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5.23

Shaden didn’t know which would fall off first—his ears or his fingers. He breathed in slowly, not wanting to freeze his lungs. This was the coldest he’d experienced yet.

He glanced at the men below him, who were digging their fingers into the stone. There was no equipment nor gloves. What would have been impossible for ordinary humans were being carried out by them, who had the assistance of mana. Still, he didn’t know how they were able to do it so tirelessly. Even he was having trouble constantly reinforcing his muscles that strained every ten meters of climbing. He worried if he was breaking his body without realizing it, but mana had done wonders so far.

These men had little of that. Not to his extent. But they ascended step by step, hold by hold, with packs on their backs. They had lightened their load as much as possible at the bottom, but Shaden was able to glimpse at why this world was so very different from his own. This was a world of magic and monsters, and the people were built to cope with it.

At least, if they trained. And the soldiers of Fort Avagal were trained.

It would have been much easier for him if he used his mana hands to hoist himself up, but he didn’t want to cheat his way through when the rest of his squadron was suffering. No magic, not even healing. He’d cope through intense circulation like the rest. Still, he wished he’d brought the ring with him at least to warm himself. He couldn’t feel his ears anymore—they were simply lumps of something that hung on the sides of his head. Only through his mana could he tell that they were intact. His hood did little to alleviate the frost.

Pillen pulled him up, and he sat to the side of the ledge, taking in slow, deep breaths. The others arrived one by one, and they too sat down, massaging their fingers. He looked down at the distance they’d traveled, and his head spun.

They weren’t even halfway up.

“Any injuries?” Pillen asked, looking over the squadron.

“None, sir,” Enov replied, and the others gave short nods.

“And you, Shaden? This must be a first for you.”

“It’s fine,” he muttered, rubbing his hands together.

“Good lad,” Enov said.

They all sat quietly on the ledge, looking at the clouds that floated by. The cold had dampened their spirits, as did the steep path ahead. Or that’s what Shaden believed until he noticed the men munching on the dry crackers they’d brought, swallowing them with handfuls of snow.

“You should eat too,” Geloi said, giving him a reassuring stare. “There are people who've lost their energy in the middle and have fallen off.”

“I don’t like moving on a full stomach,” Shaden replied, prompting a snort from Geloi. The man didn’t say more.

Somehow, Shaden felt as if he’d answered incorrectly.

“It’s good to eat,” Pillen said, likewise munching on crackers. “Everyone here has more experience than you.”

“Okay.”

Shaden took out his pouch of crackers and put one into his mouth. He noticed Patran and Hinz give him disapproving looks, muttering amongst themselves, and he tried his best to not pay attention to their words. They were right—he was unfamiliar with their customs. He didn’t know much, but judging by their reactions during the time he’d spent with them, it was ideal to follow a superior’s command without question, and he’d asked more than he’d followed.

He’d made mistakes in Nafar because he hadn’t known. He wanted to know more here, but there was disapproval if he asked. And there was disapproval if he didn’t know.

Inside, he knew the best course of action would be to shut up and obey. But he didn’t like that. He was here to learn. Strictly speaking, he hadn’t done anything that was outright rude. But they looked at him as they’d look at a subordinate, and he was pretty sure he wasn’t anyone’s subordinate in Fort Avagal, with the exception of the Nieuts as according to their contract. It rubbed him the wrong way that the soldiers would treat him as such. It only worsened the more time he spent with them, and Pillen didn’t seem to notice. Or didn’t care.

Perhaps it was his pride getting in the way. But given his position—

It was okay to have some pride, right?

“We continue.”

Upon Pillen’s command, they got up with their bags and continued their climb to the top.

The wind only grew worse as they ascended, blowing at random but frequent intervals, sometimes softly, sometimes with the strength of a great push. The edges of Shaden’s clothes flapped violently, and after repeatedly pulling his hood over his head, he gave up and let it stay down.

There was a reason why they’d been able to keep going without slipping off. Though subtle, there were places on the cliff that had been carved to serve as grips and footholds, like rock climbing. But they didn’t rely on ropes, as they would ‘be open to making careless mistakes’. A dangerous reason, Shaden thought, but it displayed how hardy these men were—though their hardiness wasn’t suited for him.

