The stupid knot I was trying to tie came out wrong for the twentieth time and I felt like throwing it across the room. I hated wearing ties. What was the point of tying a noose around your neck? Why was it considered fashionable and classy? It had never made any sense to me. I restarted the YouTube tutorial that I was following and tried it again.
It had been an entire week since Nonno died and I was getting ready for the funeral. I didn’t love the idea of wearing a stuffy suit, but I was doing it out of respect for him. All of our family and family friends would be at the funeral and I couldn’t go there looking like a bum. After a couple more minutes of fumbling with the tie, I finally achieved victory.
“Oh my god, I’ve done it!” I said.
An extremely handsome lady killer in a sharp black suit with a perfectly tied tie grinned back at me in the mirror. Instead of my usual messy shoulder-length hair, I’d gotten a fresh haircut with a fade on the side. The hair on top was slicked back and I looked good. I mean, I always looked good but now I looked DAMN good. My eyes happened to notice the ring in my right hand and my smile evaporated.
I’d managed to go a whole ten minutes without thinking about the system and the quest it had given me. That was a new record. I closed my laptop and grabbed my phone before heading downstairs. I had no intention of completing the quest, so there was no point in giving it any more thought.
The system might have given me the quest of becoming a criminal, but that didn’t mean I had to go along with it. I wasn’t going to let some sketchy ring tell me how to live my life. Just because I was stuck with the ring didn’t mean I needed to use it. I planned on just ignoring the stupid blue boxes and quests forever and continuing to live life on my terms. Whatever the system was up to, I wanted no part of it.
Unfortunately, I was having trouble with figuring out what my next move would be. I’d sent applications to every store and business I could think of. I must have sent out over one hundred applications in the two weeks since I got kicked out of school. My options were limited since I only had a high school diploma, but I still applied to as many jobs as I could. I applied for jobs as a cashier, call center representative, bank teller, waiter, restaurant dishwasher, bartender, and any other low-experience roles I could find on Indeed, LinkedIn, and Craigslist.
Half of the jobs I applied to sent me automated rejection emails a day or two later. I called a few of the jobs a day or two after applying to try and set up interviews but none of the people I spoke to were open to that. I was still waiting to hear back from the rest of the jobs I’d applied to, but I wasn’t getting my hopes up. I’d even tried applying to a couple of places in person like it was 1995 or something, but the employees working there just looked at me like I was crazy and told me to apply online.
My resume was admittedly kind of dog shit. I wasn’t able to land any internships or part-time jobs while I was in college and then I ended up getting sucked into the paper writing operation. It was a shame that I couldn’t put that on my resume. Instead, I had to make do with a mostly fabricated resume that was held together with Chat-GPT and duct tape. The entire process of hunting for a job was so frustrating that it almost made me want to give in to the system and do the quest. Almost.
The job search would have to wait for later though, because it was time to leave for the funeral. Mom drove Sofia to the church in her car and I drove there alone in my Honda Civic. I’d been to enough family gatherings to know that taking a separate car was the right move. It was great to be able to sneak out and go home if it started to drag on for too long.
Traffic was surprisingly light for once and I managed to get to the church quickly. The service was held at The Cathedral of St. Mary. St. Mary’s was a huge church with gorgeous architecture and beautiful stained glass windows. It was the type of building that looked more like it belonged in some European country than in southern Florida. I have to tip my hat to whoever designed the place because they did a fantastic job.
Cars of funeral-goers lined the entire block as people started pouring into the church for the service. There were so many people heading to the funeral that it almost felt like the President had died. As I looked around, I noticed something strange. Some of the people heading into the church had little boxes floating above their heads. But other people didn’t have the boxes. For example, I noticed a bald muscular guy who was at least 6’4 walking into the church.
Giovanni Zuccaro
Captain of the Caruso Family
Not far behind the Italian knockoff of The Rock was a man in his seventies or early eighties who was in a motorized wheelchair. He smiled as his granddaughter showed him her teddy bear.
Elio Barone
Don of the Barone Family
It didn’t take long to figure out what was happening. The system was giving me the names and job titles of people who were connected to the “family business”. Maybe this was its way of letting me know about people who could potentially help me pass the quest it had given me. I tried my best to pretend I didn’t see the name cards. There was still time before the service started so I pulled out my phone and saw that I had a couple of new emails. More job rejections. Great.
“Hey! How’s my favorite nephew doing?” I heard someone behind me say.
