Corvayne: Before we start, thank you for letting us record this. Can I test to make sure it works?
The Dust Man: I don't mind. You pay for your answers, and you'll get them. I do not intend to manipulate your memories or deny you anything you can safely get out of me. I will not answer a question that does extreme harm to you in any way. I'll let you know the rules in a moment. First... did you want drinks?
Lady Blood Claw: I'll order for myself.
TDM: Not very trusting. Good. Stay sharp. And you, Corvayne?
Corvayne: Seru told you my name?
TDM: We haven't discussed price yet, so to be polite... Seru was exactly who I was looking for, as I was looking for a connection with you. I didn't know your name, and she didn't say it, but it's very easy to see you walking around with a botanical garden of cursed thorns dragging behind them.
LBC: You have high system Mastery.
TDM: This was true before I knew the real numbers as well. I am going to save you some time and present the deal: For most questions I want you to perform a quest for The Barkeeper, on behalf of Falenti, dedicated to Gygax and Lythandies. The Barkeep is mostly just there as an arbiter. Falenti is 'paying' for these with the questions, and Gygax and Lythandies are the beneficiaries. As for the Quests... some will be difficult, some will be easy. I rate them based on how good your questions are.
LBC: I don't agree without questions about the deal. My first question: What if we fail to do those quests?
TDM: An interesting question.
LBC: Well?
TDM: I'll collect the effort one way or another. You have a deadline of oh, fifty years.
C: Can we offer you anything else?
TDM: Freebie. Yes! For example, I'll take Hari and The Spider.
C: No.
LBC: Let's leave, this thing is-
TDM: Don't be so hasty to uproot yourself. That was a joke. See, I am a being of time. I don't need to ask you for her. She'll find her way to me eventually. Just like you will find your way back the Magus.
C: If you hurt Hari-
TDM: You can do nothing to me that I have not already done to myself, and I am not going to harm her when she comes to me after you are long, long, long gone.
C: Gone?
TDM: Agree to my terms. That ones a real question. One that would put a terrible burden on you. Hmm... that one might be too dangerous. Oh! I should warn you, the cost is on a sliding scale. The Barkeep knows the score or this deal is null and void.
LBC: I don't like this. We should go find someone we can pay gold. I am-
TDM: Miss Blood Claw... Corvayne could save the Brides. Anastasia could. Hari could. You, as you are, won't be able to do it.
C: Lady?
LBC: How do you know about them?
TDM: Agree to my terms.
C: I agree.
LBC: Corvayne!
TDM: That's a lovely color under your top layer of pigment, my little flower. Teal with waves of Neon Green. I'll give you a question if you tell me what that means truthfully.
C: Don't tell him if it's bothering you.
TDM: Well miss LBC, I don't think you need tell me what red is. You can be expressive if you want.
LBC: Teal with green waves like an ocean means I'm worried.
TDM: Good. See Corvayne? The gruff alien woman worries about you.
C: Lady...
LBC: I want to ask my companion a question.
TDM: If you are facing him and address it to him I'm not going to count it as a question, and therefor will not answer it. I'm not a pedantic jackass. That much.
LBC: Corvayne, what's our most important question?
TDM: Waitress! Sour Spring Lemonade for all of us. Put a little extra sugar in the ladies cup, she seems bitter today.
C: I wish we had listed them by priority now... I want to ask him what I need to do to marry Wick.
LBC: (audible groan) Something we both need. Getting rid of our curses.”
C: What are ways we can rid ourselves of curses?
TDM: That's a good question! You are dealing with two different responses. Some of the afflictions he has are based on conditions the curse makes difficult. Others can be shattered with information. The Curses act as defenders against you learning that information, and in some cases retaining secondary facts that would lead you to understanding what you have to break.
LBC: You did not name a single way.
TDM: Tut, tut. (Sounds of glasses being put down) Thank you. Ahhh, best lemonade in this universe or any other. So... you've already sundered a few curses. Ones with absurd time limits, some based on stepping foot onto Cascadia. I cannot tell you the exact conditions for your remaining curses or one of the big ones will start thrashing you and me and this bar and we'd both be kicked out to a waiting room. I can, however, tell you the best way to get rid of them all.
C: You are dancing around the point.
TDM: Ah! Perhaps a bet, my prickly young one. To see if you think it's worth a question after I answer.
LBC: Don't bet this thing anything.
TDM: FIRST! They are all usually based on how you think and how other people treat you, as well as how you treat yourself. So, after being cursed you can start fixing all the curses by experiencing new things and taking personal risks. Not just jumping off cliffs, more akin to stepping out of your comfort zone, or develop yourself against what the curses took away. It works because the magical constructs have to keep reconnecting and thinking about their own weak points. Learning new skills, having new experiences and feelings harm them. As does growing your soul, making it hard for them to cover it all, and eventually they wither enough you will be able to know what they are and start untangling yourself. So yes, do new things. Try new things. Seek out novelty.
