Electric 2.7: (In)efficient
Unit 1-374
[-6:17:17]
[Unit 4-50 Summons Unit 1-374]
Alarm Level 1: Mistake Probable
[Unit 4-50 Alerts Unit 1-374 of Alarm Level 1]
[Unit 4-50 Summons Unit 1-374]
Summons Received With No Amendment. Unit 1-374 Initiates Flight to Unit 4-50. Obstacles = None. Atmospheric Anomalies = None.
Mission Successfully Completed. Summons Answered.
Unit 4-50 turns towards you. No communication signals are detected. Appraisal continues for approximately 0.711114 seconds.
[Unit 4-50 Assigns a Mission to Unit 1-374. Mission = Monitor UnitDesignate: Cuicatl Ichtaca. Corollary1 = Defend UnitDesignate: Cuicatl Ichtaca. No Further Instructions.]
[Alarm Level 7: Heat Vent Malfunction Detected in Unit 1-374. Mission Success Probability Beneath Tolerable Thresholds.]
[Unit 4-50 Assigns a Mission to Unit 1-374. Mission = Monitor UnitDesignate: Cuicatl Ichtaca. Corollary1 = Defend UnitDesignate: Cuicatl Ichtaca. No Further Instructions.]
No further communications signals detected. Appraisal continues.
Incoming Information Packet. Src = Unit 4-50. Coordinates Enclosed. Image enclosed.
No further communications signals detected. Appraisal continues.
[Alarm Level 7: Heat Vent Malfunction Detected in Unit 1-374. Mission Success Probability Beneath Tolerable Thresholds.]
[Unit 4-50 Assigns a Mission to Unit 1-374. Mission = Monitor UnitDesignate: Cuicatl Sometimes inefficient. Ichtaca. Corollary1 = Defend Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca. No Further Instructions.]
Incoming Information Packet. Source = Unit 4-50. Coordinates Enclosed. Image enclosed.
No further communications signals detected. Appraisal continues.
You turn away and initiate flight to given coordinates. Unit 4-50 shifts behind you.
[-6:16:52]
Terrans Detected. Initiate Visual Scan. Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca identified.
You lower yourself behind a visual obstruction to avoid detection. Your mission has begun.
“Something wrong?” UnitDesignate: Unknown queries Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca.
“Nothing, just… I feel something nearby. Another psychic, I think.”
Alarm Level 4: Unit 1-374 Has Been Detected by Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca.
Options:
[] Evasive Maneuvers
[] Initiate Ramming
[] No Action
Initiate Ramming is the Correct Option in 87.3% of cases. Initiate Ramming Damages Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca. Corollary1 = DefendUnit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca. Initiate Ramming Prohibited.
Evasive Maneuvers Negates Surveillance. Inefficient.
[X] No Action
“Like an elgyem?” Unit Designate: Unknown queries.
“Maybe.” Your exact position has remained undetected. Surveillance continues. “Hey, Pix, can you sniff it out and scare it off?”
Alarm Level 6: UnitDesignate: Pix Will Initiate Hostilities Imminently.
[X] Initiate Ramming
You rise up and rocket out from your hiding place, catching a strange white quadruped (UnitDesignate: Pix ?) off guard with a proper Ramming attack. You pivot around in midair and accelerate to Reinitiate Ramming.
Alarm Level ?: Attack Incoming
Alarm Level ?: Attack Connected. Assessing Damage…
Alarm Level 7: Heat Vent Malfunctioning.
The ice clatters to the ground around you with no damage done.
UnitDesignate: Pix Assigned Threat Level 0.
Ramming Unnecessary.
Initiate Ramming?
[X] Initiate Ramming
UnitDesignate: Pix yelps in pain as another attack connects.
“What’s happening?” Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca queries. Query suggests an inability to obtain the information itself. Electromagnetic analysis detects no external scans. Visual analysis detects a possible impairment in her ocular scanning devices. You freeze in place so that any non-visual scanning devices have minimal chance of detecting you.
“There’s a beldum. Just floating there.”
Alarm Level 7: Reference to Class 1 Unit Detected. Identity exposed.
Options
[] Initiate Ramming
[] Evasive Maneuvers
[] Do Nothing
Before SelfQuery can proceed Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca initiates communication: “Hi. What’s your name?”
The speech carries a strange program with it. You sequester and analyze. A packet of information is attached contextualizing her communication. The program would then search your databanks for relevant context and translate. Result: “Acknowledgement. Query: Identity?”
Extremely efficient.
