In total, fifty-six of my people were lost to the sea and another one hundred were left behind on NZ Island with no way of knowing the devastation that had befallen us. I helped build the bonfire memorial on the beach and mourned alongside mothers, brothers, sisters, sons, and daughters of the lost. The weight of these people's lives weighed more heavily on my soul now than it had before. We waited until the last ember had settled and finally flickered out before moving on from that place. Our arrival to our new home tasted bittersweet on the back of my tongue.

I sent scouts out into the surrounding area, looking for obvious signs of life in the area. It seems, though, that the beach we landed on was rather secluded and far from any other intelligent beings. The scout group returned with no news. So, I lead our people into the woodlands, away from the shore at first daybreak. My initial intentions were to make the trek to our homelands as a solid unit, all together. Obviously, that is no longer the best course of action due to our lack of manpower, literally. The elderly and children in this group were not going to be able to make the journey without more support than the able-bodied women, the few men who had made it on this trip, and the older children could provide. So, I followed my instincts.

My gut has never led me astray. I've been on the run, surviving alone, nearly my entire life. I know what I need to do in order to keep myself alive. Let's just hope that the same applies to this whole colony of people who are all suddenly looking for me to lead them as well. Right now, though, my gut is quite sure that we need to seek shelter within the woodlands and make camp. We will get those unable to make the journey at this time settled and accustomed to living within a small base settlement. Once that is done, I will talk to Stryker to come up with some sort of strategy for moving forward. For now, though? I put on a brave face.

After about a half day's walk into the forested area, we came across a rather large clearing with a pond of clean-looking fresh water. I sighed in relief at the sight and nodded to Stryker. This would do. This would be our base camp.

“Please halt! Those unable to physically help, please make yourselves comfortable around the shaded areas. All able-bodied persons please form lines here and here,” Stryker called out indicating a place before himself and me, “and we will assign you to small groups to begin building camp.”

“Thank you,” I whispered to the tall man beside me.

“It's my job, Princess,” Stryker only smirked as people began lining up before us.

Groups were assigned to collect firewood, collect shelter materials, collect fresh water, collect medicinal herbs, and hunt for food. Secondary groups were asked to begin building shelters, making meals, and assisting anyone who had ailments as supplies became available for use. The final group, the scout team from earlier, was sent out again. This time with the directive to only return once they had found some sign of civilization. That part made me feel uneasy but I trusted Stryker's judgment on the matter all the same.

Staying busy with setting up camp and making preparations helped me for a while to keep my mind off of worrying for my brother, but as things came together and calmed down for the night I found myself spiraling. I could only hope that this journey didn't mean losing the brother whom I had only just regained. I could also only hope that he did not think of us not returning for that group as abandonment. If I had my way, I'd have remained behind by his side. Being forced into a position of, I guess, royalty is definitely not as posh as one might assume.

As soon as those thoughts began to make a home inside my head, though, a cloud of black smoke and the wet slosh of displaced water rushing to the ground startled me. I choked on the smoke, covering my nose and coughing around it as it cleared. My mind took too long to catch up with my eyes because by the time I realized that I was in fact not hallucinating, my big brother was dragging me into a wet embrace. He must have brought at least ten gallons of sea water along with him.

“Lil K? Oh thank the gods, Little K! I just felt something was wrong. I didn't want to leave the others behind but I knew I had to get to you. Are you okay? Kasia?” Malakar spoke frantically even as the others from the camp began to crowd around us.

“I'm fine, Mal. Are you? How did you even get here? We are so far,” I murmured into his chest, still being held in a crushing embrace.

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“It was a very wet journey but tracking the group from the shipwreck was simple enough once I found it. I was so worried for you, sis,” Malaker said, finally pushing me back by the shoulders until our eyes met.

“What do we do? How do we get the others here?” I asked, low enough that the growing crowd could not hear.

“I left word with the first mate that he should procure a new vessel by any means necessary should I fail to return within two nights,” Malakar announced to the group as a whole, “So our loved ones should be arriving within the next four days to join us.”

I couldn't help but smile at that and smile even brighter as cheers rang through the camp around us. Of course, Malakar had thought of that. Of course, he was prepared. Malakar is the one who should truly be leading our people, after all, not me. I tugged his hand and pulled him away from the crowd before they could overwhelm him with questions. We joined Stryker near a small campfire and settled in.

“Oh, so you can stick to a plan once in a while after all, ay?” Stryker said by way of greeting and Malakar answered with a bark of laughter.

