Kalie Rana
With the song of parting sung, and all the rest of my loose ends on Cerith tied—for now—Lux and I made our way down to the harbor. I could see the royal procession waiting at the battleship’s side. I knew that my father and the Grand Admiral were waiting for us there. Knowing Joanna and Ashreal they would not be, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that they were probably watching. Further away from the ship, on the tip of the harbor’s sound waited a group of five individuals that I could just barely see. As the rough hewn path down the cliff side transitioned to the cobblestones of the harbor, their whistles told me who they were.
Malik, Qivioq, Siiva, Lyia, and Kunnak. The other students of the Petrel. It pained me that the last I would see of them was from far away, but despite their natures as powerful majin, they were both low-born of the Isles and from the outlying tribes, which meant that our last goodbyes would need to be done at a distance. The only one amongst them who would’ve been able to see me off in person, Kunnak, wasn’t the type for a sappy goodbye anyway. Especially not for me. Seeing them, I whistled my response, a short two-tone. Although we spoke of it before, they would already know for certain that it was my intention to leave after the song of parting this morning. That knowledge however, didn’t help.
“Friends?” Lux asked.
“They are.”
“They won’t be seeing you off?”
“Sadly, no.”
“That’s a shame.”
“It really is but the time has come. I doubt the Admiral or my father would like for me to waste even more time for something so silly.”
“I don’t really think it’s silly for you to want to say goodbye to your friends.”
“Well, it’s not goodbye, now is it? I mean, there’s a good chance that the White Raven won’t even choose me.”
“I don’t know if your chances are as slim as you hope. That is just my opinion however.” If Lux thought as much, there might have been a bit more to worry about than even I imagined. Politically speaking, there would be little reason why the White Raven, the leader of one of the strongest alliances in all of the known world, would choose me. Cerith may have once been a powerful kingdom in its own right, but it had been a long time since the Roar of Tide. And besides my best attempts, the influence of my old life over this small kingdom was stymied time and time again by several plain factors, first of which was that we were a small isolated island kingdom. If the White Raven still wanted me despite that, I would question the man’s intelligence.
Even though it wasn’t exactly the outcome that I was hoping for, there was no denying that Lux’s compliment itself brought a smile to my lips.
“Well then, gods forbid, if I do end up getting chosen, that does not mean I will not be able to return to Cerith.”
“I’m sad to say Princess, but the Ravencourt of Corvus is not the sort of place that one can enter and leave at their leisure.”
“So what? Are you saying I won’t be able to leave?”
“All I’m saying is that if you want to leave, it may be a little harder than you think.” My worry about stepping on that boat renewed in full force.
What if this really was the last time I was able to return home? Would they really trap me there?
“That being said,” Lux continued as we reached the head of the cobbled pier, “In my opinion, I highly doubt they could make you do anything that you truly didn’t want to do. Including getting married to some tyrant.”
“Careful how you talk about your liege, you wouldn’t want someone like the Admiral hearing that, would you?”
“I’m only using your words.”
“I guess you’re right there.” Upon hearing my voice, Father’s attention broke away from his conversation with Maria and Yohann and turned to see us coming down the pier. He was seemingly both exasperated and thankful that I was there.
“Kalie! Thank goodness. I was worried you weren’t coming.” As he spoke, he rushed over to me, wrapping me in a hug before recoiling at the touch. “Why are you wet? Were you caught in the storm?” He paused for a moment, before realizing what happened. “It was yours. Of course it was. I’m sorry for even asking, it was beautiful.”
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“Of course I’m here. I decided last night, did I not?” He grasped me tightly by my shoulders, pressing the drying clothes to my skin.
“I… I guess you did.” Behind a small hiccup, he held back his tears. “I’m sorry, I don’t mean to… you just remind me so much of your mother right now.”
“Mother?”
“Just seeing you now, you look almost exactly like she did, the first day that I met her, all those years ago. A little rain notwithstanding. It was her first time coming to Cerith, and there wasn’t an ounce of doubt in her then, just like you now.”
Not an ounce of doubt? Is that how he sees me?
