Somewhere in his mind, the fear of finally taking on something bigger than he could control triggered an instinct he had buried since that very first day in his bedroom, playing around with the queen. Since that day, he’d never been afraid.

Pissed, yes. Vengeful, sure. Humiliated and righteously enraged, of course. But afraid? That hadn’t really been on the table as a lord of the Nightlands, nor subsequently as one of the only noteworthy paranormal beings that the Inquisition hadn’t managed to murder yet. While he wasn’t a very good blood magus, Theo was great at ripping off the heads of those who had earned his ire. A professional thug.

And here he was, crumpling like a rag doll as the Valkyrie crushed every bone in his body, completely getting his ass kicked. And, as she picked him up by the throat again and slammed his head through another tree, knocking his world into darkness with a predatory scream of rage, that little panicked part of his mind switched on. He saw her reach for what was left of his head, clearly intending to rip it off and, in a total act of instinct, he threw his arms out and jabbed both sets of fangs into her chest with a completely reflexive surge of terror.

As he did, his fangs slammed in deep, dragging out endless amounts of life-force, filling him, revitalizing him, completely overwhelming him with the pure crush of the Valkyrie’s goddess-favored energy. He felt his reservoir swallowing the vitality, sucking her in, pulling more energy than he’d ever pulled from anyone before, and yet it kept coming, flooding in an endless supply of complete bliss that already began to repair his ruined body, piecing it back together with unbelievable ease, tearing away the restraints of his body and mind with something akin to glee.

Where anyone else would have withered into an emaciated husk from the amount of life-force Theo had taken in those brief moments, the Valkyrie didn’t even seem to notice. She didn’t swoon, didn’t cringe, didn’t flinch, just got a little frown between her brows.

Then, slowly, the Valkyrie glanced down at the place where his fangs were buried in her breasts and her eyes went wide. Too late, Theo realized what he had done and pulled his hands back, leaving the glowing silver poison of the Nightlands dribbling down her areolas and nipples.

“You…” she whispered, her hand going limp as she released him to wipe the mercurial liquid from her chest and stare at it in open-mouthed astonishment. “Did you just try to enthrall me, you pig-eared goat-fucker?”

Theo swallowed hard, knowing that not only was it illegal for a vampire to try to enthrall an over-tier with a Nótt Lagsmaðr, but the act of attempting it carried with it a death sentence, to be executed by Odin’s Chosen with Skofnung. He couldn’t reply with his face crushed, however, and his broken legs fell out from underneath him as he collapsed into a boneless puddle on the ground.

The Valkyrie snorted, shaking the silver fluid from her fingers. “You really are stupid. I’m going to enjoy stomping your skull into a gray past—” she froze.

For a moment, the Valkyrie’s glowing blue eyes met Theo’s, and he saw a moment of startled confusion in them. Then she glanced down at the silver venom still smudged across her chest.

“How…?” she managed, swallowing hard. Then she took a step away from him, swallowing again. “How did you…?” She stumbled backwards and fell on her ass, shaking her head like she was drunk.

Theo, for his part, was feeling his body regenerating around him in record speed, powered by the Valkyrie’s own magic. Groaning, he sat up, holding his head, which, moments before, had been crushed and leaking brain matter through his nose.

I’m still alive? he thought, totally unable to believe it. He saw the crumbles of brain on his hand as he pulled his fingers away, then saw the same stuff smeared across the crushed tree that the Valkyrie had put his head through. He gingerly picked the pieces off, smelled them, ascertained that they were his brain, then nervously flicked it off into the ground.

Then he realized the Valkyrie was watching him and he froze.

They sat like that for several long minutes, both staring at the other in nervous horror, neither so much as saying a word.

Theo swallowed, hard. He wasn’t sure how to apologize, knowing that she was going to kill him for attempting to thrall her. It was impossible, of course, for a vampire to enthrall an over-tier. The demigods’ wills and magics were simply too strong. Well, Theo supposed it was hypothetically possible, but only if the intended over-tier thrall was already deeply weakened by some incredible battle with a much more dangerous foe.

You might be reading a stolen copy. Visit Royal Road for the authentic version.

But clearly, by the way she’d put his skull through a tree mainly with the force of her fist pushing his neck through the wood, she had been fine.

But the Valkyrie’s look of horror was only getting worse, and instead of getting up to execute him for the offense, she was remaining solidly on her ass, looking totally dumbfounded. Theo frowned, realizing her face had taken on the temporary slackness of a brand new thrall. Blinking, he jerked his wrists up to stare at his fangs.

“That’s not possible,” he whispered.

“I know what this is,” the woman on the ground whispered. “This has the yellow-livered stink of Loki.”

