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Cursed Reincarnation
cursed to live, cursed to die I

cursed to live, cursed to die I

Rias pendragon

For however long after my strange dream I had dedicated my time to missions to justify me being away from everyone. Obviously, this was a bit of a shock to my long-time friend Alex and my girlfriend Talia. They did understand as I told them hesitantly that I couldn’t sleep for a while after seeing the formless eir. The dream for some reason felt irritatingly realistic. I sometimes thought it wasn’t real and then realized my core was gone or at least changed which it was.

‘Right, I have a glass core now…’ my own thought trailed to the back of my mind. A glass core. This core has many disadvantages compared to the core I had before. It could break easier for one, I couldn’t use as much mana as I could before that dream but strangely enough, I now had an unlimited supply in its bottomless reserve. Something was odd about it however I couldn’t think nor dwell on it for long as something large and thin entered my vision with antlers sprouting out the sides of its head. Its large unnerving devilish grin was complemented by giant eyes bulging out of the sockets.

My body froze out of fear calling back to what I saw as a child when my father had sacrificed himself to save me. This being in front of me wasn’t the maiden but the aura around it felt oddly familiar which made this encounter even more terrifying. The being in his horrific glory strode towards me as the metal on his rusted and ink-covered armour moved randomly almost like a snake crawling all over him. Through all this, the only thing I could look at was the symbol on his chest. Three horned skulls on a rope carved into the chest piece directly where the mana core was just in front of the heart.

I tightly grip my kintsugi ornately designed black raven steel odachi gifted to me from Princess Lyra Reef-maw. With all the strength I could try and muster, I tried to swing but to no avail. The being before me spoke with a rasp that sent cold shivers down my spine with every syllable spoken. His sharp black nailed fingers ran themselves across my cheek leaving a slight tear in the skin that began to bleed gold. His pale blood eyes stared into my own golden eyes with a sense of familiarity.

“Are you… her descendant? No, you are too much like her… who are you?” The being asked with a snarl that got caught with a choking raspy cough. I didn’t dare speak as the being looked me up and down before griping my face in his sharp nailed pale hand and looking even further into my eyes. Like he was searching for something. “So, you are her… it’s time you died once again artura.” He smiled speaking a name that wasn’t familiar to me, I tried to wrestle out of his grip. My weak human body wouldn’t budge, he was a lot stronger than his slim frame seemed.

“I-I’m not her…” I spat through laboured breaths. The being just nodded in acceptance and dropped me to the floor.

The being smiled summoning a large halberd-like weapon to his right hand which was covered in bloodied and age bandages. Only noticing this now it seemed his neck and the underside of his body were as well like they were fused to his body. Out of a blind horror and fear I desperately closed my eyes which made him laugh in excitement like he was getting a high or a slight amusement from it. “Who would’ve thought a pendragon would fear for their life… the maiden was right you are just a child playing the hero.” The being laughed as he stepped towards me.

Gripping me by the ripped skin of my neck, I was slowly lifted off the ground. From the fear raking around my head, I closed my eyes tight. Suddenly I felt the sinking sensation of an open wound and the shattering of my glass core.

He dropped me with the halberd still firmly planted into my chest its inky exterior started to drip onto my face and into the open wound making me feel even more pain from its molten heat. Struggling to keep myself together, trying to pull myself onto my elbows, I spoke gripping my throat with one hand and my other hand supporting my weight.

“Wh-who are you?”

“Oh, who am I… that’s a good question.” He said scratching his cheek, kneeling down next to me twisting his neck with a very recognisable horrific smile. As the rain started to pour down onto the yuletide snow and the dead barren trees of Riel’s Mountain woodland he spoke without the rasp of old age, almost clearly with no sense of horror but passion. “Call me…” for a moment he paused gripping the halberd and yanking it out, accompanied by me letting out a gut-wrenching, blood-curdling scream that made even the ravens fly in the morn.

“How about Ludwig?” He asked expecting an answer. His face morphed and changed from the horrific image to a smart-looking, well-groomed male of around twenty-two with slick back combed blonde hair and sapphire blue eyes and shockingly enough white makeup. “Call me Ludwig annex. The skull king.” He smiled plunging his hand inside my chest crushing several ribs in the process. His face didn’t falter in expression as he gripped my heart and pulled. Prying it free of my body.

He licked my blood mimicking how a vampire would do it seductively. My conscious mind started to fade as the beating of my torn-out heart rippled in my ears, the last thing I saw was a gentle smile on his face. I didn’t speak as the rain poured down onto my bloodied and torn open chest, my golden-coloured bloodied heart placed beside me rotten. “Until the eclipse.” Ludwig spoke disappearing into the fog beyond my fading vision.