Shaden stopped when Pillen did. He looked up to find the man gesturing with his fingers.

A predator was nearby.

As he’d been taught, he relayed the signal to Dilli, who was below him. Then he became still, turning his head to the right. There was something nearby, and he hadn’t been able to spot it.

Then he saw it. At the corner of his eye, a speck glided by. He squinted to make it out better. It looked like the vague shape of a bird. He didn’t know why they were stopping because of a bird, but until Pillen gave the sign, all of them remained as still as statues.

The creature went beyond their vision deeper into the mountains, and only then did Pillen begin climbing again.

The sun was setting when they reached the top. A thousand meters? More? They were high enough to touch the clouds. When the rest of the squadron arrived with Enov being last, they stood in formation and began to walk again. It was surprisingly flat up there, though he could see higher summits all around them, some high enough to make his head dizzy. Shaden wondered where the road in the middle of nowhere would lead them.

He’d expected them to set camp for the night, but Pillen continued to walk tirelessly forward, jumping across boulders, creating footprints in the thin layer of frost. It wasn’t powdery enough to be called snow. He was glad that they’d taken the time to tie a thin plate of metal spikes to the soles of their boots.

The sun vanished, and they walked on under the stars. Through narrow paths, sometimes climbing, sometimes descending, they moved forward. There were no signs, no apparent paths. Yet, the squadron pushed forward in the darkness. Only the sound of footsteps and the dim moonlight helped them navigate.

It felt mystifying, marching through the cold night; he liked the strange feeling of adventure. Yet, surrounded by people he wasn’t close with, he would have preferred to enjoy the moment alone.

Shaden took a glimpse behind him. He couldn’t see their expressions in the dark, but none of their bodies sagged with fatigue. He could see why they’d spent a whole week simply doing exercises.

He sighed.

“Tired?” Pillen said softly without looking back.

“No,” Shaden replied in the same way. “Maybe mentally.”

“A little more, and we’ll arrive,” Pillen encouraged. Shaden smiled. Tonight’s sleep would be incredible.

It wasn’t a little more.

The sky was turning from purple to red to orange when they reached their destination—a stronghold buried deep within the mountains, surrounded by stone. It had been carved into the side of a larger mountain that went up beyond the clouds. Had Pillen not led them directly towards it, Shaden was sure he would have missed it amidst all of the other random paths.

There were other soldiers, two at least, on the lookout, though Shaden was too exhausted to find them all. He simply followed Pillen across the opening where they stopped before the stronghold.

“Wait here,” Pillen said, setting his bag down.

Ten minutes had passed when Pillen arrived and fetched his bag from the floor. He gestured to them to follow, and they headed inside in single file.

The stone structure was empty and narrow, with low ceilings that could be reached if a man jumped. Their footsteps echoed across the halls as they navigated through the maze-like place, ascending stairs and sometimes into the darkness. Only through sound was he able to follow where the sunlight didn’t reach. There were no torches in sight; the whole place felt abandoned. Though here and there, human presence could be felt. Stains on the floor, crumbs on a windowsill. Distant footsteps that did not belong to the squadron. Shaden had a feeling that if he shouted, everyone within the stronghold would be able to hear it.

They eventually reached a room where beds had been carved out from stone, eight in all. Light came in through holes on the ceiling, and there was a small hole at the back wall that likely led outside. The stronghold reminded Shaden of an ant’s nest.

“Get some rest, men,” Pillen told them, taking the bed closest to the door. “Shaden, take the bed across from mine.”

“It’ll be the quietest there,” Gel chuckled, setting his bag down.

“Enov, would you watch the emergency exit?”

“Righty-ho.”

The men automatically began to unpack, setting their blankets down on the stone beds. They fetched their spare clothes and began to head out one by one—they’d left everything behind, even stripping their coats off.

“The baths here are to die for,” Pillen told him, motioning him to come.

They walked downward, returning from where they came, but along the way, turned in another direction. Then they began heading up, and the halls that had dimmed began to be bathed in sunlight again.

They emerged where a long hole had been drilled into the mountain, letting the sunlight into the room that was big enough to fit twenty men. Nevertheless, it was very dim. Shaden couldn’t see the men’s faces properly, and only their silhouettes were visible.

