“Me?” the goblin said.

Olivander dramatically looked around the otherwise empty chamber.

“Uhh yeah, sorry. I’m a bit nervous. I just used the bathroom, then turned around to see a big guy swinging a sword at me.”

“Understandable. You are a bit of an oddity here though; you don’t have mindrot.”

The whole reason the guild was sending members out to the mine was not to kill goblins, but to put down victims of mindrot. Goblins were a sapient species just like Humans, and outright murdering them would be unconscionable.

“Yes. I…I was spared somehow. The rest of my family…they weren’t so lucky. They came here to get out of the way before the mindrot fully set in. I followed them after about a week — I wanted to cure them. I’m an alchemist, so I thought maybe I can find a way to turn them back.”

Olivander could feel pity for this poor fellow. His whole family infected with a disease that would cause them to become nearly mindless animals. Only capable of aggression and a small amount of self preservation. It was a death sentence, and when an infection took hold, putting them down was a mercy.

The goblin was wrong though. He couldn’t cure the mindrot. It wasn’t called that for fun; it literally ate away at the brain. Recovery or restoration just wasn’t possible. It was a disease that Olivander himself had studied for a time. Once he realized that treatment was not possible, at least not after symptoms started, he decided to focus on prevention. His time had been stretched thin, and he never came up with a viable solution.

Even the supposed "Cure Mindrot" potions the guild hall was selling weren't quite what they seemed. They could treat exposure to mindrot as long as you took it within a day or two. The early symptoms weren't obviously mindrot, so people ignored it until it was too late.

“I’m afraid you might never accomplish your goal. It is a lofty one. Worthy of study, however. I am sorry about your family. I am Olivander. My smelly companion is Gregory.”

“Thank you, Olivander. I’m Fezzic. Would you mind getting these shackles off? My legs are going numb.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, that must be uncomfortable,” Olivander said, waving a hand and dismissing the shackles.

“You know what’s uncomfortable? Being in a literal pit full of shit. Can you please get me out of here?” Gregory called.

“Don’t be a baby, Gregory. This poor man just lost his entire family.”

“I’m going to cure them,” Fezzic said.

“I’m afraid it’s a little late for that. I’m pretty sure Gregory put them all to rest,” Olivander said. “You should probably apologize Gregory.”

Gregory took a deep breath, gagged, and then managed to speak.

“I am sorry about your family, Fezzic. But we did the right thing. They deserved rest,” he called up from the pit.

Fezzic slumped against the table, starting to sob.

“I…I know you’re right. I’m sorry…I should have been a bigger goblin. I just…I just didn’t want to lose them. I wanted to be able to do something, you know? I thought….I thought maybe I could help them. It was selfish.”

Olivander bent over and put a hand on Fezzic’s shoulder. “We all lose people. It’s hard, but those wounds will heal eventually. Now, why don’t you help Gregory here get out of this pit, and I’ll meet you both back on the surface.”

Then Olivander waved open a portal and stepped through. He disappeared and the portal winked shut behind him.

Fezzic wiped his eyes. The humans were right — his family had died weeks ago. The abrupt departure of the magician did bother him a little though.

“Your friend seems like a bit of an asshole,” Fezzic called down to Gregory.

“Honestly, I just met him like two hours ago. I can’t tell if he’s super mean, or super nice. Asshole does seem to fit though,” Gregory called back.

Once Fezzic managed to haul the much larger Gregory out of the pit — a feat that would have impressed even Olivander — he rinsed the man off with a few buckets of questionably clean water, and they started making their way out of the mines. Gregory had the unfortunate task of trying not to lead Fezzic to too many of his dead, earless family members.

When they finally emerged, they found Olivander sitting on a chair at a table, reading a book. It was hard to tell in the now painfully bright desert sun, but it looked like the table, chairs, and book were all faintly glowing.

“Welcome back, I trust you made it out all in one piece? Gregory, you’re looking remarkably clean. Well done,” Olivander stood and took a step forward. Then he took a step immediately back. “Unfortunately, I do not smell with my eyes. You may want to hold your breath.”

Olivander then called forth a sphere of water that completely engulfed Gregory. Little bits of sand moved their way through the water, scrubbing him thoroughly.

Stolen content warning: this tale belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences elsewhere.

Fezzic managed to get out of the way before the sphere popped, and a once again drenched Gregory was deposited on the ground.

“I’m not going to thank you for that,” Gregory said.

“Quite alright, everyone else will,” Olivander said cheerfully.

Fezzic nodded along, then gave Gregory an apologetic look.

“The hand washing water could only do so much.”

“This is it. The worst day of my life.”

Olivander dismissed his impromptu reading room and the trio set out, heading back to Demering.

