Chapter 7: Mos Espa

The city center Mos Espa was inside a big ass crater, where it was harder for the suns to reach and the temperature wasn’t quite as extreme. There were lots of pretty huge buildings and honestly, it’s amazing to me how the whole damn planet could only have a million people living on it. But then again, just because there were only a million people who ‘lived here’, there were likely tens of millions that were just passing through.

The tourist industry was thriving for sure. Lots of criminal syndicates, slave traders, regular traders, gamblers and sex traffickers everywhere. A lot of people bet on ‘Pod Racing’, but realistically speaking, the majority of gambling took place in the massive luxurious casinos in the crater.

I didn’t go down there though. My prey was up here somewhere. The tan and simple-looking buildings were pretty sparse, but there were still plenty of people walking around. Some were riding or pulling bipedal lizards or the furry Banthas. Others were driving on hover bikes, trucks, almost every vehicle in Star Wars seemed to hover or have a bunch of legs.

“I was a little worried we might stand out, but I guess I was thinking too much.” I was about two meters tall, but there were plenty of random Species that were taller than me.

“Euuuueeeeeiiieieieiuuue~!” Like the Wookiee that was holding a blaster and extorting protection money from the red-skinned Togrutan man who was selling… Junk. Everyone around here was selling Junk. Random pieces of machinery, metals, plastics, various tools and equipment that may or may not work. It’s a mystery.

“Awwaiiinga!” A couple of tiny Jawas were arguing with a Zabrak woman near another stall. There were huge piles of metal garbage piled up in fenced off areas behind small buildings. Along with just rows and rows of speeder bikes and other random vehicles that had varying degrees of damage.

“So much Essence.” Izsha was salivating as she looked at the various new and interesting Species that we hadn’t ‘sampled’ yet.

“Don’t worry. There’s no rush.” I watched a pair of cute yellow Twi’lek girls walking around in generic ‘Slave Girl’ outfits that have been around since the Old Republic. One of them giggled and rushed up to hug a random human guy, wrapping her lekku around his back as she started making out with him. For a moment I thought they might know each other, but then I noticed the other one casually swiping something off his waist and slapping him on the ass. The two girls laughed and ran away, the dangly brown cloths lifted up, exciting some of the men and women who were watching.

“Master, do you want me to capture those breeding slaves for you?” Izsha’s telepathic voice brought me back to reality.

“Nah, I’m good.” I sighed dramatically and shook my head, “If I wanted a random Twi’lek girl, I could just make one myself.”

It wasn’t a particularly difficult gene sequence to get my hands on, even back on Zonama Sekot. I have samples from a dozen different individuals already. Obviously that’s nothing in the grand scheme of things. There are a bunch of different types of Twi’lek, with different coloring and features. For reference, I have tens of thousands of gene samples from Ferroans, Langhesi and various creatures that are native to my homeworld. Plants, animals, fungi, bacteria, viruses, everything and anything. So a handful or a couple dozen samples isn’t enough to do any serious research. However, if I have someone’s genes, it’s easy enough to clone that specific person without much trouble.

“If I was hornier, I’d probably be an absolute menace, huh?” I chuckled and continued walking down the dusty road.

“Maaaaaaoooooouuu~!” Midnight finally couldn’t take the heat anymore it seems. I looked under the floating Drone and saw the kitty hiding in her shade, but I didn’t design him to have super-feline stamina. Actually, he was probably just really thirsty. Usually drank a lot of water all day, everyday. But we’ve been walking around for an hour now and he hasn’t had a lick.

“Hey, you’re selling water, right?” I walked over to a random vendor, a Bith girl. Big bulging tan head, giant glassy black eyes, bunch of skin flaps along the middle of the face instead of a nose… Mouth kinda looks like an asshole.

She held up three fingers and placed a metal canister on the counter, “If you want more, it’ll cost you twice as much.”

“That seems kinda weird, but whatever.” I put down the big green suitcase with a loud ‘thump’ and kicked up a bunch of dust. Then I placed the silvery case on the counter of her stand and opened it up, the golden coins drew a lot of attention, obviously. She looked at me like I was an idiot when I handed over three Peggats, “I know you meant Wuipiupi. Give me a keg.”

“Keg’ll cost ya more.” She reached a hand into the case and tried to take a whole damn handful, but her body froze as I tapped my right index fingertip in the middle of her massive forehead.

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“It’s a shame that such pretty eyes don’t seem to be able to see very well.” I pulled my finger back and drew a line of crimson blood from her forehead. I turned my finger upwards and all the blood gathered into a swirling orb, “Probably too much sunlight. Maybe you should try wearing sunglasses?”

“I’m a Moisture Trader working for Gardulla the Hutt!” She broke free of the ‘stunlock’ and shouted at me, taking the handful of coins and pushing over two small canisters of water. “Don’t think you can just threaten anyone and get away with it!”

“Huh?” I looked over and pointed at the Wookiee that was pointing a blaster at the Togrutan man, “What about that guy?”

“He works for Gardulla!” She looked at my case and reached out to take another handful, but then her body froze again.

“Maaaou~!” Midnight cried again, walking out of Izsha’s shadow and rubbing up against the back of my leg.

“It’s kinda amazing how you’ve managed to survive this long.” I flicked the drop of blood and it shot back inside of her forehead.

“Aaaaaaaaaah~!” She screamed and clawed at her own head while falling backwards, knocking over boxes of metal canisters.

