Lord Finlay of Dragonthrone and Brando Dragonthrone, Protector of the Realm, rode in on some of the largest horses the town had ever seen, wearing dwarven armor and throwing coins the way most farmers threw seeds. At first, no one knew why such eminent people had deigned to grace their town, but one person dreaded the truth. It was too obvious that Brando should arrive the day before the election with such a blatant scheme to buy votes. But it was too little, too late. He would need to buy more than a few rounds of drinks to beat Vice Secretary Tannor Rae for the title of Governor.

"Do you just want to throw money to the dirty children, or should I toss some to the clean ones as well?" Fin asked, tossing another handful of coins to a group of orphan-looking children. "I'll be happy either way; this is your show, after all."

"You're going to have to follow your heart on this one," Brando said, oblivious to the people following him. "Just try not to throw money at the ones I already threw money at. Unless they look like they really need it."

They had come to Brando's town to make his ex-wives regret leaving him because he was poor. The plan was simple, throw money at orphans, buy everyone a round of drinks, and let the gossip mill take care of the rest. Brando did not seem to care about wealth and would gladly toss everything away for the sweet feeling of revenge. Though having spent time in an orphanage, it felt nice to give something back for a change.

The first tavern they entered was called The Green Bog. It was only a little better than they expected from a place with such a name, but not by much. As Brando entered, everyone stopped and stared at them. Fin suspected they would treat them similarly if they weren't decked out in their fine armor.

"I have an important message from Lord Dragonthrone," Brando belted out to the crowd. "On this day, in the year of his majesty, 14, hence fourth… There will be no empty mugs because the next round of drinks is on me!"

The Green Bog lit up like an outhouse in a forest fire. Not a single face was without a smile, and Brando was at the center of it. He talked and laughed with everyone but did not stay too long. He had a mission, after all. So, he dropped a pile of coins on the bar, and it was off to the next pub.

"I kind of like the important message from Lord Dragonthrone part," Fin began, picking up on the spirit of things. "Can I make the next speech?"

Brando agreed, and at the next tavern they entered, he bought two rounds before addressing the crowd.

"I would like to buy everyone a round!" Fin announced, and when everyone finished cheering, he lifted his mug and toasted it to Brando. "To Brando, who single-handedly saved the life of a royal princess and got knighted as Protector of the Realm. I will also drink to the health of the poor, poor women living in this town who left him before he was rich!"

A resounding "Here, here!" erupted from the tavern.

They stayed longer than intended as people kept buying drinks for their story. Brando eventually pulled himself away and went outside. He then had to go back in to physically pull Fin away from a pair of grabby hands and batting eyelashes. Brando told him there would be time for that later, and they had a job to do.

After the fourth ale house, they started drawing a crowd. Many of their followers were from previous taverns trying to get the next free round. After the seventh, the tavern was too crowded, so Brando had the barrels of ale brought outside, where musicians played music, street vendors served food, and the streets were saturated with festivities.

Fin had an idea to host a race where the prizes for first, second, and third place were a gold, silver, and copper coin respectively. Brando loved the idea so much that he decided to host multiple competitions which is how the street tournaments began.

Brando found himself sitting on a massive throne in the center of a closed-off square, judging various games like the highest-jumping musician. First, the competitors had to play a song on any instrument. There were some grey areas about the quality of the song or instrument, but that was what Brando was there for. With a raised thumb, the competitors would then attempt to jump over an ever-rising rope.

"How am I doing on money?" Brando asked Fin, as he dolled out coins to the previous round's victors.

This story is posted elsewhere by the author. Help them out by reading the authentic version.

"You're about halfway there," He said after checking his inventory.

Brando handed his empty mug to whoever kept refilling it and stood to announce the next competition. Before he could, a throaty voice went to such lengths to begin a monologue that Brando was completely mesmerized and stayed quiet throughout the entire speech.

"Well, well, well, such a gallant man we have in our midst, or rather, a man having gone through great lengths to appear so," As the man approached, he was followed by others who were dressed in similar robes of office. "There he is, the so-called Protector of the Realm, throwing coins around in a dastardly attempt to buy votes. I don't know who he thinks he is, but I did some research and found out who he really is. Brando, the leatherworker, was orphaned as a child, penniless, and twice divorced. He is no Protector of the Realm, and he did not save any princess. He is a fraud and a disturbance of the peace and is unfit to govern this town."

