The energetic sound coming from Croon’s accordion filled the hall with what Kedryn would loosely describe as music. It was clear their Verser didn’t know the first thing about rhythm or melody, but what he lacked in talent he more than made up for in enthusiasm.

“In the caverns deep, where the shadows creep,

Dwarves were drinking in their rocky keep!

But along came some spiders, with legs so lanky,

But the ale we done drunk made us dwarves really quite swanky!”

Everyone, including the queen, winced as the dwarf’s off-key voice increased in volume. Kedryn agreed with the other dwarves. Croon couldn’t carry a tune if he had a bucket to haul it in.

The chorus was even worse.

“Hey, ugly spider, yer the talk o’ the cave,

With a face that would put yer poor Mum in the grave!

We'll face you with mockery, laughter and cheer,

From a spider so ugly, we’ve nothin to fear!”

You have been exposed to a Verser’s Song of Disenchantment. Removes debuffs such as fear, charm, confusion, disorient, and any love based feelings that might have brought you a modicum of joy. Draws all enemies and potential lovers to the Verser like a Corporeal Mage’s Taunt spell; they want nothing more than to destroy him. Motivates all parties considered friendly to continue fighting, likely to shut this particular Verser’s mouth as soon as possible.

Attention! Fear and Anxiety debuffs have been removed by the Verser’s Song of Disenchantment. Courage increased by a factor of 3.

Kedryn’s eyes opened wide as his feelings of inadequacy and fear evaporated like smoke in the wind. For the first time since the queen’s mental assault, he could think straight!

The queen halted her advance on Glade as the song grated over her with all the subtlety of a wire brush. Slowly, she turned her head toward the dwarf playing the accordion and gave him a look that could only be described as indignant hostility.

Croon smiled wider, then gave the spider a wink.

“Then along came their fat queen, who got stuck at the door,

she stumbled and bumbled then fell to the floor!

Her eyes be all askew, and she has a really large belly,

Even us dwarves think she’s rather quite smelly!”

The spider queen shook with rage as Croon again sang the chorus. The dwarves laying comatose sat up. Likewise, those who had run stopped in their tracks. Everyone listened to a voice that could best be described as a prepubescent turkey who smoked 5 packs of cigarettes a day.

And was dying of pneumonia.

“He really is awful,” Kedryn mumbled, gripping his staff as he carefully watched the spider queen. The last thing he wanted was to disrupt Croon’s attempts at taunting their eight legged guest away from Glade and the others. He only hoped the song would be enough to stop any further mental assaults.

“This be one o’ his better songs, to tell ye the truth,” Gird winced. “Still, a cat in heat yammering all night has more talent.”

Attention! A mental assault by the Lesser Astral Spider Queen has failed due to the ongoing use of Croon’s Song of Disenchantment.

Kedryn blinked away the notification with a smile. Either Croon’s voice was too distracting or the Verser's abilities were more powerful. Either way, the queen’s abilities were neutralized.

Croon, started on the next verse. Before he could even get out the first stanza, the queen shrieked with rage and charged.

Without missing a beat, Croon turned tail and ran, belting the song over his shoulder with a massive grin.

“Hey you great ugly spider, we be singin with glee,

Your appearance don't scare us, most definitely not me!

With a body so bulky, and a face so sour,

You'll be the punchline for the next hour!”

Stolen from Royal Road, this story should be reported if encountered on Amazon.

Kedryn acted the moment the queen moved. He sprinted until he was behind and to her right. As distracted as she was, the spider didn’t notice him until it was too late. Wringing his mana pool for all he could, Kedryn cast spark and paid the 8 mana amplification cost through his new weapon. At the same moment he swung the Cinderwood staff at the queen’s back with every ounce of strength he had left.

An explosion of fire and concussive force erupted from the point of impact, shattering one of the queen’s back legs. Pieces of crystalline exoskeleton mixed with bluish white ichor splattered over him as the amplified blow knocked the spider against the wall.

Kedryn gasped in shock as he too was blown back, the staff flying from his numbed hands as the unexpected backlash spun him to the ground.

