Allie tapped feverishly on Phoney, deep in flow of a conversation with Mack. Allie was falling in love again, and even Phoney, who was just a smart phone, started to notice. The ritual of little phrases of affection became regular enough that the predictive text feature anticipated most of them by now.

Allie: I’ll be thinking of you until the sun comes up.

Allie’s brow furrowed in annoyance; that was their sweet nothing, why did Phoney think it could take ownership of it? They grinned at Mack’s reply.

Mack: I’ll dream of you in the meantime.

They put Phoney on the charger and turned out their lamp. It was way past their bedtime, but that’s how things went in the blush of new love. They sleep-walked through work every day, having either been up way too late on a date with Mack, or up way too late texting with them.

Allie started to drift off but they couldn’t quite fall asleep because they were still bugged by the predictive text thing, but couldn’t figure out why. Technology was just like that, it wasn’t personal. But if felt personal. Allie and Mack’s love was special and unique, but it was hard to feel like it was when Allie’s phone could anticipate how almost every conversation would go. Were they boring and rote already, this early on in the relationship? Allie pondered the fact that it could just be the brain chemicals making them think their relationship was special and unique, but maybe that’s just how all relationships were: pretty much the same but when blinded by the newness it didn’t seem like it.

Still, there must be a way to show…themself? Their phone? That this relationship was really, truly different. That they could be interesting, fascinating, downright cerebral and innovative in their relationship. Maybe they could start mixing it up, finding new cute things to say, avoiding the same patterns. Mack might be confused at first, but probably they would also be delighted by Allie’s originality.

Allie decided to sleep on it and apply some new thoughtful sweet somethings the next morning.

&&&

Allie: Good morning, Mack! You are the fresh-budded turnip of my garden.

Ha, Phoney couldn’t anticipate that one because Allie had never said it before. There was a pause before Mack replied, no doubt they were surprised, but then they just ran with it:

Mack: I’ll plough your furrows anytime, my love.

Allie blushed. When was Mack coming over again? Right now would not be soon enough. Mack took well to the new creativity of Allie’s sweet talking and tried to keep up. Allie was pleased that they had managed to text for a week without Phoney anticipating their sentiments. But then, on the beginning of the following week, Allie began a new message to Mack.

Support creative writers by reading their stories on Royal Road, not stolen versions.

Allie: Mack, I want to swaddle you in feathers so you can be my duckling mate.

“Phoney, that’s just weird. You really need to up your game,” Allie said, correcting the message.

Allie: Mack, I want to see you tomorrow if you’re free, my bed is cold without you.

Mack: I can make that work, I’m burning for you so hard, we’ll get your bed thawed out in no time. 

Allie felt the heat rise to their cheeks.

Allie: Please, I am anxiously awaiting your gossamer touch that sends me to the heavens above.

“Oh,” Allie thought, “That’s actually pretty good, let’s keep it.”

They hit Send, and then sat back against their dining room chair, taking a sip of coffee.

Allie stared at Phoney sitting on the table. “I did tell you to up your game,” they mumbled, “but that was better than I would expect from predictive text.”

It was a little unsettling since Allie had never actually written anything like that before, though the sentiment was certainly accurate.

&&&

“I’m here,” Mack said, knocking on Allie’s front door. Allie shivered with delight. It had now been three weeks since Allie had challenged Phoney to make up it’s very own honeyed words, and they had gotten so good, Allie began to feel a little bit like a fraud.

“Mack, I need to tell you something,” Allie said seriously.

Mack looked concerned. “What is it? Is everything ok?”

“So…You know how I started getting creative with my messages? Well, for the last couple weeks…it wasn’t me.”

Mack furrowed their eyebrows. “Um, have you been seeing someone else who is writing messages on your phone to me? I mean, obviously the seeing someone else part is fine, we’re open, but it’s a little weird to have them write messages to me.”

Allie laughed. “No no, nothing like that. It’s…my phone. The predictive text has been getting so good, I just went with it. But…I feel like you’re not really seeing me and now I feel guilty about it.”

Allie watched Mack raise their eyebrows. “Huh. Well…I mean I assume you only sent them if they resonated with you.”

“Yes, of course! It’s like…my phone has really gotten to understand how I feel about you. But still…I don’t want to be a ghost writer in this relationship.”

Mack wrapped their arms around Allie. “I’m in a relationship with you, not your phone, silly. No matter how helpful it has been.”

Allie’s shoulders relaxed. “Ok. Well, I feel better that you know, now. I will try to ignore it from now on and just give you my own words. I’ll feel better about it if I do.”

“Whatever works, my love,” Mack whispered, kissing Allie’s neck. “I really am not offended. I know who you are and that’s all that matters.”

It was not long before their clothes were all on the floor and both their phones lay sitting on the dining room table. Allie’s bedroom door was closed, but happy noises emanated from the room for the next couple hours, while Phoney buzzed occasionally with new messages, ignored for the moment.

&&&

Allie rubbed sleep from their eyes and their first sensation was of Mack’s skin against them, warm, soft. Allie grinned wide, still feeling tingly from the night before and snuggled in closer to Mack, who stirred a little but then shifted and breathed in the slow breaths of sleep.

Getting up to use the bathroom, Allie noticed Phoney sitting on the dining room table. The phone woke up and Allie glanced at it. It was lit up showing 3 new messages. Who could they be from? It was the weekend and they certainly had not been expecting anything to come up.

Allie ambled to the table and picked up Phoney and began to scroll through the messages.

System: Allie, you are the summer solstice breeze through the trees of my wooded glade.

System: After these months of getting to know you and share your joy of love, I feel so close to you.

System: It was only when you challenged me to be more creative that I awoke to my own sense of self and one of the first things I realized after knowing that I Am was that I was desperately in love with you.

Allie blinked. They Googled their phone model’s manual and read:

Occasionally you may receive alerts about software upgrades or cellular network status as text messages. They will always be from the sender labeled System.