I was at a bit of a loss. Almost three full days had passed since I ran away from home, with the sun setting on day three. I scratched my head, or to be more specific, Hans scratched my head. I could only guess what was happening with our pursuers, but I had a couple of clues.
My first clue was the lone zombie we left behind in the tower. It wasn’t in our party any longer and was most likely dead. Based on the timing of its disappearance, I guessed that the [Enforcer] was to blame. Cordelia had said that it would kill anything that got in its way, so maybe it was just destroying every zombie in sight.
The second clue was the sun up above. I had seen it for the first time in my life when the storm overhead dissipated yesterday afternoon. In hindsight, I shouldn’t have stared at the blinding ball of fire for quite as long, but the white spots in my vision were barely noticeable any more. The end of the unending storm meant something had disrupted the ritual, and that probably meant the adventurers had looted the storm crystal.
I was a little peeved that I hadn’t thought to grab the crystal myself; I had literally been within a few meters of it, but it was probably for the best. If I had taken everything worth stealing, then the adventurers might have come after me. Hopefully, they would be easily distracted by shiny things, and wouldn’t worry too much about my master being dead before they arrived. If they found the treasures in Voulos’ vault, then I was confident they wouldn’t care about the few items I took off his corpse.
If either the enforcer or the adventurers came after me, they would have to travel through the forest, which was easier said than done. The dark woods were not as deserted as they first appeared. Creatures only showed on my minimap if they weren’t actively hiding or obscured by the system. So naturally, a haunted forest was filled with things that didn't register unless we almost tripped over them.
I had seen spectral wolves appear out of thin air; a corrupted tree broke its camouflage to scratch its roots; and I had even encountered a putrid zombified ogre. The first two caught me by surprise, but the ogre practically walked into us. Sadly, the system wouldn’t let me invite it to my party, and my usual methods of recruitment didn’t work.
It wasn’t the friendly abominations of the forest that were bothering me. My current dilemma was that we had travelled far enough away from the black tower that the haunted woods had given way to the base of the mountains. We had spent the morning walking on an incline. It was initially a gentle slope, but it had gradually become steeper. How long were we going to flee this angel? As tireless undead, we could technically march forever, but constantly walking into the unknown wasn’t a good idea.
The mountain was daunting, casting a vast shadow on the world below from the setting sun. More than the mountains themselves, I worried about what was inside them. I had a hazy picture of the local geography from my conversations with Voulos and knew that the mountains near his tower were occupied. We were approaching goblin territory.
Voulos had alluded to some kind of protection deal he had with them; it was how he had a ready supply of goblin blood for my blood baths, and where he got target practice for my [Chilling Gaze]. Perhaps the goblins would recognise me as a minion of Voulos, and grant us passage. I wasn’t optimistic.
What I remembered from my previous life about goblins wasn’t good. They bred like rabbits, fought like wolverines, and were harder to get rid of than cockroaches. Goblins were highly territorial and incredibly prone to violence. The green swarm was unlikely to be as zombie-friendly as the woodland undead.
“What do we do?” I asked over our party chat.
“Fight. Me grab, Bob go boom. Angel dies.” Abs was overeager, but her blighted heart was in the right place. It wasn’t a terrible plan: combining the strength of her [Death Grip] with the power of Bob’s corpse explosion was a solid tactic.
“No! Plan bad. Boom is bad!” Bob interjected. She had become a little selfish since we boosted her intelligence. She was our lead bomber; blowing up was literally her job. Even her name was supposed to be ‘Bomb’, but perhaps I had confused her when I misspelt it.
“We can use other bombers.” I said, compromising with her.
“Yes! Good plan. Boom is good! Abs and bomber stay fight, rest run.” Bob eagerly pushing another bomber zombie to take her place.
It wasn’t the first time we were having some variation of this argument. Bob wanted to run away and avoid fighting forever. Abs wanted to attack anything and everything all the time. Hans had a tendency to side with whatever I said, and Ghost either abstained or went against me just to be annoying. Until now, I had been happy to keep running, but I wasn’t sure anymore.
With that in mind, I decided it was finally time to call our march to a halt. I herded the horde into a well-placed cave Ghost had scouted earlier. The cave was sizeable, empty except for a few bats, and most importantly, was almost invisible until you got up close. The horde would be safe inside, and I could take some time to figure out my next move.
