“What the hell? Is that thing talking?” I spare a glance to Cinnamon who has gotten up to her knees and is rubbing at her butt. A quick pang of guilt rushes through me from dropping her but I push it out of my mind and turn back to what I thought was a dead, non-talking dinosaur.
Blood continues to pool and soak into the ground from the wounds torn in its throat and stomach. It’s eyes have rolled back into its oversized skull. Glazed and blank they certainly don’t look to have any life in them.
“You did hear that right?” I ask Cinnamon still covering it with my pistol. She’s collected her bow and is warily watching the beast with a newly notched arrow.
“Umm Yeah. I think so.”
I study the thing, then it’s throat twitches and I see a lump near the neck wound. I hear a small grunt then the lump slides upward and I’m instantly reminded of all those scenes of cartoon characters burrowing underground. In a mix of fascination and fear I watch the bulge continue to move under the skin toward the open mouth. With a wet noise the tongue flops to the side and then a ball of blood and meat rolls out onto the ground.
In a deft movement the ball unfurls and though still covered in grossness its shape is definitely female. The twelve inch tall gore-drenched Barbie doll flicks its arms free of blood and bits of flesh, wipes a hand across its eyes, then turns to regard the dead creature behind it.
“Nice job.” She says. “For a while there I was worried that I might have to go out the other end.” Looking about the Barbie turns and begins to walk toward the creek.
“You were in its tummy?” Cinnamon asks, her ears drooping. “Gosh, that must have been really awful.”
“It wasn’t a picnic.” The little Barbie rolls her shoulders and a pair of dragonfly-like gossamer wings unfold from where they were stuck to her back.
“Oh? You’re a Fairy.” Cinnamon says with a huge smile.
“And you’re observant. Congratulations. Would you like a carrot?”
“I like carrots.” Cinnamon coos and her ears flick upward in a hopeful expression. She glances to me and then back to the Fairy.
The fairy stops. Turns to regard us both for a moment, then with a roll of her eyes continues toward the water.
“Rrright.”
The little woman reaches the creek and hops into the shallow, yet waist high to her water, and starts to splash herself clean as Cinnamon and I share a look of total confusion.
“How long were you in that thing?” I ask.
“Listen, Too Tall? I’m currently covered in yuck. So if you don’t mind I’d rather get this crap off of me before we play question the queen. Alright?” The fairy picks a globule of hamburger like meat from her shoulder and drops it into the slow flowing water as if to emphasize the point.
“Why don’t you two go make with the cuddlie wuddlies or something till then.” She waves a hand dismissively in our direction.
I glance to Cinnamon and I see by the bashful blush flushing her cheeks and the insides of her ears that continuing from when we were interrupted is no longer an option.
Just my luck. What are the chances that killing a fantasy-land dinosaur would somehow lead to a teeny woman popping out like some pint-sized Jonah from the belly of the whale. And what’s my reward for the rescue? A weenie block from the ungrateful pipsqueak.
With a sigh I collect my sword from the ground where I’d dropped it and quadruple check the corpse. Once assured that nothing else is going to crawl out I go back to the remaining pieces of my armor and start to equip the last of it.
Cinnamon meanwhile returns to her bag and pulls out a lump of something pale and yellow. She scrapes off a piece with her dagger and then goes over to the streams edge.
“I have a bit of soap if you would like.” Cinnamon offers the button-sized chunk to the fairy who accepts with barely a nod.
While Cinnamon begins collecting the scattered firewood and fixing the campfire I continue adjusting the armor straps on my legs while keeping a close eye on our new visitor.
As the dirt washes away I’m surprised to find that, though her tiny pointed ears give her a distinctly elf-like appearance, my initial Barbie comparison is far closer than I imagined.
The light silky fabric wrapped around her body is dyed a deep red. Whether that was its initial color or if it’s now been permanently stained from dino blood I can’t be entirely sure. Either way it clings to her peach colored skin turning nearly transparent in the water and leaving very, very little to the imagination.
