7

Licephus Akamefuna

"Okay, would you rather swim in a dye pit or one of the eel pits?"

"That's an easy one for me," Jeshu answered. "I would never get the dye out."

"But just imagine all the eels crawling over you!" Cricket said. The two walked close to a covered wagon as the caravan made its way through the narrow back tunnels.

"I am accustomed to the close proximity of animals. I used to sleep on the bare forest floor. Beetles would hide under me. Spiders would weave webs in my little branches."

Cricket shuddered. "I can't stand bugs."

"That's ironic." Jeshu stated as he lowered his head to dodge an outcropping of rock.

"You know what I mean."

"I truly do not," Jeshu said patiently.

"Little bugs. I can't stand little things crawling on me. I would pick the dye over the eels."

"That's hardly fair. Dye would barely stain your black shell."

Cricket shrugged.

"Once a bird tried to make a nest on my head. That's like a bat," the dryad clarified. "I was sympathetic, but I couldn't allow that."

"The bats here are bigger than you're imagining." Oydd joined the conversation.

"I forget everything is bigger down here."

"Not everything!" Cricket reminded the druid cheerfully.

"Ah, yes. Salamanders. Are they truly so pathetic in the underworld?"

"Like this big!" Cricket held his thumb and forefinger apart. "No teeth, no scales. And they live in puddles."

Jeshu looked over at Oydd for confirmation.

The rudra smiled. "He is correct. For the most part."

Jeshu scoffed. "Well, picture an azaeri small enough to fit in my hand with feathers large enough to fly. That is a bird."

"Sounds a bit far-fetched," Cricket declared, looking to the rudra for confirmation.

Oydd groaned. "Surely my knowledge has a greater utility than settling your petty disputes."

"Oh, I doubt it. If there really were an all-knowing being, I think his main function would be settling petty disputes." Cricket kicked a rock down the trail. It bounced from a wagon wheel and then into the boot of one of his gnoll companions. The hyena man barked and shot Cricket a nasty look.

Cricket lowered his voice. "Why do we even need them?"

"It does seem a bit overkill," Oydd observed. "I count twenty-two men. That's not including the vampire. He may be worth twenty men on his own.

"And to guard what? A few wagons?" Oydd continued. "I don't enjoy being kept in the dark."

The vampire lord, Licephus, walked before the lead wagon without a personal guard. He rested his hand calmly on the jeweled hilt of his sabre, his head held high, looking down his nose at the trail.

A single cave lizard of a modest size pulled the wagon, and Patches sat on its head, watching the vampire with fascination. A squat, brown goblin led the lizard by the reins, hopping barefoot over the uneven rock.

Behind them, Ty'lek and a second azaeri archer stood sentry on the flat wagon bed accompanied by several seated gnolls, including the taskmaster with a coiled whip. Somehow he had managed to coax the goblin into taking his job. He now made use of his leisure time by swatting away mosquitoes and picking at the grime beneath his yellow toenails with a rusty dagger.

The head wagon pulled a smaller cart carved from the upturned ribs of a whale drake, stuffed with various sacks, casks, and baskets secured with a greasy black rope.

Two more cave lizards followed the bone cart, one heavily-laden with provisions, sleeping mats, oil, candles, rope, dried mushroomwood logs and smoked jerob larvae to ward off batwolves.

The other lizard rested for his turn to pull the main cart. A covered wagon followed, and then Cricket, Jeshu, and Oydd on foot.

Oydd brought the reanimated corpse of the goblin he had been working on in the lab. Jagged shards of copper covered its head, shoulders and shins. Oydd had also fashioned long blades of copper on each finger, like claws, and treated them with a magic to prevent bending or dulling. He named the abomination Kaser, because of its sharp talons. And he insisted on calling it a ghoul, because "zombie denotes an inferior creation."

In the rear, the colossal lizardman, Agena, stood atop an equally imposing cave lizard, on an unrailed platform nearly as wide as one of the wagons.

The lizardman guarded a large, black chest with a shiny, cinder-like sheen. He held his spear erect on the platform for balance, unusually steady on the lurching beast.

Only Agena, Cricket had been informed, was allowed atop the platform. Although, Cricket ran a few scenarios in his head where he would likely be forgiven for jumping up to aid the lizardman. Almost every scenario involved Agena failing to fight off an assailant in an imaginary tussle. Which, Cricket sighed, was unlikely.