At the center of the room, a spiraling staircase led down into the depths. Something like steam rose from it, and the smell of sulfur lingered in the air.

“Remember, no longer than thirty minutes. Thirty is the max,” Pillen warned the squad, putting his finger up. He chanted something, and a ball of light appeared on the tip of his finger.

“Afraid you’ll slip, sir?” Enov teased, taking his clothes off. The rest of the men were stripping as well.

“What about it, Shaden?” Pillen smiled. “It will be completely dark in there. Do you need this?”

Shaden glanced around the room. In the dim light, he could see the men’s eyes on him.

“No, sir,” he said, taking his clothes off. “I’ll be fine.”

“Alright.”

The light flickered off, and darkness returned once more. One by one, the soldiers began to descend the stairway, and Shaden followed after them. With each step, he could feel the air becoming thicker. A slimy smell—he’d experienced it somewhere. It was a hot spring that they were headed towards. The walls became slicker, and the floor became more slippery. He made sure not to accidentally trip and fall. It was good that the surface of the stone was rough to prevent slipping.

It was pitch black by the time his feet stepped into the water. But he could hear the men, splashing about and letting out sighs of satisfaction. Besides them, water was being gushed into the room, like a small waterfall.

“Find a seat, kid,” one of them said, his voice echoing on the walls and water. “It’s not deep here.”

He bumped into someone, who grunted in annoyance. Sensing the area with mana substituted for his sight, and he quickly found an empty space within the rectangular chamber. There was a hole at each end of the chamber—a higher one where the water came from, and a lower one where the water flowed out. The place seemed sanitary with no signs of life besides them, so he relaxed on the stone seat.

The heat soaked into his bones, and he felt giddy inside. After an endless amount of climbing and walking, it felt like he was in heaven, being in the hot spring. The grime and sweat and salt were being washed from his body, refreshing his skin.

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“I’m glad you enjoy it,” Pillen said, sitting down near him. Shaden wondered how he’d been able to see him until he realized that Pillen had the same sensing powers as him.

“It’s nice,” Shaden muttered, blowing bubbles into the water.

Perhaps it was because they were all exhausted, but no one spoke after that. Only the miniature waterfall could be heard, and he felt himself become sleepy with each second.

“We should go before we die,” Pillen eventually said as Shaden was about to nod off. “Shaden, go out now.”

Reluctantly, Shaden got up and made his way to the stairs, heading up. He felt relaxed and light-headed. He wondered why there was a time limit on staying at the springs. Because of the heat?

When the air turned cooler and lighter the closer he neared the top, he realized that it was because of the lack of ventilation. Had he fallen asleep with no one looking after him—

He shook his head.

Before everyone else came back up, he quickly dried his body with magic and put on his clothes. While the rest rid their bodies of moisture, he patiently waited, looking through the hole in the room that let the sunlight through. It was quite thick, taller than him. He wondered how it had been created in the first place.

When they were all ready, they headed back to the room, and everyone immediately fell on their beds. Shaden likewise pulled the thick blankets over himself. The bath had warmed his body, but temperatures were still freezing outside. Enov covered the emergency exit hole, and soon, the sound of snoring rumbled across the room.

Had Shaden been less tired, he would have been tortured by the experience, but his body was worn out. Closing his eyes, he felt his body sink into the ground.

The sweetest sleep came after the greatest exertion.

⤙ ◯ ⤚

“Wake up, wake up! Sleep any more, and you’ll freeze to death!”

Shaden blinked, feeling the throb of blood in his arms, back, sides, and legs. His muscles had not fully healed since he hadn’t healed himself. They weren’t hurting, but even with circulation, they’d been strained.

Someone groaned—it was Dilli, the lowest ranking person in the squadron. Hinz, the pale man, threw him a look, but Dilli didn’t seem to notice it. Geloi was already folding his blanket, while Gel rubbed his eyes, yawning widely. Patran silently stretched.

Pillen and Enov were already fully dressed, their dirty clothes in their hands.

“Since I allowed you to rest early, you will do the laundry now,” he said from the door. “Did everyone become slower? Is no one going to reply?”

“No, sir,” they all answered.

“Remember, we are still in the middle of training. Watch yourselves for indolence. It will get you killed.”