Information filed. Will continue to surveil. Must engage in communication to continue to surveil.
[Acknowledgement. SelfIdentity = Unit 1-374.]
Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca changes the angle of its processing segment. “That’s a strange name.”
[Negation. Efficient.]
No electromagnetic emissions detected from Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca or UnitDesignate: Unknown. Inefficient.
[Query Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca: How are messages from Unit 1-374 received and processed?]
“Oh, um, I’m psychic. Like you.”
Query Program Meaning: Psychic?
The ability to send and receive messages directly between central processing units.
Efficient. Similar to Unit001, Unit010, and Unit100 abilities. Information filed. Will continue to surveil.
“Cuicatl Ichtaca, girl, you, uh, you aren’t catching a damn beldum, okay?” Unit Designate: Unknown orders Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca. Hierarchy established. Information filed. Will continue to surveil.
“Kekoa…” No auditory signals detected. No verbal signals detected. Psychic communication possible. Unit Designate: Unknown established as Unit Designate: Kekoa. Information filed. Will continue to surveil. Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca turns back towards you. “What are you doing over here tonight?”
Options
[] Relay Orders
[] Relay False Orders
[] Do Nothing
[] Initiate Ramming
Initiate Ramming violates Corrolary1. Relay Orders may reduce receptiveness of Unit Designate: Cuciatl_Ichtaca and its commander. Do Nothing may end communication and hinder surveillance.
[X] Relay False Orders
[Unit 1-374 Was Patrolling Territory. Potential Threat Encountered. Potential Threat Investigated. Unit Designate: Pix Assigned Threat Level 0. Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca initiated communication with Unit 1-374. Present moment reached. Debriefing concluded.]
Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca begins emitting short, high-pitched audio signals. “Threat Level Zero, you say?”
[Affirmative.]
A pure psychic signal is received. [It’s okay. I won’t tell her.]
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Even with proper definitions you struggle to decipher the context. What is okay? Why would it not be okay? Who will it not tell? Terran communication codes are extremely inefficient.
“Well, good to meet you Unit1_374. Have a good night.”
Query Program Meaning “Have a good night”
Meaning: Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca assigns a mission to Unit 1-374: Be successful until direct light from the nearest star is visible.
Alarm Level 4: Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca does not have clearance to give orders to Class 1 Units.
[Unit 1-374 Alerts Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca of Alarm Level 2]
Its mouth shifts and one mouth claw down on the lower edge’s exterior. Fascinating. What is the purpose of that motion?
“It’s just an expression. I wasn’t actually trying to order you to have a good night. You can leave if you don’t have anything else to do here. That’s all I meant.”
The statement implies the capacity to give orders. The implicit meaning is incorrect. The not-order still presents a dilemma.
Options
[] Initiate Ramming
[] Evasive Maneuvers
[] Do Nothing
Initiate Ramming prohibited by Corollary1. Evasive Maneuvers ends surveillance mission. Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca can detect Class 1 Units with no detectable signals. Reestablishing surveillance would be difficult. Doing nothing appears to agitate the present Terrans.
Further analysis required. Terrans, including Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca have subordinate energy beings. Subordinate energy beings are granted near-constant access to their commander. Near-constant access would make surveillance efforts efficient.
[X] Grant Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca command privileges pursuant to Class 2 and Class 4 directives.
[Request: Entrust Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca with command privileges over Unit 1-374]
It ceases to send out auditory, electromagnetic, or psychic signals.
“Kekoa,” it finally messages, “I promise to only evolve them once.”
“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.”
Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca forcefully vents air through its mouth. It may be overheating due to processing strain. Why? What problem is it solving? Nothing? Are terran heat vents less efficient than yours? Is it simply damaged? “They asked. Not me.”
“That’s, what, your third apex predator? Fourth if you get your hands on mommy’s hydreigon?”
Not all of the codes are familiar. [Query Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca: Meaning: “Apex predator.” Meaning: “Mommy.” Meaning: “Hydreigon.”]
“Apex predator, mommy, hydreigon,” it quietly says. The program does its work.
Unit Designate: Pix is the top predator of the mountain to the south. Information filed. All organisms on the mountain assigned Threat Level 0.
Human reproduction is bizarre. Information filed. Efficiency to be assessed at a later time.
Hydreigon are large reptilians with elemental affinity and raw power that could potentially rival a Class 4 Unit. Information filed.
“What?” Unit Designate: Kekoa queries.
“Just saying stuff for the beldum. They can use my power to understand words. Think that’s why they want to tag along with me.”
Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca has invented its own reasons and projected them onto you. Correcting it would hinder the mission.
[X] Do Nothing
The two Terrans gaze at each other in silence. No communication signals are detected.
“And Pix is okay with this?”
Comment suggests that Unit Designate: Pix is a potential superior to both Terrans. Curious. Prior briefings suggested bound energy beings are traditionally in a subordinate role. Is that information incorrect?
“Pix and I came to an understanding. This is allowed.”
Unit Designate: Pix makes no attempt to give orders. It glares up at you from the ground as waves of cool air radiate away from its body.
“Metang are big fliers. Could carry gear without using the pack ‘mon trails.”
“Already thinking about exploiting your pokémon, huh?” Unit Designate: Kekoa’s mouth claws are bared. This is traditionally a sign of aggression on Terra. Are you witnessing a hierarchy dispute? “That’s unlike you.”
Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca rolls its shoulders in response. “I use what I have. And you’re the one who always complains about the gear.”
“Uh huh.” Unit Designate: Kekoa folds its arms and places them over its chest. “Look, I’m just going to be blunt: I’ve heard you talk about giant fuckoff monsters and I don’t trust you not to evolve that thing twice.”
Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca vents more air. Conflict apparently places a great strain on its processing organs. Inefficiency apparent. Information filed. “I told Mara that I like predators because they remind you not to upset them. Now…” it trails off. Unit Designate: Kekoa’s reactions suggest that the conversation is finished telepathically. Efficient. Inconvenient.
Both Terrans slowly lower themselves and sit on the ground. With a motion of its hand Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca summons Unit Designate: Pix over. Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca removes a binding orb from its mobile storage compartment and raises it into the air. “Touch the ball if you want to be caught.”
Being “caught” would reduce chances for surveillance and risk successful withdrawal at the conclusion of the mission. Not being “caught” would decrease trust from Terrans. Inefficient. Necessary.
[X] Initiate Ramming
Alarm Level 23: Corporeal Integrity Lost
Alarm Level 23: Corporeal Integrity Lost
Alarm Level 23: Corporeal Integ
Alarm Level 7: Heat Vent Malfunctioning
A quick rotation and optic scan detect no changes in your surroundings.
“Aside from your number do you have a name?” Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca queries.
[Negation]
“Do you want one?”
Terran names are inefficient. Serial numbers and class designations are efficient. An inefficient name might build trust with Terrans and advance mission objectives.
[Affirmation]
“Cool.” It pauses and bites the edges of its mouth again. “Nocitlālin?”
Query Program Meaning: Nocitlālin
Meaning: My star.
Alarm Level 11: Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca claims dominion over the solar system.
Information filed. Will continue to surveil.
“And is there a gender you’d prefer? For pronouns.”
Query Program: Gender, Pronouns.
Terran reproduction is bizarre. Only two units are required. Efficient. Units must each be from a distinct subgroup. Inefficient.
Class 1 Units have no anatomical subgroups. [Gender inapplicable.]
“So… they/them?”
Query Program: They/them.
Terran reproduction is more bizarre and inefficient than previously believed. It is not always apparent what subgroup a unit belongs to. What purpose does this serve?
[Gender inapplicable.]
Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca clears its optic screens with the lids. Why? Optical sensors are severely impaired.
“Do you mind if I call you a girl? I don’t really want to call you it. And Pix and Coco are girls. And me. I’m female.”
Information filed. Will continue to surveil.
“Not how any of that works,” Unit Designate: Kekoa states.
“Again, not calling her an it.”
Gender being inapplicable to Class 1 Units seems to cause distress to Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca. Potential violation of Corollary1.
[Gender = Female]
“Thank you, Nocitlālin.”
“Still not how it works.”
Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca rotates its optical sensors and holds out a hand. “Can I touch you, Nocitlālin? To know what you feel like?”
Speculation: Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca compensates for optical inefficiency with tactile sensory. Inefficient. Requires contact. Contact requires exposure to potential threats before they can be evaluated. Information filed. Will continue to surveil.
You slowly float over and gently lower the main segment of your body onto her hand. “Huh,” it says. “You’re warmer than I was expecting.
[Alarm Level 7: Heat Vent Malfunction Detected in Unit 1-374. Unit 1-374 is inefficient.]
“I can get a vet to look at that.”
[Negation. Terran Civilization Insufficiently Advanced. Mission Success Probability Beneath Tolerable Thresholds.]
“If you’re sure…” its hand slips off you. “Can I hug you? It’s okay to say no.”
Query Program: Hug.
