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AVCCS GMod Misadventures, S01E01: "Survival of the Idiots"
AVCCS GMod Misadventures, S01E01: Survival of the Idiots (Chapter V)

AVCCS GMod Misadventures, S01E01: Survival of the Idiots (Chapter V)

"AH! AH! AH! GET IT OFF! GET IT OFF! GET IT OFF!" Chase repeatedly yelled in the voice of Spongebob Squarepants at the top of his lungs.

He began to swerve the minivan to try and shake the creature off of the vehicle but to no avail.

CRASH!!!

Unfortunately, Luke's efforts in trying to shake the creature off the hood of the minivan were in vain, as he unintentionally ended up crashing into the side of a building. The front windows of the van shattered, sending glass shards everywhere, airbags deployed, and smoke hissing from the engine. By some lucky miracle, none of the four men were injured severely by the glass shards.

Chase and Samuel did not put their seatbelts on, which caused both of the men to launch forwards.

"JESUS CHRIST!" Chase called out from the impact and groaned in pain after being launched toward the back of Luke's seat.

"OW!" Samuel yelled as he hit the back of Christopher's seat, before putting his hand on the side of his head.

"BAIL OUT! THIS VEHICLE HAS HAD IT!" Luke ordered in the voice of the World of Tanks crew voice.

"ALLE AUS! DAS FAHRZEUG IST ERLEDIGT!!!" Christopher commanded.

(Translation: "EVERYBODY OUT! THIS VEHICLE IS DONE FOR!!!")

The four men grabbed their guns and bags and bailed out from the wrecked minivan. Fortunately, the creature that had jumped on the front window of their vehicle was dead, having been sandwiched in between the front of the Grand Voyager and the brick wall of the building they collided with. Angry expressions made their way onto both Chase's and Luke's faces, as the latter's eyes turned into literal fireballs.

The two angry men were furious that, whatever the red humanoid thing was, had made their minivan crash by jumping on top of the hood and front window, practically jump scaring them moments prior. Chase dragged the corpse off of the hood, and he and his friend began to mercilessly curb-stomp the dead, red humanoid.

"Motherfucker!" Luke shouted in anger.

"You son of a bitch!" Chase yelled at the dead body.

"Guys, guys! Y'all just beatin' a dead horse, let's get outta here!" Samuel responded, tugging on Luke's shoulder to get him to stop and come along.

The two obeyed, as they followed Samuel and Christopher. The four ran through the streets once again, firing at the undead to clear their path.

"OH MY GOD, GET TO WINNEBAGO!!!" Chase loudly yelled in a frenzied voice.

"What the fuck are you talking about?!" Samuel asked, very confused about Chase's erratic outburst.

"OVER THERE, GET TO WINNEBAGO!!!" Chase exclaimed again.

He pointed his right finger while holding the riot shield in his left, in the direction of an RV, which was a large, 6-Wheeled, 37-Foot, Class A Motorhome, a to be exact.

[https://mobilehomes.s3.amazonaws.com/photo/a4/a4da/a4dad653-b49f-453e-ab9f-9f29e8f91944.jpg]

[Author's Note: The picture provided is Actually a 1987 Model of the aforementioned Motorhome, but it's the closest I could find to a model from 1986.]

"ALLE, GEHEN SIE ZUM BUS!!!" Christopher frantically yelled.

(Translation: "EVERYONE, GET TO THE BUS!!!" [OR] "EVERYONE, GO TO THE BUS!!!")

Then, the four ran to the side doors of the RV, Luke and Christopher stood guard in front of the rear door on the right, while Chase and Samuel stood next to the passenger side door. Chase placed down the riot shield and switched back to firing with his M16A4.

Chase turned to Luke and exclaimed the following:

"Yo, Luke! Yo dumbass better not throw any grenades! This is one fine Winnebago, in fact, my Uncle used to own one of these when I was a wee little lad."

Christopher then turned to face Luke and stopped firing his gun.

