Note: I think in need to drop the Fantasy Farmstead part of the title. The more I think about what is going to happen, the more it gets away from the small town slice-of-life grow stuff concept. I'm a bit torn on starting another Fantasy Farmstead and finishing this… I REALLY need to finish a book. This will not be short.

I followed slightly behind my new master, or new master's proxy I guess, as we made our way down the city streets. It was a mixed bag. On one hand I no longer had to sit with my old master's stuff, waiting to be auctioned off or wondering if someone would remember to feed me. On the other hand… I looked at the woman in front of me, or more specifically, I looked at her tail. Following the spaded end as it swayed. She was fucking weird.

She had horns and a tail just like me, but her color palette was brown and red instead of purple and black. She was entirely too tall, horribly grope-y, and was apparently able to buy anything she wanted without written permission from her master. Which was horseshit. She also seemed to take delight in telling me what to do, which didn't bold well for me and I was already tired from carrying shit.

I didn't remember her name, but the name of my new master was apparently Lord Harbinger. Which was another thing in the weird category. Harbinger was a title not a name. Like, the Harbinger of the King, or the Harbinger of Wrath, or the Harbinger of the End Times. As bad as following the Horned who was treated as though she was Hornless was, the sick feeling of still having to meet my actual new master was worming its way deeper into the pit of my stomach, making the ever present rock in my belly heavier. This was also a mixed bag. On the one hand I was apparently too fat and ugly to be sold to a brothel, which was great. On the other hand, no girl wants to be told she's fat and ugly, and there was no telling what my new master was like.

"Ah, there he is." The woman who's name I've forgotten purred.

We were being approached by three people. Two Anorians, as identified by their wide faces and creepy inside out eyelids, and another Horned. Oddly it looked like the Horned was in the lead. He had yellow eyes, gray skin, and curling horns so big it made my neck hurt just to look at them. Seriously, that was a lot of extra weight. My head would fall off. I guess that was why his neck was so damn thick. The woman didn't look so good. I'd consider her pretty average for an Anorian, but you had to get past the fact that she was missing her left arm and the left side of her face was horrifically scarred like she had been dropped into a forge. Her face was so shriveled that her eye was permanently closed and her hair was charred off. She also walked with a limp. My life seemed better knowing that I didn't look like that, or have to live like that.

That left the other guy who was most probably my new master. This was going to be weird. Most Anorian names sounded like baby talk so maybe that's why the woman who bought me called him Lord Harbinger. His skin was the dull brown color of someone that spent their entire life outside. His hair was a darker brown and cut short. He looked a bit scruffy and was less well dressed than the Horned. Speaking of which, the Horned was scowling at me. What the fuck did I do?"

"What's with the girl?" Asked the Horned.

The female Horned who's name I'd forgotten pushed me forward. "This is Neesha. I got her at an estate sale for coppers." She said with far too much satisfaction at my cheap price tag. She then reached around and grabbed my breasts again, squeezing painfully. "She needs to go on a diet, but should be completely fuckable once she loses some weight."

Oh great, I'm going to be some asshole's fucking toy. This day is getting worse.

"No." The Horned man said, his tone sounding very displeased.

Was the Horned man Lord Harbinger? Did that make sense? He had horns. His tail was short, but didn’t look much different than mine. Fortunately the woman released my breasts, but unfortunately she grabbed me by the horns and started rotating my head around.

"That's fine. She's a house slave. She can do all the cleaning and cooking."

"We don't have a house yet."

Wait, they don't have a house? Where am I supposed to sleep?

"She can still cook and I thought you were looking for a carpenter."

"Yes well… Can you stop that before she pukes."

The woman stopped rolling my head around. At least I think she did. The world around me was turning one way just to jump back to its original position and do it again. I think she was holding me up by the horns.

"Take her back."

"I can't. I got her at an estate sale. Got a lot of things there actually, she's practically free."

The Horned rubbed his temples and sighed. Then he motioned to the man next to him. "This is Saito Saigo, he's a carpenter. And this is Mai Fah Sung, she's a farmer. You know, people who are actually useful."