Brando sat in his gaudy oversized chair, completely dumbfounded. He had no idea what he did to deserve such an insult that he thought it might be a joke. No matter how much he looked, he couldn't see any signs of it being one. The man's features were angry, not jovial. He had a slight lean as if the vein on his forehead weighed him forward. The climate, changing from loud to entirely silent, submerged him further into shock.

Fin was confused but came to his senses first. As he approached Brando, he held up a finger and asked for a moment.

"Brando, who is this guy?" He whispered.

"That's what I'm trying to figure out," Brando replied. "I swear, I've never seen him in my life."

"Ex-wife's husband?" Fin suggested.

"Maybe," Brando guessed. "If he is and he gets us arrested, it will ruin my whole plan. We can't have that happen."

"Do you want me to handle it, or do you want to handle it?" Fin asked.

"I'll handle it," Brando sighed. "If I look like I need help, feel free to jump in." He then cleared his throat and addressed the man so everyone could hear.

"I don't know who you are, but you seem to know a lot about me," Brando's voice did not waver as he stood and addressed the arrogant man. "I was born here. As a matter of fact, I was born just around the corner, on Ridger Street. I grew up a penniless orphan, and although I am not proud of my failed marriages, they have made me who I am today. I was given the title of Protector of the Realm after rescuing a princess."

Fin held up two pieces of paper that Brando pointed to. "I have the proof right there."

Tannor approached Brando, but he held out his hand to stop him. "I will show everyone except for you. That way, to call me a liar, you have to call everyone else here a liar, and they might not be as forgiving as I am."

"How dare you talk to me that way. Do you know who I am?" Tannor's face was red with anger. "Guards, arrest these men for their insolence!"

"If I am not mistaken, I am the ranking official here," Brando had no idea if this was true, but he believed in the power of the bluff. "Guards, arrest this man instead!"

"Arrest them! I am the king's nephew!" Tannor huffed.

"Arrest him! I am Lord Dragonthrone, and I am courting the royal princess!" Fin declared, feeling disgusted with himself for name-dropping Dezi. He took a drink of his mead to wash the mention of her out of his mouth. It didn't work.

The guards jerked in indecision and hesitated to arrest either of them. Finally, a man wearing robes similar to Tannor introduced himself as Chancellor Cargwen and voiced his concerns.

"This is highly irregular," he said in a soft but authoritative voice. "I propose we settle this matter in a less public forum."

"No, I want to settle this right now!" Tannor demanded. "For the sake of honor and my family name, someone read those falsified documents, so you can arrest them already!"

Chancellor Cargwen approached Fin and held out his hand. Fin handed them over, and he studied them. After a while, he called more of the robed figures to help scrutinize the documents under the public's watchful eye. They muttered quietly to each other, pointed at various details, and held the documents up to the light.

"It appears they are both who they say they are. However, neither Vice Secretary Tannor nor Sir Brando has the power to arrest the other at their own volition," Cargwen cleared his throat. "Lord Finlay, on the other hand, could have him arrested if he so desires..."

Fin declined.

Before Brando could resume the festivities, he saw someone that gave him pause. His ex-wife stood in the crowd with short brown hair, frozen blue eyes, and light freckles, and she had seen the whole thing. She had even seen him verified as Protector of the Realm! His mission was complete.

"You know what, Fin?" Brando asked as he tucked his coin bag away. "I think I'm done here."

"Do you want to plant some grapes in the dragon soil and make wine?" Fin asked, wondering how melon-sized grapes would taste.

Cargwen cleared his voice. "Excuse me, but I thought you would want to run for Governor. If you did, I would be more than happy to help you gain the position."

"Is it a lot of work?" Brando asked.

"Not too much," Cargwen considered. "A meeting or so a week and a few signatures here and there. Nothing too strenuous. All I would ask for in return is approval for one thing or another. Only small things, I'm sure."

In the dying light of the sun, Brando's eyes twinkled with the possibilities of governing his hometown. Fin was still thinking of growing grapes with Sprout's help. He wondered what he would call wine grown by a nature sprite from dragon soil? Maybe he would call it Dragon Berry Wine.

THE END