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C: I suppose that-
TDM: Second! The Pilgrimage remakes you bit by bit. It was holy and important to them for a reason. Walk the road, and find the holy places of the ones who came before. In doing so, the means to crush the curse and the internal power to do so will be yours.
C: Is there a th-
TDM: Third. The Tower, and the Dungeon. You can set yourself on a path for enlightenment at the top of the Tower and suffering at the bottom of the Tower. That has it's own costs, but power is it's own protection from those curses. That and you might find things that help fix yourself.
LBC: Good we have options, but I suspect the last one is ha-
TDM: Fourth!
C: You do not need to shout at us.
TDM: Fourth. Time. Time undoes everything. A few more thousands of years and they will weaken, then a few more thousand and you will shed it entirely.
C: I don't think I have that much time.
TDM: Not if you want to marry that girl, no.
C: I want to ask the first question that will cost me a quest. If you were me, what would your plan be?
TDM: Oh bother. A good one! Right now I'd say put the moves on Lady Blood Claw and Seru and maybe Spicy Princess.
LBC: I don't care if it gets me kicked out, I want to kill-
TDM: That's if it was me in Corvayne's shoes. Shush. What you are looking for... I'd knock out the quests you'll owe me, then break camp and focus on getting stronger as you decide how to go about moving to the next world. You have a lot of things you need to do for power. I told Seru about them, but I know you forget things. For starters, clean house in yourself. The curses and your own complicated feelings make it harder but you need to keep working on them. You may wish to sweep the board clean, so to speak. Oh! Tonight, think about the most important words to you. Perhaps focus on [[Growth]], [[Understanding]], and [[Unity]].
C: Why did you say them like that?
TDM: You'll figure it out in the next day or two. Also, learn [Springwind] already. Work with Seru on her hand-to-hand skill, she has better hand to hand visualization than you do, and you can learn it faster anyway from someone you have karma with. Also help her find a nice, boring guy to ride. Maybe be her wingman. Or make it happen yourself.
C: I don't know what to say to that last part... and you gave me a list of important things to do next.
TDM: I can't give you a grand solution to all your other problems. You are not the person you're going to become yet. Don't try to skip the whole journey. I'm not your mom.
(Sound of glass tipping and ice clattering on wood)
LBC: Corvayne? Are you okay?
TDM: I didn't think that would wound you so much. Poor kid. If it makes you feel better, you deserve better than the hand you were dealt.
C: I have my question. Where is my Mother?
(long pause)
TDM: I forfeit my price for that question because I cannot answer that without triggering your curse and, even if I gave you my answer, it be useless as it's broad and out of date and out of our reach. I also can't get to the places she's been. I'm here from a bit of luck, and I know there are paths to where I need to go. In some ways, I am as lost as you. I can say she is alive.
C: You sound like my father right now.
TDM: I am not him.
C: Does... does my mom hate me?
TDM: I forfeit my price for that question. Free answer: No.
(Silence, then sound of chair scraping)
LBC: I will not let this continue-
TDM: ((Sit.))
(Sound of chair creaking sharply and scraping the floor)
TDM: If I wanted to tear you apart? Break you down? I could. I've been scheming for a billion years at least. You two are lost souls at sea, trying to find land in a fog bank. I would not kick you away, when you are both so close to safety. So, let's keep going with this deal, right? After all, I could be robbing you blind and piling quests on you. So ask something worthwhile and specific so I can answer it. If you decide the trouble was worth it, come back and we'll talk.
LBC: You think you-
TDM: There's no violence to be had here. Work on your gains.
C: What are we not doing, in particular, that will let me and my friends take on threats like Argyle?
TDM: Better, better. Spend your free points. You get points for leveling up. Most people don't know it, because it's flagged at system 10 or something. Hari can see system 4, maybe 5 if she has time to investigate over and over. Argyle had nearly 100 points he was missing out on.
LBC: How do we-? (hiss of frustration)
TDM: Accepted! (chuckles) Go to sleep thinking about the stat you want to raise. Thanks for the question.
LBC: I didn't ask it all the way!
C: What are the memories I'm seeing? Is what I remember real, and everyone else afflicted by something?
TDM: Oh, now you think I'm able to skim your memories? Also, that's three questions by my count.
C: You know things becase you are doing this on behalf of Falenti. As you did with Seru's questions, you are trading favors for him with Lythandies and Gygax. Gygax's powers are related to information. You have some method of pulling them out of the aether, and you know about us because the dice rolling motion goes both ways.