Perhaps it’s the fact that I was so close to tasting that sweet, forbidden fruit with Cinnamon just a few minutes ago but I can’t help but be amazed at the erotic display in miniature as she rubs herself clean and I find myself biting my lip and mentally telling her to slow down.
She is wearing some kind of bracer styled, fingerless gauntlets that cover from her forearms to the backs of her tiny hands and when she dips her arms into the water I notice what would be a silver finger ring to a human, circles her upper thigh. Intricate scrollwork etched into its surface.
Taking a moment she lathers her hair into a soapy mess then bends to the surface of the water rinsing off the suds. On her back her gossamer wings quiver and then vibrate so quickly they become invisible, the water rippling around her.
When she stands back up I see that her almost florescent magenta-pink hair is cropped short in a semi-spiked tomboy-cut that looks extremely sexy on her very feminine, wasp-waisted figure.
“Hey! Bit of privacy, pervert!” I see a frown tug at her full lips and her iris-less, magenta-hued eyes narrow in my direction.
I swing my head and upper body around way to fast to play off anything other than the fact I’d had been checking out the diminutive eye candy but on pure instinct I still attempt to do so. With what I know is a stupid look on my face I glance around the area that I’m sitting, grab a few twigs, toss them into the embers of the campfire and then dust off my hands.
Acting: Fail!
From my left I hear a weird little sigh noise from Cinnamon. She’d been stoking the slowly growing fire but stands and moves away toward her stuff, poking about in her bag absently.
Insight vs Cinnamon Butter: Success!
I can tell that she is upset with me by the slump of her shoulders and the way her ears have lost a bit of their perkiness. The knowledge that I’ve hurt her feelings makes me feel like an absolute jerk. Sure, I may have only know Cinnamon for a day but I already really like her.
Yes, she was an undeniably hot fantasy bunny girl, but it was more than that. She had a sweet, shy sort of demeanor that I couldn’t deny was just as crazy attractive as her body. And what do I do? Go and ogle some abrasive little fairy not five minutes after I get the courage to kiss her. The thought that I may have possibly ruined my chances with Cinnamon has my guts twisting in both nervousness and anger. I have to try and fix this. But how? I wrack my brain and in desperation come up with what I hope is an idea.
“Hey, Cinni? I guess my stomach settled after my rest and I got to feeling a bit hungry. I didn’t want to go through in your stuff or disturb you while you were asleep so, I went and cooked up some of that snake meat.” I say indicating one of the discarded kabobs. “ Anyhow, I hate to ask, but would you have any more of those sandwiches left?”
Charm Roll vs Cinnamon Butter: Success!
Cinnamon ears give a bit of a twitch and she pauses. She is just about to say something when a call sounds from the creek.
“Oh, yeah! You read my mind.” The fairy hops from the water and with a buzz of her wings, hovers over to plop down on one of the stones the dino-thing displaced from its attack of the campfire.
“What’ve you got to eat, Carrots?”
“Her name is Cinnamon.” I say not bothering to hide my irritation in the least.
“Whoa! Alright settle down there, loverboy.” The fairy holds up her hands in mock defense and my agitation grows. “Suppose I was thrown off by the whole Drow and pistol thing you got going on. Didn’t realize that you were actually a white knight.”
“Oh, it’s okay, Brian.” Cinnamon has already pulled out what looks to be her last sandwich and is slicing into it with her dagger, a blush on her cheeks.
“Brian, huh? Pretty frikkin weird name for a Drow.” The fairy snorts. “What’s your House name?”
“You mean like a last name?”
“Yes.” She says it slow and condescendingly.
“Brantly” I sigh. She's really starting to grate on my nerves now.
“Brantly?” She rolls my name in her mouth like it tasted sour, “Well, that’s certainly no better is it?”
“I like it.” Cinnamon says while offering a near quarter of her last sandwich to the rude fairy and another half to me. She shoots me her closed-eyed smile and I feel a bit of my annoyance ebb.
“Figures” The fairy shakes her head and takes the offered meal. It looks like she is on some kind of ‘Americas most ridiculous food’ shows. The one’s where a single glutton attempts to eat a burger the size of a car tire, or a stack of pancakes that requires a pitchfork. And for some reason, it offends me.