Oh, he just called me useless. Okay I don't like him. To be fair, he clearly doesn't like me either. He turned to the Anorians and started talking baby talk to them. The man, Saito, bowed his head and said a word. Actually it might have been the woman's name. "Ateraiah" or something. The female Anorian said and did nothing. Just standing there like an impression of a horrifying statue.

We were moving soon enough. Attaching the horses to the cart and leaving the city. That's where I found out I was expected to walk. I can't walk that far. I don't know how far we were going, but I was pretty sure I wasn't going to make it. I was already getting tired. Well, more tired than usual. Lord Harbinger reluctantly put me in the cart when he realized I wasn't able to keep up. Pretty sure he really hates me now and so for days I sat next to the severely injured Anorian girl as we bounced along the road. She said nothing to me, barely even acknowledging my existence, and only spoke in her Anorian baby talk to Lord Harbinger or the Horned girl when she needed to dismount and piss. I guess that was fair, she couldn't jump off the slow moving cart, do her business, and catch up like everyone else could. Even I could catch up and hop on so long as I didn't have to run far.

This text was taken from Royal Road. Help the author by reading the original version there.

***

"A shrine to what?" Alek asked.

"To whatever nature spirit inhabits this forest." Saito replied.

"Are you sure there is a spirit?"

The Anorian shrugged. "I can feel it, I think, but this is more of Mai Fah's thing. She's concerned about upsetting it. Says it prefers forested soil."

"Hmm, compost."

"Sorry, what was that Amo?"

"Nothing." Alek said, dismissing the thought. "Just something one of the townsfolk said. My garden bed is ready, yes?"

Saito nodded. "Yes Amo. Mai Fah says it's good for planting."

"How is she doing?"

The Anorian cocked his head as he considered. He shook his hand side to side. "Not great, but the work helps I think. She would like some writing materials. Wants to write her knowledge down as it would be easier to do than try to explain it all to you and hope you remember."

"That is not a bad idea." Alek turned. "Hey dog!"

***

I jumped at the sound of Lord Harbinger's harsh voice calling me out. I had been listening to the baby talk conversation while resting after hauling water.

"Yes master?" I said, hoping he needed something and didn't just want to yell at me for taking a break.

"Get the shovels and a tarp out of the covered wagon and put them in the cart. Then hook up the horse."

"Yes master."

I hated being called dog. I wasn't anyone's pet and I was fully aware it was in part a reference to the way my people breed. It was very dehumanizing, but I wasn't human, so I can't be sure it's as offensive as it feels. I know he explains things like I'm stupid, but that actually does help. His orders are very specific and I don't have to spend energy I already don't have on figuring out what he means. Raiah, the girl who's name I couldn't remember, likes to be vague and watch me suffer. I honestly prefer the master's orders over hers. He continued his conversation with Saito as I did as told, moving the asked for gear from the covered wagon to the cart and fetching the horse. I liked the horse. He was big and dumb and sweet.

I soon found myself sitting next to Lord Harbinger as he drove his cart through the woods and onto an actual road. I was familiar with the large expanse of farmland from the trip in. Most of the buildings stood on thick wooden stilts like the legs of some odd square or round shaped bug. Fences separated livestock from fields and pillars of stone marked boundaries. Most of the people working the farms were Horned, with only a few exceptions. After what seemed like miles of that, an actual town came into view. Large buildings crowded both banks of a river, stone watchtowers looming over their tiled roofs. We turned left on a main road after crossing a stone bridge.

"That's the wizard's tower." Lord Harbinger said, pointing at one of the large stone watchtowers. "And that's the general store. Commit that to memory in case I need to send you to retrieve anything."

The town bounced by, a mostly organized jumble of square wood and stone buildings with more to the west judging by the rooftops that peeked out above the structures along the street.

"That's the sheriff’s office, and that is the feed store. Up ahead is the smithy."

