Entropia was on its way to the next stop on the campaign trail: Larry’s World, in Larry’s Province. Dirk occasionally wondered about the intellectual capacity of the people who named things in the IFSBG, but never voiced his concerns. If he had, he would have discovered that elementary school competitions were not uncommon. Of course, this was not the case with Larry’s World.
Larry Mountanto had been a dull-witted but egotistical explorer of the IFSBG’s early days. Indeed, his only positive trait had been his dauntless, almost foolhardy courage, which had led him to venture into areas of space left alone by wiser heroes than he. In one such place, he found a truly inhospitable world, which appealed to his warped sense of adventurism, and it was there that he made his home. Larry was emphatic about the naming of the place, and as no intelligent people inhabited the desert planet, aside from his own followers, Larry’s World it was. The next logical step was Larry’s Province, which was accomplished by cynics with a sense of humor a few generations later.
One might reasonably wonder how a province with such inauspicious beginnings became a major stop on the campaign trail. As is so often the case, the answer lay partly in blind luck, partly in slick, somewhat shady dealings.
Larry Mountanto had a son who was vastly the intellectual superior of both his parents. He was also possessed of a dismal lack of moral scruples, and soon after his father’s death, he decided that a bleak, desert world was not a suitable place for someone of his abilities to spend his life. Improving upon the strategies of his personal hero—Erik the Red of ancient Earth—Larry II launched a widespread media blitz, advertising Larry’s World as a virtual paradise. Maybe it was predictable that he found a people gullible enough to believe his outrageous stories. In fact, he found two.
The Herzeloydes were a race of green-furred giants from a world of perpetual snow, ice, and freezing oceans. Life was short and harsh on their world, and the beautiful landscapes, sandy beaches, and friendly natives depicted in Larry’s promotional holograms convinced them in short order. They quickly worked out a large scale real estate deal with Larry, which amounted to swapping all rights to the two planets, and any resources on them. Not one of the Herzeloydes stayed behind, even though it meant leaving their lucrative whale herding industry, which was Larry’s target in the transaction.
Larry’s other victims were small, thin, and blue skinned, with smallish blue horns protruding from almost every joint, and two larger horns from the forehead. They looked like comic devils a religious cartoonist might have drawn, and their tempers were almost as bad as the Herzeloydes’. The Belacanes inhabited a planet covered with jungles and swamps. It was oppressively hot and humid; they, too, were eager to trade. In this instance, it was their highly profitable reptile leather business Larry was after, and the Belacanes left it to him without a backward glance.
Naturally, neither the Herzeloydes nor the Belacanes were aware of Larry’s double dealing, and so they all received a twofold shock upon arrival at Larry’s World. It was bad enough that the new homeland was not all that had been promised, but the presence of rival claimants made things unbearable. All that prevented an immediate outbreak of violence was the thought of apprehending their deceivers, and forcing restoration of the previous status quo. Unfortunately, when they arrived at the one small community on the planet, they found buildings, some machinery, and utilities such as a waterworks. They even found gardens and livestock. But no people were anywhere to be seen. Larry Gahmuret Mountanto and his followers had departed.
The Belacanes and Herzeloydes returned to their ships, and began the long voyages home. But back on their home worlds, both the Belacanes and Herzeloydes received the nastiest surprise of all: Acme Space Guys was at both worlds, in force. Larry had sold all rights to the planets to Acme for a sizable amount of money, even by Acme’s standards, plus a world which answered most of the descriptions in Larry’s holograms—a world which Larry had been shrewd enough to inspect thoroughly before signing any agreements. Though he did accept the cash in advance.
Due to the nature of the deal offered by Mr Mountanto, the people at Acme had had suspicions concerning the circumstances under which the planets Bela and Herzel had been obtained. These suspicions served Acme well. Anticipating a certain obduracy from the previous owners, Acme Space Guys had strong police forces in place, in time for the joyous homecomings. This scotched the idea of taking the planets back through main force. Acme also refused to divulge Larry’s whereabouts, claiming that such an indiscretion would violate the spirit of their contract with Mr Mountanto, making others reluctant to do business with them.
