Chapter 109: I Didn’t Sell My Soul
Nara wanted to get back to what adventurers did: slay monsters, help people out, and hone their skills. Sen was right: she needed some dedicated rest and, more importantly, therapy. She and Redell often sat at the bank of the small lake in the church of the healer grounds, discussing what had happened during her imprisonment.
“Sometimes,” Nara began, her hands fiddling with her shirt in her lap. “I still feel like this is a dream. That, I’ll turn around and someone will ask me to enter a portal. The fact my world doesn’t have magic doesn’t help, and my own weird wacky timey-whimey experiences in the astral has made it worse. I feel like my grasp on reality is slipping away. It scares me. I don’t know what to do, if I can ever feel grounded again.”
“Your Astral Domain recenters you. Visit it often. You feel that you are aware of your own soul and situation there?”
“While I’m there,” Nara clarified. “It sort of fades once I leave.”
Nara sat at the banks, wiggling her toes in the water with Thanatos stretched out across her lap like a supermassive cat. The clergy walked in measured even steps through the grounds, often carrying baskets of medical supplies. The church of the healer ran a clinic where they healed injuries and cleansed afflictions. For the poor, it was free. They additionally created and sold potions, and funded alchemical research. Churches often served like universities or research institutions dedicated to a specific study and profession. Universities did exist on Erras as well, although the framework of education varied greatly nation to nation, and universities specializing in specialized education usually received donations from the corresponding church. Sanshi’s Adventure Academy had patrons in Warrior, Hero, Traveler, and Knowledge.
“There was this girl, Lina. She was one of The Adventists—not really. She was an Illusae.”
“They had managed to infiltrate into The Advent? I’m surprised to hear that.”
“I can’t imagine spending you entire life deep uncover like that. I don’t know if that was her entire life. Maybe she saw a chance to replace someone there, and took it.”
“What about this young woman, Nara?” Redell asked, gently redirecting the topic.
“She uh…died. I was dreaming of our rescue. It was a very realistic dream. You, Amara, and Laius were there. Not Chelsea, for some reason. Amara went off to fight Raina while you and Laius handled the evacuation.”
“It’s startingly similar to what happened,” Redell admitted.
“Fight was more one-sided in real life. Is there that big of a difference in gold rank?”
Redell maintained his concerned smile, and kept silent, waiting for Nara to continue.
“Anyway, we left the astral space in a skimmer, and Laius conjured up a portal. I was about to go through it. Inches away. If I leaned forward, my nose would have kissed it. At the last moment, she pulled me back from it. For that, I have no doubt she was killed for it.”
“You didn’t see her die?”
Nara shook her head. “…Did they find her body?”
“We did. The Adventure Society confirmed with Zariel that it was her. They have a way to identify their own, even transformed and in death.”
Nara shook from the confirmation, wiping a few stray tears. Redell comfortingly squeezed her shoulder, his hand just as warm and reassuring as it always was.
“I couldn’t understand why she would help me. I’m a selfish person,” Nara said. “I’m not worth anyone’s life in exchange.”
“The equality of lives is a good value to hold,” Redell reasoned.
“Idealistically, maybe,” Nara conceded. “And Adventurers are told pretty regularly not to die in the line of duty.”
“And they are rightly told not to. Adventurers cannot save everyone.”
“Yet,” Nara said, soft and slow. “This world has a god of Heroes. Redell, what is it he does?”
“Remembers the sacrifices of those who have paid the ultimate price to save others,” he said. “You don’t need to be a hero Nara, to feel like your life has value.”
“It would be a good way to go. A blaze of glory. Indisputable good. A hero.”
Nara wondered if Lina’s real name would be sung in Hero’s choirs and written upon his walls. Maybe she would check to see if it was.
*****
Redell watched Nara, concerned with her general listlessness and ruminations over the meaning of self-sacrifice. The string of energy and tension that had been pushing her through her suffering had snapped, draining her of all her energy. She was a kite with a cut string, drifting aimlessly where the wind took her. The young woman that once held a curiosity for the world around her realized too clearly its dangers. It was as a person had discovered they were now allergic to their favorite food. Her eyes would light up with joy with the mention of a new magic, a curiosity, or a cultural quirk, before the light would fade, now muddied with wariness.
When asked about her motivation to return to Earth, Nara responded that she would do her best for John. It was no longer her motivation, Redell realized.
She was afraid of what would happen if she introduced magic to a magic-less world. She may believe it was better if she never returned; the troubles that followed her kept on Erras where they were born instead of migrating to her old world.
Redell’s observations were conducted in secret. No one would notice him, after all, unless he wanted them too.
She seemed mostly normal. She participated in training with her usual gusto. She still made improvements to her essence abilities and fighting style. She watched Eufemia’s plays and listened to orchestral music. In the mornings, as usual, she ventured to the park to play her lute. She practiced aura training with Laius once again, retraining what had once again grown in strength.