The wagon train passed a series of ruts, bouncing and jostling the gnolls.

Jeshu waited for things to quiet down, and then said, "Okay, I have one. You can only eat one food for the rest of your life."

"Eel." Cricket said without a thought. "I don't want them crawling on me, but they're delicious. Raccoon makes this sweet sauce with rotten fish..."

"Fermented fish," Oydd replied.

Cricket grimaced. "You'd only eat fermented fish?"

"No," Oydd waved off the insectoid in annoyance. "The sauce he makes uses fermented fish, not rotten fish."

"So what would you pick?" Cricket asked.

"Ah!" Oydd exclaimed, at some fond memory. "There was one time I had a delectable meat served with butter and blue cheese. I believe it was a surface crab."

"We just call them crabs," Jeshu replied.

"Well they're nothing like the ceiling crabs we have here," Oydd said, indignant. "So I need some way to differentiate them."

"You can call yours ceiling crabs," Jeshu joked.

The covered wagon came to a stop, blocking most of Cricket's view. He heard voices up ahead.

Oydd growled in annoyance. He motioned to Cricket and Jeshu. "Wait here." Oydd disappeared around the wagon and Kaser followed.

*****

The mouseling pushed up on her front paws until she was nearly sitting, and stretched her back. She watched the vampire, transfixed by the grace of his movement. As he walked, his head remained level, not bobbing up and down like the gnoll guardsmen. Patches took a look behind her, where a hyena spearman had passed out on the wagon with a cask in his hand. Wine drizzled down his hairy chin. His tongue lolled out the side of his open mouth and he occasionally sniffled and snorted in his sleep.

Patches looked at the vampire again. Each piece of his clothing was clean, his loose blouse tucked into his leather pants. His boots made a dependable, consistent pattern in the mud. Not a single, long grey hair out of place, as far as she could see.

The mouseling decided that beauty was somewhere between the two. Not snoring on patrol, but not perfect order either. A witch would probably strike a balance. Grace and crudeness. Order and discord. Life and death. Not just death, she thought, watching the vampire again in a trance.

Patches yawned, revealing tiny bucked teeth, then smacked her tongue a couple times and closed her eyes.

Her ride came to a sudden halt, and Patches jolted awake.

Before Licephus stood two dhampiri—a masked male, and a one-eyed female, both with shaved heads. Two gnoll spearmen ran toward the vampire lord from behind, but he waved them off without a backward glance.

When she recognized the vampire, the female took a step back.

The masked man knelt and spoke. "My lord, we did not expect to see you this night."

"I suppose not," Licephus replied evenly.

The man looked to the woman and bade her to kneel at his side.

"Are you disappointed?" Licephus asked.

From a distance, the mouseling saw that the man trembled.

Licephus continued. "Now why would that be disappointing? I can't imagine why my presence would be anything but a stark relief. Unless of course..."

"No," the man held up a webbed hand. A thin, white leather stretched between his fingers, and down from the elongated pinky nearly to the elbow, like an undeveloped wing. He lifted his other arm out of habit, though the limb ended in a stump just past the elbow.

"Unless of course you had planned something nefarious tonight. Something that might bring shame to our church and our king?"

The woman threw herself at the vampire's feet. "Please, forgive us. We would never raise a weapon against you."

The mouseling wagged her tail absently, watching the one-eyed woman pleading, evidently for her life.

"Oh, I think we're beyond that." Licephus drew his sword and swung it at her neck in a clean arc.

The woman jumped back in time, Patches thought, but a moment later she dropped to her knees and her bald white head dropped to the black stone, rolling along the tunnel floor.

Her blood appeared on the vampire's blade, then dripped and pooled in the bowl-like crossguard, where it absorbed into the metal like water into a dry sponge.

Cricket groaned with boredom. He released two sickles from his back and spun one in circles with a flick of his wrist.

"Did you give up on swords?"

"Oh, yeah," Cricket said, excited. "Swords are worthless against skeletons. Also, I feel like they're too long range. I like to be up close. So I'm going to try these out."

"Swords are too long range?" Jeshu repeated, uncertainly.

"Yeah, they're like ten times longer than daggers. And I like daggers the most."

"Then why not use four daggers?" the dryad counseled.