In desperation, Larry’s victims sought relief in the courts, but in vain. Acme Space Guys owned the courts, as they did throughout most of the IFSBG’s history, and all the legal efforts of the Herzeloydes and Belacanes came to nothing. Acme was run by humans. Larry and his followers were human. But the plaintiffs were not. Therefore, even though they were patriarchal, the plaintiffs simply were not entitled to the same rights and considerations as the respondents. Besides, as the new joint owners of Larry’s World, the plaintiffs could not claim that they had no place to go. One of the senior justices reviewing the case went on record saying, “Forget the legality—look at the beauty of it!”
Left with no alternative, the two peoples set up residence on Larry’s World. They still didn’t like each other, and their collective attitude toward humans in general, and Acme Space Guys and Larry Mountanto especially, did not bear examination. But they were determined to make the best of a bad situation. And it was bad, even with the extra resources Acme had reluctantly given them at the order of a mildly sympathetic court.
The hot, arid climate of Larry’s World presented serious problems for both races. The heavily furred Herzeloydes wilted under the merciless sun. The Belacanes suffered severe respiratory problems. Water was dramatically scarce. Realizing that cooperation was as necessary as it was distasteful, the people began constructing immense, self-contained cities, complete with climate controls, medical facilities, and as many other necessities as they could manage. They survived only because they were already accustomed to harsh conditions.
But they did survive, to the chagrin of Acme Space Guys. They discovered that Larry’s World, unpleasant as it was, possessed rich mineral resources. They mined enough to meet their own needs at first, but they soon began to export. There was enough mineral wealth to satisfy the dreams of avarice. In time, Larry’s World grew more profitable than the planets Herzel and Bela combined. Acme Space Guys became eager to do the moral thing, offering to return the two planets to their rightful owners in exchange for that worthless ball of dust. But the new proprietors of Larry’s World were having none of it. Surprisingly, this time the courts did not back Acme. This has puzzled historians and legal scholars to this day. Some propose that the previous wrangling had required the courts to make a very definite decision in the matter, and once the decision is so firmly made, it is pointless to try to persuade a court of law to reverse itself. The principle of stare decisis has to be upheld, or no one will respect the law. Others suggest that Larry’s World made some back room deals, and bribed more effectively than Acme. No evidence of such bribery has ever surfaced, however. And the subject has been investigated at length. We may never know what really occurred.
Established as the legitimate owners of Larry’s World, the unlikely partners spread throughout the territory, cynically calling it Larry’s Province. They found many worlds with equally abundant wealth. Larry’s World became the hub of the largest mining conglomerate on the books, and it was all controlled by the Herzeloydes and Belacanes. This caused Acme Space Guys no end of consternation. They had their fingers in most other pies around the IFSBG, but they were unable to make any inroads into Larry’s Province, which was jealously guarded against any human involvement. Larry’s Citizens, as they sometimes called themselves, even managed to get seats in the Federation Senate, making Larry’s Province the first in the IFSBG to achieve nonhuman representation in that august body. Yet, in spite of all their successes, Larry’s Citizens never did acquire a great deal of affection for each other, or for the humans who had unwittingly made them so affluent.
Dirk sat back, tired by all the study Kori and Mara had assigned him. Mara had assured him that it was infantile to attempt serving a people whose history you did not know, and he had to admit that it was a fascinating subject. But he had always been an indifferent student of history and politics at best. He looked at the volume of reading he was still expected to do, and decided to have lunch with Ray or Oliver instead.
He found them by Entropia’s main swimming pool, where his suggestion of lunch met with approval. Dirk was glad to have the opportunity to speak with them, because a few things were puzzling him. More and more often, Dirk found himself going to them with questions. Kori’s answers tended to be too cerebral for his understanding, and Mara often responded with nothing but a withering glare.
“There’s something I don’t understand,” Dirk began, swallowing a bite of crab something-or-other with difficulty. He had been spoiled by the wealthy men of Erstwhile, and Acme’s fare was just not making it anymore.
“What’s on your mind?” Ray asked.