TDM: Ah fishing for info by making guesses! I can read your face too, you know. Even a poker face like yours under high enough observation is an open book. I'll be nice again. You are not correct but that is a good line of thought. Think like that as much as possible. Even if your memories are not real, they mean something. When you're dreaming, you are pulling from somewhere. You need clarity. What you should do is find someone in your group who knows how to use lucid dreaming. It will aid you in the Mindscape as well.
LBC: What does me being a Pilgrim mean?
TDM: It's just a race. Compared to a human like myself, I'd say you're physically taller than most beings, have sharper ears, and a few extra organs that help you navigate the pilgrimage road. Both better tolerance to environmental changes and a sharper mystical sense of where to go. If you are worried about breeding with a human, well based on gestation periods I think there's a good chance-
LBC: Cease that.
TDM: (laughter tinged with radio-like crackling) As you wish. You might be able to turn on a few ruins here or there, but ultimately there is no divine destiny in your heritage, unless you choose to make it so.
C: What's the- No. What was going on with Wick?
TDM: She's a Wizard, Corvy. Wizards are hybrids of two beings... one of the few ways to really cheat the system. I don't know enough about what rides in the cores to give you better info, but I don't think they are entirely just happen stance tower-made loot. I suspect a lot of things that seem weird is the tower having an immune response reaction.
C: You don't know about the Wizard cores, though?
LBC: (Hisses)
TDM: My vectors of information has one clear example, one murky example, and one example you already know of. My best known Wizard is a sort of symbiont meant to repress [Invader] status and produce better stats. Wick is a Wizard too, and her ability to pull back time is certainly one of the keystones of what her fusion is trying to accomplish. The last hybrid I've seen was some sort of apex predator also using the core to prey on things while suppressing [Invader] status.
LBC: Corvayne stop and think about what you're asking! We don't know what this is going to cost us!
TDM: I'm trying to be polite and not throw him a land-mine. I see futures, and some of them don't have the inner-group turmoil I see coming.
LBC: Turmoil… do we have to fear anyone in our group?
C: Lady, You were just-
LBC: Not asking about her. (can be heard saying something quietly that sounds like 'specifically'.)
C: Oh. Then it's okay.
TDM: There are many liars in your midst, and you will rub shoulders with more villains as you walk down your path, but only one will walk with you who's heart is too bitter to fix. So, yes? But not who you think, and they are not yet your enemy. I will not name names. I would not steal the one happy ending I see from you, even if the road is dark.
C: A straight answer would help more.
LBC: You are saying there's a traitor? Who's the Traitor? What are they going to do?
TDM: This is in the future. They will provide you free wi-fi.
C: That's a non answer if I ever heard one.
LBC: I do not trust your answer.
TDM: A trade then for a better directive: Make peace with your enemies when you can. They can become your closest allies.
LBC: Useless!
TDM: Reflect on your own past, and let your skin show if you see the irony.
(Corvayne laughs)
LBC: You-
TDM: Am less blue than you. Tut tut, I got my information right from the tap, Lady Blood Claw. You could probably figure it out if you asked the right people. Anyway, I think that was a good session. Any last questions?
C: What's the next big threat to us?
TDM: The greedy raven in the north, a scheming dying man in the middle, and a long forgotten monster sleeping in the south. Take your pick.
C: I petition that's not worth a quest.
TDM: I keep you on your toes.
LBC: You gave Seru better answers.
TDM: Yes.
C: What's your goal?
(Quiet)
TDM: Ah. Fine. Right now? Making connections and farming piety and recognition for Falenti. Looking for help, too. For example, I need folks who can get to go to the bottom of The Dungeon. Like the 'Towers' you go in but they head down. I think what I need is likely on the 100th floor down. I need someone worthy to look for... something. You might one day be a good fit for what I need, but... I want you to come back when you know a little more.
C: Why don't you go? You seem able.
TDM: Imagine you are sticking your hand into water, looking for something there. A fish, a coin you dropped, or a shell that caught your fancy. Pressing your arm into the water you might stir up dust, startling the fish, covering the coin, or pushing the shell away. What I do here is subtle. Nearly invisible but for the right eyes.
C: Why me?
LBC: Corvayne stop-
TDM: You are hard enough to do a job, soft enough to have reasons to do it. I must go soon, I try to keep my interference subtle, after all! We will speak again. Looking at my list... hmm. Uhh... I counted 3 questions so 3 quests from the barkeep. Yes. All good!
LBC: Three...
TDM: Good-bye!
(Hissing)
C: He's gone...
LBC: The bastard! The entire time he wasn't even keeping proper count!