“Hey?” She pokes about in the sandwich with a grimace. “Where’s the meat?”
The narrative has been taken without permission. Report any sightings.
“Oh, umm. I don’t eat meat.” Cinnamons ears droop.
“Then you must be the chef then. Right, Too Tall?” She dismissively sets the sandwich down on the rock next to her. "Why don’t you whip us up some decent grub.”
A pang of guilt hits me in my chest and I sheepishly avoid Cinnamons glance. Funny, as delicious as the roasted snake had tasted, just the thought of it now soured my stomach. The way the fairy was turning up her nose toward Cinnis lovingly offered food made me want to snatch it away from her and tell her how much she didn’t deserve it.
“So? How about it?" The fairy asks.
“We better not. That thing came around when I did.” I keep my eyes locked onto the fairy. “We don’t want any other foul things making their way into camp tonight.” If she caught my thinly veiled innuendo she pays it absolutely no mind whatsoever.
“Nah. With its scent all over this place." The fairy waves a hand then leans on her knees. "Believe me, we won’t be troubled by any other beasties. That’s for sure.”
“I guess I can do it.” Cinnamon says opening the bag of uncooked snake meat. The look that washes over her face I can tell she is disgusted at the thought.
“Cinnamon, you don’t need to go through the trouble. It’s late and you hardly got any rest.”
“But she’s our guest, Brian.” An almost hurt look crosses her face at the thought of disappointing the twelve-inch nuisance.
“Fine.” I manage to hold in the sigh, “You go and relax, Cinni. I’ll fix some up food for our... guest.”
“All right! Now that’s what I’m talking about.” She rubs her little hands together greedily. “And don’t go and scrimp on me, Too Tall.”
I fill my mouth with a huge bite from my sandwich to keep my tongue occupied and start to collect the discarded kabob sticks. For an instant I’m tempted to just wash off some of the dirt-encrusted already cooked meat and offer it to her but, I refrain. Instead I wrap it up in a few strips of cloth to dispose of later then set about cleaning off some new chunks in the creek.
“Bookmark that one right there for me.” She says pointing to the largest hunk near the middle of a stick as I set them over the fire.
“So. I guess you don’t have any food of your own?”
“Huh? Yeah, of course I do.” She pauses then pats her wet clothes with a suck of her teeth. “Well, I did. I think it’s back in his stomach actually.” She nods at the dead dino.
“What happened?” Cinnamon asks while fixing her bedroll.
“I’d set up camp up in a rather cozy tree, was having a nice snooze till that scent wafted by.” She sniffs the air at the growing smell of my cooking. “Woke me right out of my sleep. So, I figured that I’d just pop around and beg a bite. I was trying to find where it was coming from but that Drayger got the jump on me. Lucky for him he gobbled me up before I could put up a fight.”
I scoff at her bravado, but then again, fairy’s did usually posess inate magical abilities. Though I highly doubted that it would be any sort of match for that thing.
“Gosh. The same thing happened to me.”Cinnamons ears shoot up, “A nasty Naga bit me and was going to eat me.” She nods to me with her closed eye smile. “But Brian saved me too.”
“Easy there, Ears.” She holds up a hand. “Let’s not go throwing that ‘saved’ word around so freely, yeah? I appreciate the ‘assist’ and all, but I’d have been alright.”
“Sure.” I say with a bit more of a laugh than I'd intended.
“What was that?” The fairy shoots me a glare that could cut diamonds.
“Oh, no. Nothing at all.”
“I don’t think Brian meant anything. It’s just that the forest can be dangerous.” Cinnamons voice sounded meek. “Actually maybe we should all stick together? You know for protection.”
“You think I’m some newborn sproutling? Some kind of child? I don’t need no damn protection, especially from a couple better lucky than good odd balls like you two.”
“Oh yeah, you made that perfectly clear by the way you got eaten.” I laugh fed up with her attitude.
“Brian! That’s not very nice.” Cinnamon scolds, “Put yourself in her place. She’s just a gentle little fairy.”