“It’s Kori and Ms Sakh. Everyone says I won big on Erstwhile, but they’re acting like I’m behind. Like I need to play catch-up. I’d like to relax a little before we get to Larry’s World, but they’re after me to work harder than before. And study history, like I’m back in school. I really don’t get it.”
Oliver and Ray studied Dirk for a moment. They liked Dirk, and found his ingenuousness refreshing. But sometimes they wondered if Dirk wasn’t putting them on just a bit.
“Dirk,” Oliver said, “you won about forty percent of the vote at Erstwhile. That hasn’t been done in a long time, and the Orion primary is the single richest prize on the campaign trail. There were close to a hundred well-backed Candidates on Erstwhile, and you walked away with a guaranteed spot in the Election Song and Dance, not to mention the support of the Vintners’ Association, which will be invaluable as the election progresses.
“But it’s just a beginning, no matter how good. You’ve earned four out of every ten Electoral votes Orion has to offer. That’s about 35 votes for you; they still have to get the exact number, and half Electoral votes don’t count. It’s a spectacular result, and it’s given your campaign a great start, but it will be wasted effort if you let up now.”
Dirk said nothing, a puzzled frown on his face. Ray took up the thread of the explanation.
“Look, you’re still a virtual unknown, son. You have only 35 Electoral votes committed to you. There are 538 overall. Now do you see? Even though you’ve won a place in the Song and Dance, you’ll lapse into insignificance if you don’t keep building your momentum.”
“If that’s true, why does everyone think a single victory is so important?”
“Aside from the fact that it guarantees you a spot in the Song and Dance, it’s assumed the winner will continue to build, boy. The sooner you chalk up that first big win, the sooner you can start.”
“Want to know when the election is really won?” Oliver asked. “During the week before the Song and Dance, after all the primaries are over. All the Candidates who have earned a spot in the Song and Dance will be on Earth, and so will all the delegates from the provinces. And all the votes committed to Candidates who didn’t make it will be available. That’s when the wealth of your backers will really make a difference. Until then, all a Candidate needs to do is stay relatively close to the leader.”
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“Oliver and I each got about ten or twelve votes on Erstwhile,” Ray added. “And we ain’t even reached our home provinces yet. You’ve gotta build up a lead, son, or we’re gonna wipe you out. I won’t deny that I like you, but I am tryin’ to win, after all.”
Dirk thought hard about what his friends had just said. “Thanks for explaining it,” he said. “Now it’s all starting to make sense.”
“Don’t mention it,” Oliver said, his manner light and jovial once more. “I like to think someone would do the same for me.”
On his way out, Dirk ran into Skip Voyager. “Dirk, old salt. Congratulations on Orion! I’ve been watching all the news shows I could find, and they’re touting you as the guy to knock-out Acme.”
“Thanks. I hope I can live up to their expectations, but Oliver doesn’t seem too worried.”
“He wouldn’t. Listen, we’ll be stopping at Tintagel tomorrow, to refuel. Ever hear of it?”
“Isn’t that the gas giant they made over into a resort world?”
“That’s the one. Want to try air sailing?”
“Uh...okay, I guess so. What time do you want to get started?”
“I’ll meet you after breakfast. See you then.”
Skip entered the lounge, and seated himself at the same table as Ray and Oliver. They left abruptly. Dirk went back to his rooms to read more about Larry’s World, and to think about air sailing on Tintagel.
Tintagel was perhaps the single grandest technological achievement of the IFSBG. Dr Roi Mark, a chemical engineer of amazing ingenuity, had come to Tintagel in frustration. All his life, people had constrained him to put a reign on his wild imagination. This trip was no different. Instead of being allowed to work on meaningful, exciting projects, he was merely assigned to study the composition of several gas giants in the area, to determine the profit potential of proposed mining operations. His superiors at Acme Space Guys actually had great faith in his abilities, and had given him a great deal of trust. But he saw the assignment as pedestrian and dull. Some of the gas giants had possibilities, and some did not. But with Tintagel, Mark was at once disappointed and intrigued.
The disappointment stemmed from the fact that Tintagel did not possess any valuable compounds; indeed, someone with a less inventive mind would find it worthy of little note. But Mark was creative, knowledgeable, and bored. He toyed with possibilities wherever he found them.
