Tyler

Why is it that anytime something interesting happens, I lose consciousness? I mean, every fucking time something happens, first it was being tortured, and now this. I open my eyes, and everything is blurry. Before I know it, I am being held by my mother. She is taller than I remember.

The old nurse and her assistant step out of the room. Watching their blobs move gives me deja vu. And then it hits me. I was just reborn again. Why was I reborn?

Did I die? My mana was tearing me apart, and I thought dying would be more peaceful.

My mother and father hold me between them and smile. I cringe. Later tonight, they will be at it like rabbits.

So did some god turn back time? Or was the first life a vision and that I should use mana earlier? So many questions.

My eyelids start to droop down. I forgot how much I hated this baby body. I am tired after being awake for less than an hour. I can work on using mana tonight. For now, I will sleep.

********************

I feel a tugging sensation in my brain before pain assaults my mind. My mana core doubles in size as I silently scream. Tears run down my face as snot fills my mouth. That is not my favorite way to wake up.

Spitting the snot out, I roll onto my butt. I close my eyes and enter a meditative state before looking at my mana pool. Where there was once a tiny pond of mana, now a larger one takes its place. Just less than doubled.

The rampaging energies have stopped, and the surface is still. That might be why I died when I used my mana last time; the forces were too chaotic.

I cross my tiny fingers before letting the mana flow through my miniature channels. Watching the mana flow through every inch of my body, it finally reaches my brain. Right after it does, my eyes go clear, and my hearing enhances.

Loud moaning and the wet smacking of flesh on flesh fills my ears. I cup my hands over my ears and put my head down. That was not what I wanted to hear. I tone down the amount of mana going to my ears, and the noise gradually gets quieter.

I sigh in relief. That will traumatize me. Ok, now focus. I never got to the next part of the book. Stupid me not reading everything first. There was probably a section over rampaging mana.

Well, nothing I can do about that now. I wonder how I can get my mana out of my body. Does it just happen, or does it just go through my skin into the air?

Only one way to find out, and that is to test it. I focus on my mana and speed it up, but it feels like pushing against a brick wall. So that is not the way to use mana. Next, I try to guide it.

The mana flows through where I tell it, and as I guide it, the speed increases. As it flows faster, my body begins to feel lighter, and my senses extend. Time seems to slow down as I perceive the world at a different level. Slight glowing runes line the walls and floor.

So with this, I can see magic. That is very useful. After a few seconds, my mana runs out, and I flop to the bed with a massive headache. Why does channeling mana take so much effort? It could be because I have no practice and this body is young.

I rub my eyes and look inward again. The mana stops sinking into my body, but it doesn't stop moving through the channels. I can't even see a drop of mana missing from my pool. I want to know if I used mana or if my mana is different. Because what that mad mage did to me when I got mana has to have some effect.

With my eyes closed, I let my senses unleash from the minor enhancement. My parents have stopped fucking, so I can listen to other things.

In the woods next to our house, I hear everything happening. I hear the hooting of an owl and the cracking of branches as a predator tails its prey.

I embrace the sounds and lose focus as I listen. The world sounds so peaceful, and yet it is a terrible place. I am interrupted when the floorboards outside my room creak. Trying to be silent, I roll over and stare at the door.

As the knob squeaks open, my mother enters the room with a smile on her face. She closes the door while not making a sound before sitting in the chair next to my bed. She just stares at me, and I stare back.

So she doesn't have dark vision like I do. That is odd. Where did I get the ability then?

I see a chance to study mana and let it slowly enter my eyes. My mother glows brightly for a moment before I focus on her channels. Her mana flows at a rapid pace before going back into her mana pool. Her mana channels are giant compared to mine, but her mana pool is only twice mine.

So the mage gave me a larger mana pool. Well, along with what happened when I died before. Does that mean if I die, that the amount of mana I gain on my mana pool comes back to me? If so, I can just train it as a child and reset myself a few times to have a monstrous mana pool.

But could I kill myself just for more mana? No, even I haven't reached that point of insanity. Well, at least not yet.

After staring at my mother's mana for a while, I get enough energy back to change my channels. Instead of having it flow with two main channels, I make it into a relay loop that makes the transportation much more efficient. Then, I shape the channels at my pool to connect twice the amount. It takes me a few hours to do, and by the time I am done, my mother is sleeping.

Nothing changes for a few seconds until a massive wave of fatigue rolls over me. I barely lay down before my brain shuts off.

