It was no longer shocking to feel my legs throbbing like they were filled with quivering lava plumes. It wasn’t shocking to hear everyone in the cabin gabbing away so vigorously that I’d sworn I could hear them long before I hit the front door. It wasn’t surprising at all…that or I was too conked out for it to register. Conked out and zonked out from the long, successful journey.
What did shock me was turning the corner to see a new picture on the wall.
“Mraow!”
It was such a strange surprise that me reeling at the sight almost knocked me into Reed’s leg. She’d just let me into the cabin, letting me take in the festive smells of dinner, the sounds of community…and this painting, which she would have to answer for.
What even…why?
I felt so conflicted as I stared up at it. The painting, framed in shining cherry wood, had been hung precisely over the gash that Logy had torn in the wall that terrible time she fought me in the night. It had been my fault in a way, and now…in a sense…I was covering it up.
Yep, it was a picture of me. Me as Reed had first seen me, with yellow-orange tabby stripes. Sitting upright, amber eyes straight forward…hold on, I had amber eyes?
I was baffled. I was honored! I was embarrassed. Was a picture of me just going to hang out here for, like, forever? Watching everyone—judging?!
Alright, fine. I couldn’t deny it was kind of great, and even hilarious. It reflected a way more serious and royal image of me than maybe I deserved. Then again, I deserved whatever Reed saw fit to bequeath upon me. It was her cabin, after all, and if she saw no shame in covering up “my” mistake with an oddly grandiose picture of me, so be it.
…And she cared enough about me to make such a detailed painting. Were my height and body shape accurate, were the stripes exact? I couldn’t tell, but…that was the color of my fur.
From memory.
All those thoughts had gone through me in the span of about five seconds. Reed hesitantly asked, “Are you alright? Was this a bit much? …I can take it down…”
No, I thought, and strongly. Rubbing against her leg, I tried to reassure her. She kneeled and ran a hand along my back, which was a good first step.
Then I used words. “ITS GREAT,” I said. “IT IS MUCH, BUT IM MUCH”
Reed chuckled. “Oh! Uh…I hope that’s a good thing.”
Frankly I didn’t know what that thing I just said meant either! Yet it sounded true.
We all wandered back to the table—the table that was being sternly watched by my double.
The fact that everyone had already met up by the time I arrived meant that in one way, I ‘d failed at my goal. Ideally, I’d have been back before Heidschi even arrived! But my sheer mapmaking progress overcame that regret.
Quest: Explore the Vencian Wood Progress: 77% (23/30)
Besides, it was enough to see them all looking pretty content! There were even a few bowls of greens edged with the kinds of decorations I’d seen on Heidschi’s teapot. They’d gone above and beyond with gifts, and I’d expected nothing less.
“…you do have to compromise, sometimes for cost, sometimes for comfort,” Heidschi was saying as Reed helped me find a seat. The glasses cantrip sat idle by their plate.
Chora took a bite of dandelion leaves. “That’s true with traditional uniforms too,” she said. “But then…have you ever infused an outfit with magic? Sometimes it turns out that the old stuff was less comfortable because it had to be.”
“Ha! I wish I could. Without my bard knowledge, I’m pretty talentless, as far as magic goes.”
“Aww,” Bayce said, “but we all have a little magical aptitude! Practice makes perfect!”
“But there’s so much else I want to practice…that I’m much better at.”
As Heidschi started going over the responsibilities of shepherds, I looked around. Behind Heidschi, in front of Heidschi, under the table at everyone’s legs including Heidschi’s. But there were no sheep! And nobody else was concerned about this!
Were they just at some sheep garage for sheep storage? Was there a sheep hotel or day spa? Clearly nobody was going to tell me unless I made like Bayce and thrust an arbitrary question into an unrelated conversation. I found a not-too-terrible place to insert said question and went ahead.
“WHERE ARE THE SHEEP?!?!?!?!”
Everyone stared for a moment.
“That’s quite a lot of punctuation,” Bayce remarked.
Taken from Royal Road, this narrative should be reported if found on Amazon.
“Um…” Heidschi wiped their glasses and slid them back on. “What happened?”
Actually, that was another thing that confused me. I spelled out a new question. “WHY DO U ONLY WEAR THOSE SOMETIMES?”
Now Chora and Bayce but especially Reed looked uneasy. Reed blurted, “Taipha isn’t from around here! She may be impolite on accident.”
“It’s fine, thank you. I just didn’t grow up seeing. Sometimes it’s more relaxing to leave them off.”
At first that answer seemed bizarre to me. I would not feel at all relieved to not know where the food on my plate was without touching it. But given the amount of times I’d wanted to block out flying boxes or shut out the sound of the world…yeah, actually.
A good bit of the expressions on my friends’ faces came through in their voices anyway, so I guessed Heidschi wasn’t even missing much.
“GOT IT. SORRY,” I said. “I WAS ALSO CONFUSED ABOUT SHEEP”
“Oh.” Heidschi dug through the bag at their hip to pull out, uh…a hand-sized circular capsule.
Reed tensed, but Bayce lit up. “I’ve been so curious about those!”
The capsule had two halves, one cream and the bottom one white, and could pop open if Heidschi’s thumb decided to tap the S in the middle. This was…oh no…
“I-I don’t really—”
“Yes! Yes! That’s so amazing!” Bayce cried. “Do you, like, throw it at rabid animals and bonk them on the head, and then all the sheep come flooding out?!”
Chora looked her up and down, but said nothing. There was food in her mouth anyway.
Heidschi sighed a little. “Well, to anyone who may be uninitiated, this is my ‘sheep ball.’ It holds sheep. And they, um…” The shepherd bit their lip. “They love it there. They really, extremely love it.”