"Private Luke!" Christopher bellowed in a Drill Sergeant voice.

"SIR, YES, SIR!" Luke replied, before looking at Christopher, lowering his gun and taking his finger off the trigger.

"Because of your clumsy little stunt earlier, Your grenade privileges will be revoked until further notice, do you understand that, Private?"

"SIR, YES, SIR!" Luke responded, playing along as a Private speaking to Drill Sergeant Christopher.

"Now hand 'em over, please," Christopher replied in a strict voice.

"SIR, YES SIR!" His friend replied, taking out 5 frag grenades from his inventory and handing them over to Christopher. Luke felt pretty embarrassed, with his head down, but he had to comply, and at least Chris had the kindness and decency to say 'please'.

"Thank you, Private, if your performance improves, I'll consider repealing your grenade ban," Christopher said, still in the strict voice but with a sincere smile. He then placed the quintet of explosives into his bag.

Chase and Samuel snickered a bit after seeing Luke get his grenade privileges taken away, like a father grounding their child from electronics. Chase then stopped firing at the undead and tugged on the door handle of the RV with his right hand. A genuine happy and excited smile was plastered across the lad's face, as after pulling on the handle, the passenger side door opened.

"Guys get in! This is our ride out of here!" Chase said, climbing into the passenger seat of the RV while firing his rifle out the open door.

Christopher opened the side door of the RV, which, fortunately, was unlocked, hopped into the interior of the vehicle, and signaled his two friends to enter.

"Alle einsteigen! Das Fahrzeug wille Nimm uns zu die Gelobtes Land!" Christopher shouted, as if he were a train conductor.

(Translation: "All aboard! This vehicle will take us to the Promised Land!")

He moved out of the way as Luke and Samuel filed in, with the latter slamming the door shut.

"Luke, use your battery pack to hotwire this thang, and let's get out of here!" Samuel shouted.

A devious, but determined smirk made its way across Luke's face.

"I've got this..." Luke said in a voice that just radiated someone hell-bent on doing something.

He placed his machine gun on the floor of the vehicle, took off the shield on his back with the strapped car battery, and sat in the driver's seat. Same as how he did with the Purple Plymouth Grand Voyager from earlier, he unlatched the compartment under the dashboard, detached the steering column's housing, and saw several wires. He took his pocket knife and gently did his best to slit the protective insulation of one of the wires of the motorhome, and after a few seconds, he was able to cut and expose the bare wire.

He adjusted the voltage setting on his high-end car battery by turning the dial, which caused a small amount of sparks to shoot out from one of the exposed bare wires connected to the car battery.

"This is some Memphis City Crackhead shit, for real, you don't see a dude with a car battery strapped to a shield," Samuel commented.

"Hey, if it works, it works, right?" Luke replied with a mischievous smile.

"Yeah, I guess you right, man," Samuel responded.

Luke resumed his work, and pulled the sparking wire towards the wire he had cut, and... The RV's engine roared to life, and he quickly turned off his car battery so it didn't shoot any more sparks than it needed to.

A devilish grin made its way across Luke's face, and once again, he let out an absolute dastardly supervillain laugh. Chase, Christopher, and Samuel looked mildly disturbed and uncomfortable, and even though they had heard Luke's evil laugh on many occasions, it just didn't really sit well with them that this man's vocals could deliver such a cackle.

Chase rolled his eyes, slightly fed up with Luke's laughing session. He didn't really mind him letting out an evil laugh from time to time, but this was the zombie apocalypse for god's sake. Chase extended his right arm, clenched his fist, and slugged his buddy's shoulder.

"What the hell's the matter what you? Step on it and let's get the fuck outta here!" Chase yelled.

"Oh shit, right, right, right!" Luke said frantically, seemingly snapping out of his evil laughter trance, slamming his heavy black boot onto the gas pedal of the Winnebago, and flooring it. Because it was a much heavier vehicle than standard cars you'd find on the road, acceleration from the 37-Foot Winnebago was sluggish, and RVs were more oriented towards comfort and living on the road, rather than speed. Chase slammed his passenger side door shut and leaned back in the large, cushioned passenger seat of the RV.