It sounded extreme to Shaden, and he wondered why the young man was being so strict from the morning. Or afternoon. But following the others, he quickly got dressed and stood at the side of his bed with his dirty clothes in hand. The only person who’d been faster than him was Geloi, with Hinz finishing right after and Dilli after him.

“Tonight will be the last night in the stronghold,” Pillen told them in a loud voice. “Afterwards, there will be no stronghold. Make sure you have prepared everything in advance, because starting tomorrow, it will be the wilderness surrounding us. You know the drill.”

“Yes, sir,” they all replied. They’d all done it before except Shaden. Then again, he’d had plenty of experience in the wild with Lytha.

After a few more remarks from Pillen, they headed to a room where buckets were laid out with clothes hanging on ropes to the side. After they filled their buckets with water (they could each use some magic), they washed their clothes and hung them to dry. The breeze was strong within the room, which was probably why it had been picked in the first place. But it was cold on his wet fingers.

“Shall we do some stretching?” Pillen said.

They warmed their bodies outside, though not too excessively as to cause sweating. They went to eat afterwards—they were given slabs of hard, dry food that looked like protein bars but tasted like jerky mixed with weird chewy bits in between. It was also very greasy once he began to chew on it.

After they ate, they went inside of an empty room where Pillen began to tell them about their plans and the paths they would take. Many geographical names were mentioned, but Shaden didn’t bother to memorize them. He was still tired, and after the long journey, didn’t feel like focusing. Though he didn’t dare to fall asleep.

“While this is training, take it as you would a real situation,” Pillen said. “If we encounter hostiles, keep formation and follow my orders. If you can’t hear me, remember what you’ve learned. Retreat and shoot. Shaden, since you are unaware of many things, stay by my side at all times.”

“Yes, sir,” Shaden answered.

“No one knows where we’ll go except us. If we become lost, no one will come for us. Always, always be cautious. Is that understood?”

They all replied with stern ‘ayes’, and Shaden realized that the sky was already turning from orange to blue. He didn’t remember much from the conversation. But he knew that there was nothing to worry about for him, since even if he did get lost, he had markers back here, on each of the members of the squad, and in Fort Avagal. He just hoped he wouldn’t get into an argument with the soldiers or be scolded for something he didn’t know.

After they left the room, they retrieved their clothes and went back into their room. The men immediately began packing again, and Shaden followed, leaving only the blankets out. Afterwards, they went to sleep—they’d wake up early.

The men seemed used to irregular sleep patterns, but Shaden’s eyes refused to fall, and an hour had passed after everyone had closed their eyes. Pillen and Enov were missing, probably preparing other things, but the rest were snoring loudly. It made it impossible for him to fall asleep.

Hiding himself, he ventured outside through the emergency exit hole. When he popped his head out, he was on a high platform carved into a slope that overlooked the mountains. It was too dark to make out, but one thing was sure—the hole was not for escaping. Judging by the boulders that served as walls, it was meant to be a defensive position. For shooting enemies.

His ears whistled with wind, and he thought about going back inside. But then his eyes met the sky, and he breathed out in wonder.

Never had the skies been so bright. The clouds had been blown away, and the full majesty of the night sky had revealed itself to him. He enjoyed the view. It was something he’d never be able to see as Demund.

He had the feeling that he wasn’t alone. Looking down at his body, he noticed that the shadow had wrapped around his hand. He put it up against the moonlight.

A dreadful chill went down his spine when he noticed that the shadow was in the shape of a hand clasping his. He willed it to vanish, and it did, retreating into his skin.

“What are you?” he asked. “Who are you?”

There was no reply. The presence had vanished completely. Shaden rubbed his hand, wondering what he’d allowed to live inside of him.

It wasn’t evil. It didn’t harm him. But why would it do such a thing?

He tried to will it to come back, but the shadow was now devoid from the mysterious presence. He scratched his cheek. Had he been too harsh to it? If it was sentient, he wanted to make friends with it.

“Well, whisper to me any time,” he muttered. There was no reply.

After enjoying the stars for a bit more, he returned to his bed.

⤙ ◯ ⤚

Shaden hated living outside. He’d enjoyed it at first. Hunting for prey, sneaking around in the snow. Camping during the night, shivering until he fell asleep. It hadn’t been horrible.