“What!?” The fairy jumps up explosively.
“Well, it’s just that umm everything is so much bigger than you.” Cinnamons ears droop a little, “I can’t imagine how scary that must be.”
“Why you condescending...” Her wings shake in fury, “Listen up, rodent! I would come over there and slap you stupid but since its obvious someone beat me to it--”
“Alright, that’s it!” With a slap of my knees I stand from my log seat. Anger boils in my gut at her insult and the shocked and hurt expression on Cinnamons face.
“Oh? You want to step to me, big man? You feeling froggy?” She stomps towards me pointing one teeny finger and I can’t help but let out a chortle mirth at the little woman. Good! She’s been nothing but rude and offensive. Let her fume and have a big ol’ spoonful of her own medicine.
“I think it’s time for you to go.” I say sternly and point out into the darkness.
“Or what?”
“Look, shorty.” I say, not exactly sure what I plan on doing. However, now committed, I take an aggressive step toward her.
Drow-sense tingling!
She launches toward me like a blur, tearing across the short distance with her little legs pumping and a buzz of her wings. In an instant both of my feet go out from under me and the back of my head smacks on my sitting log. Through vision white with pain I blink in shock and see the little Barbie is above me, flying down with a hatchet kick toward my face, lightning-like magenta energy trailing behind her tiny foot.
Letting out a frightened pre-pubescent sounding squeal I roll to the side then scramble to my feet as the log shatters where my head had been a scant second before.
Bits of splinted wood form a cloud of debris and she jumps toward me, scattering a circle of dust in a wash of speed.
Instinctively I whip out with a backhand and she blocks it somehow, rolling over my wrist and running along my forearm to launch from my bicep.
Unlocked: General Combat Action: STRIKE!
Her tiny fist connects with my jaw and the impact feels like I've been slapped across the side of my face with a brick. I go down to the ground again, more stars spinning. I push through the haze and see Cinnamon has, quite literally, jumped to my defense. Flying toward the diminutive creature with a kick and forcing a cease to my assault.
Stun exceeded Vitality: Condition: Stunned
My head is throbbing and my legs feel like wet noodles. I want to get up but my body refuses.
Brian Status: HP: 8 / 12 Stun: 2 / 22 Mana: 4 / 10
I struggle to get my feet under me but instead fall onto my side and roll onto my back. I have to catch my breath, just for a few seconds.
Recovery: 6
Brian Status: HP: 8 / 12 Stun: 8 / 22 Mana: 4 / 10
Condition: No longer Stunned
I glance over and see Cinnamon still engaged with the fairy. With a shove I stagger and finally stand. My hand moves toward my gun but I pause, unable to draw. I don’t think I could bring myself to actually shoot her. The other things I’ve encountered were monsters plain and simple. But this little fairy is different. Sure she was twelve inches tall, and abrasive as twenty grit sandpaper but she looked and acted, well... human.
Cinnamon is still putting up a good show, ducking and shifting away from the energy flashes of the fairy’s blows, though she too looks she is fighting a losing battle. Then the fairy lets loose with a tiny yell and slams her fists together.
There’s a resounding bang and even though I’m a good ten feet away my ears pop from the small sonic boom.
Fairy uses Special Ability: Thunder Clap.
So close, engaged in melee, Cinnamons reaction is much more extreme. The wail of pain that rips from her makes my heart leap into my throat as she drops to her knees, grabbing at her ears with both hands.
“Cinni!” I hurtle forward. Snatching a branch from close to the campfire I swing it like a club.
It cracks into the fairy’s back like a Louisville slugger hitting a home run. I tense involuntarily as she skips like a stone across the ground, afraid I may have killed her.
I quickly see my concern isn’t warranted as she turns her momentum into an acrobatic roll, sliding to a stop. Her feet and one hand digging tiny furrows in the earth while the other balls into a fist.
“Not bad, Buttercup.” She fires back at us like a bullet and I swear I see a gleam in her molten, magenta colored eyes and a tiny smile plastered on her face.