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The four men breathed heavily, and let out a collective sigh of relief. No more firing, no more running, just on the open road, breezing past the shambling zombies.

[Author's Note: The following is the reference to the floor plan of a 37-Foot Winnebago Elandan Class A Motorhome, and even though this reference is from 1989, I think it's still close enough to the 1986 model, just go down to page 11 and the bottom floor plan is the 37-Foot one.]

[https://www.rvroundtable.com/wp-content/uploads/winnebago/1989/1989.Elandan.pdf]

Samuel and Christopher both relaxed on the couch that was positioned behind the driver's seat, weapons laid out on the floor.

"I've... Never been inside of an RV before..." Christopher commented.

"Me neither, but it sure is nice to drive one of these," Luke said in a relaxed tone, with a casual smile on his face. He seemed to be enjoying it behind the wheel of a large, comfortable vehicle that was the size of a bus, which was essentially the king of the road. Traffic wasn't that much of an issue, as he wasn't behind any Prius Driver driving their car so slow to try and save as much gas as possible all for the sake of being environmentally friendly and trying to reduce their carbon footprint.

The closest things to 'Traffic' in this zombie-infested city, were abandoned and wrecked cars, and zombies, which weren't really any big deal. Other pleasant things he found about the whole experience behind the wheel of a nearly 40-foot long, Class A Motorhome was that the vehicle rode smoothly and had exceptional handling. But perhaps the best thing of all was that he and his three best friends were going to escape the zombie-infested city, not only all in one piece and without any signs of infection, but they were doing it... In style.

As they drove out of the suburban residential region of the city, they entered an urban metropolis... Everything was in ruins... Shattered glass, trash, corpses, debris, and vehicles in various states of disrepair were strewn about. Many objects and places were on fire, including some of the deceased corpses, and even a few zombies. The four men were quiet, just taking in the eerie environment...

This part of the city was once a Middle/High-Class metropolis full of commercial businesses, but now? It was nothing but a shell of its former self, destruction and dead bodies lay everywhere. They all took mental notes of what they witnessed and continued to drive on. Eventually, after navigating through the metropolitan ruins, they were approaching an entrance ramp onto a freeway.

As soon as he spotted the entrance ramp, Luke sped up.

"Hey Luke, you already crashed that purple minivan, don't try and crash this Winnebago and kamikaze us all," Chase said mockingly.

"Fuck you, Chase," Luke responded in a bit of an annoyed tone.

"Ay, Chill man, I was just joking with you man, I know it wasn't your fault, that ugly red thing jumped across the hood of the minivan and caused us to crash," Chase explained.

"Everything you do is a joke, you've been a fucking crackhead that hasn't gotten your shit together since the age of 10." Luke snarkily responded.

"That ain't true!" Chase said, raising his fist, about to punch his friend again.

"Y'all, just chill the fuck out, you hear?!" Samuel's voice boomed.

"We're on our way out of this place, let's all just be glad that we've made it this far!" Samuel added.

Samuel's words managed to defuse the verbal altercation, as Luke returned to driving the RV, and Chase lowered his fist and looked out the window.

"But Chase? He did have truth to his statement." Samuel said with a mocking grin, which caused Chase to flip Samuel the bird, but he didn't react in hostility, only snickering a bit.

"You know? Maybe listening to some tunes oughta set the mood right." Samuel suggested.

He reached into his duffel bag, pulled out a Bluetooth speaker, connected his phone to the speaker, and began to play 'It Was a Good Day' by Ice Cube. As soon as the music began to play, it seemed like a switch had flipped. Chase and Luke began to smile, and they bobbed their heads to the tune of the song. Samuel joined in and started to bob his head to the song, and even Christopher joined in.

