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Chapter 22: Bed, Bath and Beyond

Elven Lightstep (Passive): This ability allows an Elf to walk on any surface and not leave signs of their passing. -7pts Purchase? Y/N

Finally making up my mind I approve the purchase. It uses up all of my remaining points, but the wording of the passive ability seems like it could prove suitably versatile in a wide variety of circumstances.

You are Rested.

You have healed: 1 HP

Nice! I healed up a bit. Not nearly as quickly as some 'games' but I'll take whatever I can get. Perhaps it has something to do with my Vitality or maybe my Recovery stat. I make a mental note to try and gain some knowledge on that during my next Jelf time.

Brian Status: HP: 7 / 12     Stun: 22 / 22      Mana: 10 / 10

You are no longer Resting.

As I feel my meditative trance come to an end I inhale a deep lungful of air and stretch; sending a delightful tingle through my back and legs with the pull of muscle. Opening my eyes I immediately blink with the glare of the sunlight streaming through the window.

My body does feel rather stiff. Most likely from the ringing slap Crod had delivered to me yesterday, and the various cuts and scrapes sustained in the fights at the campsite.

In an attempt to adjust my vision I rub at my blurry eyes with the back of a hand then I glance over our room.

Along with the various leftover bits and pieces used in my overnight crafting, my tinkering tools still lay strewn about on the table; exactly where I had left them.

I had worked away throughout the night, stopping only briefly to answer to the call of nature and grab a snack from the leftovers on Cinnamons plate. But it seems more like a half remembered dream. Perhaps the 'Downtime Crafting Activity' was similar to my trance. It certainly felt like I had tuned out and switched to an autopilot like mode while my body and mind acted on their own accord; focused solely in a zone of creation before, too exhausted to continue any longer, I'd climbed onto the bed in the barely predawn hours of morning.

Cinnamon had been next to me on the bed when I had finally settled in to catch up on my own rest, but she's now nowhere to be seen. My initial reaction of alarm calms however when I see that her bow, quiver and bags are still sitting in the corner of the room, along with my own.

Kryst isn't in her nightstand drawer-bed either. As I sit up to place my feet on the floor, I see her on the window sill, standing in a locked pose, her tiny form blurred by the sun rising over the mountains in the distance.

The sight paints a serene picture that I've seen time and time again in all manner of entertainment media. However, it's red leaves, not cherry blossoms dancing through the open air behind her, and the usual sound of cicadas has been replaced with the notes of singing birds in the composition of this ambient soundtrack.

Slowly she slides one leg out, her balance shifting like the water in those lava wave motion machines that I've seen in the windows of metaphysical better health stores at the mall. With fluid movements she glides her hands in counterclockwise circles, turning her body and shifting effortlessly into form after form; a beautiful dance of some kind of well practiced martial arts Kata.

As interested as I am in finding out where Cinnamon has disappeared off to I hold my tongue until she is finished. Unwilling to interrupt the mesmerizing display of artistic and athletic skill from the brash, often irritating, and apparent lush, of a fairy.

Kryst inhales a long breath, drawing her palms up, before reversing her wrists at neck height, and like a physical manifestation of her exhale, pushes outward to draw the ritualistic movements to a close.

"Morning, Too Tall" she says before turning about. "About time you rolled your tight, lazy butt out of bed."

"Stop checking out my ass." I ignore the dig but enjoy the appreciation of my glutes all the same time. "Where's Cinni?" I ask.

"She went down to grab some breakfast. Said she would be right back. I told her that we all need to talk. Strangely enough, she figured that you in particular might have a few questions for her." Kyrst says, "Seems she'd rather chat up here in private instead of downstairs in a busy tavern."

I nod my understanding. As curious as I was to find out just what was going on I was not looking forward to addressing the bizarre issue either. So, in an effort to take my mind off of my bunny problem until I absolutely had to deal with it I decide to strike up some conversation with Kryst instead.