"That seems… unimaginative."

Cricket noticed Agena crouching to spy ahead between the low ceiling and the top of the covered wagon.

Cricket!

Cricket jumped then looked around for the source of the sound.

Cricket, can you hear me?

The voice originated from inside of his head. And yet, somehow the insect recognized it as Oydd's voice.

Don't trust the gnolls!

The voice faded, somewhat strained at the end.

"Did you hear that?" Cricket asked Jeshu.

"Hear what?"

A gnoll appeared beside the covered wagon, running back toward Agena. Cricket glanced at Jeshu, and saw the dryad was too relaxed to defend himself. He waited until the last moment and then lunged at the gnoll, slashing its throat wide open with a sickle.

Jeshu nearly screamed but caught the noise in his throat. "Wh... what?"

"I think we're under attack."

Jeshu readied his hammer as three more gnolls rounded the wagon. Jesh swung at the one nearest him, but the hyena shifted in its run, dodging the hammer and leaving the druid off-balance. The second gnoll ran up the druid's back then leapt to Agena's platform.

The last gnoll rushed Cricket, thrusting with its spear. The insect caught the shaft in the curve of a sickle and redirected the tip. He swung the second sickle at the gnoll's head and the creature ducked right into the dagger in Cricket's lower arm. Cricket followed up with a second swing of a sickle, nearly removing the creature's head.

A gnoll ducked under Agena's spear and wrapped its arms around his legs, taking a nasty kick to the throat. The other gnoll launched himself over his comrade and plowed into the lizardman's chest. Together the three of them rolled over the edge of the platform, accentuated by the hyenas' whooping, snickering laughter.

Unlawfully taken from Royal Road, this story should be reported if seen on Amazon.

Cricket tensed, fighting the urge to climb up to the forbidden platform, choosing instead to assist Agena.

The lizardman punched and clawed at one of the gnolls so brutally and efficiently that he might have killed it a second time before he noticed its neck had snapped in the fall.

Agena stood effortlessly as the remaining gnoll bit down on his forearm and dug its hind legs into his belly, failing to penetrate the lizardman's tough hide.

Agena held it still by the back of the neck while Cricket rammed a dagger up under its jaw. The lizardman tossed the body aside and made his way back to the cave lizard.

Another gnoll appeared around the far side of the wagon. It leapt over Jeshu's head and scrambled onto the platform.

Cricket took one step before Agena stopped him, holding the insect back with an immovable arm. Cricket looked to him confused, and then up to the platform where the gnoll gingerly approached the black chest and lifted the lid.

Cricket made one more effort to push past the lizardman, but Agena held him firmly in place.

As the gnoll peered into the opened chest, the shiny cinder coating began to shimmer and undulate. And before the gnoll could react, eight thick tentacles wrapped around its head and pulled its squirming body into the opening.

Even from the ground, Cricket heard the crunching of bones and the muted cackling death throes of the warrior.

The walls of the chest slowly changed to a deep crimson color, and softened, almost melting back as it formed into a bulbous head. The mimic octopus crawled over its broken prey severing tendons with its sharp black beak, tearing limbs with its powerful tentacles as it ingested its meal.

Jeshu raised a hand to scratch the cave lizard's chin, attempting to calm the creature as Agena climbed back onto the platform.

The engorged mimic cuddled up against Agena, caressing him with its rolling tentacles, and the lizardman petted it softly on the head, massaging his knuckles into its neck.

The octopus changed colors to a contented blue.

Cricket wiped the blood from the sickle onto his belt, then ran around the far side of the wagon, where there was more room to maneuver.

He encountered no one as he made his way to the front of the train, which meant every gnoll had either run back toward Agena or forward toward Licephus.

Cricket saw Oydd first, sheltering behind his own creation. Kaser fought in frenzied bursts, shredding any foe daring enough to approach the blood-soaked ghoul. The undead goblin was covered in so much gnoll blood that Cricket would have thought its skin was red if he didn't know better.

When the ghoul finished leveling the last threat to its master, it leaned over the nearest corpse and began to feed, slurping and sloshing noisily.

The vampire Licephus engaged a giant serpent, the likes of which Cricket had never seen. Licephus floated in the air, battling from a distance, flitting effortlessly away from the monster's fangs each time it struck.

The mouseling clung to his back, near his shoulder, and the vampire seemed unbothered by her presence.