“It’s like opioids in ball form.”
“You may be joking,” Heidschi said, “but it’s true. They are pretty much addicted.” They sighed again, more dramatically. “I should’ve never gotten this thing, but…it’s much cheaper than a day spa.”
“And now they won’t let you get rid of it,” Chora figured.
“No.”
“But it does get them battle-ready,” Bayce said.
“Yes, sometimes, because if you let them stay inside for long enough before you release them, they’re so angry to be back in the real world.”
Wow! D’urr, how could I move us away from the ethics of Sheepmon…
Reed seemed about to say something, but Heidschi stopped them with placating hands. “Now, I can assure you I rotate them out, I have them eat grass, I sun them—”
“OK WHENS DESSERT?”
I had eaten every last scrap of fish in the buffet (which might have been every last scrap of fish in the house, given how long ago I’d gone fishing with Bayce). While I highly doubted I’d want dessert, that didn’t mean it couldn’t make a great transition!
Soon Bayce proudly waitressed in four platters full of desserts she’d made with Reed two days ago. They looked as fresh as ever, their frosting sparkling like Bayce’s teeth.
Chora bit into one of the pastries, apparently for the first time. “It’s good,” she said.
I involuntarily stared. She didn’t give compliments so easily. Was this her making a strong effort? Handing Bayce the olive branch?
Who could say? I couldn’t even tell whether Bayce accepted it or not. She simply smiled back the way she was smiling at everyone and sat back down.
“Oh my,” Heidschi said. The table was flat-out overwhelmed by new dishes and old. She added in a voice that was a tad sulky, “Looks like there’s not enough room for mine…”
Woah! Heidschi brought more stuff?! I had to make this happen! I Morphed in a flash—
Just as Reed bolted upright and snapped up some empty plates. Darnit. The Morph clouds blew over everyone and dissipated. Fortunately, they hadn’t made Reed drop anything.
“…uh, Taipha, you can take these to the kitchen,” Reed said. Clearly she was compromising to make me feel better, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t accept the offer and feel a little grateful. “Thanks,” she added.
With arms full and far less clumsy than before, I trucked it over to the kitchen. Chores, chores, wonderful cho—wait!
I hadn’t learned about anything…you know…plot-relevant! Weren’t Chora and I, and maybe other people, heading out tomorrow? Had they discussed that without me, or what? Was the whole thing called off? No way, right?
Luckily, when I got back to the table, everyone was discussing the gravity of our uncertain futures. Just kidding! They were talking about the pumpkin pie Heidschi had just unveiled.
Reed marveled! Chora looked.
Bayce’s expression was profound, but unreadable. “I have no particular opinion on this,” she said.
Reed gave her an uncertain glance. “Are you doing okay?”
“Oh, yeah, I’m fine.” She stared away.
“You don’t have to eat it if it’s too bad or you’re allergic,” Heidschi said, their tone neutral. “It’s nothing but a sign of affection and a custom of hospitality. It shows I’m really ‘pumped’ to meet you.”
“Please don’t say that,” Bayce said too quickly. Then, after a moment’s pause, she started getting up. “I have to go. To the bathroom. Not to jerk off! Darnit, why did I say that part?” Now she was sitting down again. “Okay then,” she grumbled, to herself but also way too loudly for just herself. “I guess I’ll just sit here in a total, awkward silence instead. I’m sure everyone would like that!”
Well, she was right about the awkward silence, except that it stretched out and consumed us all.
Reed slowly reached an arm around Bayce’s shoulders. “Let’s all respect Bayce’s jumbled feelings and not acknowledge what just happened, except insofar as Bayce might become ready to acknowledge it.”
Bayce was staring through the table, beyond the beyond. “Um…yep…”
Heidschi looked just as confused as…the entire table. Then again, maybe I was the least confused person here. If this didn’t have anything to do with sexy Victorian pumpkin maids, I would eat my hat. The shepherd packed up and put away the pie. “I sense I’ve brought about a traumatic response. Should I…take my leave?”
I shook my head. “NOT UR FAULT. THERES MORE TO TALK ABOUT! PLUS MORE TO EAT”
Everybody looked to and fro. Then they tentatively started talking business. Reed could be the mediator—I just enjoyed snapping people out of their funks.
…But as it turned out, there wasn’t much to talk about. Apparently, they’d gone over it pretty early in the evening. Chora said, “We decided we will do it: go out all together two days from now, joining the Outlasters in their investigation.”
“COOL OK WHAT ABOUT TOMORROW?”
Nobody had an answer to that.
Reed was searching for words and ideas so clearly, I could practically see the jumbled words floating before her eyes. She pulled out the answer as slowly as a magician spits out scarves. “Why don’t we all train together?” she said.
Chora gave it some thought. “We can.”
“Okay,” Bayce mumbled, still looking at nothing.
“I would like that,” Heidschi said. “But now that that’s been settled, I guess I ought to leave.”
Reed reached out a free hand that nearly reached their shoulder. “Oh, no! No no! You don’t have to feel unwelcome.”
“It’s not that…”
Well, we did have room for them. In a sense. I spelled out, “WE HAVE SPACE! U CAN STAY IN THE DEN!”
“Yeah,” Chora said. “A person and a cat could sleep down here easily.”
“ACTUALLY UM…” I gave Reed a look that said, How much can I say before your face goes beet red?
Apparently, just about nothing!
“Yeah…Taipha may or may not be sleeping down there tonight.”
“Reed,” Bayce said, eyes still elsewhere, “I’m so proud of you.”
“Okay! I think this dinner is over. For real this time!”