And what possibilities! They provided the intrigue. Mark realized that the elements and compounds of Tintagel required only subtle shifts to change from noxious gases to those that would support human life. Here was a task worthy of his genius. Mark reported his findings with an enthusiasm he’d never felt before.
Predictably, Mark’s superiors at Acme were not excited about Tintagel. Mark’s reports concerning the valuable components of other worlds in the region were a source of great optimism, but the response to Mark’s Tintagel findings was tepid.
This time, however, Mark did not accept a denial. Planets deemed valueless by Acme could be purchased for next to nothing, so Dr Mark bought Tintagel. He had a modest inheritance—presumably for his retirement—which he used to secure a large loan at the First Federated Bank of Larry’s World. Tintagel was close to Larry’s Province, and any plan Acme did not like was of interest to Larry’s Citizens. After a serious look at Mark’s proposal, the local engineers concluded that it was indeed feasible.
All that remained was the transformation of the planet. Mark and his backers determined that while Larry’s Province had all the resources necessary, Acme Space Guys could still do it more economically. So Acme’s employee became its customer. Even though most of Acme’s engineers did not predict success, the company was willing to provide virtually any legitimate service for the right price. Huge freighters came to Tintagel, carrying materials from Larry’s Province that Dr Mark believed would make him a wealthy man. Under his direction, Acme dutifully injected the contents of their freighters into the giant ball of gas, and then withdrew to witness the results.
It was a stunning success. Within a few days, Tintagel’s radius more than tripled, drastically reducing its density. Tintagel became a uniform blue, as nitrogen, oxygen, and water vapor replaced the poisonous gases. Later, clouds began to form. Wind currents carried the clouds in intricate patterns, and rain was occasionally produced. Tintagel had become a world of sky, with an extremely dense core at the center, the gravity holding the atmosphere in place.
Once the transformation was complete, Acme immediately saw potential for profit. Acme Space Guys wanted to build a large number of anti-grav hotels at Tintagel—hotels designed to pamper wealthy customers outrageously. The marketing specialists on the scene were already planning an ad campaign when Mark and his backers informed Acme that they were all for it—for the right price. A settlement was eventually negotiated, and Acme wasted no time implementing its plans. Within a few months, ten hotels were operating, with several more under construction. Over the years, Acme and some real estate companies from Larry’s Province made splendid profits. The First Federated Bank of Larry’s World received payment of the loan with substantial interest, and large bonuses from a grateful Dr Mark. Roi Mark and his descendants lived like kings from the royalties. It was a shining example of what could happen when Acme was of a mind to cooperate with others—and those others had the foresight to ally themselves with powerful backers, familiar with Acme’s usual tactics.
Air sailing was an activity unique to Tintagel, and Dirk wasn’t quite sure what it was. He got little time to wonder about it; most of the evening was spent packing. Refueling occasioned considerable tedium for passengers, and was not without its dangers. Most people opted for a stay at the nearest hotel, usually a cramped, overpriced disaster in orbit above the gas giant providing the fuel. But near Tintagel, passengers rode complementary limousines to the modern, comfortable, and expensive hotels on the world of endless sky.
Dirk helped Mara and Kori pack what he considered to be a lot of luggage. Then they went to the departure bays, and Dirk got a chance to see some of the other entourages. Most of them required two limos or more, and Dirk had thought about sharing a ride with someone. As the current frontrunner, Dirk got the first limo available.
“Get some sleep aboard the limousine,” Kori advised. “It will be nearing dawn at the hotel when we arrive.”
Dirk obediently stretched out on a couch, but was soon aroused by a liveried messenger. “Call for the Honored Candidate,” he announced.
Surprised, Dirk looked to Kori. She shrugged her shoulders. Dirk followed the brisk, polite young man to a private cubicle. A small monitor displayed Oliver’s face.
“Oh, hi there,” Oliver said.
“Hi there.”
“I was wondering if you’d like to go on a meteorological tour with some of us tomorrow.”
“Can’t. I’ve already agreed to go air sailing with Skip.”
“Skip Voyager?”
“That’s right. Maybe you’d like to come?”