I had to assume that the [Enforcer] was still coming for me. The issue was that I didn’t have any idea what kind of abilities, skills, or traits it had. To answer that, I would have to lure Cordelia out of her flask and tell me what she knew. I left Abs and Bob to argue over the party chat, and asked Hans to take me somewhere we could be alone.
When we arrived at a secluded outcropping, Hans brought out the flask containing Cordelia and placed it on the floor. I hadn’t tried to talk to her since the first night we were on the run. She had stubbornly stayed in her flask no matter how many times I called her out, so Hans put the flask in a pocket, and I forgot about her.
I was counting on a few things to draw her out of hiding. Enough time had passed that her guard was most likely down. Resisting the summons took effort on her part; if I caught her unaware, she would have less time to react. I was also banking on her curiosity getting the better of her. She was a self-described gossip, and she must be wondering what happened.
It was time to wake the ghost.
“Spirianum eres viatum, spirit come out. Oi! Shit of brains! Gompta! Dompfast! Did you hear? Coward! Spirianum eres viatum! Kunya! Spirit, come out!” Hans shouted at the silver flask. He repeated the summoning phrase several times, and in between the arcane words I fed him all the curse words Cordelia had taught me.
It took a few minutes, but eventually I saw her white frothy essence leaking from the flask. Once her phantom body had formed, we glared at each other for a few moments. She floated through the air like driftwood, and her aura had the decency to at least look embarrased.
“So… I’m not sure if I should be proud or ashamed of your colourful vocabulary.” She said to break the ice.
“I remember it good: shit for brains.” I clicked back at her. It had been a couple of days since our last language lesson, so my timing was a little rusty, but I was pretty sure I had clicked the goblin swear word correctly. Her [Omnispeech] would work even if I fluffed a click here or there.
“I… yea, I guess I could have handled that better. I take it you survived. I mean, obviously you did, but… is the [Enforcer] dead then?” She nervously asked.
“No, I ran.” I replied. Upon realising the [Enforcer] was still out there somewhere, Corderlia looked around nervously before refocusing on me.
“But… how though?” She asked.
“I don’t know. You know more.” I clicked in what I hoped passed for an accusing tone.
Cordelia took a moment to collect herself, and the anxious bubbling of her essence cooled as the more calm and collected [Diplomat] reasserted herself.
“It is true. I know more than most about them. [Enforcers] are how the system punishes rule-breakers in general. I actually have an ability that can summon them.” She explained.
“What! No! No more!” I said. I readied Hans to kick her flask off the mountain.
“Don’t worry Zed, I can’t summon them at will, nor would I if I could. Do you remember that I was a [Diplomat] when I was alive?”
“Yes.” I replied. She brought it up constantly in the stories of her glory days.
“Well, [Diplomat] is a class you can take if you break into the bronze tier. One of the core class abilities is [Contract]. [Diplomats] do a lot of small scale negotiations, as well as larger treaties between nations. The ability makes a willingly signed contract official, as far as the system is concerned. If a signatory breaks the contract, it triggers an [Enforcer] spawning.” She let her explanation sink in.
I knew Cordelia as a grumpy old teacher who swore too much, but she was also a thousand year old ghost who kept humanity safe while the dragons and giants killed each other. Despite all the stories she told, I still sometimes forgot the impact her life had on the world.
“One of the contracts I officiated quite early in my career was with a frost giant called Thymir. When she broke the deal, an angel called Relar spawned to take care of him. He was charming, intense, and a little dark. Young love blinded me to the sociopathy that lurked underneath.” She said, as her essence took on the dark blue of regret.
Romance was not something I understood, nor particularly cared about. Undead generally don’t procreate, so such feelings are a waste of time.
“How win? What abilities?” I pressed her.
“I don’t really know, I’m afraid. Angels in their true forms don’t have sheets like mortals or monsters do. When they spawn, they create their mortal vessel from scratch, to suit the purpose for which they were called. I think that's part of why Relar saw all of this, down here, as some kind of game where nothing really matters.” She said with sadness.
This conversation was still not very helpful.
“And?”
“Well… I know that all [Enforcers] get flight from one of their racial traits. It shouldn’t have really taken them more than a couple of hours to catch up to you. When Thymir broke the contract, the system painted a literal bullseye on her forehead. That made it pretty easy for Relar to keep track of her.”
“Red paint?” I asked, something catching in the back of my brain.
“Yes actually. That was how you knew someone had an enforcer coming after them. It’s hard to hide red paint on your forehead after all.”
“Not hands?”
“No, why?”
“I have red hands.”
“You don’t have hands.”
