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Author's Rant
[S] Authorception

[S] Authorception

You know, he doesn't like you.

"Yes, I know. I can't control who I have a crush on. Now shut up and let me write." Diana studiously tried to ignore the voice that only she could hear. It could speak directly into her mind whenever it wanted, and she couldn't do anything about it. Recently, however, the voice had taken to critiquing her daily life.

Diana focused on her laptop screen, trying to see how the scene would play out. This was the scene where Hana would realize she-

Now, Joseph, that boy has a crush on you. He's been eyeing you for weeks.

Diana cursed, drawing a few looks her way from others at the café. "Can you please stop talking about boys? I'm trying to concentrate."

Sorry my bad.

With a sigh, she got back to her story. Where was she? Right. Hana realized she was-

So, how about Hope? She seems nice.

Diana slammed her laptop shut, packed up, and stormed out.

You okay? You seem a bit upset.

Unauthorized tale usage: if you spot this story on Amazon, report the violation.

"Of course I'm upset. You keep distracting me, all the time. I failed my calc exam because you kept saying exactly what I was thinking, but changed a few numbers on every occasion. You're making me look insane by talking to you out loud because, and I quote, 'I can only hear you if you speak.' You told me this despite knowing that I know how authors work. You can just read my fucking thoughts!"

At this point, Diana was huffing as she stormed down the sidewalk back to her apartment. The voice in her head was silent for the longest time so far, allowing Diana to calm down some. The voice didn't speak again until after she had collapsed on her bed.

Look, I apologize. I feel like we got off on the wrong foot here. Hello there DIana. I am Megan, your author. I fuck with you because, just like how you don't think Hana is real, I don't believe you're real. You are simply a figment of my imagination that I decided to record. How are you today?

Diana groaned into her bedsheets. "I'm doing just fine, thanks for asking. And I know I'm real, you stuck-up voice in the sky. If I wasn't real, then I wouldn't have free will, which I very obviously do." She rolled onto her back and slapped herself.

"What the fuck!"

She slapped herself again.

"What is-stop! Stop doing this!"

She smacked both her palms onto her cheeks, hard enough to leave a faint imprint behind.

"Fine! I don't exist! Happy?" Diana screamed at the ceiling.

Yes. There's just something cathartic about having your own creation beat themselves up.

The two of them were silent for a while, before Diana voiced the question that had been on her mind for a while.

"So, if Hana's my creation, and I'm yours, does that mean that someone created you?"

Don't be ridiculous. If I'm fake, my author will force me to stop talki-