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Empress of the World
The Curmudgeon

The Curmudgeon

"Invade your home?" Aurora did not understand what the angry fairy was saying.

"Yes, you are trying to walk into the entrance of my homestead. What business have you with me?" The fairy lowered his expressive, bushy eyebrows so that his eyes were almost completely hidden.

"No business with you exactly, sir," Zan answered, "but—"

"Humph! If you have no business with me, then you have bothered me quite enough. Now shoo!" The fairy held out his hands in a brushing motion to rid himself of the strangers. They turned to walk away from the curmudgeon when they realized that they had no idea where to go.

"I don't suppose you..." Aurora was shocked when the fairy grabbed her arm suddenly.

"Did you hear that?" the old fairy looked around warily.

The Empress stopped and listened. "What?"

The fairy relaxed. "I could have sworn I heard an unwanted guest about to ask me for a favor, but I must have been mistaken."

Aurora puffed her cheeks. "Listen, sir.."

"My name is Reyan. Have the decency to use someone's name if you plan to ask for a favor." The fairy pulled a stool from a portal and sat on it lazily. If the woman was going to take up his time, Reyan was going to make himself comfortable.

The woman graciously tilted her head in acknowledgement before trying again. "Hello, Reyan. My name is Aurora, and this is Gandr and Zan. we are in need of directions. We are searching for the fairy Bolemir. He and his wife Prem live somewhere around here, we believe." The woman's pleading gaze was met with another of the fairy's snorts.

"That old fool!" the fairy exclaimed. He ignored the fact that he looked eons older than his fellow Fairy. "It seems like Bolemir will let anyone into the fairy lands. Tell me, what would he want with a human, a gnome and a....what are you? A vampire?" Reyan asked while squinting at Zan.

"I am a Guardian," Zan replied, realizing that he had instinctively lifted his hood when the fairy appeared. He dropped it now, and his silver eyes gave Reyan a shock.

"I see," was all he replied for a moment. Reyan went completely still with his eyes closed. The trio began to wonder if he had fallen asleep. With Aurora's permission, Gandr leaned in to touch the elderly fairy's shoulder when Reyan's eyes popped open. "Don't touch me! I will portal you where you can never be found!"

Gandr held up his hands in surrender and backed away. "My apologies!"

Aurora stepped between the halfling and fairy. "We were just worried about you. You must be very tired and we have interrupted your day. We did not mean to cause you trouble."

"You want to go that way," Reyan said gruffly as he pointed. "Now head along before I put another portal in your way just to annoy you."

A smile touched Aurora's mouth. Something about his crusty exterior made the Empress feel a strange affection for him. "Thank you Reyan. We are indebted to you."

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She kissed the old hermit on the cheek like a dutiful granddaughter. Reyan's eyes opened wide. Aurora curtsied and flashed the most grateful smile on him to show her sincerity.

"Let us go," she told the other two. "We need to make it to Bolemir before nightfall if possible. I would hate to get caught out here for the creatures of the dark to find us,"' the Empress added with a hint of feminine worry.

Zan and Gandr dutifully turned to go, their walk becoming more determined.

Reyan touched his cheek and narrowed his gaze. "You sneaky woman!" He screamed at Aurora's back. "Trying to sneak your way into my good graces with the softest kiss I've ever felt!"

The Empress turned around with large innocent eyes and looked at him with confusion. The fairy clamped his mouth shut before more insults could spill out. He motioned for them to come back toward him.

"If you are going to twist my arm for help, you may as well come inside while I find Bolemir. But do not expect any food or drink! This is my house, not a tavern!" The old fairy furrowed his brow such that it was one long white caterpillar. Aurora struggled to hide her smile.

"Did we twist his arm?" Gandr asked as they walked back toward Reyan.

"Her Majesty did, in a way. She killed him with kindness." Zan smirked.

Aurora said nothing, pretending not to hear.

Reyan allowed the portal that protected his hovel to disappear. Behind it stood a large tree much like Bolemir's home, although it was smaller because only one fairy lived inside. The old fairy stood and took the stool in his hand. "Allow me," Zan offered to carry the piece of furniture.