"Hey!" Yelled a Hornless woman with firey hair and a freckled face wearing a red dress as if she wasn't red enough.

"Speak of the devil." Alek muttered.

The woman snagged hold of the cart as it moved, planting herself on the cart's step. A near infectious grin stretched across her face.

"So how has the most eligible bachelor been doing? I haven't seen you around much."

Was she flirting with him? I couldn't see Lord Harbinger's face due to the angle, but I got the feeling from his tone of voice that he was not amused.

"This again?"

The woman grinned even wider than I thought possible. "Well, now that you're a Lord, I know quite a few women that have suddenly changed their opinions on some of your physical attributes. Harlots, the lot of them, but you have become a major topic of gossip."

Lord Harbinger kind of just harrumphed. The red woman leaned around him to look me up and down with her emerald eyes. "Hey, I like your horns."

She liked my horns? This woman was possibly crazy. I looked at Lord Harbinger as I had no idea if I was allowed to speak to other people, but he just watched the road. "Umm, thank you?"

The woman turned her attention back on her master. "Salves now? Kind of thought that was beneath you."

"Raiah's fault."

"Raiah? Think I saw her the other day. She's cute. Are you still single?"

This girl really was crazy. Lord Harbinger turned his gaze on her. I couldn't see his expression, but she made a pouty face.

"Wanted to ask you, what was that book you took?"

The red girl looked confused. "What book?"

"Nice try kid, the one I saw you take from the palace."

Holy hells. This girl stole a book from a palace? I upgraded my opinion of her from crazy to completely mad.

She shrugged. "Beginners guide to summoning demons."

Bat shit crazy. I imagined Lord Harbinger scowling at her by the way she pulled her head back and held out a hand I surrender.

"I'm not going to summon a demon."

"Swear it."

"I swear it thrice. Cross my heart, hope to die, stick a thorn through my eye. I'm breaking down some of the summoning aspects so I can understand more about summoning things I would want to call on."

"Have you considered the local wizard?"

"Uh yeah." She said in a tone that implied it was obvious. "But I don't have a license."

"Hmm. If I could solve that, would you promise to seek his guidance?"

The woman beamed. "Hells yes."

"Okay. I'll take care of that. Tell me about the forest spirit."

"Spirit."

I really wish I could see the looks he was giving her.

"Hells, seriously what makes you think there's a forest spirit?"

"An Anorian mentioned it. Your magic sits firmly in the realm of not arcane, and a comment you made about compost."

"Mmmm." Said the red woman before grinning. "Secret." She let go of the cart and began walking in the opposite direction even as we trundled down the road.

Lord Harbinger turned back to watch the street in front of us. A displeased look on his face. I said nothing.

We sat in silence as we left the town following the south road. After passing some more normal looking farms and a few orchards, my traitorous brain stumbled upon a horrifying thought. We were heading far south of town. There were shovels and a tarp in the back. The master didn't like me. Was he going to kill me? I fully admit to silently panicking as we headed further south. The last farm was a while behind us. Shit, was I going to die? He could sell me. Surely that would be a better option. He turned off the road and headed down a barely worn trail through the trees. Holy hells. Holy hells. Why did he point out the shops if he was just going to kill me? This made no sense.

We pulled up to a cleared area with a small building that, judging by the woven fence around it, may have been a chicken coop. The only other thing on the land that looked recent was a small garden, of which Lord Harbinger stopped the cart next to.

"Find some fallen branches the width of the cart. About ten of them." With that said, he jumped off. My racing heart settled a bit as he retrieved a shovel and walked over to the garden. Okay. I probably wasn't going to be murdered. Branches. Got it. I was so tired.

The branches got laid in the cart in a crisscross pattern. The tarp went on top and got pushed down through the lattice creating several little bowls. Apparently the master was moving his garden. He didn't seem pleased about it, but I was happy to not be digging a me-shaped hole. Lord Harbinger dug up three plants for every one of mine. I could see the annoyance written on his face, but he said nothing. The man really hated me.