"Wake up, we're at our new home. Mom's already inside making breakfast. She wants the rest of us to bring in the boxes and clean the house 'til she gets done cooking. You've got the easy jobs again, taking out the trash and serving the food. Lucky for you, there's no trash yet to take out." Aaroon had said.
"Don't you ever bug anyone else? I was in the middle of a dream." I said, getting out of the vehicle, feeling light-headed.
"Good morning!" Jaried yelled from the doorway, as he began laughing at my goofy hair.
"Shut up, loser." I smurked.
"Someone's in a grumpy mood this morning." Jaried smiled as he walked to the truck to grab a few boxes. I walked back to the house with him, helping him set down the boxes in the house.
I sit down on the couch still trying to wake up, I rub my eyes and yawn about a million times, watching as they finish up bringing the boxes in. Jaried organizes the boxes by person. I look over to the gay couple and the kids, all they have are what's in their backpacks. I feel sad and wonder if they feel envious of what we have. They keep to themselves and stay quiet, I wondered if they felt safe.
"Hey Liz, where do you want your stuff at?" Jaried asks.
"Oh, you don't have to bring the boxes all the way up to my undecided rooms, that's my job." I said.
"It's okay, I got it, just help your mom set up the table, she picked out all the rooms for everyone before hand. I think you are getting roomed with Sammi and Alexandria. But I could be mistaken."
“Are you serious?! I don’t want to be roomed with children... “ I sighed loudly, throwing my shoes off. “I’m to tired to even deal with them let alone have the same room as them. That's just great.”
“Relax Liz, I may be wrong. Go find out first from your mom.”
I didn't say another word as I walked away, I was already upset that I was woken up. Now I have to be with babies? I just hoped it wasn't true. I found the box with the dishes in them and took out some plates for us and set them on the counter. As I sat them down, my mom laughed, I looked over to see her smiling at me. I wanted to ask why she was laughing, but I didn't want it to become this endless struggle to get out of her.
However, her keeping our dad a secret was one secret I'm glad she kept. I think it was the right move for all of us involved. After all, whether due to him kidnapping, or abandoning us out of freewill, he still did it without another thought. It was selfish of him, and nobody deserves a father like that. And if he truly knew how much we loved him, how much Damien loved him, he should've done something about it.
"You have a keeper there Liz, I'm glad you found Jaried in your life." My mom smiles and said as she flipped the pancakes.
"What are you talking about? He is just a friend, I would never date him." I said.
"That's what they all say, but I know you will fall for him even in a world like this. Eventually you’ll fall for his charm. But that doesn’t mean I will allow you two to fool around. Regardless of where we are at, you are still to young for sex. We don’t need this world to go back to the 2010’s. Sex was everything to the youth. My mother was there in that time. That's why she has ten children from several different men. She was only twenty when she had her second child I might add."
"Ew, sex? There's no way that's happening for one, and for two, I'm not like you. You and grandma may of fell for every man you saw walking down the street, but I'm not like that."
"Watch your tongue. I see the way you react to him. I know you like him. Whether you want to believe so or not."
"What makes you think that? I mean, tomorrow we could die from those drugged up things and you are talking about love? What about you? You had nine children and five different fathers. I guess the sex craze still lingers all the way down to this generation."
"Because I’m in a good mood, I will dismiss your disrespectful responses for now. But why can't you think positively for once? Who made you grow up so fast? Relax, be a dumb teen and have a love life, fall for that great boy and stop being so afraid. This is once and a life time. Love doesn't come around as easily as you think. I'm telling you to go for it and you are being negative, what's your problem?"
"I don't want to mother. I don't want him, I don't want to focus on falling in love. Being with someone. I just want to focus on this and making it better. I know I can't do much, but love won't help. It's just a distraction I don't want. We are suppose to be making breakfast so can we please work on that?"
“Maybe I don’t want to work on breakfast, maybe I want you to go be with that boy. He is adorable, sweet, and great. Why don’t you like him?”
“Maybe I’m a lesbian mom, maybe I don’t want to be in love with anyone, maybe I’m asexual. Maybe I don’t want to have a relationship with my best friend. Maybe I just want to be single and have a friend, maybe I want to find out who I am first before worrying about a boy. Maybe I want to live in this world and not have to rely on someone or love him so much that when it comes down to it, I feel I have to save him from anything, even myself.” I slam my hand on the counter.
“I just wished you’d see how amazing he is Elizabeth.”
“But mom, I do see it. Okay, I just don't care.”
“Alright sweetheart.” She sighs loudly.
Mom stopped everything she was doing and looked at me straight in the eyes and put a hand on my shoulder, she knew I wasn't alright, but she didn't push me to say anything after that. Knowing me, I'd become a bitch and start yelling at everyone, after all, I do have my mother’s blood running through me. Jaried walked into the house and I gave an irritated 'oh great' kind of look to him and he gave a 'what did I do' confused look back, then he started making goofy faces that made me laugh.
Maybe mom was right, maybe I was falling for him. I didn’t want to of course, but love is unavoidable sometimes. But how could I fall for him? He is Jaried, my best friend, but he’s also the only one that makes everything seem okay in any situation. I certainly couldn't love him though, not like how everyone wants me to. That’s something I'd never allow myself to do. Least, not the love that makes you feel all weird and makes you feel scared all the time that the person you only want in this life will disappear. I don’t want to have those feelings where I feel like I have to dress up just to impress them or do things to continue our relationship. I just like normal. I like friendship.
