Despite my mood wavering back and forth over how I felt about my near future, the rest of the day went by without issue.
The drive over to the mutant outpost was uneventful, some calm contentedness filling the quake-wagon as we made our way to pick up the mining materials. Roxy seemed a lot more comfortable with everything that revolved around the League and my step into heroism. I was glad one of us was. This amount of self-doubt was unlike me.
In part, it was due to the actual process being out of my control; I was sure. Left to twiddle my thumb until the League told me when to jump and how high. It turned out I was better at taking direction when it was just who needed killing discretely.
My mind was filled with all manner of revolving thoughts. Silhouette. Natural Disasters and our reveal to the public. Everyone knowing about Roxy and I. The World Government wanting me dead and Goldarch unstable. A potential League of Villains threatening the order within the city. The new colleagues and adversaries I was about to earn by taking up my new role.
Part of me hoped that the mutants would rebel and give me the opportunity to let off some steam. They did not, and were actually relatively friendly considering the appearance of the super. After fixing a few of their structures using her strength, they were a little more accepting of her, and—in exchange for some medical supplies from our warehouse—they handed over a crate of ore.
[Is it strange that we barely go two days without trouble, yet I feel a day of comfort makes me rusty?]
Roxy moved her eyes away from the side window, where she was watching the wastelands roll by on our way back home. “Yeah. I understand it, though. Want to spar when we get back?”
I nodded.
We were getting to the point where I didn’t think I could beat the rest of the team if it came down to it. While Roxy was still working out the details of her overpowered lava abilities, the others were improving thanks to our wasteland adventures. Belle was more than just a shielder, and Ren was more willing to do what was required in a fight. With the Captain’s experience, the difference from the last time I fought them would be noticeably different.
Had I improved?
I had better control over my magic. My gear hadn’t improved much, and as always, I was reliant on the tech at my disposal. That said… with some preparation and the right location…
[We should bring the others in for training before we are put to work.]
“You just want to try to fight us all again, don’t you?”
My eyebrow raised, but I didn’t look at her.
[Am I that easy to read?]
“Sure are.” She sighed. “You’ve held the belief that you’re a tool with a singular purpose for so long that if you’re not constantly sharpening the blade and making sure you have the upper hand, then you’re worried you have no use anymore.”
The quake-wagon fell into silence, aside from the tyres eating away at the sand and loose stone as we traveled.
“I’m a loudmouth and a klutz at the best of times, but I get you, Dubs. From that time I saw you in the casino. You were shredded and bleeding, hand stabbed through, and yet even with me standing there, you still finished your contract.”
[Now I will have the League telling me what to do.]
“No, now you have legitimacy. You’re a citizen and have a stable career that doesn’t involve shady assassinations.” She leaned toward me and prodded me on the leg. “You’re kinda cute when you’re nervous, you know.”
[I never said I was nervous.]
“You don’t have a monopoly on empathy, Dubs. While the stoic killer thing is hot, we all know you’re a softie on the inside. The way you’re with me and Clara, and even the rest of the gang… you’re more human than you think.”
I let that statement sink in. The point in life where I felt sorry for myself and undeserving of all the nice things I now had around me was long past. Whether I had karma coming my way or not, no longer mattered. I was living for the now and moving forward to build an actual future. Despite my apprehension about becoming a known public figure, Roxy hit the nail on the head about everything.
If I knew her as well as she knew me, then I was willing to bet she was about to enjoy being the knowledgeable and confident one as I found my League feet. I gave her a brief glance and a nod.
[Alright, you win. Once the first leg of my new job is long behind me, I’ll-]
The rest of my voice cut out from my vocalizer with a short shriek as the quake-wagon hit something. My thoughts were a flash of various slideshow stills. My body crumpled against the steering wheel. Darkness filled the cabin as the vehicle dropped and flipped forward. Cargo and debris crumbled and bounced around behind us as vertigo had us twisting overhead. Roxy swore as the seatbelts kept us tied to the chairs as the roof hit the rocky wasteland, sand blowing in through any open gap.
And then there was darkness.
