrin, who hadn't so much turned his head to look at them. "If I had to guess, I'd say your muscles have seized up. How do you feel?"
"Like I'm on fire," Fenrin barked, "is this another sick experiment then?"
Matius stepped back. "What? No of course not. No one here wants to hurt you, I don't know what you remember but Niv's been destroyed. It will just take time to heal whatever it was she did to you."
Fenrin didn't answer, just lay quietly until finally Jayln spoke up, "Fenrin. It's me, Jayln. It's really alright now."
"Jayln!" The name came between the bars like a curse. "No wonder, you do love locking me up. We're doing this again then? Well it won't end any better than last time."
"What are you talking about?" Jayln frowned.
Matius waved a hand and the cell door opened, he walked through and stepped closer to Fenrin. His hands glowed golden and Fenrin flinched, his breathing quickening.
"Easy," Matius said softly, "let me help."
"I've had enough magic," Fenrin hissed but Matius continued his ministrations. His golden hand moving out from in front of Fenrin's face.
"See if you can move now."
Fenrin blinked and flexed his hand. He groaned and sat up, looking himself over. His face was wary but when he finally got a good look at Matius, it changed into rage.
"You!" He stood up menacingly and Matius took a step back. "You left me!" He reached out to grab Matius, but the mage floated back, toes skirting the floor. Matius whisked himself behind the door and it blew shut.
"Easy," Matius said again, hands held up, "I told you I'm not here to hurt you, but you need to calm down."
His words seemed to have the opposite effect. Fenrin's face contorted, he grabbed the bars and roared, "You tricked me! It's your fault! Your fault!"
The bars rattled but held firm as he shook them. Snarling, he reached a hand through trying to get Matius. "Do you know what they did to me!? Do you? I'll show you! I'll repeat every damnable act on you. The burning, the pain, the knives!"
"Fenrin!" Jayln stepped in front of Matius who was stunned by the ferocity directed at him. Fenrin didn't take his eyes off Matius and Jayln tried again, "Fenrin! Matius is here to help. He didn't abandon you, you saved us remember?"
Fenrin stopped screaming, instead stepping back and crouching like an animal.
"I remember," he said softly. "I remember the pain, the darkness, the never ending darkness."
Hissing, his hands clawed at his forehead. "This is a trick. Another trick. More pain. I won't break. No. No matter what. I'll get them back. I'll make them bleed. Bleed and choke and die. Hunt them down like animals. Hunting and hunting..."
His words grew more mangled and he gave a crazed laugh, his eyes staring at the ground. One hand still clawed his forehead drawing blood, the other white and gripping the bars.
Jayln turned to Matius who shook his head, looking sadly at Fenrin. "Go get him something to eat, I'll see if I can talk him out of this."
Matius glanced back at Fenrin who was beginning to list the things he would do to 'them'. He set his jaw. "Promise me you won't go in there."
Jayln nodded. "It's not my first time dealing with the caged wolf," she said dryly and Matius slipped out of the room. Jayln moved forward, crouching just out of what she knew Fenrin's reach was.
"Fenrin, talk to me. I want to help you."
His grey eyes peered at her, sizing her up. "Help," he repeated with disdain.
"Yes, don't you remember me?"
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He winced, his nail drawing blood again as he scraped his forehead. He gave a dark chuckle. "I remember. I remember why you know exactly how far away to stand. I remember you locking me in a dark room. Waiting to see if I'd break. Watching and waiting just like her."
Jayln frowned. "Her? Niv?"
He thrust his face between the bars and gave her a toothy grin. "Yes, Niv. Mistress of darkness. Of pain. Oh she knows pain. Knows where to put it." His expression grew blank again and he shuffled back his hands dancing on his chest. "How many? One? Two?" He chuckled.
His fingers landed on white scars until he said triumphantly. "Eight! It was eight until she grew bored. Tearing, feeling, her hands wet with my insides. Dragging them out before her rats shoved them back in, keeping me awake, alive, screaming."
Fenrin looked at Jayln who was pale faced and grinned. "So many ideas. So many things I can try now. Or maybe burning. That was a favorite. A hot metal cage. Or just a random poke to make sure you're still breathing."
Jayln flinched as a hand touched her shoulder. Matius's face was stern. "That's enough," he said softly. He slid the plate of food closer to the bars and Fenrin gave him a look of such hatred it made him flinch. "We're leaving."
Fenrin gave him a predatory grin. "So soon? I have so much to tell you. I want you to know what's coming..."
Matius grabbed Jayln's arms and pulled her out of the room. He shut the door and threw his arms in the air. "Tell me that's not normal! If that's the man you risked your life for, I—I—" he stuttered and gestured frustrated at the cell door. Jayln rubbed an eye and took a shaky breath.