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That person you wake up to every morning and your entire day just seems perfect. That kind of love my mom is talking about. Falling in love? It seemed like a foreign subject, a foreign topic. It just didn't seem right. Loving your parents, siblings, friends, yeah, I get that. That was normal. It was just an everyday thing. But giving your all, giving your heart 100% to somebody? I don't think I could do that. I don’t want to do that. I can’t...
Regardless, I don’t need to be thinking about relationships when I had chores around the house to do, my mom always made it very clear to get chores done and if you didn't... Well, you'd be lucky if you didn't get a beating or get loaded with chores on the weekends instead of watching movies and doing other fun activities. Though, Damien nor Jakecub had to do chores because Damien has a job and Jakecub never comes out of the room. It was never fair that everyone had to do something except those two. I had school, and school is hard enough. Especially high school. There’s a lot of work to be done, especially now that we have to do Calculus four in our sophomore year. I think the educational system is messed up, it has been for years.
“Liz, are you okay? Why are you just standing there?” Mom asks.
“What?” I ask, snapping into reality.
“What’s wrong sweetie?”
“Oh… Nothing, I’m good.”
"Can you go out to the garage and get some extra chairs for your dad, Jaried and some of these kids?"
"Sure." I looked around for a moment before walking out the door into the cold breeze.
"Thank you sweetie!" My mom yelled as I closed the door.
I heard a noise as I was walking out to the garage. I shrugged it off as maybe an animal that got spooked and I kept walking. My body shook and soon I realized my footsteps weren't the only ones I heard over by the house. I stopped in my tracks and looked around nervously. I looked for something sharp just in case. I didn't want to encounter one of those things and be empty handed. I surely didn't want to die.
The closest thing to me was a metal pole that my dad used to clean the gutters when we got here. I cautiously and slowly walked over to it and grabbed it. As soon as I got my hands around the pole and my eyes off of where I was looking, I seen the shadow of the thing. I looked up and saw it swaying back and forth. My heart felt like it was going to drop as it pounded against my chest. My breathes got faster. I picked the pole up and started walking towards it. I heard it growling with every slow step towards the monster that I took. I started panicking and I dropped the metal pole. I started running back to the house when that thing ran out and jumped on top of me. I started screaming and swinging my arms every which way, yelling for it to not bite me. It let go of me and I became confused. It laughed and then I knew it was a person. I started swinging my fists towards it in anger with tears running down my face uncontrollably. I kicked him in the balls and he yelled.
Everyone came out of the house yelling, I kept trying to hit the person and I got punched in the face. The next thing I know, I was on the floor and my dad was punching the person right after the other with my mom screaming for him to stop. Then gunshots go off and Jakecub starts screaming. My dad starts yelling at Jakecub to drop the gun and Jakecub yells at dad, pointing the gun at him. Everyone starts yelling and everything being said becomes inaudible until I yell that the person is trying to get away. My dad turns around and runs towards the guy until he can tackle him. The boy started laughing loudly. My dad forces him back to the house and he howls at the sky, laughing more.
"What in the hell were you thinking boy? Are you crazy?" Dad said as he threw the boy onto the porch.
"No, he’s just an asshole at best." Jakecub said in anger.
"Who the fuck would do something like this?" Mom said, holding a knife in her hand, looking as if she was going to kill the boy where he stood.
"It's just one of Jakecub’s idiotic friends who think it's funny to scare little girls." Damien said.
"Excuse me, but I’m not little!" I yelled.
"Um... You are 5 feet nothing dumb fuck face, you're short if you haven't noticed anytime soon and you're young." Damien stated.
"Excuse me idiot, but I'm 5'5 I'm average and I'm three year younger than you. That’s not a lot."
"Exactly my point, short, stupid, and young."
"Okay enough you two!" Dad yelled, "Get your butts inside all of you, except Jakecub, go get the chairs for everyone including this boy right here. He has some explaining to do."
I sighed as I walked back into the house, I ran to the bathroom and started crying. The reality hit hard, if it was one of those monsters, I could've died. I'm weak. I should have attacked first, and made sure it was a good one. Because if it was a monster, I would've been dead otherwise. I thought I was strong. I still have fragments of memories of when I was killing people while building the wall. I want to be that powerful again. What if I don't become that strong again? How could I protect anyone? I started to panic, my chest got heavy and my eyes blurred. I heard a knock on the door, it scared me.
"Hey, kid... It'll be alright, I promise. You'll learn. I know you're scared, but the important thing is you're not hurt." He said.
"W-what?" I responded.
"I know you're a fighter. I can see it in your eyes. You may be confused about who I am, about being gay, but I know you aren't confused about surviving. You know stuff, things that the others don't, and that's important. Surviving isn't all about being the strongest, or the quickest. My husband, you can take one look at him and know he isn't the fighting type. He doesn't have that capability. But he's smart. Damn is he smart, and that's needed too. You'll do okay. There's no need to worry, you're just learning."
"What are you talking about?"
"You'll understand eventually kid."
"Just explain to me please." I said, but got no answer. I tried a few more times to get a response, but nothing. So I whipped my tears and walked out of the bathroom. I saw the kid who scared me sitting in a chair, my dad right next to him, his hand gripping the boys thigh.
My dad saw that I was upset, he got up out of the chair and told the boy to not move an inch. When my dad got to me, he hugged me and told me everything would be alright. That I was apart of him, his blood, and that made me a fighter. A born fighter, and a leader. I don't know how he could see that in me, but somehow it made me feel better. Then he reassured me that as long as he was around, nothing bad was going to happen, and that he would teach me some skills if I wished. He patted me on the back and kissed me on the forehead before going back to his seat next to the boy.
"Thank you... Dad." I said, smiling.