Jack had a lot of options. He had three seconds to consider everything before he

pushed the button. He had half power on his watch. Josie was out of the way so he

couldn’t hurt her with whatever he did until she became solid again. The Enterprise

was shooting at random soldiers to keep them clear of the battlefield.

Matilda and the notes agreed he was dealing with a type of mushroom. Mushrooms

were half-plant. His options narrowed down to Man-Thing, Plantman, or Doctor

Druid. None of them quite fit what he wanted, but maybe he could do a lot more with

Druid.

He pushed the button and wore the robes and hooded cloak of his persona. He

reached out with his third eye and felt everything around him. He wasn’t as far

reaching as Majik, but his narrower focus pointed him to a solution to the problem

ahead of him.

The goblin trees animated tissue. They wanted to spread. Once they were at the

maximum of their growth, they would cast off their seeds in a small natural explosion.

If something ate the seed, they would stay dormant until the thing died. Once that

happened, the seed would animate the corpse and search for a place to grow without

any predators around.

The trees he had found and cut off from the world had been giants because they were

really more than one of the growths growing together. Nature had reclaimed the rest

with more regular trees like oaks, or pines.

This battleground could probably sprout into such a giant with all the bodies trying

to grow and move.

He winced at a hand trying to figure out where the rest of its arm was and getting

back together.

He needed to cut off all of this. Then he could worry about the ramifications of the

Shemmarians trying to build super soldier monsters like the Howling Commandoes,

or the Midnight Sons.

Someone in command needed the Ghost Rider’s penance stare.

He reached out and grabbed all the active mushrooms he could with his magic. Then

he shut off all their functions such as they were. He waited. The corpses flopped

around as the mushrooms carried on for a few minutes. Then they stopped

completely.

He reached out and asked the world to tell him if there was more active goblin trees

around. He found some seeds getting ready to burst and take off. He stopped that too.

He seemed clear of implantations, and he didn’t see anything in the soldiers he could

sense.

Josie appeared, the ghost form of the Human Bomb taking shape after her explosion.

“I thought we talked about you running off and doing crazy things,” she said as pieces

of her materialized out of the air.

“I don’t think we did,” said Jack. He couldn’t check her as she was now. He would

have to wait until she became normal. He grinned at her.

“We are implementing procedures,” said Josie. She crossed her arms as she watched

golden fire fall a short distance away.

“Really?,” said Jack. He threw a cloud of sleep over the wall and listened to the

soldiers cough while they tried to run out of the cloud before they fell to the ground.

“You have someone now,” said Josie. “You have to give things more thought. Elaine

would break apart if something happened to you.”

“I am not sure about that,” said Jack. “She’s tough, tougher than us.”

“Not the point,” said Josie. “You know it. We are going to hash this out. And I am

going to find you a therapist.”

“A therapist,” said Jack. He said the word with disdain. He had no need for a

therapist. Therapists were for the weak.

“Yes,” said Josie. He could tell she was smiling under the full helmet of the Bomb.

“I even got a quest for it. How do you like that?”

“I would love to see you find a therapist here just to see if you can scavenge one up,”

said Jack.

“If worse comes to worse, I will send a letter to Juni to see what she has to say about

all this,” said Josie. “Maybe arrange a visit from your older sister. The Ducklings

would love that.”

“I triple double dog dare you to do that,” said Jack. He put on the grin to show he

didn’t think she could do that. It felt like a mask because he knew that Josie might be

one of the few people who could arrange a visit from his sister.

“Wait until we get home,” said Josie. “I will set it up as soon as I can. Boom, another

ding.”

“The Society is not going to go for that,” said Jack.

“If Juni shows up, she might be better at this quest stuff than us,” said Josie. “We can

retire on the gold I can make. The girls and I can become nobility while you and

Elaine retire to some backwoods somewhere.”

“What are your demands?,” asked Jack. “Let’s get the blackmail out of the way.”

