Leonel sat within the Lab Setting of the Segmented Cube, his mind absent. His only company was Little Tolly, but seemingly having seen through its master's mood, the little guy was a lot less joyful.
It was quite an odd situation to be in. The war for Earth was likely coming to a close even as he sat here, the nightmare that had haunted Aina had been killed by his own hands, and a bounty that should have been hanging over his head was effectively neutered for the time being.
Yet, Leonel couldn't find it within himself to be happy in the slightest. In fact, he felt a nagging insecurity eating away at his heart, refusing to let go and filling his chest with a heavy darkness.
Uncertainty.
It was dangerous enough for a normal human to allow such an emotion to rule them. To fear the unknown and one's future path more than the idea of not taking a step at all was as good as allowing one's life to come to a grinding halt. Property belongs to Nôvel(D)r/ama.Org.
In a normal world, the worst that could happen would be living out a life of mediocrity. One would become a normal man, wallowing through life with a woe is me attitude that wouldn't fade even with age.
Such a person would be a perpetual victim for the rest of their lives, blaming their failures on the actions of others and never undergoing any sort of introspection about what personal decisions might have led to their current situation.
However, in a world like this, in a new world order where killing and death was just the product of another normal day, such apathy was the root of more than just failure.
Left alone with his own thoughts, Leonel spun his own counter arguments in his minds over and over again. At one point, his numerous thoughts split into two streams, attacking one another from opposite sides as though determined to completely destroy the other side.
The more Leonel thought, the more he realized just how flawed his previous thoughts were.
His father was restricted the same way the hidden families were restricted? Was that really true?
The hidden families were in a completely separate space while his own father could appear on Earth itself. Were they really restricted by the same rules? Was that possible?
How convenient was it for him to rely on a set of rules he wasn't even aware of to absolve his father of any guilt? It was laughable at best. At worst, he was a terrible kind of hypocrite, the kind of bastard that would shame one for killing then turn a blind eye when a 'friend' committed the same atrocity.
And what about his treasure?
Even if he didn't give it to Monet, what was stopping him from giving it to someone else? If he had handed it over to Hutch, an old man he somewhat trusted, what kind of result would there have been?
If Hutch had the dictionary, how much easier would his battle against the three Heads have been? Would he have been struck down to the point he was in a coma? And if his battle against them was easier, wouldn't that mean that he would be able to end it earlier and save more lives?
According to what he saw from Raynred's memories, it was precisely because Hutch had been occupied that he became bold enough to travel into the depths of the army and eventually kill Roaring Black Lion and the others.
If he had been less selfish, would they have died?
The most complicated of Leonel's thoughts revolved around Pisces, this girl he hated with all his heart.
But, if he broke it down to the foundation of why it was he disliked her so much, wasn't it purely because he couldn't stand the fact she survived while those he called friend could only be buried?
What was Pisces' worst crime?
If Leonel was being objective about it, the worst thing she had done was point Raynred toward Royal Blue Province. This action could have led to a catastrophic outcome had Leonel not dealt with the Puppet Master.
Yet, even then, Raynred hadn't been targeting Royal Blue Province at all when he ran away from Elorin, the Province just happened to be the closest piece of land. Regardless of whether he found out this information from Pisces, he would have found out eventually anyway. Just like he had asked for Leonel from those of the Slayer Legion, asking the same question to those of Royal Blue Fort would have had the same impact.
However, if Leonel was the most honest with himself, what infuriated him the most about what she did was the most benign action: she had tried to get his treasures taken away.
If he broke down that action, sure, it was rooted in a certain selfishness on her part. But, wasn't his rejection of Monet's request also rooted in selfishness?
He had no obligation to hand over his things, this much was true. But… If he accepted this premise, what right did he have to dislike his grandfather's actions?
Of course, to Leonel, this was about more than just the fact the treasures had value. Tied to these treasures was also the fact his father had entrusted him with them, they could be considered to be the last bit of his parents that he had with him.
If he took it one step further, these treasures represented his chance at reuniting with his family, it represented a path toward the strength he would need to save Aina.
These all sounded like noble matters. But…
What was more demanding? For him to hand over a treasure that would allow him to accomplish his own selfish goal? Or for 'the strong' to risk their lives to protect 'the weak'?
If he felt that it was wrong for the Slayer Legion to take away the last piece of his father that he had and cut off his path toward saving Aina, then how could he also not feel it to be wrong for him to expect others to lay their lives on the line for strangers?
These thoughts ultimately led to the final nail in Leonel's coffin.
The reasoning he had clung to was that his obligations weren't the same as his grandfather's. One of them was a newly minted Prince while the other was The Emperor of a world. How could they be equated?
Leonel had no obligation to be selfless, but wasn't this the role of a ruler?
However, the words of his Uncle rang in his mind again and again.
No Invalid hordes… Not even a single sighting…
If an Invalid horde interfered in the war, Earth would have been finished. When comparing the talented versus the untalented, which would the Invalids prefer to target? The people of Earth would end up being attacked from two fronts, completely unable to counter. Even Leonel wouldn't be able to do anything to change this.
What right did he have to question Emperor Fawkes?