I whipped around and smiled. “Hi, Uncle Luca. I’m good, how are you?”
Luca Moretti Don of the Moretti Family
Uncle Luca was the oldest of all my dad’s siblings. Nonno was the Don of the crew on paper, but he’d been mostly retired for years. Uncle Luca was the one who was running the day-to-day operations of the organization. The system recognized him as the Don, so it looked like he'd been officially promoted since Nonno's passing. Even though I had my reservations about his business, I’d always thought Uncle Luca was one of the coolest guys I’d ever met. He was a lively guy who could make anyone laugh. And whenever things got serious, you knew that you could rely on him.
“I’m doin’ alright. Getting by. You know how it is,” he said.
I embraced him in a hug before giving one to my Aunt Livia.
“You look like you’ve grown three inches since I last saw you, Nico. You’re the spitting image of your father these days,” said Aunt Livia.
“Thanks,” I said. I never knew how to react when people brought him up.
“I heard about the trouble you got into at school,” Uncle Luca said. “Are you doin’ alright?”
“Yeah, I’m fine. I’ve been applying to jobs and I’m sure things will work out soon.”
“That’s good. I’ll listen out and let you know if I hear about any jobs for you. Never forget, I’ve always got your back,” He winked.
This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road. If you spot it on Amazon, please report it.
“Thanks, I appreciate that,” I smiled.
I noticed a few people standing across the street and taking pictures as everyone walked in. My uncle noticed too and his mood soured a bit. I assumed that they were probably cops or federal agents trying to build cases against someone. They could’ve tried a little harder to be stealthy though.
“I’ll catch you later, Nico,” He said. He made sure to flip off the cops before heading inside the church.
The interactions I had with the rest of my family weren’t as pleasant as that one. Aunts, Uncles, and cousins that I hadn’t seen in ages all wanted to catch up with me, but it was clear that they’d heard about me getting kicked out of college and just wanted to pry me for details. It pissed me off how they all acted oblivious about whether or not I was still in school and danced around the situation. The fake concern felt so condescending to me.
Every time one of them asked me what my plans were I wanted to die. It was like the world’s most uninteresting nightmare stuck on a loop. I just had to smile and keep answering the same nosy questions over and over again. After a certain point, I started making up new stories for each person who asked me why I wasn’t in school anymore just to mess with them. My favorite one was when I told my Aunt Amara that I left college to pursue my dream of becoming a professional bluegrass musician.
“Bluegrass is making a big comeback this year,” I said. “Rap is out and bluegrass is in. All the cool kids these days are grassheads. I’m going to be bigger than Drake!”
“That’s… great. It’s nice to follow your dreams,” She smiled awkwardly as she walked away.
Eventually, the service started and I thanked the big guy upstairs for sparing me from more uncomfortable conversations. But apparently, he had a sense of humor because he brought me out of one nightmare and placed me right into a new one. Mass dragged on for what felt like centuries. The priest had the most monotone voice I’d ever heard in my entire life. Time ground to a complete halt as this boring man droned on and on. It took all of my willpower not to fall asleep. The dirty looks and elbow jabs in the ribs that I got from Mom served as a great source of motivation to stay conscious. I was able to take comfort in the fact that I wasn’t the only person in the audience struggling not to nod off.
Finally, we got to the part of the service where people got up to speak about my Nonno and the memories they had of him. It was much easier to stay engaged during this part. Everyone who spoke had nothing but nice things to say about the man.
My favorite part was when one of Nonno’s old army buddies went up to speak. He was wearing his old uniform and proudly showed off all the medals he had earned. This guy went off for twenty minutes straight about fighting “Nazi scum” and “The goddamn Charlies” with Nonno, making it hard to tell which war they even served in. Eventually one of his family members had to go up and force him to leave the stage.
“How old was Nonno, anyway?” I whispered to Mom. “The program doesn’t have his age on it anywhere.”
“I’m not sure. I think I heard that he put in his will that he didn’t want people to know his birth date at the funeral,” She whispered back.
Weird. I knew that some people felt uncomfortable about sharing their age with others, but why would you still be worried about that when you were dead? It shouldn’t matter anymore at that point. I wondered if his age would be written on his tombstone.
Most of the stories people told weren’t as wild as the ones from that veteran. As I listened to people share their experiences with Nonno, I felt like I was beginning to see him in a new light. There were so many things about him that I’d never known before. A woman talked about how he donated food to a local homeless shelter every week. An elderly man told the story of how Nonno gave him the money to pay for his wife’s surgery and never asked him to pay the money back. Something clicked inside of me after hearing all those speeches.