"That was really impressive." I say indicating her and mimicking some of her previous movements with my fingers.

Kryst studies me for a moment, and I can tell she is sizing up the statement and looking for a possible slight. "It's a centering form. To bring the spirit and the physical, the mind and body into a unified focus."

"That's really cool. I've always been an admirer of the 'Arts." I say, "You know, I took some Karate classes when I was a kid. Never got too far with it though. Only a yellow belt." I grin, "During what was supposed to be a sparring session, this kid, who had to have been some kind of genetic Cro-Magnon throwback. Built like an elementary school linebacker, I'm talking huge." I give a head shake and chuckle at the recollection, "Anyway, he damn near broke my nose and gave me a black eye. After that I dropped out and I never went back."

"I have no idea what half of what you just said means." She releases a annoyed sigh," But I believe the overall gist in that nonsense you spouted was, you got your butt kicked and instead of taking your licks and learning how to properly defend yourself, you simply gave up."

"Not exactly. I mean, sort of, but..."

"I'm guessing that's when you decided to pick that up?" With a scoff she points toward my gun belt hanging on the side of the chair next to me, "Cause why better your mind and body. Learn technique and how to harness your inner strength. To achieve any sort of enlightened state, when you can just be like, Pakow Pakow Pakow." Hopping about comically she makes finger gun motions.

"You are such a huge tool." I roll my eyes at her childish antics starting to see through her abrasive commentary for the friendly ribbing it was meant to be.

"You're one to talk. Normally I'd say anyone who hauls a weapon like that around is trying to over compensate for a... less than lengthy sword. But I suppose that theory doesn't hold up when it comes to you, now does it." She gives me a mischievous grin then snickers at my obvious discomfort. "Seriously though, if you are interested, I could probably show you a few forms. In case you ever again have to face down another aggressive adolescent."

"Screw you." I laugh.

"Don't think I'm your type. Maybe if I put on a fuzzy animal costume though?" Kryst smirks.

"Speaking of. I'm surprised you're able to remember anything, hell, I'm surprised you can even stand upright considering the absolute dumpster fire condition you were in last night." I grab my now finished shades from the table and quickly clean the dark crystal lenses with a scrap of cloth.

"Sometimes you have to give the mind a break." Kryst replies. "I'm fine now. When you know your body like I do the expulsion of a weak poison like alcohol is--" She cuts off mid boast as I slip on my newly created sunglasses. "What the hells are those?"

"They're shades, baby." I say, leaning back against the edge of the table and crossing my arms over my bare chest with a proud smile.

"Well, they look ridiculous."

"Do they." I say.

"Yes." Kryst gives a tiny snort.

I edge the dark sunglasses down my nose slightly with my index finger and peer over the edge. With an upraised quirk of an eyebrow I drop a bit of base into my voice. "Do they?"

Charm vs Kryst Thunderfist: Success!

Her eyes lock with my own for a brief moment before she sucks her teeth and glances away, a sly smile tugging the corner edge of her lips.

A click of the door interrupts my mental pat on the back and precedes it opening. A moment later Cinnamon pushes into the room with a large wooden tray balanced in her arms. She stiffens a bit and her ears droop in that shy endearing way of hers when she spots me.

"Morning, Cinni." I try and sound cheerful in the hope that it will ease the obvious apprehension and awkwardness knotting her shoulders. "What's that you have there?"

"Ohh umm...morning, Brian. I got us all breakfast, some clean cloths and a kettle of hot water. So we can all freshen up a little bit." Cinnamon says indicating the tray in her hands as she steps fully into the room.

"That sounds fantastic." I shoot her a smile, "You're a real gem." Readjusting my shades with a forefinger I step over and take the heavily laden tray from her.

I catch her staring at my new sunglasses. "They help with my light sensitivity." I say.

The story has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the violation.

"Oh? Neat." Cinnamon says giving me her closed eyed smile. "They are very fetching."