Theo’s eyes went wide, flinching at even the idea of calling in the trickster god to his already buttfucked life. “Shhh!” he cried. “Do you want to get his attention?!”

She squinted at him. “That’s why the meddling fuckwit went missing. He was playing politics in the First Realm.” Her scowl was darkening.

The way she was looking at him, the Valkyrie thought that Theo was somehow a personal friend of the insufferable fop. “Um, no.”

She continued to look at him like Theo owed her something. “No what?”

“No I’m not involved,” Theo said quickly. “I had nothing to do with this. With him and you. I’m not a follower of Loki. I hate Loki. He made me lose my favorite villa and a whole damned chest of gold to Nökkvi, before I fled the Third Lands.”

She wiped a palmful of the silver fluid from her chest and showed it to him, raising a brow. “Then perhaps you could explain this?”

Theo swallowed hard, eyes drawn to the way her breast bounced as she wiped it clean, trying not to get hard at how her nipples were even then rising to the occasion, still partially covered in his venom. Hell, that was sexy. It was something he’d reserved for his wife, back when—

“My eyes, Loki,” the Valkyrie gritted, “are right here.” She demonstrated.

Theo had never seen a naked Valkyrie before, but he’d heard about them. Their beauty was legendary, usually bragged about by Odinsons who had managed to butcher one on a battlefield. And, now that he wasn’t getting crushed to death, Theo was realizing their curves were in all the right places, their bodies a testament to the goddess of love, beauty, fertility, sex…

The Valkyrie cleared her throat.

Theo forced himself to tear his eyes back to her face, then realized what she’d said and blinked. “Wait, Loki?” Theo guffawed. “You definitely have the wrong guy. I’m a thug. I bash heads together. I’m not a sneaky little mind-weaving girly-man asshole who likes to trick people out of villas and pick fights with Pestilence.”

“That’s what Loki would say,” she said, narrowing her eyes.

Theo opened his mouth to argue with her, and instead a weird little giggle of panic emerged from his chest.

Her eyes narrowed. “Loki laughs like that.”

And he did, too. Flushing, Theo said, “Then he must be in a perpetual state of almost shitting himself in terror,” Theo blurted. “I am not Loki.”

“Prove it to me,” the Valkyrie snapped, as if she believed Theo could simply pull Loki out of a hat and present him in his stead.

“Um, Miss, I’m very sorry,” Theo said, “but there’s been a huge mistake. Like, extraordinarily huge. Collosally, monumentally, galactically huge. I didn’t mean to bring you here. I was trying to open a portal to walk the Void and it fizzled on me.”

She squinted at him. “Then how did you create the runes to summon me?”

Theo laughed in desperation, realizing he must have drawn a thousand different runes trying to remember the right combo to unlock the Void. “Uh.”

Her mouth dropped open. “It was an accident.”

“Yeah.” He swallowed.

“You brought me here by accident.”

“Yeah.”

“And you enthralled me. With the weak piss of a lord’s venom. By accident.”

Theo winced, having hoped that hadn’t been the case. “Um. Yeah?”

The Valkyrie’s face darkened and she got to her feet. Turning to face the black forest around them, the naked Valkyrie raised her voice and shouted, “All right, you pompous ass pustule! Get out here and tell me what in the pig-fucking hell you want!” Theo took the moment to once again appreciate the stunning, ethereal, ball-crushing beauty of what was apparently his new thrall.

There was a moment of silence as her words rang hollowly into the darkness, echoing along the mountainside despite the sound of cars on the highway below. Long moments passed. The Valkyrie squinted at the darkness, then turned back to face Theo. She seemed confused. “You truly don’t serve him? I could’ve sworn you smell like the prick.”

“I give you my oath,” Theo said. “I do not serve Loki.” Nor would he ever. He’d rather be tarred, feathered, set afire, then boiled alive in a vat of shit than serve that conceited, manipulative creep. He said as much.

The Valkyrie analyzed him with the carefulness of a hawk. “For someone who claims they know nothing of Loki, you seem to have had a lot of experience with him.

Theo grimaced, remembering the villa. He’d loved that villa, and now it was in the hands of a shit-flinging barghest. “I’ve had enough.”

The Valkyrie sniffed, looking him up and down. She was keeping her face carefully poised with indifference, but he could see the lines of strain underneath the façade as she fought the Nótt Lagsmaðr.

She’s good at hiding it, Theo thought, watching her. He could still see it easily enough, though. He’d had enough time with thralls that he could read their subtle cues like a book. Odin’s balls, he thought, seeing her desperate inner struggle and realizing just how screwed he really was, I just enthralled a Valkyrie…