But every other night, he’d have to stay up while everyone slept with Pillen as guards. That much was okay.

But then sometimes they’d have to stay in one spot for hours, and Hinz would glare at him if he relaxed. That was a little less okay.

But then they’d walk some more, sometimes returning to previous positions for reasons. Whenever Pillen gave a twirling sign with his hand, they’d have to disperse immediately, hiding while falling on their stomachs, their blast rods aimed in all directions. The first time Shaden had made a mistake, he’d been chewed out by Enov. That was still bearable.

But then he’d been rebuked because he’d left for the toilet without reporting. It had just been a minute, and they’d been in the same place for a while. No one had noticed besides Pillen, and Shaden realized it was because the man had a marker on him. But did he really have to scold him in front of everyone?

They all seemed to know what to do. After all, they’d all been acquainted with each other for more than a year. He couldn’t help but feel out of place. And Pillen rarely explained things to him as he was busy with leading the squadron. The others did teach him, but there was always a lot of disdain involved when they did.

At least they gave him the best part of the meat they caught and subtly encouraged him with nods and pats on his shoulder or back. That was the reason why he hadn’t lashed out at them and quit. They still saw him as a child, and he suspected that their scolding was on a lower level of what they were used to. The thing was, he’d never been scolded harshly in his life, so their rough attitudes rubbed him the wrong way. And he hated it.

It made sense. Mistakes would lead to permanent injuries and even death. But being as powerful as he was, Shaden could only regard death as a fantasy. When they worried about injuring themselves, he couldn’t help but think it was meaningless because he had healing magic.

They didn’t know, nor did he care to tell them. He doubted that they would believe him. He also had a small desire to save them all in a dire situation, because that would definitely earn him respect.

These were all unreachable wishes, at least for now. They were only training, yet they took themselves seriously. Maybe it was his immaturity, but he couldn’t help feeling bored and annoyed. He was learning, no doubt. It was just that he’d rather have learned inside of a cozy building rather than out in the wild where the wind screamed icicles on his skin. Talking about skin, he felt nasty. Pillen didn’t allow them to wash, and the men seemed used to it. He’d been scolded for asking, being told to “Listen carefully the first time.”

If only they knew! But he had the feeling that even if Pillen knew of his capabilities, he’d still tell him to refrain from using it for the sake of training. And Shaden knew that he wouldn’t get anywhere by cheating his way through. He was already strong as Shaden.

For the waking world’s sake, he would put up with conflict. He’d gain skills he would be able to use without mana—skills he could use as Demund. Though he didn’t know if being able to spot hiding animals in the snow would be of any use as Demund.

It wasn’t just about the skills. It was also about mentality. Frankly, Shaden hated it. If this was how people grew, by being berated for the smallest things, he didn’t want to grow. Every day, he thought about going down the mountain. The men could be soldiers; he was just a visitor.

Yet every day, he remained. Did he remain out of stubbornness? Pride? He wasn’t sure. Maybe he didn’t want to lose.

The thoughts ran around and around in his head, and a week had passed before he’d realized.

⤙ ◯ ⤚

Step by step, they walked on.

How many mountains had they crossed so far? Five, maybe six. More if they counted the return trips. It was a tiring, repetitious process, and Shaden longed for the moment when he’d get back to Fort Avagal.

“Halt.”

Pillen raised a hand, and they looked around, raising their blast rods. Shaden was used to it now, but being attentive twenty-four seven was taking a toll on his mind. It wasn’t something circulating couldn’t solve, however.

“Strange,” Pillen muttered. He gestured with his arm, and they spread out, lowering their bodies. Shaden positioned himself to the right side of Pillen, looking northeast.

Pillen gave another signal, and they began to move forward with caution. All Shaden saw was rocks and boulders, with a bit of snow. Nothing unusual. There were animal tracks on the ground, but tracks like these weren't uncommon. A predator chasing its prey—that was all it was.

Shaden stopped in his tracks. Pillen had halted them. His eyes were closed now. Sensing the area, no doubt.

Shaden did the same. There wasn’t anything within a hundred-meter radius except a den of mice inside of the earth. Or were they moles? He couldn’t tell. The smaller ones felt so similar.

