As a representative of the Colony, the Eldest became an invaluable asset over time. With their unique ability to speak to anyone and hold the family’s interest at the forefront of their mind, the Eldest was a fearsome negotiator.

In many ways, they became the weapon of choice for the Colony in our diplomatic efforts. A stable presence, who never lost sight of the main goal, and who could overwhelm others with the sheer force of their monstrous presence.

Of course, as time passed, it became almost impossible for them to rise high enough in the Dungeon to speak with other representatives, but the Eldest was always willing to serve the family, despite the pain.

That is why we repay them in kind. Regardless of the pain.

- From the private notes of Diplomant.

[Anthony?]

[Hey there, Enid. I thought you were going for a nap?]

The old woman huffs, her hands on her hips as she glares up at me.

[Just because you tell me to go and sleep, doesn’t mean I will. Do you seriously think you’re the boss of me?]

[I wouldn’t dare. However, it does sound like you might be in need of a full medical….]

She draws back in horror, eyes darting to the dark corners of my warehouse.

[You wouldn’t!]

[Is it really that bad?] I ask, amused. She’s been abducted by the healers a few times. It’s important that we make sure she’s getting the best possible care; after all that she’s done for us, it’s the least we can do.

[I dislike being treated like an invalid,] she shudders. [Those healers wouldn’t let me walk unaided until I started hitting them with a stick. They didn’t mind that I hit them, but they felt it demonstrated I was stable enough to move around on my own.]

The picture of a fed up Enid swinging a walking stick at the healers is so out of character I can’t help but laugh.

[That really happened? I’m not sure I believe it.]

[Oh, it happened. I’m old, Anthony, not dead.]

[That’s the entire point, old woman. We want to keep you old and not dead.]

[I’ve had a good life. I accomplished more than I ever really expected to. I’m happy to go when my time is up.]

This story originates from Royal Road. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there.

[Bah. I refuse to believe you aren’t enjoying this trade mission. All this travel? Admit it, you’re having a great time.]

[I am,] she smiled, [it’s been very enjoyable.]

[May as well stick around, then. More enjoyable things are bound to happen.]

[Stop pestering me,] she scowls, but I can tell she doesn’t really mean it. [I came over here to discuss a serious matter, not to be coddled by you ants.]

[Oh? Serious matters, eh? You know I like to keep those as far from me as possible. I’m allergic.]

[Very funny. Eran sent me. Apparently, there are some officials from the city who wanted to come and meet you ahead of the market opening tomorrow. It’s not really possible for her to deny them, given where we are. Is that alright with you?]

[Sounds like it has to be, doesn’t it?] I sigh, pushing myself up. [Just how important are these people? Is it the head of the fire brigade? Leader of the local ‘Friends of the Grape’ wine society? Or… the leader of the army, or something? I need to gauge my level of flippance.]

[I’m not exactly sure,] she replies, looking a little troubled, [and I don’t think the Eran knows either. I would take them seriously and be on your best manners, regardless.]

[Fine. Better roll out the red carpet, then.]

By the time our guests arrive, I’ve enlisted the help of Cobalt to get things looking presentable. A nice table is put in place, chairs, all that stuff. The bakers get to work and we have a fine selection of cakes and, of course, the Colony’s finest tea steaming in a self-heating pot.

Naturally, I get my own cup and slice, extra size for my tier seven frame. The tea is delicious, I have to say. I wasn’t really partial to tea as a human, unless boiling leaves and weeds counts as tea? I think they have to be specific leaves.

For whatever reason, I decide to get Jern and Alis to stick around on either side of me, wearing something semi-official looking. They’re ‘guardians of the sanctum’ or whatever, so they may as well be around. I also take the unusual step of demanding that Protectant and her twenty be visible for the meeting. If someone who shows up can detect them, then it’s going to be a bad look for us having them hovering around all suspicious-like.

Two hours later, as evening is beginning to descend, our guests arrive.

Naturally, they aren’t unaccompanied, and a fairly impressive gathering of soldiers arrive, each wearing ornate armour that seems to gleam with an internal light. Combined with the guards they already have around me, this is starting to feel excessive.

There’s an official group surrounded by all this hubbub, but from them, a single mage steps forward, a man in official-looking robes, who reaches out to me with a well-crafted mind bridge.

Seriously, after all this time, I know an expert at work when I see one. This bridge is flawless, and whipped together with such speed. Clearly not a usual mage.

[Greetings. I am to be the official go-between for this meeting. I trust that is satisfactory?]

[Sure, sure,] I wave him forward with an antenna. [Nice to meet you. I’m Anthony. Can I interest you in some tea? Or cake? It’s good stuff.]

[Anthony, is it? An interesting name for a monster to take.]

[Really?] I ask, confused. [We’ve got all sorts of names here in the Colony. There’s one who called themselves Brilliant, if you can believe it.]

[That does seem rather bold,] the mage agrees. [I would love to accept your offer of refreshments, but first they must be checked, for safety. I’m sure you understand.]

Seriously? These people are being a little too careful, aren’t they? Who would seriously attempt to poison some random officials in the middle of their city while surrounded by soldiers?! Nevertheless, I agree, because I don’t have any choice, and because I don’t really care.

Who the heck are these people and why do they want to talk to me?