"Thanks." The compliment strokes my ego a bit and I can't help but puff out my chest a little while sliding my stuff over on the table to place the tray down.

Next to the steaming kettle there are a couple of empty bowls, a few face cloth sized towels and breakfast.

I take it all in, grinning at the fantasy fare and thinking back to all the times I've described similar meals in the games I've run. There's a plate piled with assorted scones, buttered with various colored jams. A small assortment of fruits, vegetables and cheeses. A heaping bowl of thick oatmeal topped with honey coated nuts and lastly a single cup, and shotglass, filled to the brim with what smells like apple juice.

"Sorry I couldn't carry any more," Cinnamon says, "but they said we could get refills on the oatmeal and drinks when we bring the tray back down."

"You kidding? This is great." I tear off and pop a bit of scone into my mouth enjoying the strange but delightful taste of whatever fruit the jam was made from. "To tell the truth this should be plenty. Unless you include the bottomless pit over there." I joke indicating the fairy with a thumb.

"Not my fault I have a healthy appetite." Kryst scoffs, "You try flying around all day and see how much fuel it takes to keep your internal fire going."

We all share a quick chuckle at that. I was kidding of course. Although she seemed to be able to consume a impossible volume in relation to her size, it was still a fraction of what we ate.

Taking a couple of the empty bowls I pour some water into each while Cinnamon retrieves the soap from her bag. I decide that I will try and look for a proper bath later, but for now, removing a bit of travel grime sounds like heaven. Lathering up a hand cloth I set about wiping away the dust and dirt of our woodland trek from my neck, face, arms and chest.

My breath catches in my throat when I spy Kryst strip down to her birthday suit in my peripheral vision.

I manage to keep my face forward and thank my lucky stars my new shades are hiding my eyes, which are straining against the corner of their sockets to watch the miniature martial artist de-robe and then climb over the edge of a water filled bowl; stepping into it like it's a gigantic bathtub.

"Ahhh ... that's nice." Kryst says, lowering herself into the steaming water.

"Kryst! What are you doing!?" Cinnamon says with more than a bit of shock in her voice. I take the opportunity to turn and give a full long glance over at Kryst, in the pretense of not knowing what Cinnamon is referring to. Ogling her toned body and fit form, committing the image to memory as she swishes the water around her before turning my attention, not quite completely, away in faux gentleman etiquette.

"Oh relax, Cinni. It's nothing that you both haven't seen before. Besides, I saw Brian's last night so I owe the perv a peak." She snaps her fingers in my direction and when I turn she points to the soap in my hands. Stunned at her attitude I pause before breaking off a piece and handing it to the fairy who immediately starts to rub up a bubbly mess in the water.

"Don't tell me you are still feeling shy around him. Especially after what you too were getting up to last night." Kryst says.

Cinnamons ears are sent into an immediate droop and her cheeks flush.

"It's not that. It's just... umm... I don't know. I guess, you are right and all." She glances to me and gives me a nervous smile. "I'm just a little self conscious about getting undressed in front of people."

"You shouldn't." Kryst shakes her head as she continues to bath herself. "You definitely have nothing to be ashamed of with that figure. I mean look at Brian here. Poor boy can barely keep his eyes from devouring those corset cantaloupes of yours."

"Dude?!" I say turning to look at the fairy squarely before adjusting my vision again.

"What? It's true." Kryst counters. "I mean ever since I met you two you've been sizing-up those things like they're going to ambush you in a surprise attack."

"Will you shut up?!" I toss my wet face cloth over both Kryst and her bowl. Covering her with the sopping material and hoping that my dark skin tone doesn't show the same blush of embarrassment that has tinged Cinnamons cheeks.

"Jeez, you people are repressed." Kryst mumbles pushing and pulling the wet towel until it splat-plops out and over the side of her tub.