“Extortion is such a pretty word when I am doing it,” said Josie. “Anyways, it doesn’t

matter. I have two quests to do, so I think getting your sister to visit is going to be

easier than finding you a therapist, so I am going to work on that. Until then, I will

be thinking of worse things to do unless you toe the line. No more weird heavy

construction things. I don’t even want to know what you would have done with a

Tardis. No more running into danger like Riggs. No more single handed stuff where

you are playing things by the ear instead of some kind of plan. Am I understood?”

“That’s how we got Aviras,” said Jack.

“I know,” said Josie. “What would have happened if things had gone the other way?

What would have happened if we had got one of his kin instead of him? Are we

clear? We’re a team. You’re not some kind of weapon to be expended. I am not doing

this alone.”

“Technically, I am a weapon to be expended,” said Jack. He couldn’t help himself for

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the correction. A punch to the face left stinging pain around his eye.

“I decide what gets expended,” said Josie. “Got that?”

“That hurt,” complained Jack. He rubbed his face as his partner took in her

surroundings. He took a moment to make sure she was clear of the goblin tree seeds

now that she was waiting for her watch to recharge.

A ding told them that they had dealt with the quest to the satisfaction of their

employers.

“It was meant to, you dope,” said Josie. She frowned at her watch. “I want you to do

what I say. I’m worried about you, and I don’t like these swerves in your behavior.

They’re more extreme than when we were kids. I don’t want you to hit the guardrails

and go off the mountain.”

“I will take it under advisement,” Jack smiled. He let his persona go. “I think we

should get out of here before one of us is hit with a lucky shot.”

“Jack, Josie?,” said the com band. “I need to know what’s going on.”

“Everything is okay, Elaine,” said Josie. “We have to pull out and let the

Shemmarians try to fix the crater I created.”

“How are you talking to us from Hawk Ridge, hon?,” said Jack.

“The Enterprise is acting as a relay,” said Elaine. “It is close enough to reach your

bands while still talking to me. The job is done?”

“We still have to do the aftermath parts, but this end is finished,” said Jack. “I think

we can get started on that when we know how far Guin and Jane have got on securing

a facility.”

“I will let them know that you are coming home,” said Elaine.

“Elaine?,” said Josie. “Did Mister Warner ever send his old case files?”

“Not yet,” said Elaine.

“I think we should write up the seven official quests we have done to give to him,”

said Josie. “I think I am going to put that on the to do list.”

“Old Man Warner is old,” said Jack. “He ain’t got time for no case files.”

“Maybe,” said Josie. “Can you hear us, Enterprise?”

“Affirmative,” said the machine.

“Transport our party up,” said Josie. “Then we’ll have to go home to see if we can

start freeing people out of storage.”

“We have one more thing to do before we do that,” said Jack. “Elaine, we’re going

to the show tonight like I promised. Pick something you want to see. We have to take

care of this one thing then we will be in Hawk Ridge tonight. I love you.”

“I love you too,” said Elaine.

“Awww,” said Beatrice.

“This is great,” said Matilda. “Wait. I have to tell the others. I’ll be right back,

Beatrice.”

They heard screaming over the open band.

“Enterprise,” said Josie. “Beam us up. Beam up Fass and his Fighters. Then we have

to get a move on to handle the rest of this.”

“Set in a course for the Shemmarian capitol, Enterprise,” said Jack. “We have to have

a meeting with some people.”

The machine didn’t have time to finish its acknowledgments before Josie and Jack

stood in Transporter Room One. They stepped off the pad. The transporter brought

the members of the Fighters back aboard. They looked around at the unfamiliar room.

“This is the usual room that people get teleported from when a part of the crew has

to go planetside,” said Josie. “Are you still there, Elaine?”

“Yes,” said Elaine. “Do you need me right now? There’s a ruckus outside.”

“Go ahead,” said Josie. “I’ll keep Jack contained until we get home.”

“I would like to see that,” said Jack.

Josie frowned at him. She held up her fist. He rubbed his face in sympathy. She

nodded.

“Thank you,” said Elaine. “Thank you, Enterprise, for protecting them like I asked.”

“Affirmative,” said the machine.

“Let’s head up to the bridge,” said Jack. “I need to make sure Aviras hasn’t ripped the

replicator out of the wall for his ice cream, and then we can get ready to talk to the

Shemmarians.”