Critical Hit! You have partially crippled the Lesser Astral Spider Queen by inflicting 61 points of mixed concussive, fire, and bludgeoning damage.

Warning! You have taken -14 points of concussive damage. You have lost all feeling in your hands due to lack of sufficient skill with the Quarter Staff. Numbness will last for the next 28 seconds. Any use of your hands during this time will result in a -78% efficiency until the debuff has elapsed.

Kedryn dismissed his prompts as the queen screamed in pain. In moments, several other dwarves charged in, taking advantage of the spider's momentary distraction.

“Not the best time for a nap, boyo!!” Krazzik yelled as he ran past Kedryn, a glowing brown club raised in his one good arm. “BRING THE HAMMER!”

Krazzik struck the leg segment next to the one Kedryn had crippled. The dwarven chief’s Sundering Strike shattering both his club and the spider’s leg he had aimed for.

Again, the queen screamed, fighting through agonizing pain to push herself away from the annoying Verser to confront the real threat.

“Yer looks, dear spider, are beyond compare,

Why, you'd even make a goblin stare!

With yer eight…”

Croon paused for a moment, counting how many legs the spider had left.

“I mean six legs so hairy,

You'd even make an abyssal demon wary!

The queen’s cry of pain turned into a growl as it lunged at Croon, who simply skipped away as three dwarves with spears stepped in, jabbing their weapons at the spider’s face.

Another dwarf rushed in with a glowing pickaxe.

“STORM THE WALLS!” The other dwarf roared their clan’s refrain, slamming his mana charged weapon between the joints of the Spider’s two remaining legs on that side of her body.

The queen’s scream changed to a wail of pain, the legs on her right side collapsing useless to the ground.

Kedryn pushed himself to his feet where he found Glade gripping the cinderwood staff.

“Time to finish this,” he growled, his eyes locked onto the large spider. Then he handed the staff to Kedryn. “Do you have another one of those hits in you?”

“I’m down to… 3 MP left,” Kedryn panted before Croon interrupted.

“I got ye covered!”

The tune Croon was playing abruptly changed from a mocking jig to... something a bit more serious.

It still sounded horrible.

In halls o’ stone, where hammers ring,

Our ancient kin lay proud and strong,

Beneath the earth, where treasures gleam,

Dwarven hearts beat a steadfast song.

You have been exposed to a Verser’s Song of Fortitude. Increases health, mana, and stamina by 20 points each for all allies for the duration of the song. Reduces all health, mana, and stamina by 10 points for all enemies. Extended exposure to this specific Verser’s music will result in tone deafness and paranoia.

The dwarves cheered, redoubling their efforts as they too joined in, drowning out Croon’s voice.

"Dig deep, forge strong, in caverns wide,

The Three and Five remain our strength, our guide!

Mountain's children, embraced by Mother’s light,

We be united as one to face the night."

Kedryn couldn’t help but laugh as he saw his stats increase. He grabbed the staff from Glade’s hands and gave him a massive grin.

“I am now sir!” Then he was running. The dwarves opened a path to the queen at Glade’s command.

Kedryn flew, his increased dexterity making the distance inconsequential. Even as the queen lashed out with her remaining foreleg, the Kid simply ducked to the side as he swung his staff like a golf club toward the spider’s now exposed head.

Instead of pushing the maximum mana he could through the staff, Kedryn dropped one amplification level. He hadn’t forgotten what had happened the last time.

A smaller explosion caught the spider queen just under the chin, the force and heat searing away both crystalline mandibles and the sensitive skin underneath.

Instead of fighting the blast wave, Kedryn reversed his momentum, swinging the staff in the opposite direction as he again cast Spark through the staff.

A second explosion connected on top of the queen’s head, vaporizing a quarter of the monster’s face as the force drove the spider queen into the ground.

A hushed moment of silence filled the hall as everyone watched. The queen quivered once, then let out a sigh.

You have defeated 1 x level 19 Lesser Astral Spider Queen…

The room filled with cheers.