The next few minutes drags along in a long, uncomfortable silence and I take the time to put on my clothes, pack away my tools, and shamefully steal glance after glance at Kryst while we all eat; nibbling away at our tasty breakfast.

"So what's up with the sex rabbit thing?" Kryst blurts causing me to almost spit out a mouthful of scone.

"What the hell, Tinkerbell?!" I squawk .

"Why am I the ass for bringing it up?" Kryst says with an attitude dripping sigh. "I'm getting real tired of the tension in here. It's beginning to tangle my tranquility." She inhales and swirls the water, closing her eyes.

After a moment with no one else saying anything she opens them and with a scowl, points an accusing finger at my chest. "You should be the one who wants answers, since you nearly ended up boning a bunny."

I don't like the way she has broached the subject, but I do agree with Krysts assessment. Pulling the chair out I give a quick sigh and sit down then turn toward Cinnamon. "She does kind of have a point, Cinni."

"I know." Cinnamon lets out a long exasperated sigh. "I'm real sorry about what happened last night, Brian. I know it must have been a real shock and upsetting for you but... I was just so embarrassed to tell you. Especially because I find you so..." Cinnamon shrugs.

"Buckable?" Kryst pipes up with a chuckle and wink.

"Yeah." Cinnamon voice gets mousey and she blushes a little.

I clear my throat. Thrown off about these women's aloof discussion regarding how do-able I was. Kryst snaps her fingers at me and points to the breakfast tray. With a sigh I slide it a bit closer so she can reach out and get what she wants herself. Though unintended on my part a consequence is getting a generous view of her as she stretches out to pluck up some of the food.

"So does this happen all the time? Like anytime you try and be ... intimate." I ask turning away from the show of fairy flesh.

"Unfortunately." Cinnamon nods, "If I get too... aroused, it tends to happen. Or sometimes if I'm given a sudden fright, too." She huffs and crosses her legs, propping her head up with a hand. "That's what happened with the Naga. When it attacked me, I was so surprised that it triggered the transformation."

"Damn, that sucks." Kryst says, and both Cinnamon and I bob our heads up and down in total agreement of the fairys overall assessment of the situation.

"Anyway," Cinnamon continues, "I had gone back home to see Pop-pop hoping that he could fix it. But, then found out he was here in Redtree so that's why I came. I mean I was still pretty embarrassed having to tell Pop-Pop about what and how it happens."

"So when I found out that you were a powerful mage, I figured that I wouldn't have to tell Pop-Pop at all, and since you can fix things, maybe I wouldn't have to tell you either. I was hoping that..." She shrugs, "That you could just fix it with your magic and we could have... bucked." Cinnamon lets out a sigh so loaded with frustrated, wanton desire that it sets an unwanted pulse through my groin. It was already hard enough, no pun intended, dealing with the fact that Krysts naked and wet fitness model body was still on display.

"Wait?" Kryst wrinkles her nose and leans back against the side of her bath bowl chewing away on a honeyed nut. "Powerful mage? What are you talking about, Cinnamon?"

"Didn't you hear before? Brian said that he had to study for years to learn the invocations to become a master magic user." Cinnamon says, nodding toward me.

For a brief moment a dead silence fills the room, then Kryst lets out a nauseatingly loud guffaw laugh, splashing about in her bathwater.

"What? What's so funny." Cinnamon says looking to me while I run my fingers over my head and through my white locks.

"Damn, girl. You made me drop my nut." Kryst snuffle snorts trying to stifle her mirth while lifting a finger to wipe wetness from the corners of her eyes.

"That's what he said." The words spill from my mouth before I realize and I immediately regret them.

Kryst pauses for a heartbeat as her brain processes and finally catches exactly what I said, "Oh, that's nasty!" She cackles, then breaks out in a another round of side clutching, boob bouncing, feet splashing, laughter.

Cinnamons looks between us obviously confused and a wave of discomfort twists my gut as she looks toward me to explain.