“I’m already committed to the tour. But thanks. I’ll see you later in the evening.”
“Sure. Good night.”
“Good night.”
Dirk walked back to the lounge area, puzzled at his friend’s attitude. Oliver never said anything, but it was clear that he was not eager to associate with Skip. Dirk couldn’t figure out why. They were both personable, intelligent, and well-connected. Both seemed to be universally liked, and had good chances to win the election. A friendship between them—possibly even an alliance—seemed natural. But Oliver would have nothing to do with Skip. Dirk hated to think that he might simply be snubbing a rival, and it didn’t seem likely; after all, he was affable with himself and Ray. Of course, the disturbing idea came to him that maybe Oliver did not consider them a threat. It was with uneasy thoughts that he returned to his couch in the lounge, where he dreamed of beautiful Betelgeusean women who served him hand and foot, spoiling him as though they were his harem girls. It wasn’t the first such dream he’d had, and now it disturbed him only a little.
Dirk awoke to a soft shaking of his shoulder. He saw Kori standing over him in the darkness. She was no longer dressed in gossamer silks, and Dirk was vaguely disappointed.
“Time to get up, Honored Candidate.” There was only a trace of irony in her voice, and a slight smile on her lips.
Bleary-eyed and disoriented, Dirk stumbled from the limousine, completely unaware of his surroundings. Kori led him to a dark bedroom, where he immediately entered a dreamless sleep.
The next time Dirk awoke, he felt wonderfully refreshed. The early morning light poured in through the bedroom window. Dirk arose, and looked out upon a magnificent vista of blue sky and rose colored clouds. He quietly dressed and left the suite, deciding to breakfast at one of the hotel’s terrace restaurants. The open air seemed to make everything taste better, and as Dirk ate, the sun rose higher, changing the clouds from roses to peaches to cream. Tintagel was the only place in the IFSBG where a person could stand on a level with clouds, and still be comfortable in his shirtsleeves. Dirk felt lucky indeed, to be here right now. Whatever happened in the coming months, he knew he would always be indebted to Kori and Mara for the experiences they were giving him.
Skip joined Dirk a little later, and Oliver nodded to Dirk, but did not stop to talk.
“Why do you suppose he’s acting like that?” Skip asked.
Dirk shrugged. “I don’t know.”
“Well, I do. You’re starting to scare him.”
“What?”
“You heard me—he’s scared, because if you and I were to form a coalition, he wouldn’t be a shoe-in for victory anymore.”
“He wouldn’t?”
“No, he wouldn’t. You see, together we could control a larger bloc of votes than he can by himself. To survive, he’d have to find another powerful Candidate who’s willing to subordinate his own interests to Oliver. And that’s not very likely. Want to do it?”
“Do what, exactly?”
Skip looked slightly annoyed by Dirk’s slowness. “Form a coalition,” he replied. “You’re still a long way from being able to challenge Oliver alone, but together, we could have him on the run.”
“There can only be one Chairman at a time. Who would it be?”
“We don’t have to make that decision right away. Let’s wait until later, and see who has more voter support.” Skip stood, offering his hand. “Is it a deal?”
Dirk paused, thinking. He was a little scared by Skip’s directness. “I’ll have to talk to my sponsors before agreeing to something like this,” he said at length.
“Your loyalty is charming, but don’t forget that you’re the one running for office. It’s your butt on the line for everything you do, and the decisions have to be yours, not theirs.” Skip offered his hand again, the cloudscape behind him adding to his charisma. “Now, what do you decide?”
Again, Dirk hesitated. He didn’t want to say no to his friend, but it felt wrong to agree just yet. “I’m sorry, Skip, but I really think we should wait on this. You said yourself that some decisions shouldn’t be made this early.”
Skip thought a moment, then smiled. “You know, you’re probably right. It’s best to go slow in the beginning, especially for someone like you. I keep forgetting you don’t have a lot of experience in this kind of thing. But keep it in mind; it may be our best chance. I half suspect that Oliver and Ray are negotiating a similar agreement.”
Dirk thought about that. “That would just about kill any individual’s chances, wouldn’t it?”
“It would be devastating. You ready to go sailing?”