It seemed like the music had brought everyone together (especially Chase and Luke and their near-constant bickering) after fighting for their lives during the zombie apocalypse, they were simply vibing along to the music, with Samuel even singing a few lines.

"Shake 'em up, shake 'em up, shake 'em up, shake 'em! Roll 'em in a circle of niggas, and watch me break 'em Wit' the seven, 7-11, 7-11 Seven, even back do' Lil Joe I picked up the cash flow Then we played bones, and I'm yellin' "Domino!" Plus nobody I know got killed in South Central LA Today was a good day, shit!" Samuel sang along, in sync with the lyrics.

As they drove on, many songs were played and they sang along to the lyrics.

"You can be whatever you want when you're high... Walk slowly with a spirit by your side, oh baby... Don't fear if you lose your mind... Say "how you doing?" Boy, I'm feeling fine... When something carries me away, hey hey hey hey..." Luke sang the first chorus from the Dance/Electronic song "With a Spirit" by 009 Sound System.

"I can't stand this indecision Married with a lack of vision Everybody wants to rule the world Say that you'll never, never, never, never need it One headline, why believe it? Everybody wants to rule the world..." Christopher sang, from the song "Everybody Wants to Rule the World" by Tears for Fears.

The lyrics Chase sang, were from the song "Eastbound and Down" by Jerry Reed:

"Eastbound and down, loaded up and truckin' A-we gonna do what they say can't be done We've got a long way to go, and a short time to get there I'm eastbound, just watch ol' "Bandit" run..."

But there was one song all four of the friends sang karaoke together, and that was "Any Way You Want It" by Journey:

"She said Any way you want it That's the way you need it Any way you want it I said, any way you want it That's the way you need it Any way you want it..."

The four simply were just vibing, having a good time, and doing their best to detox stress after surviving the zombie apocalypse, for now at least. They sang along, smiles on their faces, brightness shining in their voices, and had no judgment or ridicule for anything the boys' music tastes. As they continued in their (Stolen) Winnebago, they noticed how the urban highway had changed to a more rural and countryside highway as they had successfully escaped the zombie-infested city.

Fields of wheat and corn lined the sides of the highway, along with rural homes, farms, farm equipment, and grain elevators in the distance. The highway wasn't exactly clear, as it was littered with abandoned cars, but, there always seemed to be an open lane free of any obstructions for the four men to carry on with their journey safely. As they sang along to their respective songs, it was Luke's turn to pick which song he wanted to listen to, and he had his phone connected to Samuel's Bluetooth speaker.

He clicked on a video from his playlist and the next lyrics everyone heard were-

"Sweet little bumblebee I know what you want from me Doo bi doo bi doo da da Doo bi doo bi doo da da Sweet little bumblebee More than just a fantasy Doo bi doo bi doo da da Doo bi doo bi doo da da" - "Bumblebee" by Bambee

Upon hearing those lyrics, Luke was in utter shock, and he blushed heavily.

"FUCK!!!, now they know the kinda shit I listen to!" He thought to himself

He was too shocked to even pause the music or turn off his phone, and when he did regain the ability to do so after regaining his senses, he turned his phone off, and the RV went dead silent. Chase, Christopher, and Samuel all had their eyes on Luke, and it was just awkward silence... Until... The three burst out laughing, causing poor 'ol Luke to blush even harder in embarrassment.

"You've got THAT saved on your playlist? Let me guess, you're in love with that one Bee/Fox, whatever chick from Helluva Boss, aren't you? Ya furry-" Chase teased.

"Shut up!" Luke hastily and frantically replied.

"Hey Luke, no worries man! We ain't here to judge you man, we're just vibing and riding and style while surviving the apocalypse! We made it out of the city without dying, didn't we? Loosen up, good buddy!" Samuel said encouragingly as he placed his large hand on his buddy's shoulder in a friendly manner.

"Hey, Chris? You Did say earlier that only two percent of us right here today would be killed in a major battle?" Chase asked his friend.