Now and then he slashed his sword through the air and a gash appeared on the great serpent as though it were right in front of him. Here and there a gnoll skulked about in the shadows, terrified to approach and join the pile of its mutilated brethren at his feet.

Cricket watched as a dhampir summoner in a mask drew symbols on the floor with black salt.

As the serpent fell to the vampire lord's enchanted strikes, the summoning circle blazed to life, opening like a doorway to another world, and new horrors emerged, squirming in a pool of slime or stumbling off on too many legs.

Oydd arrived at Cricket's side.

"Licephus hasn't been touched. He can hold off these aberrations." Oydd shouted to be heard over the wind blasting from the magical doorway. "I'll pick off the guards. Can you get to the summoner?"

Four gnolls still stood between Cricket and the dhampir.

Cricket nodded. "How fast can your ghoul move?"

"It can keep up with you."

Cricket sprinted toward the right flank and the ghoul sped by in such a flash that Cricket paused and had to compose himself before chasing after.

Kaser tackled the closest gnoll, then tore into its chest like a burrowing animal, tossing chunks of bone and meat to the left and right.

Cricket hopped over the raging ghoul, and ducked under a swinging axe. But he ignored its source, focusing on the summoner. He circled around as he ran to keep the gnolls in view, but met no more resistance. In a moment, he was by the surprised dhampir's side. He crossed his arms and pulled both sickles across the summoner's exposed throat, clipping all the soft tissue back to the neck bone.

The summoner's jaw dropped beneath his mask, but he made no sound.

Cricket ran a little further before turning, in case an enemy was on his tail unnoticed, but the tunnel was clear.

The summoning door on the floor slowly closed as molten rock boiled up from the other side. A bubbling, red-hot head emerged, and then two arms of lava splurted through. The elemental had only half-surfaced when the door closed, pinching it off at the waist.

Licephis landed at Cricket's side. "Thank you," the vampire breathed. Words that he would never hear from a dhampir. The dhampiri never acknowledged any other race. At best they viewed them as chattel.

Cricket gawked, amazed that the vampire had spoken to him.

"This creature was summoned," Licephus pointed with his sword. "So it won't be dispelled by its master's death. Help me protect the cargo."

With that, the vampire flew forward through the air at an unbelievable speed, leaving Cricket to nod dumbly to no one in particular then chase after his heels.

Licephus floated around the elemental slashing from a distance. However, the trick proved ineffective, simply splashing jets of lava that slowly reformed. The whole creature darkened and cooled in places, only to erupt white hot anew from beneath the blackened crust.

From this angle, Cricket saw Ty'lek and the other azaeri loosing arrows at the remaining gnolls. Ty'lek missed more often than not, while the other archer picked off targets one after another.

Oydd kept Kaser away from the magma creature and grabbed Cricket by the arm as he tried to run past.

"What are you doing?" Oydd shouted. "You can't hurt that thing."

Cricket hesitated. "I can't do nothing."

"You can. Doing nothing is better than doing something stupid."

"You must have a spell that would help."

Oydd shook his head. "I've already pushed too hard."

Cricket saw Jeshu in the distance, just passing the front wagon, but realized the druid would be just as ineffective with his hammer and bark skin.

"What should we do?" He asked the rudra.

"If Licephus can't stop it, then we are too weak to stop it." Oydd still yelled, though the wind had died down. He lowered his voice. "I'm at a loss."

Cricket pulled his arm away from the rudra and ran after Licephus. He sifted through his pouch and pricked his finger. He felt around the offending blade and pulled it from the pouch. One of the shurikens.

Oydd had said he didn't know what it would do, but guessed it would release some magic on impact.

To Cricket, it seemed like a good time to find out. Cricket pulled the shuriken to his side, underarm. When he got within a decent range he threw with all his strength at the immense elemental. And missed by a wide margin.

The throwing star clattered to the floor on the far side beneath the vampire, and as it struck the stone a patchwork of frost spread in all directions on the ground, followed by streaming waves of flickering purple electricity.

The vampire swerved around the elemental, dodging a splash of molten rock a moment later.

"Can you do that again?" He asked the insect.

Cricket grumbled to himself, hating to waste a second shuriken. But then, he couldn't use them at all if he was dead.