“What are we going to say to them?,” asked Emily. “Don’t make walking corpses.”

“I think that is the thing we want to say,” said Jack. “Also we need to ask about why

they were trying to make walking corpses in the first place. They seem to have

everything under control.”

The Fighters all had different suggestions on that. Fass kept his own thoughts to

himself. They had been paid to avert a plague. That seemed enough for the moment.

They couldn’t claim any mission rights for it, but they had a solid piece of gold to

show for it.

Jack made sure to ask the Enterprise to scan everybody and make sure they weren’t

carrying the seeds inside of them. The negative result made him smile a genuine

smile.

“If we have to do this again, since we only grabbed up the goblin trees we could look

for with the sensors,” said Jack. “As long as you have someone to pull the seeds out

before you die, you should be okay. You can actually carry them, but when you die,

they try to do their thing. I am going to say they impede your health to make sure you

die faster.”

“That’s good to know,” said Case. “I thought for a minute I might lose something

over this.”

“Why are we going to the Capitol?,” asked Fass.

“I just need to tell the high command what was going on, and why they should think

hard about using monsters as soldiers,” said Jack. “Then we’re headed back to Hawk

Ridge. The Enterprise can put you down at the Adventurers’ Hall from high enough

that no one sees it. It will be an unconfirmed story until enough witnesses report

seeing it.”

“We keep the ugly statue?,” asked the complainer from the back of the crowd.

“If you want, I can turn it into bricks, or something,” said Jack. “The ship should have

a machine shop onboard to do that.”

They reached an elevator.

“All right,” said Jack. “I’m heading up first, to check in with Aviras and to get my

command seat. Who’s riding up with me?”

Fass led the way into the elevator. The Budds followed, then Lou. One of the guys

Jack didn’t interact with much joined them. The doors closed and they headed for the

bridge.

Jack stepped out on the Bridge. He went to the Ready Room and poked his head

inside. Aviras sat on his desk. Another empty bowl of ice cream sat beside him.

“Did you enjoy that?,” asked Jack.

“It was delicious,” said the dragon. A puff of smoke escaped him. “I wish I could

have another.”

“Josie says no,” said Jack. He let the door shut as he went to his command chair.

“Where are we, Enterprise?,” asked Jack. He didn’t know enough about how his

screen worked to guess from the markers.

“We’re above the Shemmarian capitol,” said the machine. “We are outside of normal

ground visual range.”

“All right,” said Jack. “What should I say to convince them not to try this again?”

“I doubt anything you say could be convincing enough for that,” said Fass.

“Too true,” said Jack.

Josie came on the bridge and sat down in the first officer’s seat. She frowned at the

display on the arm of her chair.

“Keep it short and simple,” said Josie. “Reassure them the danger has passed. Their

soldiers are going to report on the Enterprise as a weapon for the crown.”

“And the city saw the Enterprise and heard me talking,” said Jack. “I think everyone

knows their government doesn’t control this.”

Josie made a get on with it gesture with her hand.

“All right,” said Jack. “Let’s do what we have to do so we can do what we want to do.

Elaine probably already has a theater picked out for us while we’re procrastinating.

Enterprise, bring us down to broadcast in the open and then ready the microphones.”

“Affirmative,” said the machine. “Speakers are open.”

“How’s it going?,” said Jack. He grinned at the eye rolling and face palming his

opening got him. “This is Jack again. I wanted to come back and tell you your stupid

plague carrier weapon that would have spread out and killed your country has been

stopped. My crew and I nipped it in the bud. Your staff has been exposed to your

goblin tree nonsense so when they died they might have started spreading things all

inside your castle and killed all of you. They aren’t going to do that now because

we’re going to fix them before we return them. Don’t ever do anything like this again,

or we’re going to have problems. This is Captain Jack Lee of the Are Are Ay Ess

Enterprise signing off.”

“The speakers are off,” said the Enterprise.

“Take us home, Enterprise,” said Jack. “I have a date to get ready for, Josie has some

kids and an ice cream addicted dragon to corral, and the Fighters have a gold thing to

split amongst themselves.”

“Affirmative,” said the machine. It spun to face its new course and engaged its

smaller drives.