"Get your paws off my stuff!" Reyan snipped. Then he relented. "I better not find a scratch on it from your manhandling!" He thrust the stool into Zan's hands.

The group followed Reyan into his home. The inside was disorganized but not dirty. Zan set down the stool and was immediately reprimanded.

"Not there! Were you raised in a barn? Over there, you fake-vampire." Reyan pointed to a spot on the dirt floor where the imprint from the stools legs was obvious.

Zan set down the stool. "So that is how you can portal things so easily! You know exactly where things are." Suddenly the mess of things did not seem so disorganized after all.

"You may be smarter than you look," Reyan responded with a half grin. It quickly faded as he remembered to scowl. "As for you, Missy!" the fairy shot an accusing finger at the Empress. "I have some bland cookies and some boring nectar that I can offer by way of refreshments. Don't you go complaining that they aren't good enough for you."

"I would never!" Aurora pretended to be offended. "Your hospitality is beyond compare. Thank you for your kindness."

Reyan shrunk to a pinprick of light and flew back and forth from the kitchen. Returning to full size, he set the tray of goodies on the low table near a couch. The hermit jerked his thumb and ordered them to sit.

"I will be back in a moment. Stay here and do not touch anything. I better not return to find you snooping," Reyan warned them sharply.

Aurora shook her head. "We would not dare. We will be right where you left us."

Reyan raised one eyebrow in challenge but said no more. He disappeared into a portal, leaving the three to munch on cookies.

"What a strange fairy!" Gandr observed. "He shoos us away and then invites us in. Then he says he will not feed us only to give us dessert and drinks…"

"And these cookies are absolutely divine!" Aurora added. "I will have to get this recipe for the palace chef."

"But what bothers me the most is…why didn't he just portal us to Bolemir's house? Why invite is inside at all?" The halfling wondered.

"That is odd, I agree." Zan stroked his chin. "You do not think this is some sort of trap, do you?" The two males exchanged a worried look before Aurora burst out laughing.

"You really do not see it, do you?" the Empress asked. "Reyan is lonely."

"I am not!" Reyan argued as he stepped back through a portal into the room. "I am just discerning about the company I keep. You should feel highly honored. It is clear that I am far too generous. I invited you here because you looked ragged, and I needed to get my daily exercise. But if you are going to be ungrateful…"

"Please, generous Reyan, tell us what you found," Aurora pleaded, trying to change the subject.

"Do not try to flatter me!" Reyan staggered back. "I am immune to your feminine wiles!"

The Empress sipped the nectar from her cup to hide her smile. Zan and Gandr were too stunned to speak. No one had ever accused their leader of using 'feminine wiles' to achieve her goals (except Devrim, of course). Usually Aurora's strength carried her through.

"I found Prem. Turns out you were too far east of where Bolemir is waiting," Reyan informed them.

The Empress shot the two males a frustrated glare, but they pretended not to notice.

"Prem has gone to fetch him and then they will open a portal here shortly. Gede wanted to come back with me but that rascal is far too wild. A little like myself in my glory days." It was hard to tell if the fairy was grumbling or bragging.

Aurora's heart leapt at the mention of her friend Gede's name. She had not seen him in a decade. "Then you must have been quite amazing in your youth," she praised him.

"I am amazing now!" Reyan protested. "Not that anyone appreciates me."

"I am sure that must be frustrating. They must not know how amazing your cookies are. You must give me the recipe!" Aurora crooned.

"That secret will die with me. Prem has been trying to discover my secret for years…" Reyan laid his finger aside his nose.

On cue, a portal that led into Bolemir's study appeared. "After you, Your Majesty," Zan said as he offered his hand to help her stand. Aurora accepted graciously.

"It has been a pleasure to meet you. I do hope you will join us," the Empress invited Reyan as she glided into Bolemir's home through the portal.

Reyan tried to remember the last time he had been invited anywhere and failed. He looked at the Guardian and halfling. "Either of you married to her?" he asked with a jerk of his thumb toward the portal.

Both males shook their head. Reyan shrugged.

"Shame. He's a lucky man."