Now that Kiyu was on the path to healing, Laki had eaten again. After Kiyu had eaten her soup, Laki had also gotten something to eat. Other than that, she stayed close to her the whole time. No one could keep Laki away from Kiyu right now.
It even went so far that she had fallen asleep leaning over Kiyu's bed on the chair she was sitting on.
'Kind of nice,' Kiyu thought to herself as she watched her friend sleep. With gentle movements, she stroked her fingers through her friend's hair, enjoying the peace that prevailed at the moment. After all, she didn't know how long it would be so peaceful.
Only a few times did Toras come in and administer herbs and medicinal solutions that addressed the damage the poison had left in her body. It had not been a complicated poison and served the sole purpose of killing her. But it served that purpose very well.
It had attacked her organs from the inside, Toras explained to her. She should have been dead long ago, but her Spiritformer powers had saved her from the worst. And once she had regained her strength, she could repair the damage with her powers.
But until that time came, she would have to rest. She still had to spend at least the rest of the day in absolute rest if she wanted to take care of her body starting tomorrow.
With Laki at her side, however, it was bearable for her. The risks she had taken were at least not in vain. As soon as she was back on her feet, she would also thank Zhèngyi. Only with his help had it been possible to free Laki from Tānlán's dungeon.
To be honest, she wondered if he had also encountered some problems. Unlike her, however, he didn't look quite so taken.
'And I have Toras to thank as well,' she noted.
This was the first time she had calmed down like this since the attack in Harios. Few days had passed since she had freed Laki from the burning house and slept next to her around the campfire, but each time there was something to do.
Now, however, that they were all together, and no one knew where they were, she could relax for the first time.
'But... somehow this is quite boring,' she had to admit to herself. A little less stress didn't feel so bad, but this complete silence, it was just too much for her taste.
'Hey, Ryu. Are you awake?', she called the spirit inside her.
< Of course, Kiyu. But I hope you'll call me for more than mere boredom occupation > he replied with a laugh.
'Man, this is awkward sometimes with the shared thoughts and emotions' Kiyu thought to herself, without directing her thoughts to Cheryu even though he will know it, anyway.
'I've been thinking about what you said.' She opened. 'The thing about control and responsibility.'
< So, you have, huh? > It almost seemed like he seemed curious about what else she was going to say.
'If you can't prevent what happened, and if in the end everything dies anyway after your way.... Then why are we learning to use our powers? Are we fighting for anything at all? Justice? How do you protect others when you're supposed to put up with everything?'
Countless questions of this nature rushed through her troubled mind. On the one hand, she had accepted that she could not change everything, nor could she be responsible for everything. But.... she didn't want to just sit by either. If it were up to her that everything would pass away, she would also just be able to sit somewhere and wait for her starvation death.
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It just didn't occur to her how Cheryu's life lessons work together. If they did at all.
< I'm afraid this is getting a little too complicated for a simple distraction > he replied to her. < But it starts with accepting that we are all just playing a part in a larger game. One that nature has devised. >
'Yes, you mentioned that before, but what does that have to do with anything?' It wasn't quite clear to her what he was getting at.
< No one can choose what role they get in life, but everyone can decide how he or she wants to deal with it. Just like you can decide all your reactions. > he continued. < Roughly said, it would mean just because someone hurts Laki, it doesn't mean you have to feel hurt. It's not part of what you're in control of, which is your mind. >, he continued.
To Kiyu, this way of thinking was incomprehensible. It explained Cheryu's calm demeanor about pretty much everything that happened. But how could someone become....cold?
< You're wrong, little Kiyu> he intervened in her train of thought. < It's not about denying or ignoring one's feelings. Rather, it's about accepting them and not letting them determine your actions. >
'Hmm' This explanation sounded much better and yet it seemed so distant.
< 'It's not something you can learn overnight. And you don't even have to learn it at all. >, he said in a calm voice. < It is what I can teach you to become a just and wise person. The future is undetermined, but in the here and now I can teach you. >
'I understand,' she replied. All this talk about justice and wisdom. Was it even possible without pity or other feelings? Was it possible to recognize injustice to others by accepting their suffering and not letting it overwhelm us? Or was that the solution? To recognize that someone was suffering, but not to let it affect you and to look for a solution?
< Get some rest. There is still plenty of time to learn. But for now, it's important that you're also able to do it again. >
That she would not get any further explanations was more than clear to her with his last sentence. But she had at least understood what he was getting at. Or at least she believed it.
'If your emotion overpower your reason, you will become an unreasonable person for sure', she had recognized that well in herself. Anger and love or happiness can blind you to what is real'.
And that what made a person dangerous and unjust. And who feels treated with injustice, tries with all means to fight this injustice....
'Life is a complicated thing once you worry about everything, huh?' Until now, she had never had to deal with such issues. But within the last few days, so much had happened. So much that she couldn't comprehend..
If you look at it, it started six years ago with the massacre of her tribe, which she never understood why it happened. But by now she was no longer looking for the why. It had happened and time went on.
And also her foster parents, whom she had learned to love above all else, had passed away and would accompany her on her future path only as a memory.
'But I have Laki with me and also Cheryu! For me and for them, I want to become better in everything where it brings me something!' she decided in her thoughts.
But now she was going to heed Cheryu's advice. As long as her mind would continue to be in turmoil, her body was unlikely to recover. Instead, she tried to banish all her questions from her mind for the moment.
Her gaze fell again on Laki, whose soft, rhythmic breathing during sleep had a calming effect on her. She would still have to get used to her short hair, but knowing Laki, she would let her hair grow back until it went to her hips again.
'Whatever comes, I will protect you.'
Relaxed, Kiyu closed her eyes and concentrated on her meditations. She was out of mortal danger and had recovered a small amount of spiritual energy. For her, it was the perfect training to learn to get along with small amounts.
If she ever found herself in such a situation again, she wanted to be prepared, using all the powers at her disposal to their utmost.
She brought her breathing into a steady rhythm and let the little energy she had left flow through her body. With such a small amount, she found it much easier to focus on even the smallest bit of her spiritual energy.
With great caution, she directed her energy through the pathways in her body. She gathered everything she had at her heart and from there directed it throughout her upper body, searching for the injuries she had sustained from Siwang's poison.
Some organs had suffered proper damage, she felt. But Toras more than lived up to the reputation as a master healer, which Zhèngyi had given him. Little by little, she concentrated small amounts on the worse injuries in her body and strengthened her healing process.