********************

"Waaaaaaaaaaaaa!"

My body cries as I wake up. I open my eyes and find everything is insanely detailed. My hearing picks up on the sound of thunder coming from the hall and metal grating against itself as the door opens.

This story has been stolen from Royal Road. If you read it on Amazon, please report it

I quickly stop the mana going to my ears, and the sound returns to normal. My mother opens the door and holds me to her breast. While I still dislike the way I get food, after a few years, I got over it and did what she wanted.

Sucking on her nipple, I process what happened after I redid my channels. My senses got a significant upgrade, and I have to dull everything but my eyesight.

I finish eating, and my mother lays me back down.

"Honey, is the baby ok?" My father yells from the other room. I unleash my hearing to find that he is putting his armor on. Before I get overwhelmed, I restrain the mana.

My mother smiles at me, and I can see the happiness in her eyes when she looks at me. "He is fine. I have a letter I need you to take when you go to work." She yells back.

Their interactions always amused me. They never fought or got mad at one another. And when something went wrong, they would work on it together. I hope I can find someone like that. Could I even have a relationship with my reincarnation power? I could fall in love and die, then only I have feelings, and they don't know me. Ok, no relationships.

My mood drops. I may not be the most sociable person, and I am not entirely sane, but I still want to find someone who loves me. Is that not what everyone wants?

I sigh, and my mother sees that. "Are you ok?" She asks me before picking me up. She holds me close and starts to gently sway, "Don't worry, Ty. One day you will grow up big and strong." She kisses my nose before setting me back down. "I love you, my heart and soul."

She leaves the room. I feel something deep in my heart stir and give rise to an emotion I had forgotten about, acceptance. Don't worry, mom, I will be more powerful than you can imagine, and nobody will hurt you.

********************

It took three years before I was back at my physical peak with this body. Not that my physical peak is much, but this time it is one year earlier. I don't know if I am entirely human anymore, though. After about six months, I was able to see into the shadows. The depths of which are terrifying.

Each chance I got, I would use my mana to strengthen myself. My mana channels are almost as large as my mother's, and my mana pool is one and a half times the size of hers. It turns out that mana channels are not in this dimension, along with the mana pool.

Tonight is the night that I look at that damned book again. Nothing should go wrong, hopefully.

The setup is the same, listen for when my parents go to sleep, sneak into the study and use the stool to get the book. Why change it if it worked before.

Twenty minutes later, I am sitting on the stool with the book on my lap. I quickly skim through to the point where I died.

To first use mana, connect to your mana pool centered in your chest. Next, let the mana flow through your body. (Note: This may be painful due to mana entering your channels for the first time.) Next, have the mana circulate until a loop forms, and it takes no input to move the mana. This is the first step to using spells.

I sigh. I figured that out already, stupid fucking book not being helpful, "Why can't you be a little more useful?" I whisper to the book before I continue to skim.

"Here we are, please, have what I want." I clasp my hand together before reading.

Spellcasting

A mage's most potent form of attack is using spells. It is also the most ambitious field of research. Since the first spell was used, mages have constantly gotten more powerful spells to use. However, it doesn't matter if a mage doesn't know how to cast a spell. To cast spells. The caster must first channel mana into the environment. First, the caster will take the mana from within them and let it flow through their skin and into the surrounding environment.

I set the book down before trying to push mana out of myself. Other than my mana rushing through faster, nothing happens. Slapping myself, I relax and watch as the mana slowly starts to leave my body.

"What are you doing?" Someone says from behind me. I kick the stool backward while channeling my mana to the max.

The amount of force used on the stool is too much, and it shatters while flying backward. The pieces of wood hit a translucent violet barrier before falling to the floor. I can't see who it is, but my mother's mana is red, so it isn't her.

I dive into my brain and look for what I can use mana on to get more power. Tracing the mana channels, I find one spot where the mana avoids. Right in the very center of my brain is a small black orb, flickering in and out of existence.

The assailant reaches a hand out to me, and in desperation, I touch the orb. Everything but me freezes. It isn't long, but all sounds and movement stop except for me. The world is in a gray tint, with the different colors of mana flashing like neon signs. I look at the assailant and past the purple barrier is a red individual with a small on her face. After one second, the world starts up again, and I stop channeling my mana.

My mother drops the barrier before summoning a fireball above her hand. She stares at me, her eyes confused and excited. "Are you my son?" She asks me.