“What are you going to do now Fezzic?” Gregory asked.

“I’m not sure. Like I said earlier, I’m an alchemist. I guess I’ll try to find some work. But really, my whole village is gone. I just don’t know.”

“You could come and work out at my family’s ranch, if you need somewhere to stay and something to do, that is. No pressure.”

“Thank you, Gregory. That’s awfully nice of you.”

“Happy to help! What about you Olivander?”

“My goal here was just to get some supplies and…” he forgot that he didn’t plan beyond that. What was he going to do? This wasn’t a question he had ever really had to ask himself before. He always knew what he was going to do.

Research. Protect the kingdom. Fight off a demon lord. There were always demands on his time when he had been Arch-magus. But now?

“Olivander?”

He shook himself out of his distracted thoughts.

“I actually have no plans. Do you have any food at that farm of yours? I am quite hungry.”

Gregory laughed.

“Sure! We can swing by the guild hall and then head out to my house.”

* * *

Olivander covertly had Gregory drag Fezzic along for a trip to the market to pick out some new clothes. The goblin had been through a lot, and Olivander thought it was best he didn’t see them exchange a backpack full of goblin ears for silver. He also thought Gregory had been through a lot, and he didn’t need the boy to realize that he had been putting all the goblin ears into Gregory's backpack.

Jeremy, the clerk at the guild hall, greeted Olivander.

“Mr. Platinum Member, did you have a successful goblin hunt?”

“Does anyone like you, Jeremy?”

“I’m actually quite popular.”

“Of course you are. I have sixty-three ears off of thirty-seven goblins. A surprising number of them only had one ear, believe it or not.”

“It happens. Were you able to clear out the entire mine?”

“Yes, I worked with a young man. Gregory. I don’t actually know his surname. He just said ‘of Demering.’”

“Gregory helped you kill some goblins, really?” Jeremy said, skepticism heavy in his words.

Olivander narrowed his eyes at the man, remembering what Gregory had said about being bullied for his class. Despite himself, he found himself liking the boy. He was just so hapless, yet Gregory worked as hard as he could to improve himself. Olivander could respect his drive in the face of adversity.

“Do you know Gregory well?”

“No, not particularly. He’s been coming around here for months. He’s been trying to complete a contract for his copper token, but I was close to giving up hope on him. I feel bad for him — he gets quite a lot of cruft from some of the other local boys. From what I’ve seen though, he’s a hard worker. I don’t think he deserves the trouble. Helping out with this definitely earns him his copper token. He’ll love that.”

“Maybe I was wrong about you, Jeremy.”

“If you want, I can give you a copper token as well. I know you had help with the goblins, but I think you’ve earned it.”

“Nevermind. You are the worst. Just the silver please, Jeremy. I can take Gregory’s copper token to him as well.”

Jeremy chuckled, counting out the contract pay. He handed over that and a shiny copper token, half the size of Olivander’s palm. A guild token.

The token identified the bearer as one who could handle the most basic of contracts. It was barely better than not having a rank at all, but earning the token was a mark of pride for young children who hoped to one day become heroes. Olivander had been one such child, in decades past. He had achieved his dreams, becoming a true hero. The memory of having all his achievements stripped away soured his happiness at seeing Gregory earn one of his own.

Olivander bid farewell to Jeremy, letting the man know he hoped they would never meet again. Jeremy responded with a smile and a wave.

Minutes later, Olivander found Gregory and Fezzic in the nearby market street. What he saw nearly brought him to tears.

“Olivander! Fezzic had a little cash, so we got some kebabs! I saved one for you.”

The kebab was a skewer of juicy grilled meat and charred peppers. The smell of it was one of the greatest things Olivander had ever known. He took it with the same reverence that Gregory had shown his summoned blade.

He didn’t know what to say. So he just started stuffing his face.

There was a spice mix he had never experienced on the meat. It was spicy and sweet, with a hint of smoke from the grill. It was like heaven in his mouth.

He groaned.

“Good right? Who knew rat could be so delicious?” Gregory asked.

Olivander paused, slowly pulling the rest of the kebab away from his mouth.

Gregory couldn’t hold it together and began laughing immediately.

“You got me, Gregory. A fine prank.”

“Whew, sorry. I couldn’t resist.”

“Honestly, after that pit, you should have just given him a rat skewer,” Fezzic said.

“Let’s not give Gregory any more ideas,” Olivander said, swallowing another bite. “By the way, Gregory, I have something for you.”

He pulled the guild token out of his pocket and handed it over.

“Wait! Is this…a copper token!?”

“You earned it. Well done.”

Gregory sprinted away, yelling as he ran.

“Come on! We have to show my mom! Wahooooo!”