Alright, alright. It seems you can’t follow simple instructions. It is a surprise that you can operate any sort of electronic, but I digress. You won’t leave, so I should somewhat explain what this glimpse into a broken mind is. I am not a writer, but that won’t stop me. Samuel de Camplain founded Quebec because of the amount of hats I’m throwing into so many rings. The Pure Food and Drug Act was passed because of how many of my fingers they found in pies.

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  But despite this, I am not a renaissance man. At most, I’m a Neolithic monkey. I have at least two stone ages’ worth of information in my glass marble-like brain, in both size and smoothness.

  I produce a shocking amount of bad work, so sometimes I make a suitable pseudonym to publish the work under for others to laugh at. I can’t recommend reading it, but you are the type to sit on a bench because a sign says “wet paint,” so go ahead. You won’t have fun, but I’ll tell you to anyway.