2 - 2. My Heart is Trembling.
The dim lights of the living space flicker before sparking fully to life, casting deep shadows across the room. Nyx is fiddling with the few cushions upon the couch as Jun gingerly pulls a seat back at the dining room table. She can hear the bedroom door click as Noel exits, carrying a small patterned blanket. As Noel scoots into a seat as well, Nyx licks her lips nervously, glancing to the side. Getting caught crying like that was embarrassing.
“Summoner,” Jun begins, his blue eyes flickering as he stares her down. “I - “ He flinches as Noel kicks him under the table, right in plain sight of Nyx. Correcting himself, Jun continues. “We both think you should sleep in the bedroom.” Nyx’s expression flattens as she shakes her head. Finding her seat at the table, she spins a pencil in her hand and grimaces for effect.
“Summoner,” Jun continues, until Nyx motions for him to stop and taps her pencil against the single sheet of paper on the table. Of the several words already scrawled down, she specifically taps ‘No’ several times. There are two of them and one of her, how can she hog the bed for herself? Absolutely not. Besides, the couch was a significant step up from a cave floor. Idly, she spins the sheet of paper around. Incidentally, the pen and paper had been inside the side table.
Yes. No. Maybe. Together. Explain. To communicate, she has these five words written down and boxed, along with her rudimentary gesturing. Her fingers gently rub against the right side of her head as she lets out a slow, drawn out sigh. She thought she wouldn’t need it, but now she’s regretting not writing down ‘sorry’ as well. Nyx bows her head slightly, grateful that neither of her companions start speaking until she’s done with her gestures. Noel never interrupted from the beginning and Jun adjusted quickly. Gesturing at both of them, then the bedroom, and then the word ‘Together’, she dips her head again. Noel covers her lips as she slips into giggling laughter, shaking her head.
“Please, Lady Nyx. You hardly need to apologize for something like that.”
“Forgive me, what…”
“She’s apologizing for rooming us together, Jun.” Nyx nods. Should she comment, ‘As expected of a succubus’ here?
“Ah. Yes, you hardly need worry. We are dungeon bosses, it would be natural for us to spend all our time inside the dungeon.”
“Right?” Noel, with her chin supported by one hand, points at Jun with a cheeky grin plastered over her face. “Lady Nyx, is there something on my face?” Nyx, caught staring, shakes her head rapidly and bites the inside of her cheek, pouting. It’s not as though she can explain that Noel’s normally elegant and cool expression making such a cute face threw her for a loop. Instead, she taps ‘Explain’ roughly.
“Ah, why a dungeon boss guards a dungeon? Of course, Summoner, allow me to explain.” Nyx is still curious as to how Jun speaks without moving his mouth, but she raises her hand. That isn’t what she wants to know.
“Oh, then perhaps from what a dungeon is? I suppose I could try my hand - “ Nyx shakes her head at Noel’s attempt as well. She carefully scratches her question into the paper, grateful that the three of them share a language.
[ How do you know? ]
“How do I know… Summoner, how do I know about dungeons?” Nyx nods her head, but she can see the way the blue flames in Jun’s eye sockets waver. Noel bites her lower lip and looks away. Nyx’s brow furrows further.
[ What were you doing before you were summoned by me? ]
“What was I…” Noel’s voice hesitates, low and scratchy. She pulls the blanket tighter around her shoulders, while Jun taps his finger restlessly against the table.
That’s what she was afraid of.
・
Nyx places a hot mug of water by Noel and returns to her seat. As the red-eyed demon breathes it in, she visibly relaxes and smooths over the traces of her exhaustion and worry.
“Lady Nyx, regarding my history. I do remember it somewhat, but…” Nyx reaches forward, gingerly. She stares for a moment as Noel slips out of her reach, leaving her hand hanging in the air. Dipping her head, she looks between her two companions and shakes her hand from side to side.
“You aren’t going to ask about it?” Nyx shakes her head.
“Summoner, despite your fear when I was first summoned?” Her cheeks burn slightly as she pouts. Noel is staring holes into her.
“...Lady Nyx, just like that?” She nods. Just like that.
Although Noel and Jun have only been around for a day, Nyx considers them her allies. They aren’t friends yet, more like roommates that she has inadvertently pulled into a housing contract. The guilt is crushing. Free will is not to be trifled with, she thought, but two contradictions are sitting at her dining table.
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She slides both her hands through her dark bangs and pulls her hair back, sighing. Her eyes open wide as Noel’s guilty, worried expression greets her. Nyx shakes her hands in front of herself, flustered, ruffling her own hair. With her agitation peeking through, she takes a slow breath and exhales. Let’s just treat them both as humans. They’re not, but I can’t ask what a succubus is.
[ One topic. ] Saving as much space and time as possible, she writes that down and gestures to each person at the table in turn. There are probably a thousand things to cover, so they can just take turns. Glancing between themselves, Jun finally raises his hand first.
“Then, I will begin. Our Summoner is self-conscious and fragile.” Nyx’s head slowly creaks towards Jun, a forced smile on her face. Are you picking a fight with me?
