The next few days were strange for CJ. He didn’t sleep well. Every night he had the same dream, the beeping intermingled with the sound of roaring flames. He woke up sweating and tense.

Once he was awake, he watched the rest of the world slide past him. He spent the first one in a cot all day. The Goldfeather Post let him use an open cot in a common room until he left. Without any possessions of his own, he was just one more man in a room of others travelers in beds. Most of the other people there seemed to be Skymen just passing through, a couple others that arrived with Mae, or people that paid for passage.

CJ stayed put, sitting in his cot as people talked, moved, lived. For food he snacked on rations he had on him during the battle.

It felt like he didn’t even think much. He didn’t know what to think, or what came next. There was just a bunch of nothing and background noise. Then thoughts would come all at once, thoughts about what he could have done better, what he should have been in past moments, what this whole adventure should have been.

No one disturbed him during those times while he sobbed into a pillow.

He heard enough of the talk around him to know that Lady Mae was making plans to leave. CJ didn’t know if she was going to go into hiding, or what, but he also didn’t know if it was any of his business anymore. This wasn’t how an adventure into another world was supposed to turn out. It felt like it would have been better if he just died.

By the third day his time face down on the cot was disturbed by a familiar voice.

“I heard you were in here.”

CJ snap turned to look, Larl was sitting on the next cot, watching him with a slight frown. CJ rolled over and sat up, his eyes wide as if he was seeing a dead man.

“Larl?” CJ asked.

Larl grinned. The man still looked pale. There was a noticeable chunk of his hair shaved away, and a large scar. There were bags under his eyes, and his facial hair was scraggly.

“You look terrible, CJ. Have you been sleeping?” He asked. He leaned with his head at an angle, like he was trying to see something on CJ’s face.

CJ leaned back. “Me? You look half dead. How are you up? Last I heard-“

“I hear you haven’t really been out of this room.” Larl interrupted, his smile fading. “I was up yesterday, but they didn’t want to let me move. Proper healing and rest does wonders for the body and soul.”

CJ opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out. His chest was burning, and it felt like if he said a word too many emotions would explode out all at once.

“Also,” Larl said, “some magic, maybe.”

That was too much. CJ started to laugh, and then kept laughing, until he felt tears welling up. But he kept laughing, and Larl just sat there and watched. Other people in the room cleared out after the show was clearly just one man being too pathetic to be entertaining. Eventually it all just became a quiet gasping. CJ wiped his face.

“I’ve heard some of what has been going on,” Larl said.

“Yeah,” CJ said. “We’re done. I guess I didn’t realize exactly how bad it all was. Kind of blew up in my face.”

“Our face,” Larl said. He sighed. “Lady Mae is leaving today, did you know that? I don’t know where she will go, she is trying to be quiet about her destination.”

CJ nodded. “I didn’t know she was out today, but people keep talking about it. She doesn’t have a lot of options left I guess. She ain’t the legit duchess if her dad is alive.”

Larl shook his head, “But he isn’t. He can’t be, CJ. The man has passed, we- she saw him die.”

This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road. If you spot it on Amazon, please report it.

CJ didn’t know how to feel about how determined Larl was about that. But it also didn’t really matter. They still lost.

He sat back, and let his head tilt up. “We don’t have an army, we have no allies. It doesn’t matter what she believes, that bastard Greywind beat us. I really messed up, Larl. Byr died for it too, I’m…”

CJ was going to apologize. At this point, to him, the whole loss was his fault. He forced them to be there defending Scaleback, he gave them the hope it would work. That drew Mae into it, and that kept Byr in the line of fire. Without him, maybe they could have hid, or fled. Without him, it could have gone differently.

“You deserve a second try,” Larl said.

CJ looked over. “Huh?”

Larl shrugged. “You were kind of forced into this, weren’t you? I know that people always want to believe their saviors will emerge onto the scene ready to change the world, but you were barely given a chance, CJ. You went from a march away from death, to a a few days to learn all you could about us. Then you bravely fought one of the most lopsided battles I’ve heard about.”

What did the details matter, did people get second chances in real wars?