‘Luna… get my mother please.’ I mumbled crying out to my bond that ran from me loud pounding footsteps accompanying them. Thankfully she wasn’t seen by Ludwig Annex.

I tried to speak through my own voice but nothing… no noise yet I had everything to speak perfectly.

“Please my lady, don’t try to speak. Call the madam her daughter has woken up.” The doctor holding my left shoulder smiled nodding to the maid who ran immediately out of the room to find my mother. Trying to speak again I was stopped halfway and given a board that I could write on to show what I was trying to say. ‘How long?’

“Three weeks. It seems your body was practically frozen dead when your bond led us to you. Your mother came with me alone alongside Duke Leonhart. They’ve only just left your side… even pleaded to the king no doubt.” I quickly rubbed off my board and wrote down the next thing I wanted to ask ‘What about my core?’

“It’s there but it’s almost machine-like as they say in Pthulminth. You have the heart of a machine this mana core also has a bottomless reserve…” he paused no doubt thinking what he was about to say could either ruin my chances of staying as a queen's guard or heighten them. It would be pretty poor luck to be sixteen, become a queen's guard the youngest ever, and then retire to find another profession immediately.

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“I think you should just look at yourself instead of me pointing it out.” He said getting up from his seat and leaving the room, telling me also that he would make sure I wasn’t disturbed until I got my bearings. This would give me ample time to assess my current situation and see what I look like now. Breathing in I stepped from my bed onto the cold cream marble floor of my room. As I wobbled trying to balance, I reached out to grip the old, dark burgundy nightstand that stood by the right side of my ornate bed frame.

‘I’ve got to get my bearings quick.’ Speaking internally to myself would become quite the experience as now my vocal cords were damaged to the point they couldn’t be repaired by normal magic or even healing mana made from wind, air or plasma mana. Lightly touching my throat, I twisted my body along with my head to face the large oblong mirror that sat planted in the right corner of my room. They sat beside the large oak doors which I locked from the inside.

My bond Luna wanted to speak but kept her tongue when I started to slowly untie my nightgown. The thin fabric of the nightgown followed my body shape naturally with gracious folds and twists. I left myself stunned as I peered at the mirror with my naked body fully exposed to the elements. ‘I’m paler than I was… I’m thinner yet I show more muscles through my lean build.’ Maybe the way I saw myself in a mirror was slightly altered but I was indeed paler and thinner not twig width but that of an average female manual labour worker who spends most of their time in mines.

Other than the obvious change in weight, my left hand was now black from the tips of my fingers to the branch-like effect it had imprinted just below my elbow. This wasn’t the only physical appearance change on my body, I seemed to also have runic symbols inked into my flesh. Both sides of my upper body, back and entire right arm along with my hand plus my upper chest were covered in them perfectly shaped around my cleavage. My right leg had a prevalent tattoo, a Nihon dragon inked into my leg’s entire length from the waist down to the ankle. Spinning on my heel I turned to my back and saw the several runes descending my spine.

Each rune symbolised a different type of mana, taking on its own colour and form to represent that particular type. In no particular order, it descended from earth to wind or air mana to fire then to lightning and then water with the last one being plasma. Taking another look at my right arm had some large runes mixed in starting from the shoulder down to my right hand in the ancient language of tramonic, this runic script was difficult to understand compared to Onrath’s ancient language form of Latin.

Moving away from the runes I turned to my eyes and the markings under and around them. I couldn’t place their meanings as they were of an ancient language forgotten in the sand of time. The runes had a meaning I was sure of it, not that I could gather what runic script it was. As I looked at the runes closely, I noticed a strange pattern in my left eye which hadn’t been there before.

In my left eye was a black imprint of a widow spider covering some of the gold of my Iris, assessing it even further I noticed my eye also had a slight reddish blue tint to it. Not quite purple but slightly close to it at the very least. My eyes seemed to also be a lot more hollow feeling then they were before.

“Hey, are you taller?” Luna asked staring up at me from her curled spot on my king’s sized bed. Breaking the silence, I tried to murmur that she was right. I was taller only slightly though maybe a couple inches from my original height. ‘Maybe not… a bit taller.’ I thought looking at my height once again. My height had gone from five foot ten to six foot two, in a matter of three weeks.

The last thing I checked just as someone knocked on my door was my hair. The unkempt nature of my wolf cut was exactly at the length I left it when leaving my home that day. The colour was slightly changed however. The black became a slightly lighter ashy colour with the gold highlights of my hair taking on a dimmer hue. Among my natural locks of gold and black, I happened to find out I now had dark red highlights mixed in as well.