A sharp tone rang in my ears. Vision slowly returned, my eyes trying to adjust without my goggles. There was a dull pain that radiated through my body, and I couldn’t move. Perhaps I just needed a moment. I blinked and frowned at the overcast sky.
It hadn’t been cloudy before the vehicle… where was…
A shadowed figure stepped over me, someone I hadn’t been expecting… although their name escaped me. Probably due to my brain rattling around in my skull. This new person was a man, mostly obscured by black tactical equipment, his face a grisled mess of thick beard, cigar smoke, and a scowl that made me feel uncomfortable.
The wisp of smoke coming from his held pistol didn’t fill me with confidence either.
“I’m sorry, Bard,” he said, as rain began pattering from the darkening sky. “I’m sure you understand. Actions have consequences.”
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I opened my mouth to respond, and froze. There was no vocalizer to transcribe my thoughts, just a tongue tasting dirt and blood around my teeth. Now my shoulder felt like it was burning up.
The man turned his head to look at the surroundings, but I was unable to move my own to follow his gaze. His face was blurred and dotty, my vision failing as if my own mind was censoring this antagonist. Even the clouds danced and faded away as a chill ran through my aching torso.
“Only fitting that you go out last. Let the death gasps and stench of those you led astray be your last living memories.”
Like a ghost, he faded away. A mist that faded from my mind as his words became reality. The smell of blood and death filled my senses. Struggled gasps for air that slowly petered out. Someone’s final groan. My own body shuddered, convulsing and trying to prevent the inevitable. Any confusion and tension washed away as a calm washed over me, and then I felt warm.
“Dubs? Dubs?”
My eyes flickered open again, the bright and clear sky overhead partially eclipsed by the worried face of Roxy.
[Not the best nap I’ve ever had.]
“Motherfucker,” she sighed and shook her head. “One of the boxes clocked you in the head, I think. How you feeling?”
I raised up my gun-arm and allowed a long sigh to flood out of my re-breather. Dying to a vehicular accident would have been rather underwhelming, but the dream-like flashback to the time I was left for dead was almost as bad. Some of the chill of that vision had lingered within, despite Roxy’s warmth radiating beside me.
Led them astray.
There was no guarantee that any of what had come back to me was accurate. Dreams never were. The phrasing bit at me, either way. If it was my fault… my initiative… that got everyone else killed, then was I making a repeat mistake with my new group? I had already dragged them through a few deadly situations.
[All things as expected, just a little haunting from my past creeping at the back of my mind.]
“Appreciate the candor, Dubs.” She held her hand out to help me up. “Not the time, I know, but the League also has some of the best therapists on the continent.”
I grunted as the super lifted me up to my feet with little issue. My body ached all over, especially the back of my head, but it looked as though I had gotten out of the accident with little actual injury. Roxy had a few scratches, but otherwise just appeared a little shaken up.
[Noted.]
A short response that probably sounded dismissive, but given that I was trying to become more stable, I did take the information with serious consideration. It was surprising the League hadn’t made mention of it more overtly given they wanted to send me out through the city playing nice at least half of the time.
I turned my glance over to the quake-wagon, and my heart sank further.
While as sturdy as any vehicle available to the general public could get, the sudden crash and flip had buckled in most of the front end, bent the axle, and puckered in the roof in sections. Steam ran from it as it lay upside down, helpless. My gaze turned back to the cause of this calamity.
“Part of the ground collapsed,” Roxy said, gesturing to the wide crack through the ground as we walked over.
Not entirely out of the realm of possibility. While I wasn’t a geologist, it stood to reason the wasteland was probably filled with cave systems, ruins from before the Weather Wars, and other similar explanations—such as…
[I believe this was a trap.]
“You think?” She rubbed at her short hair as we stood near the edge of the dip. “Shit, it does look like it was dug out with something. Covered with thin material… but who would do this out in the middle of nowhere?”
I sighed and pointed a finger at something mostly obscured with sand and debris. A small electronic box, a faded red light, slowly blinking on a basic control board.
[There’s a chance we are about to find out.]