"Yes," I respond, there is no point in hiding that I am not an average child. "Can you get rid of the fireball? It is hurting my eyes." I ask while shielding my eyes.

After using my mana at the max, my eyes are incredibly delicate even when it is over. And that I was in the dark before doesn't help.

She looks at me in confusion before dispersing the fireball. She mutters something, and her eyes glow. "Come with me, now." She says, and I quickly follow her retreating figure.

We go into the family room before she points at the couch. "Sit and don't move." She orders me before going to her room.

I channel some mana to hear her.

"Dak, wake the fuck up. Something important has happened." She says. I then hear a groan followed by a slap. "I said get up. Tye did something."

Apparently, that is all she needed to say. The sound of covers being thrown off and heavy feet hitting the floor tell me he is up. "What happened?" His deep voice rings in my ears.

My mother sighs before sitting on the bed; the wooden frame creaks as she puts more weight on it. "And why are there no lights on? I can't see shit." He says before a light comes on under their door.

"I will explain in a minute. Once you get dressed, we can go out there." She says before she slaps him again.

I hear him pulling on pants. Their door is swung open, and both of them step out. "Oh, channel some mana to see in the dark." My mother orders before putting out the fireball.

Canceling my own channeling, I wait a few seconds for them to round the corner.

My mother sits down on the couch opposite me and crosses her legs together. Father, seeing her not fawning over me, sits down and stares at me.

After a few minutes of silence, my mother speaks, "Would you like to explain?" She asks me.

I raise an eyebrow at her. It probably looks stupid with a babyface, but it gets the point across as she starts talking.

She turns towards my father, and she puts her hands in his. He adopts a worried look, and I see him shiver in fear. "I woke up a few minutes ago to a spike in mana in our study. So, I cast a concealment spell and went to investigate. What I found was our son reading my book on magic and getting ready to cast a spell."

My father turns away from her and looks at me. "That is not to mention that his mana pool and channels are larger than mine." She adds. After that, his expression turns serious.

He stands, and a sword of ice appears in his hand. "What did you do with my son, demon?" He raises the weapon to my throat.

I don't look at the sword but how he holds himself. His stance is good, but I see a few weak points that would lead to injuries after enough time. He wields his sword like a professional, but his left shoulder is slightly back, indicating an injury. My years of HEMA and sword fighting finally have an actual use.

With my current body, I wouldn't be able to win if it was a straight fight. But I don't believe in fair fights. And my father is a knight in a fantasy world; honor probably matters to him. I scanned his spell as he cast it and saw the way the mana was used.

First, it drew in water molecules in the air before dropping the temperature while holding the water in a specific shape. If I had to guess, the spell using wind, water, and ice magic. All of which have a basis in science.

Wait, if all spells work like that, I don't even need to learn them. I can just manipulate the elements and use science to get the desired effect.

I flick my wrist and use my own version of the spell to make a small dagger in my hand. With the dagger, I push his blade away before canceling my spell.

He tries to thrust his sword towards me, but a purple barrier gets in the way.

My mother's hand grabs onto his arm, and he turns towards her. "Stop. I don't care what is going on in your mind, but it is wrong. I already did a detect evil spell on him, and he isn't a demon."

She never said I wasn't evil, though. I wonder if that is because of my hate for that mad mage. Or maybe because of my unstable mind.

"Then what is he? Because I don't know of any child who is only three years old that can cast magic. And who can use ice magic like that at his age? And did you see his eyes? It felt like he found every flaw I have." He eyes me warily while speaking to his wife.

She nods and smiles at me. "I know, that quick use of mana. And he didn't even use a spell, just raw mana. I didn't know my baby could do that."

I can't tell if she is happy for me or mad that I didn't tell her.

My father dispels his sword and sits back down, "Will you tell us your story?"

I sigh before sitting down, "I am reincarnated from another planet, but I was reincarnated to you before and died, and it restarted." I say as bluntly as possible.

They both stare at me for a moment. My mother opens her mouth before closing it.

After sitting in silence for a few minutes, I know this won't work. "Can I have a minute to myself?" I ask them. My mother nods and leads my father out of the room.

When the door closes, I summon a large ice blade. "You can do this. It's just pressing the reset button. It will be instant." I say while trying to find the courage to kill myself. This version is not what I want. I should probably wait a few years before letting anyone know about my magical abilities.

With one last look around, I launch the ice blade at my neck. As if comes towards me, the door is slammed open, and I see my mother's horrified face. It is the last thing I see this wipe.