The reality was that I was terrified of what was coming next. I was worried beyond reason about what the rest of my days would hold, and worst of all, I couldn’t say a word about it. While there was a choice, it was between one that would hurt everyone but me, and one that would be painful to me, but keep everyone else safe. So, there wasn’t really a choice I guess. That was my responsibility, to leave, and to bring prosperity back to my home. Regardless of whether I came back with it. This new life has already given me nine years of happiness that I couldn’t have even imagined during my old life. If this is all that I could do to give back, then so be it.
“Thank you Father. Your words are too kind. All that I can hope is that I am able to live up to your expectations.”
“Expectations? I don’t my dear. I hate that you are forced to do this for us. If only there was another—”
Just as Father was about to continue, a crewman called down from the high deck of the battleship above us. From so high up, with the wind from my song of parting still blowing through the harbor, it was difficult to hear him. But, whatever he said, sparked a flurry of movement from some of the other men that were already in the process of loading cargo onto the boat.
The Grand Admiral broke away from overseeing the work to return to the royal procession. “We must be on our way. Ill portents are growing.”
“Do you think that your departure should be held? Until the portents improve maybe?” The faltering in Father’s voice was clear, as the last of his personal wants showed themselves.
“I don’t see why. Although I’m most familiar with the sea directly around Cerith, there’s no reason that I cannot change the waves,” I offered, although it pained me to do so.
“I guess you are right. It’s time to go,” Father said, “before things get worse.” Was he worried about the sea, or was he worried about himself? His words were already becoming difficult, so maybe it was for the best to leave quickly, to keep his dignity.
“I love you, Father. I can’t wait until I see you again.”
“Neither can I, my dearest one. However long it takes, it will not be soon enough.” A tight hug and heavy kiss to my forehead were his final parting gifts. We ascended the wooden tower and crossed onto the battleship’s deck.
It saddened me to see Vincent standing with Father and Yohann on the pier below. There was no way that I would have been able to bring my entire staff from the Palace, but I was glad that at the very least I had Maria alongside me. There was a value in having someone familiar with mainland customs, and I was sure Father was very happy that of everyone who could’ve come, that it was Maria. She was serious enough and smart enough for the both of us, afterall.
“I am going to go to your cabin and make sure that everything is up to standards,” Maria said, the moment our feet hit the deck.
“Of course, I’m going to stay out here. I want to see Cerith off.”
“Please enjoy. I will let you know when everything is ready.”
“Thank you, Maria. I appreciate it.” Maria’s smile was subdued. I could only imagine the sorts of thoughts running through her mind, but I was sure at least half of them were worries.
The Grand Admiral and Lux landed on deck next, followed by several porters carrying large crates full of documents and books. Without stopping the Admiral made a bee-line directly toward his cabin, without giving me so much as a second look. While Lux stopped for a moment.
“Princess, the Admiral and I have some paperwork to look over before we are able to make way toward the mainland, will you be alright by yourself?” I couldn’t help but hear the secondary question that was hidden beneath his first. You are going to stay on the boat, right? We don’t need to assign someone to watch you all the way back?
“Please, don’t mind me. I’ll find something to occupy my time. This is the largest ship I’ve ever been on afterall, I cannot wait to take a look around.”
“Alright, well I’ll try and be quick, and maybe I can show you around?”
“I’d like that.” We shared a smile for a moment, before he turned around and jogged off to the Admiral’s quarters.
The boat cast off, and unmoored from the pier’s solid foundations, I felt the boat ever-so-slightly rock. The crewmen who scuttled around the deck were much too preoccupied to pay me any mind, so I took the opportunity to be alone, and ascended to the high stern deck of the boat, to get the best view of my departure and of the royal procession. While I couldn’t exactly see my father from a distance, I could see Vincent and Yohann, huddled around where he had been sitting.
Was he crying?
The first question begat a second.
Why wasn’t I?
It was possible that I had cried every tear that I was going to, following the song of parting. But, there was another possibility. Now that it was happening, there was a possibility that I was just ready for it. Come what may.