“Course I can, you ass,” Malakar huffed.

That exchange had me raising an eyebrow as I found a comfortable place to sit between my companions. My expression went unanswered though, so it quickly turned to a heavy glare at Stryker. After a few moments of intense eye contact, he huffed under his breath and looked away.

“We had a contingency plan set up. Mal was supposed to wait another day, though, until the ships were actually scheduled to be back before he came. Outside of that, this is within the expected possible outcomes. Part of serving you, and protecting you means always being prepared for whatever may happen,” Stryker explained grumpily.

“Maybe next time, I dunno, include me in the plan? But... Thanks,” I huffed right back.

Soon enough, the day of working and walking caught up to me, and my eyes fell heavily lidded. I felt a warm palm against my back and lulled my head to the side to look at Malakar. He smiled and gently guided me down to lie beside the fire.

“Rest, Lil K. We have a lot to take care of tomorrow,” Malakar said in a soothing voice.

The last thing I remember before drifting out of conscious thought was a firm determination that I would do everything possible to be the very best leader I can be. I fully intend to hold to that conviction in everything that I do going forward. No one will stop me from being the very best leader and protector of the people who risked everything to follow me here on a whim. Nothing will stop me from not only achieving my destiny but also surpassing and turning it on its head.

I suppose I wouldn't have passed out so carelessly if I'd had any idea what the next morning would bring. If i had known that only one member of my scout team would return from the mission and that they would be so gravely injured when they did, maybe I'd have stayed up all night searching for them instead. There just isn't a way to know for sure, but I do know I wouldn't have fallen into such a peaceful slumber if I had known what lay just beyond sunrise. That, I am sure of.

I told you all of that, my story up until now, so that you will understand how I got here. Maybe it will make sense to you, why I go forward on the path that I've chosen but maybe it won't. I can't make you see the world through my eyes. I can't give you the amount of injustice that I've suffered in my life. I can't force on you the trauma that I've suffered that brought us here. I can only tell you and hope that you see it. I hope you see that I am a woman who was forced to accept the responsibility of a kingdom and who has accepted that responsibility fully. I am a servant of my people, and my people only.

As I stand looking over the edge of a ravine that feels like an endless chasm, I want you to know that this journey was not my choice even though it has become my responsibility. I want you to know that all moves that I make are in the best interest of my people, not myself. I want you to understand that, although I may be the villain in many people's stories to come, I am just a woman trying to do her best. No matter the light that is shown on me nor the shadows cast at my back could ever explain to you what brought us to this moment. No amount of scorn or celebration from those around me or in my wake could convey the meaning I hope you now understand. Nothing that is to come was planned and I didn't ask for this role. I didn't ask for a kingdom to be thrust at my feet. Yet here I stand, overlooking the ruin and ash that will lead me to that very outcome.

Fire flickers below me in a ruined city. My troops, stronger than any force they had ever seen, detain the men. Women and children are allowed to remain free so long as they show no intent to pose a threat. Stryker stands at my right and Malakar at my left. The ash wafting through the air smells of charred flesh. Maybe you've grown to love me, maybe you want to continue this journey by my side right along with these brave men. If that's the case, though, be prepared for the onslaught of torment that I will lay against anyone who dares threaten harm to my people. Be prepared for the ruthless overtaking of these lands, which have rightfully belonged to my family for millennia. Be prepared to see the ugliest side of me on every step of this path, because today I have learned that will be what it takes to succeed.

The cries of separated families echo up the ravine as I make my way down the worn rock path. I scan the crowds, full of fear, and smile. This settlement made the mistake of killing my scouting party upon their arrival and I refuse to let something so heinous stand. Looking at the still-standing buildings and untouched farmlands around me, I wonder if those lives amounted to the worth of this town in its inhabitants' eyes. The hate reflects back at me when I stop before a man being relieved of his weapons answers that question.

“Raze it all to ash. Disable their fighters, and leave them to their mess. Our people were far more valuable than this pathetic settlement. They should consider this a mercy,” I tell Stryker with no venom in my voice, only a calm and cold surety.

“As you wish, my queen,” he answers.

I know, beyond a doubt, that in my story... In the version, I will tell and my children's children to come will tell... I am the hero. So don't put too much weight into what those who stood against me may claim in the future. You came this far, and listened to my story up to now, for a reason right? We all have our reasons, don't we? Are yours worth becoming a conqueror?