“Even I can guess that you are worried, Summoner - Have you stolen us from our original lives?” Nyx nods timidly, wringing her hands together. She spins the pencil in her hands back and forth as Noel cuts in.
“We are here, so we must be removed from our original place. Or, I wonder...”
“Copies. That would also be possible. Our memories have been tampered with as well.” Nyx’s fingers rest on her lips as she closes her eyes and considers. Which is it? Jun’s voice continues.
“It does not matter which it is. Summoner, this is what I wish to convey. I am alive.” Noel raises an eyebrow. “Enough for a skeleton. The ethical quandary has no impact. Whether it is wrong or right, whether I am a copy or myself, I am here. I am me. Forgive my presumption, but you both feel the same way, do you not?” Noel flashes one of her cute, relaxed grins and leans on her chin again.
“Right? You said it well, Jun.” Nyx nods as well. It certainly had been bothering her, but it was true she couldn’t do anything about it. She lets out a defeated sigh and nods. “So, dear Nyx, please don’t worry so much.” Noel’s voice grows soft and soothing for just a moment, pulling Nyx’s face into a strained smile. Noel isn’t smiling, however.
“But… Are you going to replace us?” Nyx’s heart nearly stops. Noel’s wavering voice has lost any hint of its usual light air or poise, wavering and almost resigned. Nyx jams her finger into the word ‘Explain’ so hard the paper crumples, matched only by her own crumpling expression of disbelief. She’s staring a hole into Noel; Nyx doesn’t miss the way Noel’s eyes flick to ‘No’ on the sheet of paper. Her gut wrenches. She doesn’t shift her hand.
“I will explain.” Jun cuts in, crossing his arms underneath the robe. “We have some understanding of our own situation. In short, we were summoned by you. Should your dungeon core be destroyed, you will die. It is likely we will also perish. I do not know how other dungeons are run, but I do have some understanding of basic strategies. It is highly efficient to replace the boss of your dungeon with a better or more specialized option.” Jun’s voice is level and calm as his skeletal head tilts forward and the lights in his eyes go out momentarily.
“Our memories and existences have been tampered with so that we can be dungeon bosses. It is somewhat similar to a familiar contract.” Nyx bites the inside of her cheek. “We have been forced to accept that we will be replaced.” Noel’s head tips forward in agreement, but she refuses to meet Nyx’s gaze. But you still asked. Before she answers, she scrawls out her own question.
[ Free will? ]
“I wonder how much we still have.” Free will is not to be trifled with. That’s what she said, so why? Why. Nyx bites her thumb as Noel’s voice settles into the empty room. “We are still ourselves. We… Dear Nyx, we are not forced to like you. However, we are still your summoned dungeon bosses. This is your dungeon.” Coercion and several other choice words float through Nyx’s thoughts as she grimaces. Her summons are like employees who cannot quit, no matter how awful their boss is. Work to live.
Nyx taps the same phrase again. She scribbles out a small box with ears, sharp teeth, and angry eyes, then draws a line from ‘free will’ to her generic monster. Jun’s blue flame eyes flicker to life as he stares at the drawing. Nyx swears she can see him shift deeper into his cloak.
“None. Hallway monsters have no will or personality. They are soulless puppets, mere shells.” Hallway monster was a new term, but she could guess the meaning. Any monster that wasn’t the dungeon boss was probably a hallway monster. Then, if she replaced her dungeon bosses with better ones, these two would… What would happen? Her mind whirls with the possibilities. Blood rushes in her ears as one hand covers her mouth tightly, tears pricking at her eyes. Stifling her panic, Nyx stumbles off her chair.
She could argue it was ‘their dungeon’ as much as she wanted, but talk was cheap. That’s why both her companions called this place her dungeon. She had been foolish, thinking their relationship could be more even just because she said so. Trembling, she stumbles in front of Noel. The woman in front of her shirks away from her touch again, so Nyx just sinks to the floor and shakes her head a thousand times. Looking between Jun and Noel, Nyx’s expression cramps helplessly.
I won’t. I won’t replace you. I won’t get rid of either of you. Please, please, please understand me. You’re all I have, I won’t, I can’t - One of her hands slides through her bangs as a crooked smile takes over her expression. Her right hand slides down over her eyes to hide her pinprick tears as her left hand clutches the hem of her tunic. She hears Jun ask her to get up, but her crooked grin only stretches further. Neither of them are helping her up anyway. Scared of her? Scared of her. Of course they are.
She’ll just have to prove it. She was already thinking about this anyway. Baring her teeth, Nyx sneers. Pulling herself back onto her feet, her hand slams against the table. Her hair is everywhere, her eyes are alight with fury, and her heart is full to the brim with defiance. Clutching her paper lifeline, she carves her next statement in. So they understand she isn’t just acting on her emotions, she won’t regret it, so that Jun and Noel can understand her.
[ I’ve been meaning to do this. ]
And to the system that taunts her, she has but two words. Fuck you.
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Dungeon Management
- | > Authority Transfer <
Are you sure? This cannot be reversed, dumbass.
- | > Yes <
- | No
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