"No, that's not normal. Even at his worst, he wasn't...well he was violent but now he's..." She rubbed her eyes again, irritated. "She made him worse. She broke him—"
The tears trickled out and Matius took her into his arms. She hugged him tightly, her frustration and sadness flowing out. It felt like she'd been tricked, like someone had moved the finish line.
"He said I was like her," she muttered into Matius's robe and he pulled away, looking her in the eyes.
"Well, then clearly he is mad."
Jayln chuckled and then her eyes widened. "That's it! His mind!" Matius raised an eyebrow and Jayln smiled. "That's what they do right? Get inside the mind and tear it apart. But you can fix that—just like Yu'jana."
Matius frowned, his voice cautious, "Maybe. It's true that there are spells to help, but it's not anything sure. Even the Arch Mage is uncertain how much he'll be able to recover. He has to connect with her mind and help her sort out the damage and Yu’jana was only hit once."
"But can't we try the same with Fenrin? Find out what she did to him and fix it? Help clear the darkness?"
He looked at her earnest face and sighed. "You're not going to give up are you?"
Jayln took his hands. "I don't want to leave him like this. I know he might not be able to recover, that...maybe it's over. But," she glanced at the door, "no one deserves that."
"I'll talk to the Arch Mage." He turned to the young girl still standing by the door. "What's your name?"
The girl grinned to be addressed and gave a quick bow. "Fa'raz at your service, Third Apprentice."
"Alright Fa'raz, if you don't have any other obligations, would you be guard here? Whatever you do, do not let anyone but Jayln, the Arch Mage, or I through those doors. And whatever you hear, do not go inside. Do you understand?"
Her dark eyes widened but she nodded solemnly. "You have my word."
"Thank you." Matius turned back to Jayln. "Why don't you get a real meal in you while I talk to the Arch Mage."
Jayln wanted to object but she knew Matius was trying to find a nice way of getting rid of her since the Arch Mage didn't much like her tagging along. So she agreed and Matius left to go upstairs while she returned to his apartment.
She put on the kettle and cracked some eggs on a hot pan. While it cooked, she wandered over to the library-turned-bedroom and opened a drawer, pulling out a letter. Jayln tucked it in her pocket and returned to the kitchen where the smell of the egg made her stomach growl in anticipation. Matius's apples were delicious, but a bit sour and sat poorly on an empty stomach. She gratefully plated the eggs and as she chewed she pulled out the letter, staring at it.
Jayln had written it a week ago after Matius's dozenth offer to send a message back to her village. It was addressed to her father and recounted everything that had happened but she couldn't bring herself to send it. It felt too much like an apology. An admission of failure. I'm sorry but I'm coming home.
She knew her father, her village, no one would blame her. They'd welcome her back with open arms, grateful she was okay. When she had set out, she had been so poised. The future leader of the village, going to tame the Wolf and use him to secure her people's future.
It had taken very little time before Jayln lost that sense of comfort. She'd had to struggle to keep up, to understand what was going on, she'd even had to stand up for what she believed at risk of her life. It had made her realize how much she could grow and be.
When she'd entered that valley with Fenrin, she was a different person than the woman who had left her village. She was stronger, more confident, and more capable.
Jayln didn't feel like that woman anymore. She felt like less than what she had left as. Her confidence was shaken, she'd been able to do nothing to save Anwen, nothing to save herself, and nothing to save Fenrin. She'd failed to secure a safe future for her people and the only thing she'd learned was how much more dangerous the world was than she'd thought.
Tossing the letter to the other side of the table, Jayln let herself wallow in self pity. She glanced around and her eyes fell on a stack of books, crooked from where one had been pulled out of the middle, now resting open on top of the stack. It was a book about transmutation from one of the many nights Matius had attempted to explain magic to her.
She smiled at the memory. He'd been so frazzled by her disappointment that apples were the only thing he could make from thin air. He'd launched into an explanation of how air transmutation to living matter was thought to have been impossible and how that was his biggest breakthrough. She’d smiled and watched him passionately explain the hardships he'd gone through to make that spell work.
After he paused to catch his breath, she'd cocked her head and asked simply, "Why an apple?"
He'd stopped and gotten that sheepish smile she loved so much and told her it was the only living matter he'd had at the moment to study and then prodded her asking her what she had against apples. "Nothing. It was a delicious apple, much better than any apple I've ever created from thin air."
He'd laughed and she'd felt happy for the first time since the valley.
Jayln glanced at the letter. She had to go back. She had a responsibility. She bit her lip, letting herself think the thought she'd been keeping at bay.
Fenrin is just an excuse to stay.
It was a horrible thought and she wanted so desperately to believe that she wanted to help Fenrin more than anything just because it was the right thing to do but it was a lie. She did want to help, he didn't deserve what had happened, but he wasn't her responsibility, her village was. Jayln couldn’t run away from home forever.