So many people’s lives were touched because they knew Nonno. I loved him but knowing that he was a gangster had made me keep him at a distance. He must have done a lot of bad things to earn the position that he held, but at the same time, it was clear that he’d also done a lot of good. And when all was said and done, he had a room full of people who were willing to mourn his passing. He might not have been on the right side of the law, but I felt like he’d lived a good life.
I glanced down at the ring. Out of everyone in our family, he’d left it for me. There were so many other people that he could have passed it on to but for some reason, he’d felt like I was the one who needed it. And from the way he directed our last conversation, it was obvious that he knew about my situation at school. He’d given me the ring because he saw something in me.
It was time to quit kidding myself. I knew exactly what I was doing when I started helping my classmates cheat and I didn’t care. The money, the status among my peers, and the rush I got from not getting caught had made it all worthwhile. Running that operation was the most fun part of my college experience. The only reason I went away to school in the first place was to make my mom happy. Crime ran through my blood, and I was tired of fighting it. My grandfather was a criminal, but he was also a good man. And I was ready to follow in his footsteps.
After that, everyone got a chance to look at the open casket and say their final goodbyes. I couldn’t help smiling a little when I saw so many old-school macho dudes weeping over their dead boss. It was very sweet.
Eventually, I got to the front of the line and peered into the coffin. Nonno looked peaceful lying there in his gray three-piece suit. There was still a light smile on his lips. Tears streamed down my face.
“I know why you gave me this now,” I whispered, rubbing the ring. “And I promise that I’ll make you proud.”
I lingered by the casket for a few more moments before I wiped my eyes and walked away. There was something important that I needed to do and I knew just the person to help me do it. I spotted my target near the back of the church and made a beeline toward him.
Uncle Luca was laughing it up with some friends when I tapped him on the shoulder. “Hi, sorry to interrupt but can I talk to you for a second?”
“Sure, no problem,” he said. “Wait for me out front. I’ll be with you in a minute.”
I headed outside the church and pulled out my phone while I waited. Another rejection email came in. I deleted it and smiled.
Uncle Luca walked over to me with a lit cigarette in his hand.“Alright, kid. What’s on your mind?”
“You said earlier that if I needed anything I could come to you,” I started.
“Of course, you can. We’re family. So what’s up? What do you need help with?”
I took a deep breath and held his gaze. “I want to come and work for you.”
“At the real estate company? Sure, we can probably find some type of entry-level job for you.”
“That’s not what I mean,” I said. “I want to work for you in the other business.”
“I don’t know nothin’ about another business,” He said, looking around. “Somebody must’ve given you some bad information.”
I groaned. “Don’t treat me like an idiot. I’ve known about it for ages. I’ve got eyes. I see things. Nonno and I even talked about it the last time that I saw him.”
Uncle Luca gave me a side eye when he heard that. “Yeah? What exactly did the two of you talk about?”
I tried to think of a way of summing up the conversation without mentioning the system. “He basically asked me if I was interested in being a part of the business. Then he gave me his ring as a symbol of his blessing.” That was essentially the truth.
He took a long drag on his cigarette before he spoke again. “Do you know what you’re asking me? This lifestyle is serious. People can wind up in prison or seriously hurt or worse.”
“Yeah, I know,” I said.
“You know? What do you know?” He snapped. “This ain’t a movie, Nico. This is real life! And in real life, getting involved in this can have dangerous consequences. I don’t think you’re built for it.”
“You’re a smart kid,” He continued. “The college thing might not have worked out, but keep your head up. I’m sure you’ll find something else soon.”
“I’ve been thinking about my situation nonstop and I don’t see another path for me,” I said. “All my friends are going to be graduating soon and starting nice careers, but what about me? If I don’t do this, the best-case scenario is that I become a plumber.”
I shook my head. “Fuck that. I want more. I’ve already made up my mind. Just give me a chance to prove to you that I can do this.”
Uncle Luca took another puff of his cigarette. “Your Ma would kill me if she knew I got you mixed up in this.”
“I’m an adult and it’s my decision. If she has a problem with it then she’ll have to blame me, not you,” I said.
Uncle Luca was silent for a long time after that. Finally, he threw his cigarette on the ground and stepped on it.
“Alright, Nico. I’ll give you a chance,” He frowned. “But don’t say I didn’t warn you.”