*Pop!* Then her head burst open and a huge pink brain floated over to my finger, floating there where the blood had been before. It was pretty damn big.

“Shame that having a big brain doesn’t mean you’re smart.” I shook my head and looked over at the Wookiee, “Pull the trigger.”

His hands holding the gun shook as I heard people quickly scrambling to get away from the area before the shooting started. Well, some of them. Others just pulled out guns of their own. Either pointing them at me or taking cover.

“Aww, so boring.” I sighed dramatically when the Wookiee pussied out, “Whatever. I promised Jango I wouldn’t fuck shit up until after he left.”

I walked around behind the stall and grabbed the girl’s brown robe and lifted her up off the dirt. The blood, flesh and bone twisted around the floating brain, warping until they at least looked about the same on the outside as before.

“So wasteful.” Izsha grumbled as she took back all the Peggats with her pincers and placed them back inside the case. Midnight was already lapping up some water that sprayed from a busted canister. He didn’t care about the Bith blood or sand. He’s a cat.

“Eueueueueueah!” The Wookiee made Wookiee noises and went back to harassing the Togruta guy who seemed more afraid of me than the dude extorting him. There were also a lot of onlookers that seemed horrified. Not to mention the dumbass that had her brain removed for a few seconds.

“Monster!” Was the only thing she said before trying to escape, but she tripped on a canister and busted her skull open…

“Okay, don’t do that again.” I put her big-ass head back together and complained, “I’m gonna go now, okay. If you break again, I’m not gonna fix you a third time.”

“Why are you doing this to me?!” She screamed hysterically and started crying. Well, she didn’t have tears or snot, but she maid whiny noises and looked very distraught.

“You ripped me off. I ripped your brain out. Seems totally fair to me.” I patted her on the head and she wailed even louder, “Okay, so I’m gonna go… Uh, good luck in therapy, I guess?”

I’m sure they probably have therapists on Tatooine, maybe? Whatever, not my problem anymore.

We kept walking until we came to a bigger market area. It was pretty crowded and hectic, with lots of humans or humanoids wearing protective hooded robes. But from time to time, there were also women or even men walking around half-naked. Not sure if they’re just not bothered by the heat or if they’re really trying to ‘sell their wares’. Then again, Twi’leks are from a desert world, so they’re able to handle pretty intense heat and sunlight compared to humans and a lot of other Species.

“Master.” Izsha pushed my arm and pointed towards a certain market stall, “Can we purchase biomass?”

There were a bunch of bird-like creatures that had already had their feathers removed and were hanging upside down. The person operating the stand was cooking kebabs on a grill. She looked like a Quarrian. No wait, that’s from Mass Effect, I mean a Quarren. Squid-headed motherfuckers. She had her tentacles wrapped around two canisters of water and took sips from time to time. Honestly, an aquatic race trying to survive on Tatooine is wild. I have no idea how they break even in terms of costs. Water is just too damn expensive here.

“That line is kinda crazy though.” I looked at the dozen or so people who were waiting and looked around at the other food stalls that weren’t as busy.

“Hey, get back here!” A three-eyed goat-headed guy, umm, a Gran, shouted as he pushed Izsha aside!

“Watch where you’re going, asshole!” I shouted at him, but he probably didn’t even hear anything over the noise of the market. Then I saw a stall collapse and an angry Ithorian fighting with the Gran over it. Karma, probably.

“So anyway, why don’t we find an actual restaurant? I don’t think I’ve ever eaten in a restaurant since I was born.” I’m not even kidding. They just didn’t exist in the conventional sense on Zonama Sekot. There were markets in the village where I grew up, but that was about it. At most, neighbors would invite each other over for meals or people would eat with their families. My parents did that kinda stuff when I was a kid, but as I grew up, Dad was busy and I was even busier.

“Maaaouu~!” Midnight suddenly screamed and I saw a little kid carrying him away. Some little green Rodian brat.

“Master, the cat is being abducted.” Izsha stated the obvious but didn’t try to stop it from happening.

“I know you think Midnight is a weakness that we should get rid of, but he’s practically your older brother.” I thought back to my own older brothers in this life and smiled wryly. I mean, I wouldn’t let them die or get kidnapped, but we also aren’t that close. Same with my parents from this life.

“You programmed me to avoid harming children.” She snapped her pincers a few times really loudly and said, “Hands would be more useful.”

“Don’t worry. Those claws are only temporary. You won’t be a Drone for much longer.” I looked over to where the boy was taking the cat and smiled wryly, “First we find Midnight, then we eat at a restaurant, and if we can’t find the Chosen One by the end of the day… Well, he might not even be in the city at the moment.”

Although he didn’t leave Tatooine in Canon or Legends until he was 9, he did have a lot of random short stories where he would have to go to Mos Eisley or maybe he could be out pod racing? Who knows?

It should be pretty easy to find Watto’s Junk Shop though. Just need to ask around. I’m sure that somebody around here will know something. Unless I’m on the wrong side of the outskirts of the city… After all, it’s a massive crater.

“There’s gotta be some kinda map, right?” I don’t believe there aren’t any maps. I just gotta figure out where to find one. What kinda store would sell holomaps?

“Master, I see the Rodian child.” Izsha floated high above the crowd and I followed along on foot. Nobody seemed particularly concerned or impressed though. There were plenty of hover vehicles floating around above the market as well.

“Just keep an eye on them. I wanna see where he brings Midnight.” If he was stealing my cat for some gangster, then that’d be a lot more fun and enjoyable than just snatching my cat back from a random child.