Cricket forced himself to grab another throwing star, though the thought nearly drove him to tears. This time he lifted it above his head, pinching it between his thumb and forefinger and threw it like a dart.

The shuriken struck the side of the creature, but simply stuck in the soft magma and began to ooze downward with the flow.

Cricket screamed and stomped his foot, eyes wide. He screamed again and pulled at his antennae in frustration as he ran back toward the rudra.

"Just wait." Oydd whispered. "Look!"

Cricket frowned and turned to look at the shuriken. Sure enough, it started to glow red from the heat—then white, and suddenly it burst, sending magical frost over the molten puddle, reaching nearly to the monster's neck. Waves of lightning followed and one of the enormous arms burst from the inside, splattering along the floor. This time it did not reform.

The elemental reached for the vampire one last time with its remaining arm and then splashed against the rocks burbling and bubbling as it cooled.

Oydd and Ty'lek began looting bodies for trinkets while Cricket and Licephus stood around the sizzling corpse of the elemental. The mouseling hopped down from the vampire's back but Licephus paid her no regard. The vampire stared at the insect coldly. "The summoner died by my blade. Do you understand?"

Despite his menacing tone, Cricket understood this as a kindness. He bowed slightly to acknowledge the gesture. "How was that summoner so strong?" Cricket asked.

In response, the vampire retrieved the severed head of the dhampiress and held it up for the insectoid's inspection.

"What do you notice?"

Cricket scratched his head. "She's pretty ugly."

Licephus ignored the remark and waited patiently.

"Umm..." Cricket took another stab. "She's shaved and missing an eye?"

"And the man?"

Cricket thought hard.

The druid joined them and answered, "He was missing an arm."

"Recently severed," the vampire added. "If you survey the gnolls, you should find other missing body parts. Perhaps toes and fingers." Licephus tossed the head into the pooling magma.

"Which means?" The druid asked.

"I don't know," Licephus confessed. "Can your necromancer friend commune with the dead?"

Yes," Jeshu answered. "I've seen him do it before."

"Good. Have him glean what he can from the dhampiri. I doubt the underlings know much, other than where to be and who to kill."

"I'll get him." Cricket motioned for patches to follow, but in response the mouseling clung tightly to the vampire's cape, and Cricket left to retrieve the rudra on his own.

"Look at this." Oydd held up the wrist of a dead gnoll. He rolled the palm toward Cricket, revealing a mark burned onto the wrist. A three-fingered hand.

"Same as ours. So?"

"This gnoll arrived with the dhampiri. Why were we fighting our own?" Oydd dropped the gnoll's hand. "I have to see the dhampiri's bodies." He started toward the female.

"Actually, Lord Licephus ordered you to probe the corpses."

"That's no problem, but I should start with the male. I don't have a lot of energy left."

The dhampir wore noble clothing, now soaked with dark blood—the red and white silk his kind preferred, with gold detailing. The mask had fallen off of his face. In death he bared his fangs menacingly.

"I don't need to speak to his soul to learn who he is." Oydd knelt and pulled a necklace from beneath the dhampir's blouse, revealing a three-fingered charm on a thin gold chain. He slipped the necklace from the noble's neck, then placed a hand on the dhampir's shaved head.

He spoke no words, but the veins on the side of his head pulsed and throbbed. After a minute he released his grip. "I've learned what I can. Come."

Cricket stooped to retrieve the mask.

"That is the mask of the betrayer," Oydd said. "It grants power to those who turn on their allies. We have no need of it."

Cricket picked up the mask anyway and began to slip it into his pack.

Oydd scowled, his tone a bit defensive. "Did you listen to me? What need do you have of that?"

"You never know." He stood to leave as the rudra grumbled.

Cricket stretched his upper arms behind his head as he walked, twiddling his thumbs. "Can you talk without talking now? You warned me about the gnolls."

"You heard me?" Oydd grinned. "I am learning. Right now I am very limited. But my species gains many such powers with age."

"You don't get weaker with age?"

"Our bodies, yes. But our minds grow stronger until the day we die."

When they reached Licephus, Oydd presented the necklace to the vampire. "The Right Hand, which I'm sure you knew."

"Yes," Licephus answered without looking up, his arms folded, one hand resting again on the hilt of his sheathed sword.

Jeshu eyed the three-fingered charm. "The same as the symbol on our wrists."