“You lived though,” Larl said.

CJ shook his head. “Lived with nothing. Alyss and Mae hate me, and I have no allies left. What would a second try even look like?”

Larl stood up and came over to his cot. CJ instinctively scooted over, and the priest sat down beside him. “I’m not the kind of priest to drone on about faith saving you. I believe that hibe gave us the flame to fight on. If he didn’t, then we would snuff out. If you think you shouldn’t go on, then you need to reexamine the details. You didn’t live with nothing, you have allies here. Do they hate you, or are they just as hurt as you. As for allies… well, I might have something to say about that.”

CJ looked over. “What do you mean?”

Now Larl just chuckled. “See, one little chance at hope and you change your tune.”

“Larl…”

“Okay. But it isn’t simple. It has to do with my connection to Sir Byr. But to keep it short, I might know some people that we could go to. They might fight with us, if we can make it worth their while.”

CJ thought about this for a moment. Larl was a strange man. Not in any particular way, he didn’t seem nefarious. He just seemed like a man with history that he wasn’t ready to talk about. In particular, there was one place CJ always noted Larl’s expertise.

“You used to be a mercenary,” CJ said.

Larl hushed him with their strange ‘air chop’ hush motion. “You’ve picked up on that, have you? When I was a younger man, I didn’t go by Larl. I was Lethanial Karl, Leth for short. But at length, I had quite a few nicknames, like ‘the Horror of Darkhill’. I… that me was a different person CJ, a terrible man with no care for human life.”

Imagining Larl as someone to be feared was difficult for CJ.

“I forced my band to do more and more for coin. Eventually we were hired for a job that pushed us into Akahi territory. So many of my people didn’t want to go, they thought it was a terrible choice, blasphemous even. I didn’t care, what could hibe do that was not already done to me. Many split with me that day, including the best woman I knew. Those still with me went into Akahi, and we were destroyed by Byr. So many died or fled, except me… who he spared.”

CJ narrowed his eyes, “Spared you? Why?”

“Mercy. He said he saw something in me, and that I could make up for my crimes, become someone better. I believed him.”

He had the feeling that story was missing a lot of little details. But that wasn’t the important part.

“So this woman?” CJ said, “She is your bet?”

Larl nodded. “I’ve tried my hardest to keep track of her. I actually send her gifts through Goldfeather now and again, though anonymously. I believe there is a chance she would take us in.”

“For what?” CJ shrugged. “How many of these mercenaries could there be, it won’t really make a difference if we can’t beat that army of Greywind’s, will it?”

Larl simply sighed, and then shrugged. “It would give us a chance to start, wouldn’t it? What more can we ask for, CJ Eastman?”

He didn’t know if he agreed, but it felt good to know someone did believe that. Having someone that thought that maybe just maybe he could do right, it felt like a weight off of him. Besides, it was better than sitting in the same cot day after day on a mountaintop. He at least had to try one more time.

“Okay,” CJ said, nodding. “So we tell Lady Mae this, see if she won’t join with these mercenaries. I don’t know if we can take back her home but maybe we can do the next best thing.”

“What is that?” Larl asked, a grin on his face.

“I intend to kill that Greywind person. They ruined Akahi, killed Byr, and tried to kill us, that seems like some worthwhile revenge.” Cj said. He stood, and then looked over to Larl.

Larl nodded, “I guess so.”

CJ thought for a moment, “Actually, can the Goldfeather post send letters to anyone? What is the protocol there?”

Larl perked up at the chance to explain something to CJ. “Oh right, you wouldn’t know much about that would you? Well if they can find them, they will send to them. Unless they have specifically asked to not receive mail from you, the Goldfeather post will do their best to locate them and deliver. So even if you don’t know where someone is, it can be worth it to try to send them a letter. Why, who are you trying to contact?”

CJ took a breath in and out. “I might try to make a new friend.”

“Oh, well that’s nice. Though before we go do anything, you might want to go to the baths, CJ. Not to make a point of it but…”

CJ sniffed himself. He did smell like someone who was wallowing in bed for 3 days. “Oh… yeah you right.”