After I opened the door with my clothes on which now didn’t really fit me, I came into sight with three people. My mother Vanessa stood behind my sister Sifta who wore a bright smile that matched her ever-so-present crimson leather coat and beside her was my girlfriend Talia who jumped into my arms wrapping her own around me. Before I could explain anything by writing it down and showing them. My mother raised her hand.

“We know… the doctor told us that you can’t talk because of your damaged vocal cords. It seems the decaying mana of the witch did a number on them to the point you have to write down what you want to say.” My mother said solemnly walking towards me with a box in one of her hands. sifta then tapped my shoulder giving me a small necklace with a pendant hanging on it. A wolf and dragon. The symbol of the pendragons.

“A tailor has come to make us new clothes for the season… I’d like it if you would join us this time.” Sifta said placing the pendant necklace around my neck. It didn’t take long for me to figure out why exactly I was to come with them as I had grown taller which meant, I’d have to take my measurements again. Accepting this I followed my sister closely down the hallways of my family’s manor towards the lounge area where the tailor was waiting for us all.

In my three weeks of unconsciousness which only felt like a few hours I had somewhat forgotten the shape and design of the hallways I would roam through when I was doing my duties as a queen’s guardsman. The hallways of simplicity were designed with ornate carvings of animals and runic symbolism to honour our ancestors along with the pendragon bloodline.

After a short few minutes, I found myself before the large oak doors that led into the lounge area where the tailor was waiting for us. I looked around staring at the ornate carvings that ran along the skirting boards and pillars which all intersected at one painting hanging alone in the entryway to the lounge. A painting of my father, born of a tramonic noble house. He was a foreigner to my family yet through a blood marriage he unexpectedly gained our family’s ‘curse’.

I didn’t understand it fully myself so my sister and mother explained the curse was something inherited from Artura Pendragon the last of our family to sit on a throne. To my thinking, my father wasn’t supposed to gain this curse as he wasn’t born a pendragon, yet he was given it somehow. Some of our ancestors called this curse a gift whereas my close family called it for what it was a curse. My mother wasn’t bothered by this turn of phrase neither was my sister.

Resigning my thoughts I pushed open the oak doors saying goodbye to Talia who patiently waited outside the lounge. I smiled watching her white and pink hair flop down her shoulders to nestle gently against her back. Looking back at me with a smile of her own, her pink eyes burnt brightly with passion.

Upon entering the lounge, I sat across from the tailor and his assistant who was a thin blonde girl with violet eyes. The tailor master was a small elderly gentleman who was clearly close to retirement. The way he held himself just sitting in the armchair across from me showed he just wanted his career to end.

“It’s good seeing you all again. My lady Rias, I hope you get better soon.” The tailor spoke slowly through his wheezing breath. As I couldn’t speak with my own voice plus the fact, I didn’t want to write every word I wanted to say, my mother decided to explain what we needed which was new clothes all of us including my brother who currently wasn’t present as he was serving in the riel knights corps. “I see well we should start with measurements and then choose designs later. Even make some if you're feeling that.”

From behind a folding screen away, I took off my shirt and bra in front of the female apprentice who was taking my measurements. She seemed rather nervous about getting close to my upper body as a woman no older than twenty-three. Using a delicate touch she measured my waist, wrist width the length of my arms and shoulders along with the total length of my legs. She became even more nervous when it came to measuring the size of my bust, it showed in her shaking hands and trembling soft delicate fingers.

“My lady, can you lift your arms.” The apprentice pulled the measuring tape tight around me after I lifted my arms to a straight position completely out. Through shaken fingers she was able to take my measurements, a sigh of relief left both of us when we were done with the new measurements. When that sigh of relief left both of us, a feeling of calm washed over me.

“Now it’s up to you, my ladies. First clients of the new design…” The tailor paused pulling out a two-hundred-page folder with descriptions and diagrams of new designs. From ornate dresses to frilly shirts to slim-fitting trousers. Among all of them, one single clothing design stood out to me. A pair of ripped trousers and a black crop top to match having an open back made of lace going from one side to the other.

“I see. These boots as well?” The tailor asked and I nodded in agreement. The crop top and rip slim fit trousers along with the boots fitted together remarkably well together probably with the purpose being one design.

“She seems to love those… I’ll have a couple made at least.” My mother smiled watching my sister and I pick out clothing for the entire family including new servant clothes along with new outfits for the maids. Which over time gradually got more expensive mainly showing different heights of power like a head maid or head butler. Before the tailor could pull out another book of seasonal designs, I stopped him giving him a design I had drawn, Trying to give it to him without anyone seeing.

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