"I don't actually know magic, Cinni. I mean I do, sort of. But it's not like... 'magic magic' like, a wizard or something." I don't think so anyway. I pause thinking about it for a second before returning my attention to the confused bunny girl. "I can fix minor tears and breaks. Repair small items and stuff like that, but real magic?"

I shake my head. "See, when I fixed Crods fishing pole before, I was just, you know, putting on a show. I wasn't being serious about all that stuff that I said."

"So you... didn't study to become a... master of dungeons magic?"

"Well. Not like..." I hesitate with a sigh. "No. Cinni." I say sheepishly.

"Oh." Cinnamons barely audible whisper speaks volumes and makes me feel like an absolute heel.

Insight vs Cinnamon Butter: Success

The devastated look that passes over her face, the slump of her shoulders and the wet glisten to her eyes breaks my heart. I can tell that she feels terrible for falling for my silly little act and even worse for building up a hope in her mind only to have it smashed.

And the laughter from Kryst, although no longer directed at her, clearly isn't helping the situation.

"Alright enough, Kryst." I harden my voice and while it takes a few moments the fairys laughter does die down. I move over and sit next to Cinnamon and take her hands lifting them to my lips to give them a quick kiss. "Come on now, beautiful. Chin up, huh?"

"You must think I'm such a stupid, useless, dumb-bunny." She whispers, not meeting my eyes.

"What are you talking about? Cinni you are one of the most awesome women I have ever met. I would still be wandering around lost in the woods if it wasn't for you. " I give her hands a squeeze.

"And what about these?" I say nodding toward the potion bottles on her hips. "Didn't you say you made them?"

Cinnamon bites her lip and gives me a little shrug. "Yeah. But that's no big deal."

"No big deal? To hell it isn't. I wish I could make potions." I smile and release one hand to reach forward and cup the side of her face. "Not to mention I flat out owe you my life. Remember? You saved me..." I pause and glance at the naked fairy climbing out of the bath bowl. "Actually, no you saved us, from that Drayger thing."

Kryst turns, and I can see she's about to raise a hand to protest 'that she didn't need saving' but she catches my no nonsense glare and with a nonchalant shrug keeps her mouth closed.

"Beside the fact you are one of the most gorgeous women I've ever laid eyes on. You know, where I come from they would call you a Playboy bunny. " I grin, "Which, I kid you not is a term applied to only the sexiest of ladies."

"Stop it. Now you're just being silly." Cinnamon pouts but I can tell she is intrigued.

"I'm being one hundred percent serious." I give her a huge smile and a nudge, "That you would want to 'buck' me? That's like my wildest dream coming true. And I don't like hearing my dream girl putting herself down like that. Okay?"

Cinnamons ears perk up and she squirms a little. "Alright, Brian. I won't."

"Good." I smile."And listen I may not be some kind of all powerful magic man, but I promise you that you and I will figure this out. Yeah?"

Cinnamon makes a little coo and then gives me her cute, closed eyed smile. I pull her close and place a gentle kiss on her forehead and then her lips. Not the lust filled tongue battles we had previously shared but the first, of hopefully many, caring hugging, kissing embraces.

Charm vs Cinnamon Butter: Success!

"Now. Then why don't you tell us how this happened and maybe if we all put our heads together..."

Cinnamon perks up a little at that and she glances between me and Kryst who has redressed and is looping her green 'fairy tagging" sash around her waist angrily.

"Okay. Well, it all started with..." Her ears give a little twitch, "Icky?"

"The troll?" I bite back a wave of anger, "What does he have to do with this?"

Cinnamon shakes her head and points toward the door. "No. Icky is coming down the hall."

A moment later there is a single banging knock on the door before it swings open wide and I see Crods massive, greasy green form crowding the entrance.

"There you are!" Crod reaches down and grabs a couple of our bags tossing, them to me to nearly bowl me over with the casual strength behind the throw. "Grab your stuff. We've got to move. Now!"