Oydd nodded. "The Right Hand of the King."

"They're the Right Hand too?" Cricket asked, bewildered.

"You're not one of the Right Hand," Oydd snapped irritably. "You belong to the Right Hand. These," he waved at the head of the dhampiress burning atop the heap of blackening lava. "Are essentially our owners."

Oydd looked to Licephus for confirmation. "I would assume Lisander and Ysandra of Verimogne."

"Yes." Licephus brought a finger to his lips, as if in thought.

"Lisander the king?" Cricket interjected.

"No," Licephus corrected. "Just courtiers. Lisander is a popular name among the dhampiri."

"We belong to the Right Hand?" Jeshu whispered crisply in Cricket's ear. "I asked you specifically who the Right Hand was, and you said you didn't know."

"You asked about the Left Hand!"

"That doesn't seem relevant?"

"You really should verify any information you receive from Cricket," Oydd censured. "Both refer to the hands of King Akinaska, lord of the dead. In mythology, his left hand held a cloth and judged the worth of his followers. His right hand held a scythe and executed punishment. The dhampiri use the terms symbolically. The Left Hand manages the internal affairs of the kingdom, and the Right Hand manages external affairs, like warfare. Incidentally, the term has come to simply refer to physical strength, and so the Left Hand represents intellect."

Licephus returned from his thoughts. "Which means a coup."

He dismissed Jeshu and Cricket, speaking in private with the rudra for several minutes.

Three gnolls surrendered, and the vampire lord executed them on the side of the road. He ordered the others to continue to their destination, but departed the caravan at the next crossroads.

During the panic, the lead cave lizard had inadvertently trampled its goblin goad beneath its twisted claws, and Agena took up the rope, trudging along silently. With the lead lizard heading in the right direction, the others knew what to do and the train plodded along with its guard, albeit reduced in manpower.

"You never said what you would eat?" Cricket reminded the dryad.

Jeshu laughed then looked up at the ceiling as he pondered. "I am quite fond of the mushrooms here. They are so flavorful if prepared correctly."

"You eat mushrooms?"

"Of course, why?"

"I don't know," Cricket shrugged. "I thought druids might not eat plants."

"I'm a vegetarian," Jeshu said. "It's all I eat."

"I thought you might just eat meat in order to protect plants. You know, like a... carnitarian?"

Jeshu shook his head and two leaves fell to the cavern floor. "Meat doesn't have the nutrients I need. Really, I need the sun too. Not sure I can really thrive down here."

Oydd fell back by Jeshu and Cricket, leaving Kaser up front with Agena and the azaeri. When he felt there was enough sound to cover his voice he whispered, "This was a setup, clearly. But I've been thinking. The whole mission was designed to fail. Whatever the gnolls thought they were after was actually a mimic to bait them. We took back tunnels and Licephus' presence wasn't known."

"What's your point?" Cricket asked.

"My point is that Damien knew. We were meant to be ambushed."

"Licephus knew as well," Jeshu added. "But you don't like being bait."

Oydd shook his head. "But Licephus fought with us. We don't know Damien's intentions. Did he mean for Licephus to die, or to help draw out rebel dhampiri for Licephus to kill?"

"What does it matter?" Cricket asked, genuinely curious.

"If Damien is a traitor, then we could kill him."

"To what end?" Jeshu asked hollowly. "To be replaced by someone worse?"

"To be replaced by us," Oydd hissed.

They continued in silence for a minute.

Finally, Oydd spoke again, in softer tones. "I have been trained to take Damien's place if anything... unfortunate happens to him. Only I know how to run all the affairs of the Warrens. In fact, Damien has grown lazy. I'm practically running things now."

"The ratlings wouldn't accept you," Cricket pointed out. "You'd have a mutiny on your hands."

"They wouldn't accept me," Oydd replied, "but they would accept you."

Cricket considered this point.

"I would be the Left Hand of the Warrens, and you would be the Right as it were. Really, you would be the face to make sure the others fall in line."

Jeshu frowned. "How much control would you really have?"

"Enough..." the rudra responded. "I am really only worried about Agena. I cannot tell where his loyalties lie. Anyway, for now it is just a thought. I know neither of you like taking orders if it... goes against your values?"

The rudra wandered back toward the front of the caravan, leaving Cricket to consider the proposition.