He snorted softly so that no one would be able to hear it. Pillen was being overly cautious. It wasn’t once that they’d run into situations like this. Five times a day was little, and the most they’d done was thirteen. He’d counted it in his boredom. Sometimes he found counting the birds flying ahead amusing, which wasn’t a good sign.

Yet, Pillen didn’t give the signal to get into line formation again. He signaled for them to move forward, and another gesture told them to be ready to disperse when needed. Well, they’d done this before as well. There were a lot of commands to learn, and they took their time to review them all.

Though he didn’t know why Pillen was acting so seriously. Out of petty spite, he formed a sphere of life detection around himself and enlarged it. A hundred meters—a hundred and fifty meters. He kept going, wondering why Pillen was doing such a thing. He’d tell the man later that his worries had been for naught—

Then he touched something—presences much larger than animals to their right, some ways behind them. He immediately focused on one. Its mana was being compressed. It was the same for the others around it.

In unison, the compression disappeared, and the intensity of their mana dropped. They remained in their positions, looking…their way?

That couldn’t be. They were over two hundred meters away. Maybe three hundred.

“DISPERSE!!” Pillen roared right as Shaden spotted dark streaks in the air falling towards them. He jumped to the side just as he heard the spear crash into the ground.

Shaden felt his face heat up. He’d let down his guard.

There was a shout behind him, and turning around, he saw that the floor had been splattered with blood. Patran was crawling away from the mess that was once his foot. The spear had cut in cleanly off, obliterating the bone.

The others had all dodged and had their weapons pointed towards the direction of the projectiles. Dilli was rushing to Patran.

Shaden had already raised his blast rod. He was regretting using magic he was more familiar with. The gift of focus always gave him too much needless information, but not using it now had been a terrible mistake—he’d failed to sense the projectiles. This was why Pillen had always told them to be alert, but he’d been lax.

He could redeem himself. He knew where the enemies were. The others had already begun shooting upon Pillen’s command. Grabbing a bullet from his pocket, he shoved it inside and prepared to shoot.

It had taken a lot of circulation, but he’d managed to lock onto the targets. There were eight in total, and they’d already left their spots. They were now running away from them, going deeper into the mountains.

Shaden frowned. Gone? Just like that?

Patran was on the floor, gritting his teeth while Dilli wrapped his leg with a cloth. Pillen gave the signal to halt, and they lowered their weapons, rushing to Patran.

“Quicky, healing magic,” Pillen instructed, and Gel chanted something, putting his hand close to Patran’s severed leg. But the magic was weak, and all it did was lessen the flow of blood.

“Fuck, they got us,” Pillen cursed. It was the first time Shaden had heard him curse.

“Who?” Shaden asked.

“The rest of you, stand guard. Shaden, No questions.”

They were far away from help—of course the situation was grave. Shaden considered doing as he was told, but he knew he couldn’t let things stand this way.

“Let me heal him,” he said.

Pillen’s face scrunched with anger and worry. “Listen—”

“I can do it.”

Shaden went to Patran, pulling the cloth on his leg off. It earned him an abrupt yank from Enov that sent him sprawling on the floor. Shaden couldn’t believe what had happened.

“This isn’t time for jokes!” Enov shouted. “If you think—”

Shaden got up and dusted himself. He thought about letting the man live as an amputee. But it wasn’t Patran’s fault. While Enov rambled on, he contemplated on his life.

He sighed, and lines popped out on Enov’s head.

“Orders, boy, orders! Is it so hard to understand?!” Enov yelled. “It’s because of people like you—”

Shaden ignored him and went to Patran again. Enov intercepted him, but he pushed him aside easily. The shocked look on Enov’s face was quite the sight, and Shaden prevented the man from approaching by wrapping the man with mana hands. Only then did Pillen seem to remember who Shaden was.

“Gel, step back,” Pillen instructed.

“Sir—”

“Step back.”

Shaden sighed again. They were so wary of him, and he didn’t like them as well. But he wasn’t going to let someone live as a cripple just because of that.

With a blast of green light, Patran’s leg returned. While the men processed what had happened, Shaden got up and kicked the floor.

“I’m going to go take a breather,” he told them. “I’m sick of this.”

With that, he vanished from their sight.