Everything was too normal. For an outworlder that had just suffered unending delirium and pain for two weeks, it was all too normal.
“I am not sure how to approach this, my god,” Redell ruminated. “Beyond the signs of grief and lost ambition, something else seems to be wrong.”
“And what do you think is wrong?” Healer said, standing beside Redell.
“She seems too normal and regulated. From the beginning she said she was adaptable, but this feels like an adaptation in the wrong direction.”
“What do you think she is adapting too?”
“I am not sure, Healer.” Redell gave him a rather frustrated look over Healer’s repeated deflecting inquiries. Healer only smiled in response; of course he did, Redell knew his god well.
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“She is trying to be normal.” Healer suggested. “She has realized that exceptions bring unwanted attention.”
In the past Nara had said she did not enjoy attention, although now she more deeply understands the consequences of it.
Redell gave his god a disapproving look, “All people are exceptional.”
“Don’t look at me like that,” Healer said with a chuckle. “It’s not entirely true, nor should it be. She is right; Not everyone wants to stand out. Most want to live ordinary lives. Many adventurers are ordinary, as far as adventurers can be ordinary.”
“There’s nothing wrong with that,” Redell sighed, agreeing.
“But it is too late for that, for her,” Healer said. “As she suspects, her return to her world will likely be more excitement that she’ll appreciate.”
“Isn’t it fine? She should feel normal for a while. That is an objective of recovery.”
“Exactly, Redell! Her outlook on life has changed, as it should after such an experience, and will continue to change over time. So why are you in such a rush?”
Redell grumbled.
“Now, don’t be like that.” Healer folded his arms, looking off into the distance at something even Redell couldn’t perceive. “She has good people with her, including one of my high priests.” You, was left unsaid. “She’ll be fine.”
*****
Nara knocked on Aliyah’s door in Encio’s suite.
“Come in.”
Aliyah was relaxing on her balcony with a book, an astral magic one, no doubt. In the past Aliyah read books non-stop. It was as if her fervor for learning had been renewed by her revival.
“What’s the matter, Nara? You seem concerned.”
“So, when I was retrieving your body…” Nara paused, the incident was still fresh, and any discussion still rubbed her raw.
“Go on,” Aliyah encouraged.
“I accepted this blessing. From something called Legion.”
“Can I see?”
Nara showed her.
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Racial Ability: [Soul Legion]
Language adaptation. Essence, awakening stone, and skill book absorption. Immunity to identification and tracking. Resistance to dimension-restriction effects. This is a legacy effect of [Free Spirit].
Transfigured from [Free Spirit] by [Blessing of Legion].
A portion of all familiars are kept within your soul even when familiars are not subsumed. This allows you to use effects and abilities granted by familiars as if they are subsumed and telepathically communicate with them from any distance. When familiars are subsumed, their subsumed effects have increased effect.
Your body is considered your territory. Your territory is hostile to enemies that trespass within it, damaging them in the process. Your subsumed familiars may attack foreign entities within your territory. The attacks and damage of your familiars when attacking foreign entities is based off of their characteristics. You can control the strength of this effect or disable it. This effect applies to any object or territory connected to your soul. This effect shares your ability to ignore rank disparity.
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“Did I make a deal with the devil or something? After all that, did I accidentally sell my soul?”
“I don’t know what the devil is Nara,” Aliyah tone tinged with humor over Nara’s shiftiness. “But you have not sold your soul.”
“That’s a relief…Except, the concept of selling your soul exists here? In a world of magic that’s, like, extremely concerning.”
It really was. If Nara had accidentally made a deal she could not back out of in the heat of the moment, especially after she had been fighting for a week to keep her own autonomy, it would’ve all been very pointless, Lina’s and Aliyah’s sacrifice all for naught.
“Legion is one of the Great Astral Beings. It is one that governs life, although not much is known about it. We have less records of it than the others: The Reaper, the World Phoenix, The Builder, and The Celestial Book are known for their cults that follow their will, and therefore propagate it.”
And the Weaver of Dreams, Nara thought.
Nara had a contentious relationship with dreams. Both her first initial ‘soul away’ during her sleep, and her toxin induced delirium dreams from the nightmare beetle.
“Occasionally, the Great Astral Beings bestow their blessings upon those they appreciate. This can be those they find agreeable, or even enemies they respect.”
“Which one would I be?”
“You can’t guess?”
“I don’t think I pissed it off. I hope I didn’t piss it off.” Nara certainly has not tried to piss off or attract the attention of any outer gods and inner gods, but it does seem to happen more than she appreciates.
“Then Legion appreciated your tenacity to live.”
“I don’t really think I have a tenacity to live,” Nara said.
“Why?”