"Uhm... Yeah? I said it in my speech earlier... And, 2% of us doesn't even count as a whole person, and, we're all here so... My predictions were right, I guess." Christopher replied in a humble tone

"Let me check myself... Am I dead? Did Luke kamikaze us and get us all killed?" Chase asked in a mocking tone, patting himself down with his hands.

Luke turned his head to the right and gave Chase an annoyed death stare.

"Ignore that motherfucker, you did good today, man," Samuel replied in a supportive tone while giving his friend a thumbs-up.

Luke replied by giving Sam a small, but sincere smile.

"Thanks, man, I appreciate it, I'd like to thank every one of you guys for... You know, sticking by my side through this entire journey, I know it's not over yet but... I'm just glad you guys have stuck with me."

He then turned his head to Chase.

"I know you could be a dumbass fucking clown most of the time, but... I love you man, no homo." Luke said to his goofball friend.

"Aye, no problem, lad." Chase said with a smile, not even minding that he was called a 'Dumbass fucking clown' by his friend.

"Men?" Christopher asked in a Drill Sergeant-Esque voice.

The three turned their heads to Chris.

Christopher cleared his throat and said:

"We've survived another massive battle against the zombies and other creatures of the night. I am honored to fight alongside you courageous and valiant individuals." Christopher said with a sincere smile before saluting.

His three friends smiled back and nodded their heads, giving their commando friend a salute back. With that, the four continued to cruise down the highway in their RV.

5:01 AM...

After a session of mutual, musical motorhome melodies, It was all quiet in the motorhome as they continued to drive on... Christopher was fast asleep on the couch, MP 40 in his arms as if he was holding an infant. Samuel was half-asleep, with one eye open, but he was trying to do his best to stay awake. His right eye twitched as he tried to keep it open.

Luke was doing his best to focus on the road. Atop the dashboard were three crushed cans, one being a can of Soy Milk, the next being a can of Cherry Pepsi, and the last being a can of Red Bull. He had bags under his eyes and was slumped over, his back hunched and his face inches from the steering wheel. It looked like the man was seconds close to passing out.

But somehow, still going strong was Chase. He had his signature goofy grin and his eyes were cross-eyed, as he stared out the windshield at the open highway road ahead.

Luke turned his head to the right and saw Chase's goofy grin and was a little bit startled, but more confused.

"Why are you so happy?" He asked, eyebrows raised.

In a derpy and goofy voice, the smile not leaving his face, he said:

"I don't know, It's because I've-I've got friends."

"Yeah... Whatever you say, man." Luke replied, unamused.

He focused his attention back on driving the RV. His eyelids grew heavier and heavier, and it seemed no matter how much sugar and caffeine he had coursing through his veins, it wasn't helping him stay up and be the designated driver. He was just about to go to sleep when suddenly...

"OH MY GOD, GET TO WINNEBAGO!!!" Chase shouted manically at the top of his lungs.

Luke's eyes widened and he jolted up, feeling adrenaline being shot into his heart right after his friend's yell.

Christopher was awake, his head on a swivel and aiming his MP 40 all over the RV.

"Ah! What's going on?! Is it the Russians?!" Christopher asked, panicked.

"Huh?!" Samuel said, confused.

Luke's expression then turned to anger and annoyance, and he punched Chase in the head, a metallic clang heard when his fist came into contact with Chase's helmet he wore on his head.

"You fucking dumbass, what the hell are you screaming about?"

"No, dude, Look! Get to Winnebago, stupid!" Chase said while continuing to point outside the window.

A few meters ahead was a green highway exit sign and in bright, white, bold letters read the word "Winnebago", indicating if they got off the highway it would lead them to either a city or town by the name of Winnebago.

Luke stared at his friend, and gave him the side eye before driving down towards the exit...

The End...

(The End of AVCSS S01E1 Part V... To Be Continued? Probably not, Lolz.)