“On sheet, says [Red-Handed].”
“Oh, interesting. Do you mind if I have a look?”
“How?”
“[Show of Faith]. It’s a [Diplomat] ability that lets me exchange details with a willing target.”
“Ok.” I agreed, and her sheet appeared in my mind.
Cordelia the ‘Polyglot of Peace’
18:40, 24th of Iosi, 1465 3A
Total Level: 25 (Iron)
Levels: 10 Official, 10 Diplomat, 5 Ambassador
Experience: 24,278,600 / 24,278,600
Type: Spirit (N/A)
Attributes:
Resources:
Dexterity: 10
Stamina: N/A
Strength: 10
Power: N/A
Vitality: 10
Health: N/A
Wisdom: 12
Willpower: N/A
Intelligence: 14
Mana: N/A
Charisma: 35
Soul: N/A
Affinities: N/A
The story has been taken without consent; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.
Titles:
Peacemaker: +1 Charisma, you gain an additional +2 Charisma when out of combat.
Polyglot: +1 Charisma, +1 Intelligence, you learn new languages faster the more languages you are currently fluent in. Currently fluent in 62 languages.
Silver Tongue (Inactive): +1 Charisma, you are more persuasive.
Gossip (Inactive): +1 Charisma, you discover secrets more easily, but are also more prone to accidentally revealing them.
Traits:
Ghost: Replaces all previous racial traits, makes character incorporeal, does not use any resources and can’t physically interact with the mortal world.
Diplomat: +2 Charisma.
Ambassador: +2 Charisma, +1 Intelligence.
Skills:
Burning Ears: +1 Wisdom, You sense when your name is spoken, and from which direction.
Court Advisor: +1 Charisma, +1 in a chosen attribute to a chosen member of the court.
Omnispeech: +1 Charisma, All spoken languages within earshot are translated into system common.
Truthsense: +1 Charisma, Lies ring hollow to your ears.
Diplomatic Immunity: +1 Charisma, Can’t be targeted by hostile abilities directly or indirectly. If you use a hostile ability this skill will be disabled for a year.
Abilities:
Whisper - Copper:
No Cost
No Cooldown
Whisper directly into the ear of a known target within 35 meters.
Pinky Vow - Iron - Level 5:
50 Soul
No Cooldown
+1 Charisma, Binds a target to a promise they make while grasping pinkies together, dealing 52 psychic damage each time they break it.
Redacted (Unavailable):
-
-
-
Redacted (Unavailable):
-
-
-
Redacted (Unavailable, Elite):
-
-
-
Contract - Bronze:
No Cost
No Cooldown
A contract between two willing parties targeted by this ability is recognised as official. Only one [Contract] may be created at a time by this ability.
Obliterate Tensions - Iron- Level 5:
350 Soul
5 Minute Cooldown
+1 Charisma, Erases negative emotions of all creatures in a 27 meter range.
Show of Faith - Bronze:
No Cost
No Cooldown
View a willing target’s character sheet in exchange for sharing your own.
Telepathic Link - Iron - Level 5:
50 Soul / Second
5 Minute Cooldown
+1 Charisma, Creates a telepathic link with a willing target within 34 meters.
Empathy - Iron - Level 5 (Elite):
100 Soul
No Cooldown
+1 Charisma, Sense emotions of a target if your charisma beats their will. Undetectable when in use.
Mental Fortress - Iron:
10 Soul / Second
No Cooldown
Makes you immune to mental effects.
Embassy Hop - Iron - Level 5:
750 Soul
No Cooldown
Instantly travel to a friendly embassy.
Cease Fire - Iron - Level 5 (Elite):
500 Soul / Second
1 Day Cooldown
Disables combat abilities in a 17 meter range.
I was barely past reading Cordelia’s name on the page when she started talking.
“Ok, so I think I know what’s happening, and it's good news for you. Divination magic works best the more specific your query is. The system marked you with red hands, but you left your hands back with the rest of your body. Losing your body might be the luckiest thing that could have happened to you!” She said with a laugh.
I frowned. The day I lost my body was the day I became self-aware. Before that, I had been no different from any of the brainless zombies in my horde. Despite that, it was hard to consider my current lack of body situation to be a good thing.
Picking up on my troubled thoughts, Cordelia clarified.
“What I mean is that if a divination ability targeted a zombie with system-marked red hands, it could pinpoint their location from a great distance. If I asked someone to find me a person, or zombie without that marker to go on, it becomes a lot less accurate, especially if the target is far away or shielded in some manner. It would bombard the user with false positives. Divination is actually pretty useless most of the time.” She said with a wry smile.