I blow to dodge and the little missile streaks past but quickly reorients with a flick and buzz of her tiny wings, circling back on another attack run. Using my branch I fend off a series of punches and spinning kicks, stumbling backward as she swoops about like a hummingbird, keeping me off balance.
Unlocked: General Combat Action: BLOCK!
Guts twisted in fear, sweat dampening my forehead I block another teeny fist, my branch now splintered and cracked from multiple hits. Clarity comes to me in a sudden wave. She is toying with me. Humiliating me like so many others have done before.
In an instant my fear shifts to pure determination. Filled with rage, I grit my teeth and go on the offensive. Launching into a series of wild swings with my broken bat. The fairy gives ground as I shout and cry out my fury. Darting about she doesn’t bother blocking but then after a particularily wide swing she charges forward to deliver a painful chop to my fingers that sends my club tumbling away from me. Shocked I take another swing but I miss by a mile as she drops straight down the ground and once more shears my feet from under me.
I land on my face this time, eating dirt and leaves. Spitting loam from my mouth I roll over onto my back trying not to make myself an easy target. The fairy lands on my chest, smirking as she draws back a fingernail-sized fist.
“Buh-bye, Brantly.”
The punch doesn’t come. Instead she spins around to slap an arrow from the air, sending it flying off to thunk and quiver into a tree.
Fairy uses Special Ability: Projectile Deflection
The fairy’s attention is focused on Cinnamon as she reaches into her quiver for another arrow. Using the distraction I search about frantically. Discarded on the ground my fingers grasp one of the now empty pouches that had contained my snake meat.
In one smooth motion, I bring it around, scoop the fairy inside and zip the draw string closed. Twirling it about I slam the bag into the ground with a satisfying thwump.
“That's how you want to play? Wait till I get out of here!” I can hear her firing off more muffled threats and a sprinkling of colorful curses as she buzzes about inside the bag like a fly in a empty soda bottle.
Holding the leather prison down with one hand I draw my pistol right as her tiny head pops out from a ratty hole in the pouch. I phunk my gun barrel squarely over her head, pinning her to the ground and plugging the end of the weapon with her face like a cork in a bottle.
“Hey!” I shout, “Enough!” I cock back the hammer to drive my point home. I’m not positive I can actually go ahead and splatter the little dynamos melon, but the aches and pains in my body and swollen jaw has tinged my words with enough rage that I hope she sees the threat as very real.
Presence Attack vs Fairy + Bonus: Incredibly Violent Threat: Success!
Cinnamon, obviously no longer playing with the tiny fist fighter either steps close, drawing her arrow back to point down at the pinned fairy. One ear is still flat against her back and she has a grimace on her face, but it appears that she has nearly fully recovered.
The fairy struggles for a brief moment then goes quiet. As I hold her down I hear what sounds like laughter echo from inside my gun barrel.
Wary of what she might be up to I slide the barrel down from the fairy’s head but keep it pressed to the bag and against her chest.
“Okay, Okay! Point to you both.” The fairy wriggles a little and then her arms slide up and out the same hole her head popped through. She holds them up in a surrendering motion for a few seconds then leans her little forearms over the end of my gun barrel.
“Guess you two aren’t as pathetic as I thought.” She glances past my shoulder to Cinnamon then back to me, “Well now. I figure we’ve all worked up a bit of an appetite with that tumble. I know I did.” She licks her lips and glances toward the campfire.”So how ‘bout that food?”
“Are you frigging kidding me!?” I glare at her with as much venom as I can muster. “You think were all gonna sit down and share a snack after the crap you just pulled, Tinkerbelle?”
“Please," she rolls her eyes, "if you were going to pull that trigger you’d have done it by now.” She then taps the barrel with a double knock of her knuckles. "Besides, I think you and I both know that if I wanted to I could make you eat this gun."
I glance at Cinnamon who gives me a little shrug.
“And by the way, Brian? Since you are so particular about names. Mine ain’t Tinkerbelle.” She leans forward and even with her body pinned beneath my hand cannon her words drip with attitude.
“It’s Kryst Thunderfist.”