Not really a problem I felt like dealing with. Another look at the quake-wagon, and I changed my mind. Assuming our assailants came with vehicles, that might be an easy way back home. Perhaps I shouldn’t have complained about my day being too boring.
“Kinda ironic, isn’t it?”
I tilted my head back to the super, who had a shit-eating grin on her face.
“All this trouble to get the ore for making super killing bullets, and a crate of the stuff almost killed you just as you became a hero yourself.”
While my throbbing skull didn’t quite see the humor in it, she had a point. Maybe I was trying too hard. I held up my hand and flexed my fingers before looking at my gun-arm. We’d been burning the candle from both ends for a while, constantly bouncing between fights in the wastelands. A legit employment under the League should be a good excuse to take a breather. Go a few days, maybe a week, without mortal peril.
[Being a magnet for danger has some downsides.]
“But some pluses too.” She grinned and tipped an invisible hat. “It’s what got you me, after all.”
[For that I’m eternally grateful.]
“Smart ass.”
We turned to see dark shapes across the horizon. A section of vehicles, hopefully, so that we could get home without having to call for backup. While the rest of the team were still on their mandated break, I didn’t want to bother them with the minor issue of a car crash. Not when we weren’t really injured.
“Oh, check this, Dubs.” Roxy drew my attention to her outstretched hand.
While she furrowed her brow and clenched her teeth, her lower arm glowed bright amber, turning to lava. As she dripped the molten rock to the sandy ground, her cupped hand started to fill up. She then cooled herself, dried rock flaking from the limb as she returned to normal—leaving a handful of cooling stone like a ball in her grasp.
“What do you reckon?” she asked, narrowing her eyes out to the approaching targets. “We’ll make them pay for ruining the quake-wagon.”
----------------------------------------
As the makeshift buggy rolled into our home area, I felt comfortable to be back home safely.
Roxy had been fishing for compliments on her new technique, and I’d lavished them generously, quietly thankful that she hadn’t exploded the larger mutant vehicle that we required for bringing the ore crate and other bits taken from my wagon. Plus, it was useful that she had found a way to deal damage at range with her ability, given that she was mostly a melee bruiser when it came to heroics.
[Clara has been very insistent that I give her every detail about what happened.]
The super nodded as she hopped out of the open side of the buggy. “She still gets notifications on your current health, I guess. What was it you saw when you were out? You mentioned a ghost?”
[I had hoped that I could forget and bury that.]
She tutted and gestured over to the deckchairs. “I’ll trade you. Open up and I’ll give you a backrub.”
[I would melt.]
“I have greater control over my powers now. You’re not at risk.”
[No, I meant figuratively. It’s a deal.]
With a smile, she set off. I left the vehicle and walked over to the garden. After living in the outskirts of the city, I had come to enjoy this small patch of green. Perhaps we should get more for the rest of our area. Some… flowers or trees. While I took off my tactical gear, I filled my mind with those thoughts. Pleasant things. Regular human things.
Then Roxy returned, and I sat. Her fingers rifled through my hair, noting the bump on the back of my head—but no blood or fractures. Clara’s diagnosis had already confirmed that, but being physically prodded about was more reassuring. Once the super plied her warm fingers against my shoulders, any hesitation about holding my words back evaporated.
I told her about the odd dream memory and the figure standing over me that time I should have been dead. The potential guilt. Another shadow trying to creep over the new life I had been building.
Yet it didn’t really affect me. Roxy didn’t even need to say anything, just listen. Expelling the fog that was trying to gather vocally was enough to exorcise any demons trying to find corners to hide in within my mind. By the time she was done and I was out of things to verbalize, I felt calm. No longer worried about my future or past.
As she finished up, I raised my eyes to look at the city ahead of me.
After putting all of my growth and achievements into one pile, the weight of any potential difficulty felt like nothing. I had friends now, a relationship, and a way to exist in a less self-destructive manner. I had my public reveal waiting for me, and a few simple missions to run from the League. Nothing quite as dire as our adventures in the wasteland.
My life was about to get more straightforward, surely.