Meaning: Embrace with upper appendages. Purpose: Sensory Evaluation, Processing Support. Non-violent.
Bizarre. Inefficient. How does contact help with processing capabilities? You oblige it. The act is harmless and may build trust. In turn it gently presses you further into its abdomen. “You’re just warm enough for great hugs, you know? That’s efficient.”
[Negation. Hugs = Inefficient.]
It gently pushes you up and away. “Do you get warmer when you fight?”
[Affirmation.]
“Once you’ve been fighting long enough you start to burn the stuff that touches you? That’s useful.”
“You giving therapy to a gods damned beldum?” Unit Designate: Kekoa queries.
“Part of my training style,” Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca vocalizes. In the meantime, Unit Designate: Pix jumps onto its subordinate’s lower appendages and stands on its hind legs, pushing its upper appendages into its subordinate’s abdomen.
Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca hugs Unit Designate: Pix.
[She gets jealous.]
Query Program: Jealous.
Meaning: Unit seeks to mimic or steal a trait from another unit.
[Query Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca: What trait does Unit Designate: Pix seek to mimic or steal?]
[The hug. If someone else is getting hugs, she wants a hug as well.]
Inefficient. Hugs are inefficient. Unit Designate: Pix should prioritize acquisition of efficient attributes.
“Anyways, the combat thing. That’s efficient, right?”
[High System Temperatures result in slower processing. Inefficient.]
“Sure. But it’s a trainer’s job to come up with strategies in battle. I can help with the thinking. Be–“ It begins to noisily inhale and then exhale a great volume of air. “—sides, you’re a beldum. You’re very smart.” After a gentle shake of its processing section Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca begins to raise itself. Unit Designate: Pix jumps off with a noise that sounds like a complaint. “And I’m very tired. Continue in the morning?”
Is that the role Terrans hold over subordinate(?) energy beings? Fascinating. Terrans are smarter than many energy beings. Sometimes efficient. A properly functioning Class001, 010, or 100 unit has far faster processing speeds. Sometimes inefficient. The efficiency she claims is only a result of your own inefficiency.
“You can sleep under the rain fly or in your ball. I’d let you in the tent but I’d probably hit my head getting up in the night.”
After querying enough terms to understand the statement you relay your desire to stay under the rain fly. You leave unstated that it maximizes surveillance opportunities.
The night passes with two incidents.
Unit Designate: Kekoa leaves the tent and becomes aggressive when you attempt to surveil its fluid release.
Unit Designate: ??? leaves the tent and seems confused by your presence before waking Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca, who gives a sparse and inefficient debriefing before Unit Designate: Genesis release her fluids. You surveil it at a greater distance than before and agitation seems to be reduced.
You repeat the process when Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca comes to vent her fluids followed by Unit Designate: Pix and a strange biped with a mix of red and white feathers. An apex predator. Unit Designate: Pix is also an apex predator. Unit Designate: Pix has a threat level of zero.
When it sees you the biped’s eyes narrow and it slowly lowers its body to the ground, tail sticking straight out behind it. With a few shakes of its hips in warning it leaps surprisingly high into the air, cold air rushing from its vocalization cavity. You float out of the way and it misses, crashing down to the ground a second later before getting up and staring back at you in less than a second, its tail moving horizontally.
“Coco!” Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca vocalizes. “It’s not playtime now.”
Your ‘trainer’ steps further away from the tent while you keep your ocular scanner pinned on Unit Designate: Coco. It lets out a few grunts in an apparent attempt to initiate communication.
[Query Unit Designate: Cuicatl Ichtaca: Can Unit Designate: Coco receive or send psychic messages?]
“Sort of,” it answers while draining fluid waste. “I let them talk to each other. Can you figure out how to add yourself?”
[Negation. Class001 Units possesses insufficient psychic capabilities.]
“Hmm. I’ll translate then. Later. In the morning.” It starts walking back to the tent and Unit Designate: Pix finishes draining fluids to walk alongside its subordinate. Unit Designate: Coco drains fluids right on top of Unit Designate: Pix’s waste disposal site and then runs off after the other two.
Curious. Does stacking waste fluid have an additive effect? You take a small chemical sample and perform basic analysis as the Terrans and energy beings enter a resting state. The two chemicals do not appear to interact. Deliberately stacking them is inefficient.
You compile a quick report of your initial observations, encrypt it, and cast it out to Unit100_110010.
6.4 seconds later you receive your response.
[Acknowledgement. Continue Mission.]
Directive filed. Will continue to surveil.