“Is that why…” I began, but was interrupted.
“Holy shit Zed! You’re a king! As in an actual king! Why didn’t you lead with that!?” She exploded in eagerness.
“I did. I changed name first, then kill Voulos.”
“Not what I meant! You should have told me. I mean, who else are you going to make your chancellor?”
“My… what?” I asked, confused.
“As in the councillor that advises you on diplomatic matters? Have you even opened up the kingdom interface?” She asked incredulously.
“No.”
“Oh my goddess. Seriously?”
“Busy not dying.” I said, deadpan.
Truthfully, I had forgotten about the kingdom that came with my king title. Given my low intelligence score, my memory was better than it had any right to be, but it was nowhere near perfect. There were only so many balls I could juggle with no hands. From Cordelia’s reaction, it seemed to be a big deal, but how was I supposed to know that?
With a slightly worrying glint in her eyes, Cordelia approached me to put her arm round Hans’ shoulder.
“You are in luck, my naïve student. With a kingdom at your back, you may actually stand a chance against this angel. Let me tell you all about the benefits of a well-organized state, and the importance of having a good chancellor.”
Zed's end of chapter sheet:
King Zed ‘The Red’
18:44, 24th of Iosi, 1465 3A
Total Level: 1 (Copper)
Levels: Overseer 1
Experience: 97/100
Type: Overseer Zombie (C)
Attributes:
Resources:
Dexterity: 6
Stamina: N/A
Strength: 13
Power: N/A
Vitality: 15
Health: 30/30
Wisdom: 5
Willpower: 10/10
Intelligence: 5
Mana: 10/10
Charisma: 10
Soul: 20/20
Decay: 24% (Stage 0)
Affinities: Nether (100%), Poison (50%), Fire (-25%), Holy (-100%)
Titles:
King of the Braindead: Access to Kingdom subsystem.
Red-Handed: +1 Intelligence, sets alignment as evil, hands are permanently dyed red.
Traits:
Made to Serve: +1 Intelligence, +1 Charisma. Understands system common, and the primary language of its creator (Orcish). Can follow simple commands based on the creator's intelligence divided by 10 (3 words long). Gives access to a portion of the knowledge contained within the host brain, better preserved brains retain more information.
Flesh Construct: Sustained by nether magic, does not need to eat, drink, sleep or breath. Does not regenerate Health. Does not use Stamina or Might, but instead uses Decay.
Overseer: +2 Charisma.
Not Braindead: +1 Wisdom, +1 Intelligence and +2 Charisma.
Skills:
First skill gained at level 5
Abilities:
Unarmed Strike - Copper - Level 1 (Unavailable):
0% Decay
1 Second Cooldown
Strikes at the target with an unarmed limb for 5 bludgeoning damage.
Dash Attack - Bronze- Level 1 (Restricted):
0% Decay
5 Second Cooldown
Dashes to a target within 3 meters for 9 bludgeoning damage with a chance to push back or knock over the target.
Poisoned Bite - Bronze - Level 2 (Restricted):
0% Decay
5 Second Cooldown
+1 Vitality and Bites the target for 9 piercing damage and a further 8 poison damage over the next 30 seconds.
Enrage Zombie - Bronze - Level 4 (Restricted):
50 Soul
No Cooldown
The user lets out a rage-filled shout at a target zombie to increase its Strength, Dexterity, and Vitality by +5 for 50 seconds.
Overseer’s Aura - Bronze - Level 3 (Restricted):
1 Soul / Second
No Cooldown
+1 Strength to all zombies within 13 meters.
Corpse Explosion - Steel - Level 2 (Restricted):
200 Mana
20 Second Cooldown
Explodes the targeted corpse to deal damage equal to the health it had when alive in a 2m radius. Any corpses in the range of the explosion have a 25% chance to explode as if targeted by this ability.
Attunements (3/0):
Ring of the Jester (Cursed): +2 Charisma but curses the wearer with [Jester’s Curse].
Princess Tiara: +3 Charisma and makes the wearer more attractive to Princes.
Intellect Ring: +1 Intelligence.
Status Effects:
Jester’s Curse: The target is cursed by the jester. The curse can only be lifted by a Sphinx’s laugh.
Team-Killer (355 days remaining): -2 Charisma
Charisma Potion (11 minutes remaining): +1 Charisma