Nara broke eye contact with Aliyah.
“I definitely tried to bash my head in a few times. It didn’t work,” she said, voice cracking, “The whole…no brain thing. I couldn’t do enough damage to myself before the shackles healed it. My first thought while I was suffering…was that I wanted it to end.”
“That’s pretty normal,” Aliyah said, although her fists clenched as she responded to Nara’s pain.
“What?” Nara’s voice rose an octave in her doubt.
“There are plenty of strange magic beasts, plants, animals, and toxins that inflict a pain that most people would rather die than suffer through. An unlucky traveler stumbles upon a fluffer…Usually, they have enough sense to go to a healer priest and have the issue removed before they decide to end themselves. John may have encountered a few himself by now.”
“A fluffer?” You call an animal which inflicts a pain so extreme that people would rather die a fluffer?”
“It is rather fluffy. Small and round, like a puffball, and extremely docile.” Aliyan moved her hands to demonstrate. “You almost want to pick it up and give it a fluff. Children are warned away from it. It would be a great pet…alas.”
“If not for the suicide inducing toxin, sure.”
“Returning to the topic at hand, the blessing of a Great Astral Being is not like that of a god’s divine essence. There is no cost to accepting the blessing. Your soul is not under any undue influence.”
“A divine essence?”
“I suppose you are unaware. Gods grant divine essence to their followers, should they choose to receive it. Although, most adventurer priests like Redell do not accept a divine essence.”
“Huh.” Nara didn’t know what to make of that. “Why not?”
“The god may choose to remove the divine essence at will.”
“And that’s bad?”
“Extraordinarily. If you are silver rank, then the attribute bound to the divine essence returns to normal rank. The higher your rank, the more disastrous the consequences. Attributes require balance; without it, your power is uncontrollable.”
“Why accept them at all then?”
“Divine essences have more powerful abilities and gods can bestow divine awakening stones to awaken a specific ability.”
“Ah…,” Nara realized, “You worship a god to break free of the god of RNG.”
“…The god of what?” Aliyah asked, unduly intrigued.
*****
Nara hadn’t sold her soul to save Aliyah; that was good. Nara was made aware, however, that she would likely act with extreme recklessness in times of crisis. But what else could she have done?
Legion.
It was a Great Astral Being Chrome was unfamiliar with, except for knowing its name. Why had it offered its blessing in her hour of need? Without Chrome’s directive, Nara would not have that singular goal driving her. It was but the smallest action which preserved Nara’s mental willpower.
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Title: [Unyielding]
The damage you suffered in your stand against a much more powerful enemy has marked your soul. Your resistance to the suppressive force of higher-ranked auras and other forms of external suppression is increased.
Your aura signature has changed. Your unflinching resolve can be detected if your aura is examined by an aura sensing power or when projecting your aura.
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The new title felt a mockery of her. Nara didn’t feel unyielding, unwavering, or unbroken.
Nara was relieved when she heard that the rest of the researchers had been spared—if it could be called that. They may have been rescued before the researcher’s time ran out. If the Adventists were genuine in their pursuit of cosmic peace, then wanton murder was counter to their creed.
Yet, their mercy soured her hate. She wanted them to be pure evil; a comical, twisted, intergalactic empire that espoused peace and harmony but represented everything but. It was shaping up to be more complex than that, which left Nara’s shapeless, unruly emotions without an easy outlet.
She could never work with them personally, yet she couldn’t help but consider: What if they offered their aid to Earth? What if Earth accepted? And what if her family wanted to stay there?
She was aware it was a pointless hypothetical.
“It’s not entirely pointless,” Chrome pressed telepathically. It was the effect of Soul Legion which allowed him to do so, subsumed or summoned.
“What do you mean?”
“You are concerned with the introduction of magic to Earth. I assume you think Earth is better off without it now. It’s a shallow judgment. You think your experiences are representative of the benefits of magic as a whole?”
She grumbled. “No. Doesn’t mean I have to be the one to do it. John can do it.”
“You’re the one with the ability to cross dimensions. He’s not going to be the one to do it. You’re feeling bitter with your misfortune and projecting it onto magic. Magic isn’t at fault.”
“I know that.”
“Consider this: Without magic, how does your world fight off its invaders? Do you think they can remain isolated for so long?”
“Can’t they? They have until now. What changes that? Earth’s been beaming love songs off into space with nary a love letter back.”
“Do you really think they are isolated?”
“What do you mean?”
“You think a Great Astral Being can torture a soul in a random body? Throughout all of the cosmos somehow, it’s attention landed on you? Their gaze is so far and wide it is impossible for them to isolate a single being without direction. They are fundamentally incapable of such miniscule thought.”
“Something’s already interfering with Earth,” Nara realized, voice laden with dread.
“Yes,” Chrome said, “And it is time to retaliate.”